She hasn't moved since we took off, and I admit that I'm starting to get a little worried. I mean, with anyone else I couldn't care less, but this is my baby. And I did hit her pretty hard.
I pull off to the side of the road. It's fairly difficult to see where you're going when the majority of your windows are painted black, but if you drive fast enough, people tend to get out of your way. I don't think I've hit anything so far… Not that I'm going to lose any sleep over it.
My eyes hurt from what little sunlight there is coming through the windshield. A glance to where the rearview mirror used to be reminds me that they're probably bloody red already. What I wouldn't give for a pair of sunglasses right now.
A soft moan next to me pulls my attention away from the thought. She hasn't woken up yet, but she did move a little. I'll take that as a good sign. She's all dark hair framing pale smooth skin, my little beauty. Those long, dark lashes that whisper across her face; soft lips, so expressional; delicate bones that make you feel like you're looking at someone with feline blood. The first time I saw her, she literally took my breath away. A tired cliché, I know – but a cliché for a reason.
"Dru, love…"
She moves a little more, almost a shake of her head, as if she's telling me she doesn't want to wake just yet. I lightly brush back a strand of hair that's fallen across her forehead. Our skin tones are almost identical. Sometimes I think we could be siblings.
Kissing cousins, more like.
She murmurs something I don't quite catch. It's almost sunset, and I know she'll be hungry. I try again to wake her. "Drusilla, darling, it's time to wake up."
A beat, then those huge dark eyes open. Sometimes, when she's looking at you, it seems like she's *all* eyes. Just two black bottomless pools that could steal your soul if you let your guard down. I've seen her use that trick more than once. But not on me. Never on me.
I smile down at her. "Hello, love. Have a good nap?"
She looks sleepy and confused. Again a flash of worry that I did some serious damage to her. Maybe knocked more loose than was already rattling around in there.
Not nice, old boy. Not nice at all…
"Where are we?"
At least she can still speak. And she doesn't seem to be too angry with me. Yet. "We're in the car, lovey. We're taking a little trip."
She pushes herself up a little farther and moves to look around – as if she could see anything through these windows. Her hands go to her head, fingertips brushing temples. "I have a horrid headache…"
"It's okay, baby. We'll get you something to snack on, and you'll be good as new."
She looks up at me, and her face lights up with that innocent, glowing smile of hers. "Food? My tummy's all rumbly."
I touch my lips lightly to her forehead, so lightly that I can barely feel her silky skin. "I'll bet it is. Let's just drive a little further, shall we? Someplace more populated. I want my Dru to have her choice for dinner. Does that sound all right?"
A soft purr of contentment. "I'm going to hunt first before I eat."
"Whatever you want, darling." I slid back over into the driver's seat and start the car. She seems to be fine, as far as I can tell. At least by her usual standards. And no mention yet of what we left behind…
"Where's Angel?"
Strike that.
It takes a major force of will not to slam on the brakes at the sudden question. Instead I keep my eyes on the road (or what I can see of it) and try to sound nonchalant. "Angel?"
She's becoming agitated now; I can sense it without looking at her. "Why isn't Angel with us?"
Sigh. I pull over again, just another abandoned car in a ditch alongside the two-lane highway. Or so it would seem to anyone driving by. If any other cars actually drove down this road. As far as I can tell, we seem to be the only ones out tonight in this part of the world. Of course, for all I know, the Hole into Hell could be sucking up the world behind us at this very moment.
I turn off the car and face her. She's twisting her fingers together, playing some unconscious game with herself. I have to say her name twice before I can get her attention. Finally she looks up at me, but her fingers continue their dance. "Spike, has Angel left us again?"
I wince involuntarily. She doesn't notice. "Don't you remember what happened, love?"
She shakes her head. The finger-dance gets a little more crazy now. I run my hand through her hair, trying to pet her into calm submission – a trick that usually works. Big, frightened eyes searching my face, looking for comfort, reassurance. And me quickly trying to decide what to tell her.
"Angel wanted to stay with the Slayer, Dru. We tried to save him, to bring him with us, but he refused… There was a fight, and you got knocked out." There's little choice, really. I certainly can't tell her the truth… Not if I hope to keep her with me. Best cast Angel in the less-saintly role. She'll get over it soon enough.
"A fight…"
"That's right, baby. A fight. You don't remember?"
