I do not own Yuuri on Ice or any of the characters. However, like the rest of us, their story has touched my heart. Here the 2nd story I wrote to contribute to this site. I have several short stories already written and was encouraged to share them with you. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks.
Russia
Viktor and Yuuri arrived in St. Petersburg late in the evening jet lagged, but happy. Viktor was thrilled to be home and to share that home with Yuuri. But not tonight. Tonight, they were picked up by a staff person who worked for Coach Yakov. They would be staying in the large house Yakov owned next to the rink in the interim until they could find an apartment close by. Sponsors had already signed contracts with Viktor and much to his surprise, Yuuri as well. This was good because there were very limited rooms available at the dorm house, mostly for underage skaters like Yurio, and Mila, who was 17 but no one wanted her out on her own. Georgi rented an apartment with some college athletes nearby. The boarders would be arriving in about two weeks. With the last of vacation time, Yurio was with his beloved grandfather in Moscow, and Mila with her parents and little brother several hours away.
After a good night sleep that even for Viktor lasted well into the next day, it was time to eat breakfast, or brunch by then, then go out into the city. This was Viktor's home so naturally he took the lead, showing Yuuri some sights while apartment hunting. After about a week, they settled on a small two-bedroom apartment 5 blocks from the bus route that would take them to Yakov's training facility. They wanted something small, meaning less expensive, for when they were away competing in other countries. Viktor and Yuuri had their winnings from competition as well as the sponsorship money. However, their time as competitive figure skaters was short. They chose a less expensive place to live for now, preferring to invest in the future once they decided where they would live permanently. For all of Viktor's flakiness, this was one area he showed amazing foresight. Yuuri agreed whole heartedly as long as any future they planned was together.
They were in their room for the last night, packing up odds and ends when they heard a familiar voice from the open door. "So, you are back." Yurio stated as he leaned against the door frame. "I knew you couldn't stay off the ice Viktor." There was a sarcastic edge to his voice but the roommates knew the difference between his sarcastic tone and true anger.
"Yurio, glad to see you. You are back just in time to help us move tomorrow. This is just a few of our things, the rest is the basement" Viktor replied cheerfully. He was just so happy to be home. Yuuri smiled to himself. "Yea right, like I care." With that he was gone, down the hall towards the empty kitchen hoping for a snack. He was after all, still growing.
Later in the evening, it was quiet thru out the house. Viktor and Yuuri were lying in bed, curled up with each other but not yet asleep. "I hope you will grow to love St. Petersburg as much as I do. Once we are settled there are some places I think you might like see. Is there anywhere in particular you wish to go?" Viktor asked.
"Can we go to the ocean before we start training? Yuuri replied. Viktor pulled him closer into his embrace, kissed his forehead and made a low hmmm noise in consent. The ocean was a special place to both of them. Yuuri was starting to get drowsy when Viktor, still keyed up about being home began to speak.
"I was one of the youngest skaters to come here. I was almost 12 and had already proven myself in my region. I needed to come here and train with Yakov if I wanted to enter the world stage. Here I skated for a year then began the junior championships. This place has so many good memories for me. I grew up here, became who I am because of this place, and because of Coach Yakov. I know he yells a lot, but don't take it personally. He is like Yurio, how he seems so angry all the time, but that is just the way he is. They are both passionate about skating and the people they let into their life. Besides, Yakov knows how important you are to me."
That statement made Yuuri nervous which woke him up as his mind began to spin. He wasn't sure how their relationship would go over here in Russia. Not everyone was as open to this as his family and their skating friends were. If he was to be honest, there was an ongoing evolving list of worries in Yuuri's mind about moving here. However, his love for Viktor overrode his fears so…. here he was. That and he had lived away from home for so long that being home was a nice treat, unlike Viktor to whom the extended stay in Japan was a treat. He hoped he would feel more settled once they were in their own place. It was then that Yuuri realized Viktor was sleeping. That was good, he needed it. Yuuri wasn't tired so rather than toss and turn, waking his beloved, he got up and wandered down the hall. He saw the lights on in Yurio's room and knocked on impulse.
The door opened and in a split second, Yurio's eyes changed from worried sadness, to surprise to irritation. "What do you want Pork Cutlet Bowl. It's late".
"Hi Yurio. I know, sorry. I just couldn't sleep and saw your light on. I can leave if you want." Yuuri replied as he began to step away. Much to his surprise, Yurio got a conspiring look on his face and said "Want to go get some ice cream? I know a place not too far from here that stays open late." Apparently, his earlier kitchen raid was a bust.
