A/N. This story contains some spoilers for season 6, and the rest is pure speculation and my imagination. Warning to any readers looking for fluff, you will not find it until much later. Angst is what I do well, and where I believe B&B are at right now in the season. Please also note that the events of this story are not necessarily in order, but there is a very good reason for that.

Dedication: This story is dedicated to my wonderful loving husband, and some fantastic people at The Aby.

A huge thank you to joybrennan, my pricless beta.

Bones does not belong to me. If it did, I would not allow even the hint of an SO in season 6.

The Medico Legal Lab was, as usual, a flurry of activity. Booth leaned on the barrier of the observation deck, watching the Squints go about their respectful tasks methodically. Like many times in the past, he felt out of place. He still felt part of the team, an amazing, competent team, led by himself and…her. He couldn't 'bring himself to think about her, about the guilt which clouded all thoughts associated with her; guilt which was eating away at him bit by bit. The feeling wasn't at all helped by the way the Squints, especially Angela, were behaving around him now distant, to the point, and nothing more. Cam seemed sympathetic, but disappointed, and his partner, well, she was dealing with things by keeping anything on a personal level from him. What more could he expect from her? He shouldn't expect anything. Not now. Not anymore.

As if on cue, his partner was striding onto the forensic platform. He noticed her slight wince as she lifted her hand to swipe her ID, and felt like someone had kicked him in the stomach. The images, so fresh in his mind came back to him in full force. The words, the gun, the betrayal, the blood, her bright red blood, everywhere, on his hands, on his shirt, on the floor, soaking through her soft sky blue shirt, her hair sprawled around her head on the floor, and the guilt. He couldn't bring himself to even look at her for a whole week after it happened.

"Seeley?" He turned to see that Cam had joined him, his thoughts having prevented him from noticing that she had stepped off the forensic platform.

He sighed, "Camille".

"Don't call me Camille." She admonished with a smile.

"Don't call me Seeley", he replied flatly. He wasn't in the mood today. Even if the banter felt familiar in all of this confusion, he was too busy brooding, and wanted to be left alone, thank you very much.

Cam sighed, and watched him carefully for a moment, following his line of sight. Of course his eyes were glued to Dr Brennan, who was currently issuing instructions to intern of the week, Mr Nigel-Murray. She braced herself for the conversation she was about get into. "This has to stop Booth."

"I don't know what you're talking about Cam." He continued to stare at Brennan.

"You're punishing yourself; wallowing in guilt. It needs to stop." She looked at him directly.

Booth tore his eyes from Brennan, pushed his body off the barrier and shoved his hands in his pockets. "You weren't the one who was betrayed Cam. Someone you… care about wasn't hurt because of something you did. I was stupid, and it almost got my partner killed. I don't even know why she wants to continue our partnership….whatever it is." He turned on his heel and towards the stairs.

"She forgives you Seeley. We all do, Angela too - whether you want to accept it or not."

Booth stopped just as he was about to descend the stairs, only for a moment, then continued on his way. Forgiveness? Forgiveness wasn't going to erase the moment she'd looked into his eyes as the bullets had torn into her body in swift succession. He felt Brennan's eyes on him as he made his way out the Lab. Don't Bones. Please, just…don't.

Cam wasn't going to go after him. Everything was still too raw, too fresh, and she didn't want to push. She sighed. But oh no; she was definitely not going to deny that he had been very stupid, blinded, and even to some extent, childish. From the moment he had arrived from Afghanistan, he had failed to see what was right in front of him. He had been deliberate, cold towards his partner and even to the team at times. He was a new man. The post coma Booth who had confessed love for Brennan and had come to her for advice as to what to do about it, was long gone. He was in a relationship and committed to making it work. He had told them he was in love with Hannah. He hadn't noticed that his partner had unselfishly tried to be happy for him, and tried to do all she could to not get in the way of his new relationship.

