Chapter 1 : Somewhere I'd Rather Not Be

I've decided to do a proper rewrite of the story beginning with fleshing out the chapter a little bit more and giving it some extra legs to entice people. As I've said before, the previous chapter was a test to see how my writing held up in canon. Now that I have that locked down, this one will be a proper chapter. Now, on to the show…

You know how they say, "Be careful what you wish for?"

They were right. Wishes are like a double-edged sword. They sound fun in theory but in practice, they are wrought with responsibility and consequences practically none of us could pick up on when we were just children. I think it's because our young minds are still naïve and so innocent that we remain blind to the true way of the world until much later in life.

Perhaps I should provide some context to this. I was one of those kids. You know those kids. The ones you see getting their lunch money stolen, humiliated repeatedly in front of their peers, having pranks pulled on you. On the first day no less! What's even worse was the fact that even the geeky and nerdy kids who could potentially sympathize with my plight on some level also shunned me from their social circles. I was basically a social pariah during my years in high-school. It would have been much worse had I not had my two siblings standing by my side.

Ah, yes. My older brother Matthew and my younger sister Erin have been the cornerstones of my life from our childhood years to the time of our graduation from the hell that is high school. We were a unique trio, due in no small part to our inherent bond with one another and the fact that both were willing to take a popularity hit by associating with me when so many others would not. Sure, we've had our ups and downs but we care for one another in a way few other families could claim to. Even still, it was quite lonely those formative years, changing me from a easy, outgoing kid into a lonely, shy introvert who spent hours in his room rather than with his family. That's when I came across the video game series known as Mass Effect.

I still remember my 15th birthday when my gaming-addicted uncle came to the house one day with the game wrapped up in the kind of wrapping paper you could easily find down at the local store, topped off with a festive ribbon to boot. As soon as the disc popped into the console and the words flashed upon the screen right in front of me, I knew I was hooked. I spent hours on end that year customizing my Shepard and creating my own mark in the world, albeit a virtual one. Even my siblings joined in on the fun. I still picture Erin going instantly for the face punch when dealing with that awful reporter or when Matthew joked during one of… ahem… 'love' scenes that he was going to close the deal when he was old enough. Not to say that they joined my activities. Matthew was more into sports than I was and there were a lot of nights when Mom would chastise us for turning their house into a Nazi gas chamber with our foul-smelling odour. And don't get me started on Erin's tea parties when she was a young kid. Quick tip though, don't walk outside before you've cleaned your face after one of those parties. I swore that every neighbor who stared at me thought that I had gone into an awkward phase where I started looking goth-like.

This addiction eventually formed over the course of the three games, launching my interest and passion into the gaming universe proper. Since then, I've also had a chance to flex my writing muscles and create some fanfictions of my own to share my vision with the rest of the world and to see what stories could result from other people as well. It became my secondary addiction, losing myself in the stories created by people like claihm solais, DelVarO, GIRLIKESTACOS and many more. It was that point that I myself wondered; what would it be like to live in such a rich universe?

If only I had been wiser…

It was the year 2013 by this point. Matthew was busy overseas, working on his latest project as an architect for one of the biggest firms around. Erin had only just finished high school recently, which was a fantastic ceremony by the way, particularly her valedictorian speech about facing the harsh realities of our ever-changing world. I on the other hand have only brushed the surface of college life, going on my second year. In addition to that, I took a part-time job at a local convenience store in order to do my part to ease the financial burdens our family faced in the wake of the economy downsizing. It was an arduous task but one I diligently kept to for the sake of my family. It was moving on into the evening one day and I was walking home from another long day of both school and work, my arms loaded with papers and notes. To say I was exhausted at that point would be a gross understatement. As I finally sighted my house in the distance, my face turned its frown upside down at the thought of finally being back in the company of my loving family. That frown quickly returned when I tripped over something and fell face first on the grassy lawn of my neighbor. Cursing in pain, I rubbed my stomach to ease the pain when my eyes caught a glimpse of something purple in the crevices of my vision. Sitting inconspicuously in the middle of the garden was a small purplish-pink crystal which shimmered in the dimming rays of the sunset across the night sky. My curiosity piqued, I bent down to touch the crystal myself, ignoring the risks of toying with the unknown.

At my touch, the crystal started to shake and rattle in place, the pink hues slowly dissolving and replaced instead with a white, blazing glow that blindsided me, causing me to hold my arms up to my face to block the harmful rays from my sight. It was only when I felt that same energy wash over me that I realized it was an actual crystal of Kronostyl-2, a substance I had used countless times in my previous works. Almost immediately, I knew where this was going. The crystal glowed brighter and brighter till finally it shattered into millions of tiny fragments, covering the air around in possibly lethal projectiles. It just so happened I was in the blast zone. The fragments dug deep into my flesh like a knife through butter, embedding itself into the palms of my hands and drawing a gushing fountain of blood. As I screamed lously, piercing the silence, clutching my bloodied hands in agonizing pain, my eyes fell upon another phenomenon copied detail by painstaking detail from my work.