"Sure." Surprise was an understatement but after Yuuri changed back into jeans, the 2 were walking down the side walk with the lights of the city twinkling all around them. It was only 10:30 at night but it felt later; maybe because there weren't too many people out for ice cream. Once seated, Yuuri had to admit it was some of the best ice-cream he had in a long time. Mostly he didn't allow himself the indulgence because he gained weight so easily, but also this place made it themselves so it was a good splurge. He took his time enjoying it, knowing he would not come back here soon.
Yuuri glanced up at Yurio who was lost in thought. His eyes told an unhappy story when his mouth wasn't turned down in a sneer. Finally, Yurio asked "how is your grandfather?"
"Fine" Yurio snapped too quickly. Yuuri just looked at him, not saying a word.
They walked back to the dorm house in silence. Yuuri was concerned, knowing something was wrong but too intimidated to say much else. At Yurio's door, Yuuri thanked him for taking him there. It was a nice way to continue to get to know his new home. "My grandfather is not well" was all Yurio said in words, but his body expressed such despair. Yuuri walked into Yurio's room and sat on the only chair available by the desk. "What?!" Yurio exclaimed in surprise annoyance. Yuuri knew he needed to be there so just looked at him in silence. Yurio shut the door and sat on the bed.
It all came flooding out then, how his grandfather's health had been bad for years, everyone knew that. But it was worse and didn't look like he was going to get better. "He is everything to me you know? He raised me when first my father split, then my mother." He raised me until he had to send me away to train with Yakov. I know we both want me to be here but it is so hard to be away from him." Without realizing it, Yurio was hugging one of his stuffed cats thrown around his bed from adoring fans. As he spoke he squeezed it tighter, hardening his eyes and thoughts from the pain in his heart. He said nothing else and as much as Yuuri wanted to stay, he knew to do so would bring on defensive walls in the young 16-year-old.
As he stood he quietly replied "I'm sorry Yurachka, truly." Yuri looked up in surprise at his given name being used. Yuuri reached out, placed a hand on his shoulder, looked into those hurt, angry green eyes peeking out behind thick blond bangs and simply said "I'm glad you told me." He would have liked to say more but instead gave the teen's shoulder a squeeze then left the room.
Back in their own room, Yuuri quickly dressed for bed and snuggled in next to Viktor, trying not to wake him. He mumbled something in his sleep, reached for Yuuri to pull him closer and was quiet again. Yuuri's last thoughts were of Yurio. That's tough for anyone, let alone a 16-year-old kid. His heart expanded and Yuuri knew, whatever happened, he would be there for Yurio…... if he allowed it.
The next morning came very quickly in Yuuri's mind but Viktor was up and therefore felt Yuuri should be too. He groaned and stretched knowing sleep time was over. Today they would move to their own place. Viktor's excitement was contagious. The apartment was furnished so it was just all their combined boxes. Yuuri remembered helping move Viktor into the room at his parent's hot springs Yutopia. It was going to be a long day. In the end it went quicker than they thought. Georgi showed up with one of his college roommates who had borrowed a truck. With the 4 of them, then Yurio making an appearance for the last load, they were all in by midafternoon. To thank everyone, they headed down to a local restaurant for food and drinks, on Viktor and Yuuri. Once training started there would be precious little time for things like this and late-night ice cream. Yuuri was careful as always but agreed to have one drink Viktor would not take no for an answer to. It was a local favorite made with a special Vodka distilled in St. Petersburg. He had never been much for vodka but found this to be exceptional. Viktor grinned in an 'I told you so' kind of way.
It was getting late when the group said good night. Viktor walked close to Yuuri but did not reach for his hand. It might not be safe. "Did you enjoy yourself?" He asked.
"Yes, very much. I take it you have been there before?"
