Just something that I found amusing, and I hope you guys enjoy it to.
Disclaimer: All rights go to respected owners, meaning Marvel and Disney.
Operation Diverted Cookie Jar
*Set before Season 3, when the Ultimates still bunked at Peter's house because of the destruction of the helicarrier*
Peter wondered what heroes were supposed to do when all criminal activity seemed to cease. It was Saturday, around noon, yet he was sitting in his room fiddling with one of his web-shooters, while Danny was mediating on the floor in the corner. The smell of Danny's odd incents filled the room, while they didn't smell like vanilla, it wasn't unpleasant. In fact, it left Peter having a clearer head.
Which is why he was wondering why he was sitting on his bed, when he could be outside web-slinging among his playground of buildings and bridges. He and his team had no training planned today; Nick Fury had problems he was dealing with, with the Avengers, leaving the teens training-free.
All the thieves, and muggers in New York must have decided it was much too good a day to rob a poor tourist of their wallet, and all the nefarious villains that seemed too often come jeering for attention were either hiding in the knucker holes, or bound up nice and pretty in a S.H.E.I.L.D cell.
Everything was just…peaceful. Something Peter was not used to. He readjusted his position on the bed, twiddling with a screwdriver between his fingers as he played around with the web cartridges. "You are restless, my friend." Danny spoke from his corner of the room, still meditating with his eyes softly closed. "Perhaps you should join me. Meditating is a wonderful way to clear your head, and calm ones soul."
Peter was used to Danny's odd fortune cookie statements by now, and just shook his head. "Nah, I'm good." He said, "Just bored." Peter looked out of the window, and debated on if he should just leave the house and go to his city. Web-slinging was always so much more fun than being cooped in a house, smelling incents and 'calming his soul'.
But Peter promised Aunt May he wouldn't be going anywhere today, she's been worried about him with how much time he spends away from home (which Peter whole-heartedly blames Fury for-not that he could tell Aunt May that though). She was grocery shopping with Ava, and Luke right now. Leaving Peter, Danny, and Nova at home.
Sam was downstairs playing video games, Peter would go play too, but he didn't want to deal with Sam's attitude. But Danny wasn't proving any less interesting, and Peter felt like climbing the walls of boredom. And he could do it!
The only sounds emitting from inside the house would be the occasional shout from Nova, as he obliterated pixelated video game characters. "TAKE THAT COMMANDER GOZAR! HAHAHAHA! ZAP! ZAP! DIIIIIIIE!" Peter shivered, there's only so much a guy can take.
But other than that, it was unnaturally quiet and, dare he say it, calm within the house hold? Something he hasn't experienced since the rest of his team moved in with him, after the helicarrier went CRASH! SPLASH! BOOM! It was kind of nice, but it still didn't help his need to do something.
So Peter decided to chance his sanity, and got up from the bed. He hid his web-shooters in his closet, he didn't want Aunt May (or Sam for that matter) finding them. He's broken too many web-shooters to Sam, Danny knew where he hid them, but the guy was trustworthy. He'd never sell out Peter…for the sake of his precious webs Peter hoped not.
"I'll be downstairs," Peter decided to inform Danny, just because it felt right. Danny nodded his head, humming a small "Mmhm" And kept to his meditating. Peter hurried out of the room, making sure to close the door behind, effectively containing the odd smelling candles within the premises of his bedroom. He hurried down the stairs, where the incoherent sounds coming from Sam's mouth got louder.
Peter rolled his eyes, "Easy there Bucket-head, don't want to hurt yourself." He said, walking through the living room (purposely in front of Sam on his way) and into the kitchen. "Whatever Bug Breath, I'm finally beating this level. HAHAHA! DIE!" Peter rolled his eyes again, and rummaged through the fridge for something to satisfy his growing spider hunger.
He sniffed at a container of meat loaf, before wrinkling his nose and stuffing it back among the other contents, and bringing out a bowl of soup from the night before. "Did Aunt May say when she was going to be back?" Peter asked, putting the soup in the microwave.