She leans into my hand, closing her eyes. Her fingers are still moving on their own. "I had a dream… a bad dream. You hurt Angel…"
"Why would I hurt our friend, Dru?" I try not to gag on the "f" word.
Her voice gets dreamy, far away. "Angel got his soul back, didn't he… No more Angelus now. But no more Angel either? Gone, gone, gone… Gone like my daisies and my dolls' eyes… Gone like the whispers that pass me in the darkness…"
She's not making any sense at all to me now, but I've grown accustomed to these shifts. And she's always right, which means this information is important. "What do you mean, 'gone?' Where did he go, Dru?"
Her eyes are still closed, and she's rocking slightly. I follow the motion with my hand, not breaking the contact. "Far… Angel's on a journey. We can't go with. But he'll return to us eventually. The locusts tell me so."
Locusts? Uh-huh…
"They also tell me…" Her eyes snap open, and her gaze goes instantly to my legs. The finger twisting becomes almost frantic, matching her wide wild eyes perfectly. "Spike…" It's almost a moan. "Spike…"
I stroke her hair again. "Shhh… It's okay, baby. Everything's okay now.…"
I didn't think it was possible, but her eyes get even bigger. She tries to back away from me, but can't go far in the tight confines of the front seat. She stops, her back against the door, eyes darting back and forth from my face to my legs. So much for calming her.
"Your legs, Spike…"
Small dashes of crimson are beginning to appear on her hands where the nails are slicing through the skin. No major damage, I can tell, but still bloody painful to watch. But I know better than to reach over to still their motion – the one time I tried that left me with a six-inch slash up the inside of my wrist when she pulled away. I had a scar there for two weeks.
"It's okay, love," I whisper, not paying much attention to my words but to my tone. She's not listening anyway.
Her eyes meet mine and hold them. "You're all better now?"
I smile. "Yes, Dru. All better."
Her eyes go to my legs again, as if she doesn't quite believe it. I guess I can see how this could come as something of a shock. "All better…" Her forehead is furrowed, all crinkled lines of confusion. They make her look very young and endearing, and I curse myself silently for hurting her. Just as I always do, every time she's unhappy or distraught. Hurting her is the only thing I worry about. I don't give a damn about the rest of it, as long as she's happy and safe.
She's looking at me again, but some of the confusion has faded. "You didn't tell me, Spike."
I can't tell if it's an accusation, or a simple statement. "It was a surprise, lovey. A special traveling surprise just for you."
Her fingers skip a beat in their rhythm. They pick up again, but less frenzied now. "I love surprises…"
"I know you do, Dru. That's why I kept this one secret."
She seems to consider this. Her finger-dance is slowing, and I think I've gotten us past this little crisis. "Are you ready now? I know you're hungry…"
The distraction works, as they usually do. "Hungry, hungry, hungry… I want to feel warm blood running over my tongue. I want to hunt, Spike."
"Soon, baby." I start the car again and pull out. I have no idea where we might be at the moment, but it stands to reason that we're not too far from the next piece of civilization.
Drusilla's words run through my mind. Angel's gotten his soul back, has he? Isn't that lovely. Perhaps now she'll get over this little re-infatuation with him, now that he's that soft, sappy human-vamp again. At the very least, he won't want her anymore – he'll probably crawl back to that cute little blond Slayer he's so fond of. And then Dru and I can go back to being a happy little family again.
She'd said he'd gone… I wonder what that meant. A journey? Where? Maybe it doesn't matter, since he's *gone* no matter what. But she also said he'd come back; hopefully it won't be for a bloody long time. Time enough for her to forget him.
I glance over at her. She's sitting there in silence, staring blankly at the blacked-out windshield, a finger absently twirling a strand of dark hair. Her head rests on the seat behind her. She looks comfortable enough. I decide not to interrupt her thoughts with questions that could just lead to more trouble.
My eyes sting, and I've got a headache of my own from all the blasted sunlight. I rub at my eyes with one hand, but it doesn't do much to improve things. Bloody daytime…
It's now just after sunset, so I roll down my window. I have to struggle with the handle to convince it to open without breaking off the thing completely. The cool air coming in doesn't make me feel any better, as I'd hoped it would. Ah well… No doubt I'll feel fine after this little hunt.
I keep waiting for Drusilla to turn to me and ask where we're going. Trouble is, I don't have an answer for her. My thinking up to now has been completely short-term: get Dru, get away from the opening into Hell that Angel so thoughtfully provided, get out of town. I've been blinded by the thought that we have to get out of Scummydale, that we have to be together again. Someplace where we can rebuild things. Someplace we can be happy.