Cam had known it was all a façade. Brennan had struggled with her conflicted emotions from their first case back. She'd seen the hurt flash across the anthropologist's face at Booth's curt remarks, and direct answers. The team had observed a shift in the dynamic. Booth and Brennan had hardly bickered, and Booth didn't stop by the Lab to annoy them unnecessarily. She'd wanted to kick him, shake him, and do whatever it took to knock some sense into him. Hadn't she told him, he had to be sure, or Brennan would die of loneliness before she trusted another man again? From what she had heard, from what Angela had managed to drag out of Brennan, Booth hadn't been sure, and Brennan had not been ready. She'd watched as they'd clutched one another's hands at the airport, and wondered why they thought running from each other was the best option for them. Then again, she'd naively believed absence would make the heart grow fonder, and they'd both get their act together and put everyone out of their misery upon their return.

Perhaps it was the fact that first Michelle, and then Paul had come into her life. She wanted everyone she cared about to be happy like she was. She'd fooled herself into thinking it would work out for Booth and Brennan too. How stupid she had been. She was a scientist for goodness sake, not a goddamned idealist! That was Angela. Booth had come back having fallen in love in a war zone, of all places. That 'love', had shown up in DC during their second case back. They should have noticed the cracks then. But everyone was too….surprised at the time.

She did feel sympathy for the man though. The betrayal wasn't the kind which would sting for a while, then eventually go away. She could see that it was like a knife in his chest, especially when he looked at Brennan. Cam watched as Brennan's gaze followed Booth as he made his way out of the lab. She watched as the other woman's face paled and her shoulders hunched. She wanted to lock them in a room and order them to sort it out, for everyone's sanity. If only things were so simple.

Brennan watched as Booth walked out of the glass doors. He hadn't said a word to her when he'd come in this morning, and had chosen to retreat upstairs instead. Did he really not want to see her? Did he want to sever their partnership? She'd never been any good at reading people, but she had thought she knew how to read Booth, at least most of the time. But since she'd been released from the hospital, he'd avoided her unless absolutely necessary. When they were together, he retained a stoic demeanor she couldn't read, and spoke to her in brief statements only relating to their case. She felt useless. He'd always known how to help her, what to say, how to get through her defenses. She didn't know how to help him. Not when he was shutting her out. Then it occurred to her. In an instant, Brennan had snapped off her gloves and walked as fast as she could after Booth. If she tried hard enough, she'd catch up to him before he drove away.

Once she'd made it outside, she saw him opening the door to the car. "Booth!"

Booth didn't turn around. God was punishing him. He was sure. All he wanted to do right now was to not have to look at her. He wanted to be as far away from her as possible. He felt her hand on his shoulder. God was definitely punishing him today. He made a mental note to visit the confessional as soon as possible, maybe the man upstairs might relent once in a while. When he felt her squeeze his shoulder, he turned around and his heart fell into stomach. He regretted his thoughts instantly, and was flooded with memories of the last time he had walked away from her after she'd been pleading with him to listen to her: he'd continued walking and ploughed straight into their impending doom.

Once she'd managed to convince him to turn around and look at her, everything she wanted to say seemed to have stuck to her throat. His eyes were dark, and his rigid posture and reaction to her hand on his shoulder indicated that he wasn't going to put his guard down. The chilly wind swept stray locks of hair onto her face, and without thinking she flicked them away with her hand, and winced as the pain hit her side.

"Bones?" He immediately stepped forward and put his hands on her shoulders to steady her as she tried, in vain, to mask the pain. He wanted the ground to swallow him whole. She did not deserve this.

Brennan gritted her teeth, and fought against the pain, as Booth studied her face.

"I'm fine Booth. It's ok. I temporarily forgot that any sudden movements would cause…discomfort." She was going to say pain, but Booth didn't need to be burdened with that right now. This wasn't about her pain. She could handle it, if she wasn't so stupid in future and remembered the things that one with injuries such as hers wasn't supposed to do. No, Booth's pain was something she'd experienced herself, and never been able to move on from, not really - the pain of betrayal.

