Disclaimer: I don't own Castle, but I sure like to mess with him through Kate of course.
A/N: This takes place shortly after Linchpin and she develops her skills during our 3 week Hiatus Castle fans. Kate is smart and seeing as she's already been kind of playing guitar like the end of episode 3x14, I feel she can pick it up pretty quickly and be able to at least play some folk songs. I'm a self-taught guitar player myself and once I learned the chords at least I could look the rest up online. Check out some of my YouTube videos if you get time tfnmal23! Thanks for reading and please comment! As always I appreciate you!
Author's apology: Goodness, I thought I edited this before sending and I DID NOT. Shut the front door, right? Well I apologize and I've went through and fixed it. Oh and I didn't tell you how long this will go. At first I was going for a one shot, but it will definitely be less than 5 chapters. Enjoy!
Kate walks into Dr. Burke's office for her weekly hour session with the good doctor. It isn't always her favorite hour of her day, but she is really trying to make a valiant effort to get passed her scars, PTSD in general and move on to a real life; find who she is.
"Good Morning, Kate." She has her to go coffee in hand.
"Good Morning, Dr. Burke."
She takes her usual seat across from Dr. Burke. "So Kate, last time we talked you were trying to figure out a hobby. Did you come up with anything?"
"Actually at first, I'll admit, I found this 'homework' for lack of a better word really tough because I am so busy and really I don't have time for myself. So I asked my friend Lanie and Castle what they thought. Well of course they told me that I need to make time and they are right. So I thought about it this whole week and I came up with a couple things that I would like to work on that might help me. One is writing. Maybe a diary, poems, thoughts, etc. and the other learning to play guitar. I have a guitar that was a gift from my father and I've always wanted to learn and it will be challenging for me."
"That's great. I'm glad that you asked for help from others also. That is a huge step to recovery, Kate. So otherwise, how is everything else going? It sounds like you are bridging the gaps in relationships with friends, so that is good news."
"Everything is going great actually. I've been sleeping great. No nightmares in a long time."
"Well unless you have anything else you would like to discuss, I think you should head out and plan time for your new found hobbies and see where it leads you."
"Ok great. I'm really looking forward to it. See you next week."
"See you next week."
(…)
Kate grabbed a cab and made her way home from Dr. Burke's office. She had just got into the cab and gave the driver her address, when her phone rang. She answered it.
"What do you want, Castle?"
"Ouch," she can't still be mad at him for changing the music in her new cruiser from the CIA. She knows he touches things, so that shouldn't have been a surprise. Except when she yelled at him to stop, he got that she was annoyed. And she sounds annoyed now.
"I'm sorry. I forget sometimes how sensitive you are," she rolled her eyes and hoped he could sense her sincerity and sarcasm.
"Ha, funny, look I wanted to know if you want to get breakfast this morning. I want to show you the new cover art for the next book and see if you approve."
"You never asked my opinion on the first 3 books, so why all of a sudden my opinion matters?"
"Well things are different now, plus you are cute when you are angry, but not when you are angry at me. So I'm minimizing my ways of making you angry if at all possible."
"Haha," she let out a cute laugh and Castle felt some weight lifted off this conversation they were having.
"So what do you say?"
"I'm on my way home now, so I can change my direction. Where are we meeting?"
"Ok, another confession. I'm cooking right now, so come to the loft," he waited for her to banter more or say no. He got the opposite.
"Okay, I'll be there in 20. And Castle?"
"Mmm, yeah?"
"I like my eggs scrambled and I don't like them cold," she hung up the phone and smiled. Then she told the driver the new destination.
(...)
Kate rings the doorbell at Castle's loft. He quickly makes his way to the door.
"Good Morning, Detective, may I take your coat?"
"Mmm, yeah," she looks at him weirdly, "Castle, why are you so hyper?"
"I don't know. I'm happy to see you, but no time for small talk. Your eggs are ready as you requested."
She thinks to herself that she really needs to stop beating the poor guy up. How much more of her verbal abuse can this guy take? Their sexual tension and verbal banter is cute and she loves it, but she knows there is something real there under all of that. She knows this is a relationship she doesn't want to lose and she needs to work on her feelings in order for it to work.
