Counting the Ways of Love
Summary: (Sess/older Rin ONESHOT) Sesshomaru enumerating the reasons of his profound feelings for the young human in his charge as he experienced the finer points of love and care for another individual. A tribute to Rumiko Takahashi for exploring and revealing a deeper, multilayered, multifaceted Sesshomaru that fandom always KNEW he possessed (Manga episodes #468/469/470/471 and hopefully more!) and to all the Sess/older Rin supporters I know who are out there. ! YEAH to us !
Contains slight language and explicitness ……. so you've been warned.
Disclaimer: Do not own Inuyasha.
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Sesshomaru contemplated in silent wonder while shifting his weight to not crush the silky soft female form beneath him. His breathing caught between gritted teeth and his thin nostrils flared briefly at the frisson of pleasure pulsing through his entire body with that small movement. He was amazed anew at the way she was so attuned to him –-- actually --- the way they were attuned to each other.
Really, there was only a small handful of ways in which he could attempt to describe why he loved this girl.
Many had deemed her unworthy both in looks and in social standing when pitted against other demonesses who had vied for the attention of her regal lord.
But to Sesshomaru, the sheer life radiating from the girl and joy barely contained inside the slight frame astounded the lord many times at her undaunted capacity for happiness despite her less than stellar life. Losing her parents so tragically young and abandoned by the people who knew her were enough to turn a person into a raving, senseless lunatic. But somehow, she had risen above those crises and kept her equanimity. Perhaps no one knew better than he of the hardships in her life.
Hell, being with him throughout the years had brought even greater dangers to the human girl. Indeed, on several occasions in their joint past, she had been used like a mere puppet by his foes who thought they could exploit her to destroy the Taiyoukai.
But without much fanfare and even fewer words, he had always followed whenever she called and destroyed those who dared touch her.
Everything he possessed -- from his deadly claws to the mystical swords firmly secured about his waist -- was aimed at serving her and keeping her safe from harm.
Of course, trials and tribulations had compounded in her life but the girl had chosen to stay with him in spite of it and he could not, did not deny her.
No brittle artifice, no cloying falsity existed in those fragile bones. Clear bright eyes and smooth, sun-kissed skin seemed to be all that were needed to bring the most powerful Taiyoukai to his proverbial knees. Sesshomaru was bleakly amused when he realized his penchant for her touch, sight and scent started fairly early on after they first met. He had viciously tamped down his craving to know her in every sense of the word as a courtesy to her tender age. She was not ready either physically or psychologically to take on the tremendous task as the Lady of the West. So, he had carefully nurtured his wildflower and watched it blossomed to full potential. It was just as well that Sesshomaru, the consummate strategist, was a master at the game of waiting.
She was his weakness.
It was an undeniable truth. It had vexed him at times that she was initially totally unaware of her hold over him. In his most tempted and darkest moments, his heart had yearned to rip that innocent veil from her eyes and subject her completely to the ruthlessness of youkai. Enough to frighten her to leave him of her own accord so that he could also gain freedom from his slight burden. Such a coward, he had mocked himself in silence. But as the feral red tide receded from his vision and mind, he realized he could no more hurt her than slit his own throat and thus had yielded, albeit reluctantly, to the hands of Fate in this one small circumstance.
Although Fate had unkindly decided to intervene and converged both human and youkai's paths, but he, Sesshomaru, will dictate the outcome of their shared, predestined life. He trusted no one, not even the Fates, in this matter of priority to mold and shape his desire.
So it was also with unbridled pleasure that Sesshomaru acknowledged his sole responsibility in awakening the sleeping beauty to the ways of love. She was his and he alone deserved that privilege. Untutored as she was, he knew that she already adored him ever since that day in the glade when he growled at her to keep her distance. Perhaps not on the level he desired as yet, but it was inevitable that her final destination was to be by his side and in his arms.
To her, he epitomized safe harbor despite the dangers that lurked about her just by being with him. Although the lord never expressed his emotions, the girl learnt through the years to decipher his heart by the changing color of his eyes, in the subtle way the finely shaped eyebrows lift or lower in consternation, and in the almost undetectable quirk at the corner of normally immobile lips when he was highly amused.