"Booth. I'm waiting for Angela to finish the victim's facial reconstruction. Do you want to have coffee….with me?" What if he didn't ? What would she do then?

He shoved his hands in his pockets and his fingers came into contact with old poker chip. Did he want to go have coffee with her? Did he want to look at her face? The same face which had masked her hurt and internal struggles – to his satisfaction- as he'd revealed that he was in love with Hannah? Yes he admits, he enjoyed twisting the knife of jealousy and showing Bones that had she agreed to give them a chance, she would have been in Han- that psychopath's place. He bit back a laugh. Bones and that woman had no place in the same train of thought. Bones would give her life before betraying him; he didn't doubt that for a second...now. But he'd been blinded by his broken heart back then. He'd wanted to fill the void left by her rejection. Her rejection. "No Seeley", he thought, "you were so convinced, so mad she didn't love you that you didn't really hear what she was saying. But you realised eventually, and then she almost died."

"Booth?"

He looked at Bones and saw the vulnerability in her face. Right, she was waiting for an answer.

"You know Bones; I've got…a lot of paperwork just begging for my attention back at the office. I don't think-"

"Booth please?"

His eyes darkened. She'd said the wrong thing. Why couldn't she ever get it right? Stupid!

Booth please? He would never forget those words. Never forget the way he'd wrenched his hand from hers as she'd been trying to talk to him.

"I'm…I'm trying my best here Booth. You of all people know that I'm terrible at this. Please, I …need you to help me. I can't do anything to ease you of this burden if you don't let me help you. Please...just...talk to me."

Now he was getting angry. She couldn't possibly understand what he was feeling.

"You're right. You're not good at this. I don't need your help Bones. I'm fine."

Her eyes betrayed her hurt before her brain could stop them, and she felt the moisture accumulate. She had to get a hold of herself. What was wrong with her? She was supposed to be trying to help him, and here she was threatening to fall apart

"I know you're trying to push me away by attempting to hurt my feelings Booth." She stepped closer, and they both felt their heart rate increase. "But I won't let you push me away."

He steeled himself and stepped back. "I need to go. Call me when Angela's finished." He turned away from her and unlocked the door. He was the world's biggest loser. Hadn't he learned his lesson already?

Brennan didn't think there was anything more she could say. She stepped back, and looked at her twisting hands. She knew he wasn't going back to his office. She wanted to give him as much space as he needed, but she had been scared and worried. She was startled out of her thoughts by his hand gently stilling hers.

"Bones, I just need some space right now, ok? And some time. Just...don't worry about me. I just need to sort this out...on my own. Just...give me some time. Can you do that?" Or maybe she could just give up on him like he'd given up on her. Or, even better, she could just hit him and demand to know what right in hell he had to ask her for some time, when it was the one thing she'd needed, and he'd denied it because of his selective understanding.

Time? He wanted time. Alright. She'd let him have time. But not forever. She wasn't going to let him self-destruct and drown in his guilt and self-loathing. "Ok."

He was relieved to be off the hook and free to hate himself. He forced a smile and had to stop himself from practically wrenching open the door and diving into the truck.

"Be careful."

"Yeah." Please stop talking, he thought. She needed to stop before he turned around and crushed her in his arms and told her again and again how sorry he was, and that it would never ever happen again, that the world would end before he'd give up on her, That she didn't need to change, and he knew, oh how he knew, how full and open her heart was. That she had loved him without condition, without ultimatum. That she was worthy, very, very worthy of being loved.

He turned the ignition and watched as she walked slowly back to the building before pulling out. He saw her, in his rear view mirror, turn to look at him drive away, before making her way inside.

The woman who'd once told him she was jealous of him, and all their friends because of their ability to lose themselves in love had surpassed them all.

Like two doomed ships that pass in storm, we had crossed each other's way: but we made no sign, we said no word, we had no word to say. Oscar Wilde.

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