She needs to start with letting down her defenses because when hers are up, so are his and if this happens neither of them will move forward.
She smiles at him, "Thank you. I'm starving. I could get used to this."
"Yeah? Well we have breakfast here every morning and you know where I live," he flirted back just enough for the invitation, but didn't spell forever to send her to grab her coat, leave for the elevator in 5 seconds flat.
"So let me see this cover art?"
He jetted to his office and came back with his lap top. "Paula just sent me this," as he placed the laptop in front of her on the counter.
"Is she naked again, Castle?"
"Why do you keep asking me that? You get the same answer, plus she isn't really naked, naked. It's a silhouette."
She nodded in agreement that he had a point, "So Frozen Heat, huh? Kind of an oxymoron, isn't it? I like it and the blue color. Love that."
"Yeah, I picked out the color myself this time. I think it grabs attention and goes well with the title. I'm glad you like it. Thanks."
She smiles as he closes his lap top and she thinks that more and more this was just a ploy to not eat breakfast alone. Kate knows that Castle isn't much of a loner, so although her opinion matters the real truth is that he just needed her company. They finished their breakfast together and took a cab to the precinct. There wasn't a victim yet, but day was still young.
(...)
They've been at the precinct for two hours now and no bodies have dropped, but a detective's job doesn't stop there. The dreadful paperwork was always waiting in the aftermath of closing cases and there were many times they got called into court to testify or called to give a deposition. Kate had an appointment for just that for a case in about an hour. Castle was coming back to her desk with two cups of coffee and he placed on down in front of her. She smiled at him, "Thank you."
"Where have you been?"
He raised his eyebrows in question and almost to show on his face. 'Did she sound like my wife right there?'
She placed her hands flat down on her desk and glared at him, "Not like that." He smiled and she rolled her eyes trying to hide her smile because he got to her. He's doing a lot more of that these days.
"Oh, Ryan was showing me how to use the new gadgets because...well you know I love toys," he smiled and took a sip of his coffee.
"Don't you have something better to do today? I mean, errands to run or writing?"
"Well you have that appointment, right? So I've got something to do with Esposito, if no bodies drop that is."
"Oh boy. I don't want to know."
"Kate, when you women say you don't want to know, it means you do, please. It isn't only men. I'm on to you."
"Really?" she glared at him.
"Yep, I'll change the subject to save you. How did your appointment with Dr. Burke go? Did you figure out a hobby? Are you finally going to take my advice and moonlight; cop by day, stripper by night?"
"As much as you have been fantasizing about that since you suggested it the first time, no I've thought of something still "hot", but not as demeaning," as she leaned in to tease him. What was she doing? She hadn't sexually teased him at all since she's known how he really feels about her. It dawned on her so she quickly sat back in her seat and looked down at her paperwork.
Castle dismissed it for now, but only because he wanted to genuinely hear about this idea she has.
"No seriously, Kate. I really want to know."
"Well, I have my guitar, the one you've seen at my apartment. Well, I want to take lessons. Ok, judge away."
"Really? That's pretty cool. I have no judgment here. Detective Beckett, you're still a mystery I may never solve," he stood up because he knew she needed to get going, "Well I'm going to head out. Talk to you later?"
"Yes, talk to you later."
"Oh, before I forget," he walked back up to her desk and leaned in close to her, "It is still hot. I agree." He left in the other direction to the elevator this time.
Kate just rolled her eyes at his sexual reference to her new hobby idea.
(...)
"Beckett" she answers her phone without looking at the caller ID.
"Hey, how did your deposition go?"
"Ah, it was longer than expected," her voice sounded tired and distance, but then there is a surprise, "How was your date with Esposito?"
"Oh and just when I thought you had no life in you. Look, what time will you be done with your paperwork? I know you are there and yawning because Ryan just texted me, so he should be bringing you a coffee in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...now." Ryan sets the coffee down on her desk and walks off. "So, when Kate?"
"Umm, I...," she shakes her head. 'Is he for real?'
"Hello? Kate?"
"Yeah, I'm here. I'm almost done. Maybe 30 minutes."