Besides, it's not like I've ever been much of a planner. One thing I've learned after living this long is that you just have to take things as they come. Stay alive and try to enjoy. Otherwise you might as well just be a human, and hope that your dull life is mercifully short.
I realize suddenly just how hungry I am, and that makes me glance over at my love. She's staring at the torn ceiling of the car now. Her lips are moving, but I can't make out what she's saying. But she still looks so peaceful, so I let her alone. If she's enjoying herself, I'm not going to bother her.
A dirty sign catches my attention. Seems we're finally approaching a town out here in this empty wasteland. "Welcome to Winteridge: Our town is your town." A smile spreads across my face. Why thank you so much, Winteridge. That's quite generous. Don't mind if I do.
Winteridge it is. Certainly can't pass up an offer like that. And, as an extra bonus, it looks like they're having some sort of fair. As we get closer, I can see booths strung with colored lights, and even what looks like a Ferris Wheel. I laugh aloud, elated by this turn of events. An entire town, gathered together for a little fun. All wrapped up in one convenient package.
"So pretty…"
Dru's looking out my window now, leaning so close to me that she's practically climbing on top of me to get a better view. Her hair whispers against the arm of my leather jacket. On an impulse, I pull her over to sit in my lap. "This is Winteridge, darling. They've invited us over for supper. Would you like to go?"
She rests her head on her arm on the window sill, watching the lights get closer. "Oh, yes… I can smell their blood already."
She begins to hum something, and I can feel her body vibrating faintly against mine. I rest my chin lightly on her shoulder, enjoying the way she fits against me. Curves embracing curves, flesh melting into flesh. This is the way it's *supposed* to be. Me and Dru against the world.
I'm not going to let anybody take that away again.
There's a dirt parking lot at the edge of the festivities, and I pull the car in next to a vehicle even older than the one we're in. Dusty, peeling green paint with windows so dirty you can't see inside. Maybe our ride won't stick out much after all.
"Okay, love… We're here."
She moves off of me. "Can we play now?"
"Yes, Dru, it's playtime. Are you ready?"
She nods and opens the car door. I do the same, not bothering to roll up the window. I haven't even decided yet if this is going to be the car we leave town in.
I stand up, and a wave of dizziness comes from out of nowhere. Stunned, I lean back against the car and try to regain my equilibrium. What the bloody hell was that?
"Spike, what's wrong?"
Drusilla's in front of me now, though I didn't hear her come around the car. I force a smile, hoping to erase the worry from her eyes. "Nothing, baby. Nothing at all."
She moves closer, pressing her body against mine. One long, red nail runs lightly down the side of my face as she stares into my eyes. "Nothing?" It sounds so hopeful, yet disbelieving at the same time.
I'm certainly not going to disappoint her. Besides, it's fading away already. Just too much time sitting in that car. "I promise, love. There's nothing wrong." I take her hand and hold it to my lips. I can feel her pulse racing underneath my fingertips. My tongue runs over one of the cuts on the back of her pale hand, and I get the faint taste of blood. Gently I suck at it, reopening the tiny wound. Her dark eyes close, and her lips part slightly. My dark angel. My love.
I pull her closer, dropping her hand and meeting her lips with my own. My fingers get wrapped in her thick hair, and I can feel her arms slip around my waist. I crush her against me and am rewarded with a small moan. Could Angel ever make her feel like this?
Angel. His image comes into my mind and refuses to leave. I see them together in my mind. The way he used to touch her, taunting me with his ability to put his arms around her while I was confined to that stupid chair. The way she used to love it…
I pull away from her, angry. She takes a step back, a hurt frown marring her features. Instantly my anger towards her melts away. He never truly loved her, just used her to get to me. And the poor girl was caught in his lie, believing that he had come back to her. It wasn't her fault.
But the next time I see that bastard, I'm going to make him pay. Especially if I have to go through a Slayer to do it.
I move away from the car and slip my arm around her waist. "Come on, love. It's hunting time."
We wander slowly toward the fair, just another couple coming to enjoy the party. Just an ordinary chap out for a night with his girl, looking to show her a good time. Maybe win her a stuffed bear or two, go on a few rides, kill a few natives…
Dru's so excited she's almost glowing. I hold her more tightly, thrilled to see her having so much fun. I knew things could be back to the way they used to be, if we just relocated. "What do you want to do first, ducky?"