A massive black hole with a purple hue emerged from out of nowhere and began sucking everything not properly tethered to the ground. First, the mailbox ripped itself from the ground and flew in a dizzying pattern into the gaping maw, lost forever to its vast emptiness. Next were the gnomes and the pink flamingoes our neighbors thought made the lawn look cool and unique. I was not sad to see those tacky ornaments from the 1960s go. In my opinion, those things just looked downright creepy every time I passed it by on my regular commute. Inevitably, gravity failed to keep me grounded and only an instinctive grab of the corners of the pavement saved my hide for the moment. My feet left the ground and flayed whimsically behind me while my blood-soaked fingers would not yield its foothold on the pavement, desperately trying to hang on. All of a sudden, fate decided the final blow when a minivan was dragged into the wormhole and took me along for the ride by slamming headfirst into my helpless body. With a final scream, I fell deeper and deeper into the wormhole till its entrance no longer held court in my vision. My descent was complete. Only the destination remained unclear. Wherever it was, it could not be good. My eyes struggled to remain open, but whatever power that resided over this occurrence snapped them shut, closing me off from the world and sending my mind into oblivion.

"Hey…" came a concerned male voice.

"Hey! Are you okay, pal?" His words gained clarity with each passing second but the prone form refused to make any sort of movement.

"Buddy? You still alive in there?" His voice became more forceful, more brutal which finally shook Rip-Van Winkle from his eternal slumber.

"Ahhhh!" I screamed as I thrust my eyes open. I flapped my extremities back and forth in extreme terror, only to feel two hands holding me down and doing its very best to calm me down.

"Easy there, kiddo. You had me worried for a minute there." His soothing tone put me at ease and I relented my maniacal motions, allowing my eyes to take stock of the situation. A face stared back at me. It was human at least, which gave me relief beyond words. He looked to be a wizened elderly citizen, long past his prime and perhaps bristling with sagely advice. For an old guy, he sure seemed to know the youngster slang.

"Thanks, Mr…" I muttered incoherently, still recovering from the shock. Luckily, the man understood my ramblings.

"Call me Larry. Everyone does." Larry smiled as he helped me back on my feet.

"Alright, Larry." I mused, grateful for his aid.

"You want to tell me what happened to you? When I found you in the alley, you were right passed out." He queried. Honestly, I didn't know what to tell him. What was I supposed to say anyway? I was transported here by some magical crystal that I wrote about? Yeah, that'll go over soooo well…

"I…." I opened my mouth to speak, only for my eyes to finally grasp the extent of my surroundings.

"What in the…." I exclaimed in both horror and awe at the same time. Peering back before me behind Larry was a sight I'd seen a million times on my TV and on YouTube. The Presidium looked awe-inspiring compared to its portrayal in the game. In the middle of the entire plaza stood a proud, mini-mass relay atop a golden pedestal. Passer-bys looked upon during their walks across the marble-white gantry ways connecting two sides to one another. Its barrier, a pure clean stream of water looked inviting enough to drink from. On the floor above my current position was a mass of stores dealing in various products ranging from care products, food and of course weapons. Everything just looked so futuristic and realistic to the point that I considered that I was just dreaming. One quick pinch on my cheek was enough pain to convince me that this in fact wasn't some really creepy dream.

"What the fuck!? Where the hell am I?" I swore loudly, arousing the suspicions of Larry.

"You hit your head or something, kid? You're on the Citadel." He spoke incredulously, disbelieving the notion that no-one has never heard of the Citadel before. Even the toddlers back on Earth knew about this…

"But that can't be right… I can't…" I stuttered, the words failing to catch in my mouth. It was this I came to a realization. My wish came true. I'm here in the world of Mass Effect. Craning to salvage what little credibility I had left, I instantly made up a thin cover story, just enough to gather intel on my surroundings.

"I'm supposed to be on Earth. I'm not supposed to be here." I wept convincingly, a mixture of both the truth and a lie.

"You must have run afoul of someone powerful if you got dumped in an alley on the Citadel. Looks like they did a crap job too." He surmised, stroking his white hairy chin. His finger was jabbing right at my hands, which were by this point covered in dried blood and scabs. I followed along, giving a short snort at his comment.

"Heh… Yeah, I guess they did."

"Listen, come with me. I got something to show you." He whispered in my ear with a hushed tone. Seeing as how I had no other point of reference or any game plan, it was as good as it was going to get…

"Lead on, old man." I waved my hand forth, eliciting a stifled chuckle from the elderly Samaritan. With that, my feet dragged behind his and I was led to an uncertain future in an uncertain world.