She tugged at his heartstring like an artist stroking lovingly over a blank canvas and lifting it to vivid life from its mundane existence with the brilliance of her color palette. He only knew that every fibre of his being was instinctively wired and finely tuned to her frequency that nothing about her escaped his attention. Despite their oil-and-water personalities that normally refused to mesh according to the physical laws of nature, that lone element of love melded and twined them together so tightly that he could not tell where he ended and where she began.
The girl balanced him so well.
Her exuberance to his calmness, her enthusiasm to his careful demeanor, her gentleness to his ruthlessness, her soft womanly curves to his hard frame.
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(Divider to present time)
He loved the feel of her.
He looked down at the face flushed in the throes of passion below him, watched as she held his gaze fearlessly and lovingly. Dark, velvety brown eyes stared at him, daring him to try and limit the infinite measure of her feelings for him.
Sesshomaru softly raked a clawed hand from her fragile collarbone to her hips, his hand faithfully following the dips and hollows of her slender body. It traveled further down to the point where they were currently joined and he could feel her flesh leaping with joy from his fiery touch as he stroked lovingly the downy curls that hid her womanhood.
So responsive.
In playful retaliation, her own fingertips reached out to touch the lean bare chest wonderingly. Sesshomaru felt his loins tightened when her lips followed and opened over one hardened male nipple and tweaked it between her small teeth. Tongue and teeth tussled and nipped at the flat disk, evoking a gratuitous, heated sensation that threatened to boil over inside the demon lord before she repeated that same chore to its counterpart while all the more encouraged by the low, husky groans emitted from her lord.
"..Rin…" His voice uncharacteristically broke slightly from its normal baritone. His body thrummed with such intense pleasure as she built up the hunger in him.
It was always like this, this white heat that rendered him soulless and mindless to blindly follow wherever she led him.
No one had ever loved him so much. Loved him for he who was. Not for any material gains they could have received from him, not for any prestige he could have bestowed as such were his rights as the high lord.
Just him. Only him.
Sesshomaru knew he was not a lovable creature; he never claimed to be either in words or in deeds. His battle victories asserted absolute that declaration. He never pretended that he wanted to be liked by anyone. He didn't give a damn. As long as he achieved his goals and did things his ways, the whole world could go to hell.
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(Divider to present time)
Sesshomaru returned from his reverie once again by the feel of slender fingers gliding delicately from his shoulders down his spine and causing a fine sheen of sweat to bead on his forehead and dampen his bangs. Sensuous shivers racked through his frame, humbling him at the ardent devotion evident in the girl's every gesture.
It was too much….She was too much.
He closed his eyes momentarily, savoring her heat that was wrapped around him like a tight, wet fist and was startled anew at how a simple girl could take him over the edge so easily. Those same fingers smoothed across his tapered hips before they palmed and gently squeezed his buttocks encouraging him to completely and irrevocably bind her to him again. Her long limbs locked around his hips securely and she thrust up to meet him, her breathing raspy and her soft curves rocked provocatively against him. Gasping his need for her, Sesshomaru helplessly responded to her entreaty, his tense muscles flexed as he drove harder and harder into her with his head thrown back while the silvery strands curtained and shielded them in their own private world.
As much as he felt that burning possessiveness of Rin, he was sure it was mutual with her. When she became his mate, it was as if her confidence gained an even surer foothold as she staked her claim on him.
The Lady of the West was not a pushover by any stretch of the imagination.
Those jealous demonesses who had failed to capture her husband's attention no longer marveled at the reason why he had given it to his Lady Rin. Her indomitable spirit (A/N: why……that sounds just like this author's penname ? shameless plug here ….hehehe) emanated from deep within the girl's soul and its power was amplified by both the mental and physical bonds she shared with the Taiyoukai who had stood unwavering beside her.