Her eyes glitter in the multi-colored lights. "Mmmm…everything." She pulls away from me and spins around, her arms spread at her sides. The hem of her red dress flits around her ankles, dancing to her crazy rhythm. A group walks by, headed to the lot, staring at us. I don't even acknowledge them, because then I'd have to take my eyes off of my beloved. She's laughing as she twirls, and I'm laughing with her. To hell with all the rest of it.
I catch her, wrapping her in my arms. Her face is buried against my neck, but I can still hear her whispered words. "It's a Festival. They dance and play and scream and laugh and spend and sing and love and die, all to the tune of the singing lights… Pretty, pretty colors, each with their own special song. I hear them… They sing to me. They tell me I'm their princess. Princess of the Festival…"
"And these lights, do they tell you who should be our first new friend tonight?"
"Yes, I see them… Young, dark, happy… Foolish. They're waiting for us, but they don't know it yet."
I kiss her. "Well, Princess, let's go let them know."
We walk together through the fence gate and into the carnival. Almost instantly the crowd presses around us, a random pocket of people just inside the entrance. They all smell so warm and rich… I fight back an urge to just start picking them off, one by one. But there's not much fun there – that way Festival tends to be over almost before it begins.
I turn my head just enough to see that Drusilla has that glint in her eyes. The one that means things are about to get a lot more interesting very quickly. That's my girl.
The crowd falls apart around us at just a little nudge. Then everyone is heading off in their own separate directions, looking for excitement and happiness in all the different booths and sparkling lights. Humans are always searching for *something,* without ever knowing quite what it is that they're looking for. Consequently, they rarely ever find it. Seems a tremendous waste of energy to me. But, admittedly, it's a lot easier to see a thing like that after being apart from it for so long. I suppose they just can't help it.
We set off ourselves, wandering around a bit before Drusilla spots something and heads for a nearby table. I follow, interested in seeing what's grabbed her attention this time. Should have guessed – it's a collection of hand-made porcelain dolls. Dru loves dolls, has a variety of them at home. Of course, hers bear very little resemblance to the ones for sale here. She likes to… *alter* hers. Cut their hair, modify their clothing, take out their little glassy eyes…
At the moment she's cuddling one, holding it tightly against her breasts. She's whispering to it, and the woman running the booth looks a bit distraught. I imagine she doesn't know quite what to do in this particular situation. Perhaps if it had been a small child showing this enthusiasm, she wouldn't have been so confused. But a grown woman clinging to a doll in public is probably something she doesn't see too often. Though, personally, I think she should take it as a compliment on her work and leave it at that.
I give the woman no more than a passing glance when I actually come up to the booth – enough to recognize that she's now trying to watch Dru without seeming to do so. Worse than outright staring, and fairly damn cowardly. I ignore her, and turn to my girl. The doll, I see now, looks remarkably like her. Same dark hair and eyes, same pale, flawless skin. But more – there's something about the expression that reminds me exactly of the way Drusilla looks at me when she wants something. I swear this doll is pouting at me.
"How much?" I ask the woman.
She looks up quickly, a jerk of the head in surprise at actually being spoken to. "Excuse me?"
"How much does this cost?" I try again, gesturing at the doll. Dru carries on her bonding session, oblivious to our conversation.
"Forty dollars. Aren't they lovely?"
I try not to roll my eyes at the sudden change in her manner. Now that we're discussing money, she's every bit false charm and salesmanship. Someone needs to cast this person on the Home Shopping Network. "Mmm. Yes, lovely…" I'm about out of patience with this woman. And I'm hungry. Okay, time to move on.
"Dru…"
She looks up at me. Again I'm struck by how much this doll looks like her. As if the artist had seen her before. It would be a shame to just leave it behind. And, as if she's reading my mind, Dru holds the doll up to me. "Spike, this is Anastasia. She loves to play… She wants to come home with us and meet the others. I've told her all about them…" She leans in close to my ear and whispers, "She knows me."
Who am I to argue with logic like that? If my baby wants it, my baby gets it. Besides, I didn't get the chance to grab too many of her dolls when we skipped town. This should keep her happy for a while, just in case we don't get back there anytime soon. I smile at Dru. "Okay, lovey. Let's bring her with us then."
She gives me that gorgeous giddy smile that I know so well and hugs the doll tightly. The woman behind the table smiles as well and hauls herself out of her brown metal chair.
