Pigeon Crisis: operation sunscreen
Chapter 1
….. News just in: the pigeons of central park are gathering in a sort of… ring like structure. The reports are unconfirmed; however, that president Nixon is somehow involved. Stay tuned for updates on the strange amassing of the pigeons, squawked the news, on the television. Dengaku man was extremely annoyed as he sat in front of the plasma screen TV. His favorite program, bibibi-bi-bibibi, had been cancelled for a stupid news report. The weather outside was quite gloomy, and this did not add to the mood of the currently emo-tastic D-man. "if those pigeons were gone," thought dengaku man,"then I bet they would return to normal program scheduling!" He raced out the door to find central park. We now return to normal programming, warbled the TV.
Chapter 2
Dengaku man proceeded to buy a plane ticket, arrive barely on time, get in a fight with the baggage clerk over illegal pet taco trade, sprint on to the train, remember he didn't buy a train ticket, buy a train ticket, get on the train, remember that he can't take a train to new York from Japan, run to the airport, resume the fight with the baggage clerk, jump on the plane, sleep for 10 hours, wake up, get off, go to the bag return, lose his luggage, sob in despair for his lost tacos, catch a cab and arrive in central park. The sight was so appalling; dengaku man lost his half-digested airline pretzels. There was no going back now.
Chapter 3
We near the end of this segment of story with another short chapter. Dengaku man rushed past a group of singing hippies smoking weed, and stopped short not soon after, as he saw the pillar of amassing pigeons, about 50 in circumference, and 200 feet tall. After a quick assessment of the situation, he went back to beat up a hippie and steal his box of weed. The intoxicated nature loving tree hugger barely noticed. Dengaku man lit the box, and tossed it in to fray of frolicking pigeons. WHOOSH! Thousands of birds lit on fire, or fell to the ground in a hippie-like trance induced by the pot. The tower climbed on, and the attack was of no avail. But inside the column, a voice rung out, "go to the secret under ground layer of the pigeon king, and end this maddnessssss….." Dengaku man was appalled! He had lost his spoon in that luggage bag! But just then, a gaping pit opened underneath him, and he fell down, down, down, as millions more pigeons came up, up, up! And with that, the huge amassment of pigeons flew in to the sunset, no, at the sunset!
Epilogue
It seems that pigeon kind is grouping at not only central park, but also locations world wide, and are flying steadily towards a central location that is to be determined… said the voice of TV ace news reporter and attorney at law, Don Patch, in the recently vacated home of dengaku man. He left the TV on! GASP!