Amber pools suddenly snapped open at her innocent boldness and she blushed at the sheer lust yet underwritten with love in those golden eyes as he surged deeper and stronger into her warmth while raising himself on his elbows to gain greater leverage. Relentless, the girl followed him, wrapping delicate arms around his neck, her lips seeking the strong shelf of his jaw, her tongue soothing the corded muscle that strained against her, as though she could empathize with the feelings that were wreaking havoc in him. The howling heat in his mind migrated to his loins where they craved to utterly take over her. To pound out the very devil chasing his heels, to absorb her into his very essence, and to love her as though there were no guarantees of tomorrow. Somewhere in the back of his throat, an animalistic moan involuntarily guttered past his teeth as he felt soft lips pressing feverish kisses along the pale skin of his neck.
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He loved the sight of her.
She grew up in front of his very eyes. A rambunctious child had given way to a more discerning young lady of nineteen. Despite her still tender years compared to his infinite soul, she possessed such endless wisdom that he was so quietly and foolishly proud of this woman. Childish laughter had become gentler but lost none of its warmth. The endless prattle had become more insightful as she learned to assess better the world around her while her lord mentored and guided those budding senses. That didn't mean she lost her spontaneity for life. It had been a secret source of his silent amusement to watch her behaviors and attitudes matured through their different phases. It certainly baffled their toad servant profoundly.
Poor Jaken. He was not only outstripped by her physical growth but also by her sharp intellect in just a handful of years after the toad's lord inexplicably gained the last member to their group. Even more mysterious to Jaken was that Lord Sesshomaru had done absolutely nothing by deed or word to dissuade her from tagging along. Such was the way of the upper class, Jaken had decided a long time ago. The imp was not even pretending to understand his liege's peculiarities. As time passed, even Jaken found himself wrapped unknowingly around her tiny fingers. Sesshomaru fully understood the reasons Jaken chose to serve him. But he was certain Jaken would never admit out loud his own strange allegiance to the girl. Perhaps the toad sensed even way back then that she meant something special to his lord.
Something secretly treasured. Something so fiercely protected.
Taking on breath and life, she was a physical manifestation of Sesshomaru's deepest desire. He did not even realize that he had harbored such dreams of self-contentment and happiness until they met. It was as if his vague concepts of peace and love suddenly materialized in the form of the human child he had encountered unexpectedly in the woods twelve summers ago.
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(Divider to present time)
Her body slick with sweat as she writhed in pleasure under him. The soft firm swell of young breasts heaved erratically as she kept pace with the passionate rhythm he had created for them. He heard her chant his name like a broken rhapsody when he leaned down and captured one rose-tipped nipple in his mouth while the other globe was encircled and smoothed by a large, warm palm. His dangerous claws were carefully sheathed as a thumb and forefinger teased hardily at the crowning glory of that luscious mound until it distended and hardened in excitement. The girl arched her body up, eagerly offering herself like a sacrificial lamb to the handsome god above her. Her hands wounding tightly in the silver strands as she pulled his mouth ever closer still to her. Not to be outdone, his tongue and fangs greedily tugged and pulled the bud as he hungrily suckled the fleshy mound. She tasted like nectar. He laved sweet attention to her breast before switching to the other breast after a while and paid it the same homage that its twin sister received. Every intake of her warm flesh into his waiting mouth, he could feel a corresponding arch of her pelvis seeking passionate relief as it slapped wetly and grinded so deeply into his own length.
It was always like this with her. Only with her.
The demon lord growled low in his throat and clutched her tighter still. He could feel the white heat shimmering just beneath his eyelids.
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He loved the mind of her.
The curiosity of a young child became a genuine interest to learn more of his world as she grew older. She had adapted herself to his realm most becomingly and he encouraged her voracious appetite to educate herself in the youkai ways. Rin had never wanted to bring shame to her lord even as a young child. She was a devoted servant, willing to take on any chores were he to ask of her. Not that he ever put her in any menial tasks. There was something strangely unsettling seeing her hands reddened and chafed from physical labor that she did without his permission when they first returned to the palace. Ever since then, he forbade her from those duties and instructed her to concentrate on broadening her mind and developing her defensive skills. Visitors to the palace, normally expecting to see an uncouth, dirty little enfant running amok like her barbaric humankind, were often surprised to find poise and grace in the lord's young ward. Her behavior and manner at court were impeccable. There was no room to find fault since Rin worked so hard to ensure there were none.
