Team Fortress 2: Chronicles
It was a late, cold night in 2fort. The battle of the day was over, both teams had left to go back to their bases and sleep for the night. The resulted stalemate led to much disappointment between both teams… everyone called it a night, except for one certain BLU spy. He knew the best form of assault was by surprising the enemy, even at 2:31 in the morning. He waited until he knew everyone had fallen asleep. At 3:00 am he decided to make his move, carefully creeping out of the supply closet trying not wake any of his teammates. He made it out eventually, disguised himself as a RED medic, and headed off the sniper balcony. As he was making his way towards the main entrace, he saw a enemy Pyro seemingly waiting for him! Something was not right, he thought to himself. The Pyro could obviously see him from where he is, and it was quite obvious as well he was a spy, so he should have been chased down mercilessly by the Pyro. However, he wasn't and wondered why, so he went a little closer to inspect the Pyro only to hear muffled snoring! As the Spy went closer for a backstab, the Pyro unexpectedly tried to set him on fire, the flames almost touching his face. He knew then, the Pyro was subconsciously waiting for enemy spies to foolishly wander into RED base.
The thought of being cooked made the BLU spy shiver, so he decided to proceed through the sewers. He made his way through the tunnels, up the stairs, and up some more stairs onto the main floor. Still seeing the same Pyro, the Spy fortunately manage to cloak and run past him. The Spy made his way up some more stairs until he beheld a wonderful sight. An unguarded sentry! The Spy was verytempted to put maybe just one sapper on it. However, he knew the Engineer which spawned this murderous contraption was psychic… or just good at guessing. In any case, he did not want to take any chances. The Spy made his very down into the RED intelligence room which BLU team rarely saw. The Spy went into the room where the enigmatic briefcase was, and stared in awe to be the first, in a long time, to pick up RED teams intelligence!
Meanwhile… back in RED spawn room...
"ALERT! OUR INTELLIGENCE IS BEING TAKEN!" said the mysterious voice from above.
"Shuddap, ya freakin' old bimbo!" yelled the Scout, "We're tryin' to sleep!"
"Darnit, dere ain't any way anybody can mosey in our base with mah trusty sentry guarding da place! And, who is dumb enuff to come sneakin' into our base at 3:11am?" the Engineer thought to himself, however he convinced himself maybe some rat moved the intelligence by accident, prompting the mysterious voice to yell eccentrically… knowing this he rapidly fell back asleep on the nice, hard, cold, concrete floor.
The BLU spy smiled with glee as he made his way up the wheel chair ramp; once he made it to the top he once again beheld the defenseless sentry. The sentry itself was just asking to be sapped, and the temptation was too great, he could no longer hold back. He took out his biggest sapper which he conveniently kept an infinite supply in his pocket, and began sabotaging the RED team's one and only sentry.
"Spy sappin' mah sentry!" Yelled the Engineer at the top of his lungs, waking up everybody in the RED spawn room.
"Really mate, it's bad enough we have ta listen ta the sound of your sentry's beeping, but now your just bein' bloody annoying!" grumbled the Sniper.
"Sentry down!" the Engineer said. "Boys, deres a spy around here!"
"Herr Engineer, how vout you fall asleep vonce more, and me and you can discuss your nightmares in da morning, ja?" said the Medic.
"No can do Doc… I know what's goin' on now…" the Engineer replied in a dreadfully serious tone. From his locker, he grabbed shotgun, pistol and trusty wrench. He made his way out of the spawn room, onto the battlements to see a BLU spy with a red briefcase on his back running across the bridge! The Engineer snarled at the sight and chased after the Spy. He fired two shots from his pistol both missing intentionally, just to get the spy's attention. The Spy turned to face his arch-nemesis in a seemingly awkward stare-down. After a couple of seconds of silence, the Engineer finally said, "Dat dere is RED team property! You bes' be handing it over before I lose my patience, boy!"