"Wonderful choice. A souvenir from this carnival of ours. You two *are* from out of town, right?"
"Just passing through. Stopped by for a little something to eat."
"Isn't that nice… Are you two on a trip?" Her smile's getting bigger, and I'm afraid that if it doesn't stop growing, her face will break apart. Bloody garish is what it is. Probably thinking now that she's got the sale in her pocket she might as well try a bit of a scam on the poor stupid tourists. Sorry, ducky. Not tonight…
"Something like that." I'm watching her movements, waiting for her to get just a little closer. And for the three stragglers behind me to stumble a little further on. Drusilla's already moving away from the table, Anastasia in her arms. Which I can see is making my new friend a little anxious.
"That'll be fifty dollars, please." She tries to sound as calm and smooth as possible, but her attention is on Dru as she gets farther away with the doll.
"Fifty? You said forty a moment ago." My proper line in its proper place. The trio is almost past, with no one else in sight. Come on and *move,* damn it. I'm tried of this woman and her terrible acting. Let's just get this done.
She pretends to be thinking about it. I feel like cueing her from the director's chair. Okay, Woman Number One, this is the part where you say…
…"No, I'm certain I said fif–"
The group rounds the corner. My hands dart out and grab her, snapping her neck before she even has the chance to scream, let alone finish her feeble lie. Her body falls to the dirt, effectively hidden from sight of passerby by the table cloth she's hand-painted with her name in fluorescent green. Nice, neat, and over in a second. The people in the booth next to hers continue their debate about the hierarchy of cartoon superheroes without even a faintly-suspicious pause. I glance at the other dolls on display, trying to decide if I should get my dear another present. But none of the others compare to the one she's already got, so I decide to leave things as they are.
When I turn around, Drusilla's no longer there. A sliver of concern before I remind myself that she's a big girl. If she's decided to go wandering alone, so be it. I'll find her sooner or later. Though, with Dru, it usually tends to be *later.* Later as in after a Slayer and/or numerous local "authority" figures have arrived on the scene. Still, she can do what she wants. *I'm* certainly not going to be the one to try and stop her.
I pick a direction – the one heading towards the bulk of the lighting effects, because that's the way Drusilla would have chosen. Even though it's small, it seems the people of Winteridge have made something of an effort for this event. Hand-made crafts and artwork for sale everywhere, food, even face-painting. Isn't that just the sweetest thing…
The gooey goodness of the place is already beginning to get to me. Where *did* Dru wander off to?
After wading through a swamp of bored vendors and running children, I find her standing in the middle of the obligatory carnival "Fun Zone." Not doing anything, just standing there as people push past her and overly-enthusiastic game operators call out for her attention. Just standing there, wide-eyed and childlike, drinking in the colors and sounds of the Festival.
She turns before I reach her, having sensed my approach. "They're close to us, Spike. Ready for us to take them…"
I glance around, but see no one in the crowd who fits the description she gave earlier. "Where?"
"Close… I can see them."
The way she whispers that sends a little shiver of anticipation through me. It's been far too long since I've been able to hunt like I used to… like I was meant to. I can feel the excitement building between us, and I lick my lips. "Show them to me, baby."
Drusilla looks up at me, a slow smile spreading across her face. Her lips part, as if she's about to say something, but she turns without a word and darts away into the sea of people. I can hear her faint giggle from somewhere ahead, but I've already lost sight of her. Seems this game is to be more than just the standard hunt of two anonymous victims. I also have to chase *her.*
I'm loving it already.
I throw myself into the throng, making my own path through the mass of bodies. I'm almost running now, ignoring the protestations and complaints of the humans I'm pushing out of the way. I catch a glimpse of my darling's red dress up ahead, just a brief moment before she's swallowed up again. I have no idea where we're headed, or if indeed we actually have a concrete destination. Dru herself might not even know. But I'm tracking her, and she's in full control of the game. Whether she knows or not doesn't really make much difference.
I feel as if I'm flying. This freedom I've missed out on for so long now… I'd almost forgotten what it felt like. No more confinement, no more having to pretend that I'm still a worthless cripple who can't even hunt for himself. No more having to sit and take insults from that bastard half-vampire. No more being taken care of, being seen as helpless. I'm running, standing, hunting. I'm chasing my Dru through a hick carnival, a god and goddess among mere mortals. I'm whole again.