Nevertheless, when the visitors left, the demon lord could hear an almost audible sigh of relief from the young girl as she abandoned heavy court dresses with glee for the simpler kimonos she so favored while meandering through her flower gardens barefoot and soaking in the lovely sun. Despite her occasional shedding of formal court life, Sesshomaru came to value his silent sounding board when he was puzzled especially by the illogic of the humans residing near his lands. Rin was able to show him that perspective and in doing that, had managed to stay his wrath on several ningen villages. Because she was raised in both worlds, Rin's perception was highly appreciated. He also secretly admired her integrity. Unbeknownst to her, the lord found himself observing her more often when she showed signs of enthusiasm in warfare strategy and economic expansion. He eventually tested her grasp on these concepts and found himself greatly intrigued by the depth of her knowledge that their private discussions sometimes lasted well into the early morning. Sesshomaru now recognized that he had opened yet another door to his inner sanctum and allowed this little human to breach his solitude where none had been allowed access.
She was not afraid to form opinions and had never been intimidated by his status. Sesshomaru was, first and foremost, an intellectual warrior despite his physical beauty. Their verbal debates and spars were rather exhilarating for both parties although he was much better versed in keeping his enthusiasm of her concealed from her and the world. He had never found someone who would dare speak plainly to him and he doubted if he ever will again. To this day, he would not have hesitated to say that she had widened his eyes to really notice her, to find her even more desirable as she captivated him with her boldness and her lively mind.
His possessiveness of her had reached a whole new level.
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He loved the sound of her.
He sought her voice and her face every morning. When she was much younger, he always enjoyed the peace she offered him while sheltering her in the crook of his arms as thunderstorms raged on around them. Her contentment in knowing she was safe transmitted to the larger, warmer body next to hers and he gained her serenity as well. Now that she was older and his mate, her happiness increased a thousand-fold.
To him, the sun rose and set on those lovely features and that lilting sing-song voice. Sesshomaru tended to grow restless if he were denied either for any length of time. He looked to her voice to soothe his frayed mind when he had enough dealing with court business or when Jaken droned on incessantly. His lady always had the foresight to shoo the imp away before her mate gave in to his recalcitrant desire and use the green imp as his personal bulls-eye target practice.
Rin always teased her lord by noting that she could not possibly fall into harm with him hovering so closely. Even in sleep, Sesshomaru's will did not alter. Lean body wielded her to him, their breath co-mingling and even the shadow of darkness could not find a resting place in the couple's embrace.
But right now, right now when her voice was filled with ecstasy as she whimpered her need for him, as she thrashed and undulated her hips restlessly underneath his while cradling him between her slender thighs, as her moans were swallowed up by his greedy tongue, he knew why he loved the sound of her.
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(Divider to present time)
He loved the scent of her.
Firmly clasped as he was currently between her silken thighs, Sesshomaru never thought her brand of imprisonment would feel so much like a haven to him. Nightly, Rin opened up to him, welcoming and embracing him with her soft arms and gentle eyes, washing away the harshness of the day with her love, and sheathing him in her moist warmth as they demonstrated their mutual love for each other. When he first took her as his mate two years earlier, the demon world was rocked to its foundation. To see the InuTaisho's heir following his father's footsteps was disquieting for most demons. But they figured that her natural lifespan was just but a tiny dot on the vast immortal plain of the dog lord's life; they believed he could have his fun for a short time.
Not that they quietly acquiesced to his decision.
Far from it.
Since Sesshomaru was determined to maintain his dominance, challengers were ruthlessly quelled and demolished. Battles and bloodshed were waged in her name before Sesshomaru completely and unequivocally claimed his reward. The reward which he had denied himself for far too long.
He never ever wanted to be free from this bondage.