"Perfect! Ok, come to my place when you are done. I have a surprise for you."
"Castle, I'm tired and I really just want to go home to sleep."
"Kate, I know you are tired and that is why I had Ryan bring you coffee. I'm your permanent caffeine gopher, but don't make me beg, plus you'll ruin your surprise."
"I...I," she tried to make the words come out.
"I know you hate surprises, but you will like this one. Trust me."
"Okay, I will come over, but you will be responsible for my grumpy mood."
"Yes! You are going to love it!"
(...)
Kate steps out of the elevator on the floor to Castle's loft. She'll admit that she would rather not go home to her apartment alone. It's still early in the evening and she usually stays at the precinct until it is late enough to just go home to sleep. If she sits at home alone for too long, the thoughts in her head will take over, so there is no better time than the present to start this new hobby. She actually can't wait. She rings the doorbell at the loft.
"Kate, come in. Let me get your coat." He hung up her coat in the closet. He grabbed her by the hand and brought her into the living room. "I know you are tired, but I cooked and I have a surprise for you. After, I will take you home. I promise." He puts his hands on her shoulders and placed her down on the couch gently.
"Castle, you are kind of freaking me out."
"Why?"
"Well you are kind of hyper and excited."
"Oh, something that you don't know about me is that I love surprises. Giving and receiving them."
"Oh, I've known that about you. How can I not with your boyish immaturity? At times..."
"So I hope you like spaghetti and meat sauce, I'll be right back," he scurried to the kitchen to get their plates and back again for the wine and glasses. "Wine?"
"Yes, please. Where is Martha and Alexis?"
"Alexis is at internship #1 or #2, who knows? I can't keep up with her. Mother is at the acting studio teaching a class and I'm a little worried about this play she wrote, but let's not talk about that because I will need something stronger than this wine."
"Haha Castle, it sounds like the women in your life are very busy and you brought me here because you didn't want to eat alone."
"True, but I still have a surprise for you that will be here soon, so eat up buttercup," he winked and she glared.
"Don't call me buttercup, even if we were dating, that nickname wouldn't be appropriate ever," 'Oh my God, what did I just say?' as she took a big pull off of the wine.
"Dating, huh?" he couldn't leave it alone of course. 'Let's see how she was going to fish herself out of this one?'
Doorbells rings and she's off the hook…for now.
A young man is standing in the doorway to Castle's loft. Castle greets him and takes his coat. He walks him over to Kate.
"Detective Beckett, ah Kate, this is Dylan," Kate reached out to shake his hand. "Dylan is going to give you guitar lessons and if you both would excuse me for one second," he runs into his office and comes out with a guitar case. "Kate, I know you have a guitar and everything, but I got you this one, a really awesome one with a case and it comes with other stage equipment too. Anyway, check it out."
Kate gets up off the couch to go around the coffee table where he sat it down. She opened it up and it was a beautiful Taylor guitar, shiny, wooden grains just popping out. Screaming out for Kate to pick it up and she did. She held it in her hands and sat down in a chair in the living room. The feel of it was almost perfect and it fit better than the one her Dad gave to her. She would still keep it, but this guitar was just made for her. She finally looked up at Castle after reveling in the guitars looks and feel.
"Castle, this is amazing, but probably cost a fortune. I'll pay you back."
"No way, partner. It's a gift."
"Castle, it isn't my birthday and it isn't Christmas."
"Well what's the next holiday, St. Patrick's Day? There ya go," he laughed.
She glared and said, "I'm not Irish."
"Well I want you to have it. It looks like you were born to have it. Dylan here is going to give you lessons. Dylan, she is a quick study and she won't give up. This is a perfect challenge for her, so I'm going to clean up and leave you guys to it."
"Great, Mr. Castle," Dylan took his guitar out of his case and sat down across from Kate.
"If you guys need anything, I'll be in the kitchen or the office." he walked off all pleased with himself because the look on Kate's face was priceless. He hopes that he can keep surprising her with stuff because that girlish grin is nothing short of spectacular. Her happiness is what keeps him coming back and keeping hope alive.
