Matsumoto Rangiku awoke, gasping and putting her hand over face, feeling the wet stains of tears. She soon realized it was only a dream - that she still lived in a world without him there.
But of course he wouldn't be there. She had killed him herself.
She distinctly remembered that day. There was chaos everywhere. The forces of the shinigami were trying to defeat Aizen, once and for all.
Rangiku wondered if it was fate that she had been outside, alone with him.
They had merely stood there, watching each other, both wanting to say something. But there was nothing.
Finally, he spoke.
"Rangiku…" He hadn't wanted her to see. See him like that. She didn't know what to think when she saw him in that form. He was like Aizen had become. Like a Hollow.
Well, technically, she thought bitterly, he was a Hollow. She thought back to what happened after that…
"I…" She had let out a choked word, trying to find something - anything! - to say to him. But she couldn't.
There was nothing to say.
She was absolutely crushed by his action. He had become a Hollow - like Aizen. Why did he do that? How could he have done that? How could he have done that to her?
Still, she had never wanted to hurt him - not seriously anyway.
But that was before he took control.
Matsumoto shivered at the memory. She remembered it as vividly as one ever could. She remembered every bit of it. Unfortunately.
The Hollow had taken over. It was said that Ichigo's Hollow side had done the same - taken over his body, become a killing machine.
But it was just as bad being attacked.
She remembered blood spurting from her wound as a sword tore through her skin. She remembered the insane laughing as she cried out in pain. But most of all, she remembered the horrible mask that replaced his ever-smiling face.
And that, most of all, was why she had to kill him.
She couldn't bear to look at that face on his body. She couldn't. She couldn't!
So she had dodged his blows, and then -
Stabbed him.
She clearly remembered all the blood that had gushed out of the wound, onto her face, into her hair, giving her bloodstained hands. She had been crying.
"I'm sorry…" she had sobbed. Her voice had been tiny and high, like a child scared of the monster in her closet. Somewhere in her head, a voice shouted, "I loved you! I loved you!" This only made the pain worse.
Then, quietly, she had whispered his name.
He fell to the ground, no longer moving. Tears ran down her face, the impact of his... condition… not sinking in yet. Trying to find things to keep her distracted, she had stared at the mask. She noticed it was slightly askew, and touched it, pulling it off.
He was smiling. He was smiling.
This one thing caused her to break down, to drop her sword with a clatter, to sob and cry and bury her face with her bloodstained hands, tears diluting the deep red liquid.
It had been Hitsugaya who found her. He hadn't known exactly what was wrong... until he saw her bloodstained hands, and the bloodied sword at her side, and the dead body in front of her.
Then he knew.
"Matsumoto… let's go," he had said softly. His voice woke her up from a sort of trance, and she obediently followed Hitsugaya. The entire way, she was completely and utterly silent - a thing Hitsugaya would normally have been very happy to see. But he knew that when Matsumoto was silent, something was wrong.
Matsumoto had become a better vice captain- she would do any work, volunteer for work, just so her mind couldn't wander to him. She no longer took naps on the couch; he haunted her.
However, today Hitsugaya had put his foot down and done all the work, Matsumoto recalled. So now she merely lay on her bed, wiping off the tears from the dreams of him.
She decided she needed to calm down, so she flipped over and turned on a "radio," a gift from Rukia from the human world.
A gentle song was playing, a soft voice singing the sorrowful words…
"Even though I'm the sacrifice
You won't try for me, not now
Though I'd die to know you love me
I'm all alone
Isn't someone missing me?"
Strangely, Matsumoto felt tears rise in her eyes as the meaning of the words swirled around her.
"And if I bleed, I'll bleed
Knowing you don't care…"
Matsumoto was reminded yet again of the blood flowing out his wound…
"And if I sleep just to dream of you
I'll wake without you there…"
Matsumoto let out a sob, for this is exactly what had been happening. She had dreamed of him, dreamed of his smiles, his laughter… and then she woke up, and was hit by the cold reality.
She stopped in time to hear the last lines of the song. She swore, along with the soft voice of the song, she could hear his voice along with it.
"Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?"
Matsumoto sobbed into her pillow, burying her face in her hands.
Yes. Someone does miss you. I miss you.
She cried herself to sleep, as she had done quite a few times before. But this time, he did not visit her.
End
The song is Missing by Evanescence. I hoped you like this fic. It's my first Bleach fic ever, so… please review? Bye, y'all.