"Oh yes" Viktor laughed. "I was younger than Yurio when I first went there for their awesome food. I have known the owners for years. As I got older it was the vodka that appealed to me." He went on to tell stories of vacation time and the trouble he and some of his nonskating friends got into. By the time they arrived at the apartment building, Yuuri was laughing so hard his sides hurt. Viktor smiled at the memories but appreciated where his life was now. Unlocking the main door, he let Yuuri precede him into the building and up the stairs. They were on the 3rd floor which was the top. The small corner apartment had plenty of windows for light and fresh air. It was perfect for the two skaters and the large poodle who shared their lives. They walked into the entry way with the front hall closet to their left and a few steps away was the door to their guest bedroom on the right. From there spread out before them was an airy, open concept living room, kitchen and eating area with 10-foot ceilings and oversized windows. There was a short hallway off the same wall as the spare bedroom but farther down the living room that housed the bathroom and a decently sized master bedroom with more windows. The building was located in a quaint, older residential part of the city that boasted a neighborhood park in which to walk Makkachin or go for their morning run.
Once inside they followed the maze thru stacks of boxes to get to the sofa. It was too early for bed but the TV wasn't getting connected to the satellite dish until tomorrow. Instead Viktor switched on the radio, got himself another drink and sat down. Yuuri was responding to a text from his parents, telling them about the apartment and friends who helped them move in. Good wishes were passed on both sides from his parents and Viktor, then Yuuri turned off his phone. It didn't take long to find himself pulled into Viktor's embrace. They sat companionably together, talking about where they wanted to put things and where the grocery store was located. Yuuri wanted to go there soon so they didn't eat out all the time. Viktor admitted growing up as he did, his skills were limited but he had a few recipes up his sleeve. Yuuri assured him he looked forward to trying them. "Don't get too excited" Viktor laughed. Not getting excited proved to be impossible as that statement was followed by a series of wonderfully passionate kisses. Yuuri would have liked to make some sort of innuendo but the thought left as quickly as it came as they proceeded to the bedroom.
As anticipated, light flooded the apartment the next morning. This delighted the ever morning loving Viktor. Yuuri tried to roll over, thinking dark curtains may be in order. Viktor managed to let Yuuri sleep until 9 then just couldn't stand it. He walked into the bedroom and sat gently on the bed to begin to wake Yuuri, just as he did back in Hasetsu. "Yuuri" he called softly as he began to stroke his fingers up Yuuri's arm. "It's time to get up. It's late." The word "late" penetrated Yuuri's mind and he bolted up in bed thinking he was late for training. Viktor couldn't help but laugh at his round-eyed expression, hair sticking up all over. Yea, well, let's see who surprises who Yuuri thought as he pounced on Viktor, knocking him off balance so he landed on his back with Yuuri on top. That's when he found out Viktor was ticklish. An all-out war ensued and after several minutes, there were blankets and pillows everywhere with the two of them intertwined, laughing uncontrollably.
Overall it was a busy week settling in, buying groceries, and even getting unofficially on the ice. By then everyone was back and had the same idea. It was time to train in anticipation of the upcoming competitive season.
They all fell back into the routine with the addition of Yuuri in the mix. Georgi's training time was opposite to Yuuri's so they didn't interact much. Mila was a tease but also busy with her own life and friends when not skating. Victor was currently on the ice. "You have gotten soft over the past year Viktor" yelled coach Yakov. He was in full business mode and wanted his top skater in top form and he wanted it now. Much to Viktor's dismay, he was not in as good a shape as he thought he was. But his body knew what to do, it would just take some conditioning. Besides, he had skated almost every day while training Yuuri last season. "You will have to work extra hard to win Viktor." That pissed him off so he skated harder. Training with Yuuri then weights would be next for the day. Yuuri walked in just as Yakov made that last comment and Yuuri blanched feeling it was his fault. "If he hadn't coached me last year…"
He finished stretching and laced up his skates, still worrying about Coach's last comment when Viktor appeared at his side. Yuuri looked up and realized the rink was empty. This was their time. Taking a drink of water Viktor noticed the anxiety on Yuuri's face as he got to his feet. He put the water down on the bench and pulled Yuuri close. That always works to still his mind. "Are you ok?" Viktor asked gently. He knew this move to a different country, training with a group of people instead of the safety and solitude of Ice Castle was hard for Yuuri.
Yuuri took a deep slow breath, enjoying the moment with Viktor, then replied "lets skate". Over the next hour they made real progress on Yuuri's short program. The foot sequence was the most challenging to date, yet that was his strong suit and already there was a flow in the movements that caused Viktor to be excited to see it when more developed. As before, the jumps were in the second half and today they finished training with several jumps including the quad flip. Usually Viktor would have trained Yurio or Mila with jumps first then foot work, but with Yuuri he realized last year, the opposite was better. He had amazing stamina and the foot work calmed his mind so the jumps came easier by the time they got to them.
