TITAN AE FLIGHT TRIP
A/N: I don't own this, I WANT TO!!! IF I DID PREED WOULDN'T HAVE TO DIE, I'D JUST LET STITH BEAT THE SNOT OUT OF HIM!!!!!!!!!!
( Akima, and Korso are sitting in the cockpit of the VALKYRIE talking when...)
Me: Hello!
Korso: Who the...
Me: Don't say it, Skipper, I don't want to hear it!
Korso: Excuse me, miss, but did you just call me 'Skipper'?
Me: Yeah, why? Do watch Gillagn's Island?
Akima: Oh yeah, that old show, ancient humans used to watch in the 1970s on something called a TV.
Me: Finally, someone's been paying attention to my time- er in my day we had something called Nick at Night.
Preed: (Walks into the room.) Ah, finally I can get a chance to shoot that dang bug- ( finally notices I'm in the room) oh great, who's this Captain, the new air-head speacilst?
Me: Watch it, Metal Head.
Preed: Make me.
Me: Hmm, you know Preed I've been wondering, does that metal plate enable you to tune into radio stations? ( Knocks on the metal plate on his head.)
Preed: Ow, don't you dare do that again.
Me: Oh, what , this? ( Raps hand on the metal plate again.)
Preed: (Angerly) Yes that! Captain, if you need me, I'll be taking an aspirin and going to find something to shoot. (Glares at me as he walks out.)
Akima: ( To me) Be afraid...
Korso: (Looks out the window.) Be very afraid.
Me: (Calmly looks out the window.) Oh look Drej......DREJ?!
Korso: Battle stations, people!
Me: And I do what?
Korso: Go get Preed, he's the other weapons specialist, we need him, and hurry!!
Me: Fine. ( Walks outside the ship to an area, full of holes, and try not to laugh at the tigger- happy Preed.) Yo, Preed, Korso's looking for you.
Preed: (Paying no attention to me.) Come just a little bit closer, bug, closer than that. PERFECT! (Aims, fires and misses.) No, I missed again!! ( Shoots 20 times at the bug and it just won't die!)
Me: Whoa, whoa, whoa, nice shootin' Tex! Yeah if you didn't know there are over a 100 Drej stingers out there waiting to shoot our butts off.
Preed: ( Still not paying attention.) Yeah, sure tell me later 4 - eyes! ( continues to try to kill the bug)
ME: All right, leave to a human to do an alien's job. ( Walks back in to the ship.)
Korso: Where's Preed?
Me: ( Grins) John Wayne's too trigger- happy to get over here.
Korso: Great, just great, now who's going to work this?
Me: ( Sits in a chair and acts like Dr. Spock form Star Trek.) I don't know... Beam me up Scottie!
Gune: Yes Captain!
Korso: ( Looks at me.) Do you know how to work one of the suckers? ( Points to the gun controls.)
Me: ( Sits at the controls) No. ( Presses fire button and shoots a Drej ship.)
Korso: You do now.
Me: Sweet! ( Shoots five Drej at one time.)
Stith: Maybe Preed will get out of a job.
Cale: Let's hope so.
Later...
Preed: Well I finally managed to shoot that little bug!
Cale: It took you 5 hours to shoot a bug?
Korso: Preed, I'd like you to meet a new weapons specialist. ( Gestures toward me.)
Preed: Oh no, you didn't...
Me: Yep.
Preed: How could you hire HER?
Korso: She managed to take down 50 Drej in two shots.
Preed: So I'm fired?
Korso: Not nessicerally....
Review if you want to know what Preed's new job is!