"Erm…I don't-uh…know…she-whatever! Stop distracting me Web Head!" came his drawn-away answer. Peter huffed, and waited impatiently for his soup to heat up. He slouched against the kitchen cupboard, holding his head up lazily with a hand. Where was a psychotic, blood-thirsty, probable mentally challenged villain when he needed one?
When his soup finally was warm enough, Peter grabbed it and traveled back into the living room. He sat on the couch next to Sam, and watched the teen punch the controls to his game paddle while slurping away his soup. They didn't say much, Peter sometimes pointing out flaws in Sam's attack, while Sam told him to shut his trap.
Soon Peter's soup was gone, and the bowl sat empty on the coffee table. That was not nearly enough to feed him, but there was nothing else. Well, but meat loaf, and no offense to Aunt May, but he decided to just wait until she got back before resorting back to finishing off the leftover.
So it was a relief when the door opened, and Aunt May announced "We're home!" as she walked in the house, groceries in hand, with Ava and Luke trailing behind her. "Finally!" Peter exclaimed, jumping from the couch and scoured over the newly retrieved food over-flowing his cupboard.
"Ah, I am so hungry!" Peter groaned, searching through the bags. But Aunt May flicked his eager hands away while tsk'ing playfully. "Not until dinner," she scolded. Peter childishly pouted, but broke out into a grin when Aunt May added, "Sam, Danny and I are baking some cookies before though," her eyes glinted mischievously, and she smirked.
"You don't say?" Peter muttered, sharing a look with Ava and Luke, who smirked back at him. From inside the living room Sam called, "Oh yeah! Chocolate chip cookies for the winner!"
They all shared another look, "But after the groceries are put away." Aunt May said. It wasn't long before everything was put away in their designated places, even Sam turned off his game, and Danny put off his meditating to help. Once everything was clean, Aunt May, Danny, and Sam stood in the kitchen; arms were crossed over their chest and they examined Peter, Ava, and Danny with skeptical, but amused, looks. "We've got some baking to do," Aunt May said. "If you please," she shooed them away.
Peter motioned for the others to follow him, "Of course," he smirked, and they all went upstairs into Peter's bedroom. Once the door was securely shut, they all gathered onto Peter's bed. "What's the plan Spidey?" Luke asked.
"First things first," Peter said, sitting up straighter on the bed, "Ava keep your cat ears open, we don't want any snoops hearing in on our confidential business." Ava nodded, and Peter could have sworn he saw her ears twitch.
Nodding in satisfaction, Peter leaned in a little closer, pulling an old marker board onto his lap. "Okay troops," Peter started in a hushed whisper. "I've been working on a new plan. Here's the kitchen," Peter drew a rough drawing of the kitchen, "And here are the most likely positions of Team Sugar Rush." Peter drew three X's, representing Aunt May, Sam, and Danny. "This new plan requires actions, and fast thinking. Team I introduce you to…Operation Diverted Cookie Jar!"
Downstairs, Aunt May watch Peter, Luke, and Ava hurry upstairs. Right when they were out of earshot, or visual, Aunt May turned to her 'soldiers' while dumping a little flour on the cupboard, "Okay, bring it in Team," she said. They all huddled over the cupboard, Danny making sure to keep an eye on the stairs leading to Peter's room.
Aunt May drew a picture of the kitchen in the flour, "Here's the battlefield," she said, "Team Cookie Monster have gotten smarter in their attacks recently, and so we've got to pay attention. I'll keep an eye on the stairs," Aunt May drew a circle, representing her, near the stairs. "Danny and Sam, you guys keep a close watch on the two doors leading into the kitchen," Aunt May drew circles to represent them as well.
"We won't know what to expect from them, but I suggest for a plan; Peter is the leader, he'll be giving orders, once you have a visual on him, attack. See any of the others, give a warning, and don't let them get past you. We won't know when they plan on attacking, so keep eyes, and ears open. Go team!"
"Yes Ma'am!" Danny and Sam echoed, saluting Aunt May. Well Sam said 'Yes Ma'am." Danny bowed and said "Namaste." This was pretty much 'Yes Ma'am' to Aunt May.