(…)
After about an hour, Dylan left and Kate walked into Castle's office. He was writing, typing away on his laptop. He looked up as she walked in. She sat down in the chair across from him.
"So how did it go?"
"It was pretty awesome. I remember quite a few chords from when I learned in school and he is really a great teacher. I really love music and I kind of forget that with every day life getting in the way. I really want to make time for this because it does help me concentrate and focus on other things rather than my own thoughts which is good."
"That's awesome. I can't wait until I can hear you play me a song."
"Oh, I don't think so." Castle closed his laptop and got up from his desk.
"Well I can dream, so let's go. I'll take you home. You must be tired."
"I am, but I can just take a cab, Castle. You don't need to take me."
"Actually, why don't you stay in the Guest room? It's late. We can watch TV or a movie and I can get you clothes from Alexis' room."
"Man, you are desperate for company, aren't you?"
"Well if that gets you to stay, then I am desperate for company and this is going to get worse once Alexis goes to school. You need to find me another friend."
"Oh even if I did, I wouldn't be able to get rid of you. I've tried," she laughed as they walked out of the office and back into the living room.
"Ouch, that hurts."
"You know I'm only kidding. I told you that I've gotten used to you pulling my pigtails as I recall, which classifies as teasing on the playground, so you know what goes around comes around on the playground. Fair game," she smiled at him.
"That's very true. So?" he falls down into the couch.
She sits down on the couch too. "So? You don't honestly think that I'm going to let you buy me a guitar and pay for the lessons too? I mean, really? It's not right."
"Oh my goodness Kate, I wanted to do something nice for you. You are my friend, my partner and I want to do something nice for you. It has no hidden meaning behind it, but when you told me about it today I called Dylan because I figured you hadn't arranged a teacher yet. That's all. The guitar is really the gift. I will let you pay for the lessons if it makes you feel better, but my intentions were to just help you, as a friend."
"I'm sorry. I'm just so stubborn and I'm not good at accepting gifts. I've been told before."
"Well you better get used to it because I love giving them and if we are friends you will be getting more gifts. You know, it isn't about the fact that I can because I have money, it is because I love how happy it makes people and that is all that matters. I've kind of grown up with that and I've been trying to do good things with my money."
"Awe, that's sweet. Okay, well I accept the guitar as my gift, but I'll pay for the lessons. Actually, I was surprised at how well I've picked up on it that I may not need the lessons for long. Thank you though, Castle. I really appreciate it."
"So are you so tired that you want to go to sleep? Do you want me to get you those clothes to change into? I think I am going to change and watch Money Ball. It's supposed to be good."
"Yeah, I'll take those clothes and I'll watch for a little bit, but I'm not going to last. I didn't sleep well last night thinking about that case that we closed last week."
"You too. Phew, I'm glad because that was a rough one to see. That is why I was freaking out about Alexis' internship. I write about murder in my books, but I can leave a lot out of the details and you still get the picture. When a dead body is right in front of you, it's a little tough."
"You know, it is easier talking about it. Just talk to her about it and it's good to get it out. I guess like we are doing. It helps."
"Yeah, maybe you are right. Come on, you can change upstairs in the bathroom." She followed him up the stairs and into Alexis' room.
"Are you sure that Alexis is going to be cool with this?"
"Yeah of course. She loves you." He hands her the clothes and leads her to the bathroom. "I'm going to change and I'll meet you back in the living room."
"Okay."
He ran back downstairs to change and he grabbed a couple blankets from the hallway closet. He moved the coffee table out of the way and he began removing all of the cushions from the couch. She starts walking downstairs in a black t-shirt and black addidas pants that belonged to Alexis.
"Castle, what are you doing?"
"Alexis and I always do this when we watch a movie. You know, I really should just get an air mattress. It probably isn't good for the cushions, right?"
"You are such a kid," she laughed. "Okay, I'm definitely going to fall asleep now. Just promise me you will wake me up, so Alexis and Martha don't find me passed out in the living room. That would be an awful sight."
"Okay, deal. Here's a blanket and a pillow for you. You take those cushions over there. I've got these ones."