It took all of ten minutes and a god-forsaken extended elevator ride to reach our intended destination. For an old man, Larry sure seemed to walk quite fast. While I could keep up with his pace, I found myself quite weary after we arrived at a nearby store. Larry quickly dragged me aside, away from prying eyes or ears.

"Go into the shop and ask for ol' Larry's equipment. They'll give to ya." He ordered. My suspicions were still firmly in check but I decided to play along in any case. I strolled casually into the store and was greeted by a salarian shopkeeper. Now it must be said that the games do no justice to the actual thing. His weird-like head felt more like the head of aliens from any number of movies. The face matched more reptilian features, reminiscent of frogs back home. The wide eyes looked dead set on peering into my soul. Topping this off was their unnaturally skinny body, legs and arms like fragile wooden branches attached to an equally thin tree on a diet. With a slight trepidation in both physical movement and speech patterns, I approached the counter.

"Uh…hello?" I tentatively spoke.

"Oh, hello there. I didn't see you walk in. What can I do for you?" he spoke in perfect English. I was in shock. I thought I was supposed to have those translator programs and I wasn't exactly packing an omni-tool. So it was to my surprise when I reached out to my right hand and saw the familiar shimmer of orange wrap itself around my wrist and formed a see-through computer with surprising solidity. Where in the world did I get that?

"I…uhh…. I am here to pick up Mr. Larry's procurements." I said, fumbling at first due to the immense shock I felt at first.

"Oh, yes. I've been waiting for you. Now, let's see here…" the salarian spoke softly as he tapped away on his omni-tool and disappeared into the storage room behind the counter. He reemerged triumphantly moments later carrying a medium-sized metal box in his spindly arms. He placed on the shelf to the chorus of a loud thump and breathed a sigh of relief, indicating the weight of said box.

"There you go. I trust everything's in order." He beamed with a warm smile.

"Uh…yes. Thank you very much." I said, picking up the box from the counter.

"You're welcome, sir. Come back any time." He smiled and gave a quick wave. I returned the gesture as I stepped out of the store and back to where Larry was sitting on a bench.

"Ah, good. You got it. Thanks, my boy." Larry chuckled as he watched me saddle on over to him with sweat staining my face and clothes.

"It's the least I could do." I told him matter-of-factly. He chuckled again at that.

"Here you go." I spoke kindly, offering it to Larry. I was befuddled when Larry shook his head and pushed back in my direction.

"No, you take it. Think of it as your reward." He explained.

"I can't take this. This belongs to you." I argued, not wanting to deprive him of what may be his last possessions.

"I don't mind. I don't really need them anymore. Besides, you look like you could use." Larry explained. As his words left his lips, a tone of sadness washed over them, a clear sign of his sadness of letting go.

"I…I don't know what to say." I stuttered, not used to having someone give me something out of kindness. Getting punches to the stomach and being beaten up in the hall certainly did not count as 'presents'…

"Think nothing of it. Well, well. Would you look at the time? I'd best be off. See ya around, kiddo. Good luck getting back home." He stared at his watch as the hands ticked away. With one final wink of his eye, he disappeared into the crowd, leaving me hanging on to the box and confused at what my next step was to be. With a heavy heart, I sat down on the bench and opened the box, slightly eager to see what lay in store for me.

The inside of the box was layered with red leather, the kind of fabric only rich people could afford. My eyes shone against the artificial light flooding the box and illuminating the valuables inside. Sitting on the soft leather was a brand new omni-tool and a chit. The first thing I did was check the chit using the new omni-tool, discarding the old one in the box. As the numbers on the display shot up, my jaw literally dropped to the floor when the counter finally stopped. It was close to 10 million credits. 'Who the hell was that guy?' was the immediate pondering as I glanced back into the crowd, vainly hoping that the old man would come back out to explain this. Damn it! What the hell am I getting myself into? One last glance at the inside of the box revealed just a little more of my mysterious benefactor. Stapled to the back of the box was a small photo depicting the old man standing side-by-side with a young man who bore a startling resemblance with me. The man was clothed in full Aliance gear and shouldering an M-8 Avenger on his back. The picture was signed with the man's cursive handwriting, reading "To my loving son, may this aid you in your battles and bring you home to me." 'His kid must have died recently if he was willing to give this away.' I thought depressingly as I closed the box and wrapped it around my arm. Without any sense of direction, I journeyed back to the main body of the Presidium.