"Zat will not be happening, monsieur laborer." Said the Spy in a formal tone. "You see, for too long have you, ze enemy, been outsmarting my team at every turn, and ze same for you! However… once I capture zis intelligence, our team will finally have ze knowledge of all RED team weaknesses, and ve, the BLU team, shall triumph over you once and for all!" the Spy took out his small, but deadly revolver. "Now, just lay your weapons down and walk away…"
"Dat, mah friend, ain't happenin' any time soon… besides, I have the bigger gun…" while saying that, the Engineer brandished a shotgun and pointed it cautiously at the Spy. "Now… who's going to make the first shot?"
At that moment, the Spy opened fire first, and went behind some barrels for cover.
The Engineer did the same, shooting from his shotgun and taking cover behind the bridge railings. However, the Spy's revolver, being more accurate, and manages to hit the Engineer in the arm. The Spy unfortunately, was running low on ammo for his small handgun and now had to rely on stealth to dispatch his most hated foe.
"Well, laborer… zis vill be za last time you see me" after saying that, the Spy merged with the shadows which astonished the Engineer. Everything was silent now, except for the sound of the cold night wind. The Engineer had to think whether the Spy had made a run into his own base to capture the RED team intelligence or was he waiting for an opportune time to strike him? The Engineer cautiously looked in every direction, and blasting away hopefully hurting the Spy, but a shadow drew nearer, climbing from the bridge railing, attacked and disarmed the Engineer of his shotgun, and pistol.
"It's been fun laborer, but ze games are finished and it is time for you to die." Said the Spy in a more sinister tone, as he was reaching for his knife suddenly the Engineer lead a clean smack across the Spy's face with his trusty wrench, knocking a tooth from his mouth.
The Engineer laughed with amusement and said, "I'm just getting warmed up, ya yellow-bellied gutless coward!" The Spy was however not amused and was quite enraged by the damage caused to his face; however he was trained to keep his cool and not show any sign of anger.
Instead he bitterly mocked the Engineer saying, "Why don't you just give up, pardner?" in a stereotypical Texan accent. The Spy took out his knife and went into a fencing pose.
"Honestly thinkin' of getting me with dat dere butterknife? My wrench is twice the length, and twice the pain."
"Like a caveman, laborer, your mind follows a simple paz. While you have been taught to hit everyzing wiz your wrench, I have been put through elite training in the art of melee combat. A knife iz all I need to kill you, pardner." The Spy harshly replied, now waiting for the Engineer to make his move. As expected the Engineer did make the first move, and went for an over-head strike, which surprisingly was blocked by the small little knife. The Spy then elbowed him in the stomach and threw him over his shoulder, and then backed off allowing his opponent to recuperate. The Spy this time went for a stab in the stomach, which the Engineer managed to dodge it, but he was still alarmed on how close he came to being pierced… The Engineer countered by doing a diagonal swing hitting the Spy on the shoulder, which caused him to stumble and fall onto one knee.
"Not bad… not bad at all, laborer… but I zink zat bullet wound in your arm is slowing you down, but I have not been in a good fight since ze old days…" Suddenly, the Spy went for a horizontal swipe and manages to make a clean cut across the Engineers chest. The cut itself is moderate, but very alarming to the Engineer and not to mention annoying to him.
"Gosh darnit, and dis was mah favourite RED uniform! Now you've gone and ruined it!" With that, the Engineer took a bit of his blood and sprinkled it onto the Spy's luxurious BLU outfit. The Spy gasped in horror seeing his fancy outfit has been ruined! This was the straw that broke that camel's back.
"You… you can hit my face wiz your wrench, you can burn me alive, or drown me… but when you mess wiz my suit, zats when you have crossed the line, ouvrier stupide! Now for my ultimate attack! Ze backstab!" With that, the Spy faded into nothingness and once again the Engineer was left alone once again, cautiously being aware of his surroundings...his back was facing the BLU team's base. Suddenly, the BLU spy fell from the sky, with his knife facing the Engineer's back, and he impaled him. The Engineer fell slumped onto the ground. "Yes! I am victorious! Now BLU team will surely rise over RED team from zis point on! Hahahahaa…"
Suddenly, the Engineer, using the last bit of his strength, rose up and said, "It's… not over yet… dummy!" with that, he grabbed his wrench and by using both of his hands came down on a vertical attack so hard, that his wrench got stuck in the Spy's head.