She laid down on her cushions and he laid down on his cushions. The lights are out except for the lights coming from the kitchen, they are dim, but it isn't completely dark. He pressed play on the remote. Kate probably last about 20 minutes into the movie and she was out. Castle bounced back and forth watching her sleep and watching the movie. He debated on whether he should wake her now and get her up to the spare room or just let her sleep. He'd hate to wake her and she not being able to sleep afterwards, so he decided to just leave her be. She rolled on her side to face him, still asleep and her right arm fell off the cushion between her cushions and his. He reached for her hand to place back up near her body, but she subconsciously held his hand. He didn't mind, so he just continued to hold her hand and watch the movie. Not long after he was asleep and must have rolled off his cushions towards Kate. At least, that is how Alexis found them, when she came home. She shut off the TV and the amusement center. She smiled down at them while tip toeing around them trying not to wake them. As she stepped past her father, she noticed he was holding her hand. She was shocked. She thought had something changed with Det. Beckett and her Dad and she missed something. Well it could have because she detected a little jealousy coming from Kate in the autopsy room not long ago. She thought about just leaving it alone, but what if her Dad over stepped his boundaries and then Kate would be fighting with him. And she knows he doesn't do well when Kate is mad at him. She decided to wake him. She tapped his shoulder.
"Dad, wake up," she nudged him.
"Hey sweetie," he looked up at her. Still holding Kate's hand and then there was movement coming from Kate. Her eyes opened and Castle and Alexis' eyes were peering at her.
"Hey," Castle spoke first. "I fell asleep too."
"Castle, why are you holding my hand? Hey Alexis."
"Hi, I didn't mean to wake you. I was trying to wake Dad because he'll complain about his back all day tomorrow if he sleeps down here." She's hoping it was quick enough change of subject and a cover for her father's hand holding. He released Kate's hand before Alexis even spoke.
"She's right. Let's go to bed," he held out his hand to help Kate up. She accepted the assistance.
Alexis grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and kissed her father good night. "Good Night, Kate," she said and she made her way up to her room.
"Castle, she seemed fine finding me here sleeping next to you on the floor?" her brows were raised up in question.
"Yeah, why wouldn't she be?"
"I don't know. Forget I said that. I'm still half asleep," she helped him put all the cushions back on the couch and the chairs.
"Kate, at some point we are going to work on you being more direct. We aren't going to start tonight, but we are going to work on it."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Don't play coy with me. You know exactly what I mean. You start to explain something and then back out of it, just like now. But you aren't going to pick a fight with me tonight and walk out. I'm going to show you to your room and we can talk another time."
"Castle?"
"Nope," he grabbed her arm to bring her along. His warm hands against her back, he directed her up the stairs and safely got her to her room. He went inside and turned the light on the nightstand. He sat her down on the bed.
"Castle?"
"Nope, not now. Good night, Kate."
She knew he was right, but she needed to sleep. At this point, all she can give him is that she is working on it. He doesn't look at it as progress right now, but compared to how she used to be. He's lucky that she is in his loft, staying the night and she will be there at breakfast when they wake up. That's huge for her. She'll explain to him tomorrow. She fell right to sleep once she hit the pillow.
(…)
Kate woke up to the smell of breakfast cooking and to her surprise she actually slept pretty well. She had to admit she was worried because she started a pressing conversation with Castle last night she didn't finish it. This would normally be the time that she runs to Dr. Burke to see if he has a special remedy to "fix" her magically. Well it didn't work well and she got the help of her friends, like Esposito last time. She isn't sure who can help her this time. She wishes it was so easy for her to open up to him. She sat up in the bed and thought, 'I trust him, I know he loves me, clearly although he doesn't know I know, I know he is a great man, and he's her silver lining man. So maybe I should just try it again. Try to tell him what I was going to tell him before he left for the Hamptons that summer. Tell him that it is very hard to let on what's on my mind, but tell him I need him.' She was deep in thought when there was a knocked at the door.
"Kate, are you awake?" Alexis asked through the door.
"Yes, you can come in," she smiled as Alexis peeked in through the crack of the door.
"Good Morning, Dad wanted me to check on you. He's cooking breakfast. I'll meet you downstairs," she smiled closing the door leaving Kate in the room.