As I finally left the Wards and reentered the Presidium, I finally took a glance at the throng of both humans and alien species alike roaming its halls. Every soul I looked upon wore an assortment of styles old and new. Several elcor passed me by, giving me a neutral stare that chilled me to the bone and wearing clothes that looked tailor-made and had dull colors to match the personas they inevitably give off to other people. Not only were they bigger and scarier than I imagined, they still possessed the speech rate that would shame even a tortoise. And then there was the volus, a species of gas-based life forms forced to wear hazard suits to adapt to the high pressure atmosphere unless they wanted to be an impromptu bomb that showers flesh and blood instead of fragments. Their raspy chatter reminded me of the various gas mask wearing survivors in any number of post-apocalyptic scenarios. 'And if you screw this up, it'll be the same here.' And last but not least were the jellyfish-like hanar who as I remembered from reading all that ancillary text, resided mainly on a water-rich environment. 'Just like a real jellyfish.' I thought as I prayed that they did not possess the ability to sting. Jellyfish stings can be painful, I can attest to that…

A couple, a human female and an asari passed me by. The female wore a black dress that accentuated every aspect of her body and matching heels to boot. Meanwhile, the asari was clad in green overalls and in a long discussion with her human companion.

Did I mention that the asari looked kinda hot? I'm going to say this again. Those asari were amazing. Their blue skin with varying shades. The way their bodies rivaled the best of our females. The tentacle-like head? Geez, I sound like a Japanese otaku. That's a scary thought.

'Wait, does that mean…?' I instantly surmised. Sticking to the shadows whenever possible and staying inconspicuous, I edged closer and closer to the AI aboard the Citadel, the well-meaning but grating Avina. Now, I skipped most of her conversations, deciding like most others that exploring on my own would be a far more rewarding prospect. 'Great, now I have to ask an annoying AI where I am.'

"Welcome to the Citadel. How may I help you?" went her sickening calm tone. 'Can't expect much here. AI here ain't like Halo. Well, except EDI but I have no idea if she's even made yet.'

"Yeah, uh. What year is this?"

"One moment. This is the year 2183." Well crap… This is Mass Effect 1. You know I just noticed a pattern. Every fanfiction I've read that has some meat on its bones tends to start right here. The guy sulking around the Citadel waiting for Shepard to show up and join their squad. In most cases, they usually have some period of time where they did their time in this place and trained for the fight ahead. Also, why are they all female Shepards? I mean, it's not like those guys were going to make a romantic sub-plot. Right? Right?

"Great, this is a whole load of bug-shite! What the hell am I supposed to do now?" I swore, cursing to myself. A turian passed me in mid-rant and gave me a puzzling look with his abnormally weird eyes and flapping mandibles. Jeez, did I want to throw up there. Stepping away, I had little else to think about. What now? Throw myself into her group and hope for the best? Change what I could? As if to answer my questions, I had to glance outside and see an all too familiar ship dock in one of the hangar bays. The word Normandy-SR1 was plastered across the broadside of the damn thing, dotted up in the usual Alliance colors.

What was even more terrifying was seeing its occupants leave the ship. In the center of it all was Shepard herself. 'Great, I'm following in their footsteps. This just keeps getting better and better.' I sarcastically moan subconsciously. Her lascivious blonde hair whipped back and forth in the pressurized airspace. Her face was the epitome of Greek beauty, mirroring that of the Greek goddess Aphrodite, topped off with stunning emerald eyes. Her body was no different, the armor form-fitting around her and bringing attention to her curves and other womanly features. 'Gee, I wonder whose fantasy this girl's trying to represent. Oh, that's right. The guy who can't keep it in his pants. Way to go, idiot.' Came my witty banter. It did raise a nagging question. Was this all a dream? Was I in reality lying comatose on the lawn and dreaming something utterly incredulous? One quick smack to my own cheek was enough to convince me. 'Nope, not dreaming.' If I wasn't a closet introvert by nature, I would totally hit that. Flanking her on her right was Ashley.

Ashley was also gorgeous but this isn't Mass Effect 3 where she decided to keep her hair long. No, this was Mass Effect 1 which meant tied-up hair and less sex appeal than I hoped for. Remembering that I went for her in the first game, I decided to cut her some slack. After all, what's beauty when you have a galaxy to save? Her white and pink armor was on full tacky display and I snorted to myself when I realized how awful it looked on her, preferring to immediately change it to something worse just for the heck of it.

Finally there was Kaiden bringing up Shepard's left. Kaiden fared slightly better than Ashley, keeping his chiseled jaw throughout each and every game. Still didn't save him back then if anyone's asking. For a moderate build, he sure packed some serious muscle. Then again, that's true of anyone who was on Shepard's team. As I watched them walk away, I realized what they were here for. And that when I thought…

Well, this day couldn't get any worse…

Well, this chapter has a slightly longer run time than the previous effort. The part about the money and omni-tool bit was added so I could easily get the find a job for money subplot out of the way and move on to the actual procurement of the gear later on. Aside from that, I also wanted to give some insight into the various races and avoid doing that in the next one. I hope this chapter lives up to my previous effort… Thank you for the feedback and make sure to keep it coming if you like this… See ya next time…