His desire to be intimate with her on every level sometimes frightened him in its intensity. Sesshomaru sighed as he breathed in the beautiful fragrance of his mate. Her normally, soft floral scent now had an added layer of his branding. With his scent so ingrained and imbedded into her skin, creatures far and wide naturally gave her a very, very wide berth. That pleased the demon lord to no end. There was nothing better in this world than having his scent etched so deeply all over this girl, imprinting her indelibly as his that no one could refute or challenge his ownership. Not many relished the thought of facing an even deadlier Sesshomaru especially if he felt his mate was being threatened in the slightest.
And when her personal safety was thought to be breached, Sesshomaru spared no one.
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(Divider to present time)
His blood pounded harshly throughout his body knowing that with every thrust, every sweat-slicked smack of lean hips against the soft tender under-belly of the girl, he was imparting a slice of his soul into her keeping.
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As for Rin, what did she think of her beloved lord?
She had always been obvious in her affection for him, never failing to remind him of his personal importance to her heart's well-being.
Once tapped, Sesshomaru's capability for loving her was unfettered. It was as if a dam of repressed emotions was finally broken wide open leaving nothing in its torrential path to freedom.
But all those years of his had to be unlearned and unpracticed. The lord still presented an impassive face to all but in the intimacy of her embrace, that outer shell dropped away and he was like putty in her hands. Rin was extremely humbled as she slowly realized just how much her lord had sacrificed for her sake.
In return, she taught him to feel and encouraged him to communicate more often through touching. His passion for her never lacked gentleness. Sesshomaru was too sensitive to her human needs to be otherwise.
This was what she had dreamed of for so long. To be this close to the one she loved so dearly.
Her Sesshomaru.
Moon-kissed hair flowed like fine silk through her fingers. Molten, golden eyes that centered always on her. Strong heart, mind and body worked in perfect unison to protect her but also loved her so irrevocably and without reservation. She treasured the feeling of being cosseted and cherished as his muscular body utterly covered her smaller one without leaving space for a breath. Her lord's body emitted such heat being a dog demon and his fervor cocooned her until Rin could not think of anything else.
As she was riveted in his mind, he also became her universe.
She wrapped her arms tightly around him, loving the heat and strength that seeped from his very pores. His lips left hers to trace along the curve of her jaw. She quivered as they moved down the graceful arc of her throat to the shallow dip where slender neck met fragile shoulder. Sharp fangs marked her all over again allowing him a small taste of her essence before his warm tongue lapped and sealed the tiny wound. For every joy he brought her, Rin always found a way to reward his devotion.
A small price to pay to feel a prickling graze but the reward was always so overwhelming.
Whispered words of love and actions backing up those same words calmed her fear of abandonment or being unloved. He would risk his own life, his own soul to ensure her continued existence.
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(Divider to present time)
Completely boneless, Rin descended from her own zenith at the height of heaven yet she could still feel the remnant of her orgasm clutched and spasmed, relentlessly contracting around his length inside her. She basked in the joy of being entirely immersed and invincible in his love.
Rin felt rather than heard the low rumbling of hot breath on her neck and the tremors vibrating through her lord's body. Silvery hair clung damply to their sweat-slicked limbs and twined with her own black locks. His movement had become more frenzied, more frantic.
Her Sesshomaru was only moments away….
It was not long before she felt his body stiffened and with a sharp growl and a heaving thrust from pale, strong hips, Rin felt his love encompassed and warmed her as he helplessly and shudderingly collapsed on top of her, her name on his lips.
Rin wrapped her arms tightly around him and found peace.
The End
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(A/N: I hope you like it enough to leave me reviews or pointers. My muse slapped me on the side of my head when I was inexplicably thinking about Elizabeth Browning's "…How Do I Love Thee, Let Me Count the Ways…" although his ways were a little more explicit and steamy…LOL.
Please forgive any errors. They were absolutely unintentional!
This piece was intended to help me find my way out of my current writer's block on "RML" as it was gasping for air like a fish out of water...yup…that bad! But I do intend to finish it).
Dee