"Oh, merde…" were the last words the Spy murmured before collapsing on the ground presumably dead. With that, the RED team briefcase fell off the Spy…
"THE ENEMY HAS DROPPED OUR INTELLIGENCE" yelled the mysterious voice.
"Good night, Irene…" The Engineer passed out and heard the faint words of RED teams intelligence returning to his base.
The Morning After…
"Guten morgen, team…" the half-asleep Medic said.
"HELLO DOKTOR FRIEND!" Yelled the already hyper Heavy
"Was it jus' me!? Or was that damn voice keeping everybody awake?!" The Scout yelled out.
Everyone replied with a zombie-like groan that seems to mean yes. "Wait a minute! Where's that maggot Engy?! He can't miss breakfast! It's the most important meal of the day!" Soldier demanded to know.
"Ja, last night he left avfter saying there vas something disturbing his zentry. Mein guess iz he fell asleep outside" explained the Medic in a more awake tone.
So, the RED team went to investigate. They left the resupply room curious to know where their hard-hatted friend had gone off too. They were all shocked to see the remnants of the Engineers sentry gun, nothing more than a pile of scrap metal. This was a wake-up call for the entire team, because now everyone was on full-alert. RED team was discussing on what happened to the sentry and to their beloved Engineer.
"Hudda uhudda mmf hud!" The Pyro mumbled in the most sensible way he could.
"LITTLE BLU COWARDS ENTER BASE WHILE WE SLEPT! I GET SASHA AND KILL BLU BABIES!" yelled the Heavy.
"Boys, we gotta secure the perimeter! There might have been a breach! Or, worse yet a maybe the BLU team kidnapped Engy! Oh, the humanity! The BLU team are subjecting him to their immoral, psychopathic ways and are brainwashing him to become a scumbag like them! Those BLU maggots wi-" the Soldiers soliloquy was interrupted by the Sniper who had said he saw a body nearby BLU base and thought it was the Engineer! They made across the bridge only to see BLU team standing at their doors glaring at RED team. On the ground was the body of the Engineer and BLU spy with a wrench lodged into his head.
"You! Are you maggots responsible for this?!" Yelled the BLU Soldier pointing at the corpse of their BLU spy.
"Hold yer tongue there, boyo! Care to discoos why our sentry in our base is destroyed?" the Demoman responded sobriety in his voice.
"Your engineer was obviously plannin' on buildin' a sentry in our base! So when we woke up we'd get .50 calibre bullets as our breakfast!" The BLU scout said.
"Nein, dummkopf! Our Engineer haz more honour zen that and vould not do such a ting!" The RED medic retorted.
"Yeah! I'm sure this bloody spy had something to do with Engy being disturbed last night in his sleep! He was sure complain' about his sentry from what I heard" the Sniper yelled.
The RED team agreed with the Snipers theory, while the BLU didn't take this so lightly… in fact, they thought of it as an insult and were ready to punish their counterparts. Just then, everyone loaded and readied their weapon because they knew this would inevitably lead to a bloodbath.
"You maggots will pay for murdering our Engineer! You know that respawn is turned off during the night! Our Engineer is dead but his memory will not be lost! And, we will honour him for his bravery and valour! Today only one team will remain…" With that, the Soldier led the attack against BLU base with all of RED team following him into battle. BLU team, also led by their Soldier, prepared themselves for their final showdown. All that was known about that epic day was that the Announcer seemingly couldn't make up her mind whether the intelligence was being taken or not and seemed like this battle was never going to stop…
Meanwhile in Hell…
"Well laborer, I did not expect ze circumstances zat we vould have an eterneety to settle our differences… But, at least I veil not be bored here!" Said the Spy.
"Hehehe, neither did I! Tell ya what… first one to 'lose' in this undead match has to swim in the lake of fire for at least a millennium!" Said the Engineer with excitement in his voice.
"Deal" the Spy replied.
And with that both rivals clashed in the depths of Hades in attempts to solve their long-lasting feud against each other, even though they have an eternity of suffering and pain waiting for them. Still, at least fighting each other makes them sleep better at night.
The End…?