The women nodded, pleased. "Now let's get baking." The three got to their jobs. Ingredients were brought out, butter, milk, sugar, chocolate chips etc…while always maintaining a clear visual on their assigned tasks. It wasn't until the dough was made, and ready to be baked when Team Cookie Monster showed them.
Sam heard a small creak, and he glared the door opened to reveal the living room where something darted barely out of his sight. But he did catch sight of a strong, muscle packed arm. Sam's eyes widened, "I've got visual on Luke!" he warned.
"I see Peter!" Danny adds from his side of the kitchen.
"Get ready team! Their attacking." Aunt May says. From his hiding place, Peter ran out into the open, carrying a mighty, sturdy…mop in his hands, his defense. Danny smiled, bracing himself against the mop. Peter swung (softly) and Danny dodged to the side. He lunged for the broom by Peter, and brought it up in time to block another attack from Peter.
They both laughed, while exchanging blows. Luke ran out as well, Sam and Aunt May rushed to meet him, both wielding wire whisks and wood spoons. Luke grabbed a spatula, and pan; using them to attack back, and block swings. "Surrender?" Aunt May prompted, aiming for his hand.
"Never!" Luke vowed, blocking her attacking, and knocking Sam's means of defense from his hand. Sam yelped when Luke swung at him again, "AH! I've been disarmed! Get him Aunt May!" Aunt May took Sam's place, and Luke and her parried. "Where's Ava?" Sam noted, noticing the absent girl in Team Cookie Monster.
Aunt May glanced around a little, before a noise had her reeling around. Ava climbed through the kitchen window, going for the bowl of cookie dough sitting helplessly on the cupboard. "NO!" Sam cried.
Aunt May ran to go stop her, but Luke positioned his spatula over her throat, and held her back. "I don't think so," he laughed. Back where Danny and Peter were mop/broom fighting, Danny had backed Peter into a corner. While Aunt May was distracted, they pulled some of their superhero moves out.
Danny threw an expert kick, which Peter barely managed to dodge, and reeled around to stop a blow from the broom thanks to the helpful tingling in his school. "Your spider-sense is proving difficult, but all resistance proves futile in the end." Danny pointed out, laughing a little. Peter laughed too, "Yeah, want to know what else is futile?" Peter quipped, before dropping down to his hands and swiping Danny's feet out from under him. "This fight." Peter finished, hovering the tip of his mop over Danny's chest.
Danny lifted his hands up in defeat, "Your right," he said, before smirking and knocking Peter's feet out from under him as well. "It was," Danny laughed, pointing his broom back at Peter.
Peter laughed back, but exclaimed "Nice move." But a wailing brought them back to the present.
Ava held the bowl of cookie dough above her head in victory; Sam was on the ground next to her, playfully sobbing into his hands. Peter and Luke pumped their fists and joined in her victorious cries. Aunt May took a weak step forward, before dramatically falling to her knees sobbing a whimpered "No!" Danny hung his head in defeat.
Team Cookie Monster whooped, and marched around the kitchen. Ava held the bowl of cookie dough proudly in her hands, while Luke and Peter trailed behind her with spoons in their hands. Team Sugar Rush rose to their feet, and admitted defeat to the others.
"Here's a gift, in honor of your victory," Aunt May said, before grabbing a hand full of flour and rubbing it into Peter's hair. Her nephew gasped in surprise, and stumbled away laughing. The next few moments was a flurry of white, and shrieks of laughter. And when the flour dust cleared away, 6 people stood breathless with laughter, completely covered in white flour.
The rest of the day was filled with them lounging on couch, eating cookie dough, and leaving handprints and trails of flour throughout the house.
Team Cookie Monster one that day, but Team Sugar Rush would be ready for next time!
Pretty much Team Cookie Monsters (Peter, Luke, and Ava) try to get the cookie dough from Team Sugar Rush (Aunt May, Sam, and Danny) before the cookies can be baked.
It just came to me, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Be sure to check out my Ultimate Spider-Man fanfiction "Animal Instincts: Infected Humanity" if you hadn't already read it! Thanks! :D