The Ultimate Date of Doom

Chapter 1: A plan is unveiled

            Zim walked into his house, scowling, reaching up and pulling the remainder of the trash off of his head, a banana peel. "Gir!" He called, closing the door behind him. "Gir come here!"

            "Yes my master." The small robot snapped to immediate attention, its eyes a menacing red. Then they dimmed down to green, "Wee-ooh!" The robot waved it's hand in front of it's nose, "You smeee~ll!"

            "Those infernal humans ganged up on me and then threw me into a waste disposal unit!" He said, gripping his hands into fists, scowling at the evil memory of the incident. How horrible it had been, they had been taking a political studies class, a first and for the first time…there were things Zim had wanted to know, after all, he should know the system if he wanted to someday rule the world. His questions had gone on, and the time ender bell had rung, but his questions were not done yet, and the teacher wouldn't let the others go until she was done. Then, horror upon horror, he had gone into the playground afterwards and they had all run to attack him like the animals those humans were.

            "They chucked you in the trash can?!" Gir said in disbelief, a grin on his face. "Cool!"

            "But fear not," A shadow fell across his lime green alien skin, "for when doom comes upon the planet…I will dispose of them in the greatest waste disposal unit of all time! THERE WILL BE DOOM FOR ALL OF THEM!" He began to laugh at the thought of the screaming children being hurled into a giant dumpster by a robot which he, Zim, controlled.

            "I'm gonna sing the Doom son-"

            "Gir!!"

            "Doom de-doom doom doom!"

            "Gir!"

            "Doom! Doom! Doom! Doom!"

            "Gir!"

            "GIR I YOUR MASTER COMMAND YOU TO STOP!"

            "Yes my master!" Gir, snapped into red mode. His eyes and features all glowing red, and evil looking. Then he grinned, once again, turning back to green. "Dooooooo-"

            "GIR!!!!!" Zim scowled, as the little robot began to do a wild techno dance, all the while chanting, "Doom. Doom. Doom. Doom."  "One day, I will find out what is wrong with that robot…" He muttered to himself, then he cleared his throat, and announced loudly, "Gir, take me to the base!"

            "Dooo~ooom!"

            "GIR!"

***

            Downstairs, at the computer, Zim stood, his eyes watching as the scene replayed itself on the monitor. "When I am the leader of this world…" He whispered, as the on screen children lifted him above their head, chanting, "Dunk him, Dunk him, Dunk him!". "I will destroy them all…"

            "Master, can I ask a question?" Gir chanted, suddenly looking up from the game he had been playing on the floor. "Pleeeee~ase."

            "Very well, what?"

            "Pleeeeeeeasse?"

            "What!?"

            "How are you going to be leader of the world when nobody likes you."

            Zim blinked at the monitor, where he had rolled at the trash can, then back at Gir. "What do you mean, 'Nobody likes you'."

            "Nothing at all…" Gir said, shaking his head in a mock gesture. "It's just that, they throw you in the trash, because they hate you, because you're a looooser."

            "Loser? What does this loser mean?" He scowled, then turned to the monitors, "Computer! Look up the world 'Loser'."

            The screen flashed, showing a grid, 'Searching: Loser'. Then all of a sudden it popped up, 'Loser.' The computer announced in it's mechanical voice 'Loser, A person or thing destined for failure. A person or thing that loses. Loser.'

            "Failure? I am not destined for failure…" Zim said, falling to his knees, staring at his gloves in disbelief.  "I am ZIM! I cannot fail my mission…" He frowned, looking annoyed. "Gir…how can I not be this 'loser'. Tell me!"

            Gir frowned, and then grabbed his mechanical feet, causing him to fall over. Zim blinked. "I really hope you meant to do that, Gir." He said very slowly, scowling at him. "Because if not…" He shook his head, vowing at that moment to see what was wrong with the robot as soon as he stopped being 'a loser' or whatever it was called. He shivered involuntarily.  "Gir! Tell me at once!"

            Gir stood up, and then nodded his head. "Okey-dokey." Then he took a deep breath, or at least what Zim considered to be a deep breath, since his robot didn't at least he didn't think he did, breathe. "On Beverly Hills 90000, there was this girl named Carmen, and she was a looooser, but then she started to date the most popular guy in school, and she wasn't a looooser anymore but she was popular and everybody loves her now! I love her too." 

            "So your saying, to become…'popular', I have to date the most popular girl in school…"

            "Nope. Most popular guy."

            "Gir."

            "Yes?"

            "Go watch TV upstairs now."

            "Woooo-hoooo!"

***

            Zim rubbed his chin, staring at the monitor's, each displaying a girl from his class. All very popular.  "Hmm…perhaps the one with the purple colored hair," He glanced at the monitor which displayed, the girl with the purple spiky hair held back by a head band.  "Or perhaps the one dressed like a church woman…" An image with nun-girl popped up, he rubbed his chin, "But which would be the most convenient," then one of the monitor's paused in front of him. The one of the girl, with purple hair, not the one with the one with a headband but a different one, her eyes were only slits as she narrowed them in the picture, she was wearing a black dress, with a skulls and crossbones on the front, and purple striped tights, and high black boots.

 "G~az…" he read aloud, the name on the side, frowning to himself. "Who is this Gaz Membrane…"

A/N: R&R, Tell me what's good, what's bad, or if I should continue. Thanx.