(...)
"So is Kate up?" Castle asked Alexis as she came in the kitchen to hug her father.
"Yes, Dad. She's fine. You are so cute. You were adorable sleeping on the floor together last night," she decided to tease her Dad a little.
"Oh funny, little one," as he watched Alexis take a seat at the counter to start eating breakfast.
Kate came down the stairs with her clothes she wore yesterday. Even though she was wearing yesterday's clothes, she looked well rested and probably the best sight that Castle has seen in a long time. Yes, he was staring, plus Alexis took the opportunity to slap him back to reality telling him to stop before she noticed.
"Ah, Good Morning, Detective, Ah, I mean, Kate," he fumble his words and there definitely was a flag on this play. 'What the hell is wrong with me?' "Coffee?" as he sat the mug on the counter so she could take a seat next to Alexis.
"Yes, please. And bring on my scrambled eggs because I know you have them hiding over there somewhere," she smiled at the fact that she was able to joke before having caffeine in her. She tried to look past him at the stove to make sure she was right.
"Yep, coming right up," he smiled, sat his coffee mug down, spun around to fill her plate with her eggs. Her eggs; the ones he made just for her. Oh he's got it bad and is in deep.
He sat the plate down in front of her and her smile beamed back at him. Alexis' phone rings while she watching their intense gaze. She answers, "Castle. Yes, Dr. Parish, oh Lanie, right. Ok, a body. Address? Ok great. Be there in 20." She hangs up and both Kate and her Dad are staring at her.
"There's a body. That was Lanie, right?"
"Castle? You answer your phone as Castle now. Castle is me," he shrugs and pouts looking at Beckett for sympathy.
"Yes, there's a body, so I gotta go. Dad," she goes over to kiss him on the cheek and he is still pouting while leaning on the counter. 'This really is ruining the unit cohesion and coming a little close to home for his liking.' "Bye Kate"
"Bye Alexis," she waited for her to leave then, "Castle, let's go. Get dressed. Actually wait? Oh God, do you think Alexis will tell Lanie that I spent the night here," Kate looked at him in shock as she went to grab her coat from the closet and put her shoes on.
"Yes, she will probably tell her. But what's the big deal? It wasn't like that," he said.
"Well you and I both know that Lanie won't look it like that. I'm going to head to my place to change. When they call me with an address, I'll call you with the address. I just think it is better if we don't show up together."
"I don't know, Kate. Sometimes that makes it worse, but as you wish," she makes her way to the door. "See you later," he says as he closes the door.
(…)
Kate gets out of her Crown Vic and walks up to the crime scene. She sees Lanie filling out a report and Esposito meets her at the crime scene tape.
"Yo Beckett, nice of you to show up…where's Castle?," Esposito asks.
"He's coming. I just called him and he wasn't ready, so I came straight here," she replied.
"Uh huh, sure," he looked at her as if he knew something else. Kate walked passed him and dismissed his little look and comment.
"Hey Lanie, who do we got here?" she asked the medical examiner.
"Hey, where's your long lost puppy? Or should I say breakfast maker?" she smiled at Kate.
Lanie!" sharp and short, as if under her breath because she didn't want anyone to hear.
"What?"
"I'll talk to you later, but not here, please," and she rolled her eyes in Alexis' direction. Alexis wasn't paying attention to the conversation and she wanted to keep it that way.
"Ok, we've got multiple GSW at close range and Ryan has her ID and address."
"Ok, thank you. Now was that so hard."
(…)
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"Hey, I'm just waiting for my partner to call me with an address," he smiled. "You forgot to call me."
"Castle, I didn't forget to call you. Alexis did tell Lanie, who told Esposito and Ryan, that I spent the night at your place last night, so you can thank me for sparing you the humiliation."
"Ah, I need to talk to her. Do you want me to talk to her?"
"I don't know, Castle. I'm going to talk to Lanie later to clear it up. But in the meantime, we've got a murder to solve, so let me fill you in. Oh and beware, there will be comments from the boys. They know too," he looked over his shoulder in their direction, but they weren't looking their way.
"Okay. Good to know. It looks like it is us against the world."