Yuuri had completed a number of different jumps better than ever before when out of breath he looked over at Viktor in triumph. Viktor skated over, right into his arms. By now, Yuuri was ready so they didn't fall over like in the early days. "How did that feel Yuuri?" Viktor asked.
"Better" replied Yuuri, "the landings seem more natural". He pulled the younger man to him and from familiarity, Yuuri put his head to the crook of Viktor's neck and relaxed for a moment, knowing his silver haired lover would support the two of them.
Coach Yakov had been watching the practice session from the second-floor windows where offices were located. He couldn't hear what was said but wanted to see Viktor's coaching that could bring a talented but very insecure skater to take silver at the Grand Prix Final. While he didn't respect Viktor's decision to coach, he had to respect the outcome. Just then movement across the rink caught his eye as Yuri entered.
"Hey you two, it's my time on the ice too. Get a room." Embarrassed, Yuuri quickly skated away to continue working on his foot work. Viktor skated by, irritated with the young teenager. Looks said it all on both sides as they passed each other. Pretty much that was training. Days filled with running, weight training, skating, skating, coach Yakov yelling at everyone including Yuuri and more skating. Nerves often ran short so the one day off was a blessing to everyone.
The following Friday, Yuuri was having a bad day. It actually started Thursday night. After a long day at the rink, a bunch of skaters decided to get dinner. The power couple, as they appeared to be labeled by the international press, had been back in Russia for a about month. While Yuuri loved the corner 3rd floor apartment they shared, the rest was all a bit overwhelming for the Japanese man. His understanding of the Russian language consisted of knowing what various endearments meant when whispered in his ear by his silver haired lover. While pleasant, those as well as the rudimentary words of basic conversation hardly allowed him to understand let alone join in on the conversation flying around the table. Viktor asked a few times if he was ok to which he denied all anxiety and informed him he understood the gist of the conversation. He didn't. But the best way to learn was to do exactly this, listen. His English improved the same way though he started out knowing a lot more English than this.
As he partially listened, he observed. He especially watched the love of his life begin to relax his shoulders as he laughed with his comrades. Life had been stressful. They knew it would be with Viktor resuming his own skating career while still staying on as his coach. But knowing it and living it were two different things entirely. Yuuri had watched as Viktor literally fell into bed every night exhausted, only to wake up the next day and push himself harder. Yuuri thought if he did more, tried harder, maybe it would help. He did most of the cooking, laundry and shopping to help ease his Viktor's work load. With skating and training full time, it was a lot. He was lost in thought so did not notice another set of eyes observing him.
Yurio at 16 had grown only an inch, barely filling that out. The kid could eat, but where it all went, no one really knew since he was still nicknamed the Ice Fairy of Russia. Yurio preferred the other nickname, Russia's Ice Tiger because everyone knew he was a force to be reckoned with both on and off the ice. It was he who noticed Yuuri's discomfiture, obviously not understanding much of the conversation. He was about to suggest they switch to English when he saw Viktor lean into Yuuri to put and arm around the back of his chair. That seemed to ease the piggy somewhat so he said nothing.
The next morning Yuuri woke to an empty apartment. He also realized he was a little bit late. A quick protein bar and taking his coffee to go, he left the apartment rushed but on time to catch the bus to the rink. He thought he would be fine, until he realized he got off one stop too soon. Now he was several miles from his destination. He had a vague idea of the direction to go so finished his coffee, shoved the go mug in the side pocket of his back pack and took off at a run. 30 minutes later, winded and quite late, he arrived having only gotten lost twice. Viktor was worried, which was evident in his face as he brushed his silvery bangs out of his eyes for probably the 100th time while looking for his skater. He spotted him exclaiming, "There you are! Where were you? Yakov is about to have an aneurysm over this. We are both late now!"
"I know. Sorry, sorry. I got off at the wrong stop and got turned around while running here. I'll get my skates on and be right in." He replied, blushing furiously at admitting his short comings. Viktor gave him a quick hug around the shoulders before hurrying down the hall to the ice. When putting in his contacts, Yuuri tore one and after 5 minutes of searching his bag, he realized he didn't have any more on him. His spare set he remembered were on the bathroom vanity waiting to be thrown in his bag. In his haste this morning, he forgot to do that. With a sigh, he went with what he had but his vision and depth perception were a little off.
As he walked in to the rink to put his water down Yakov was in full swing, yelling at pretty much everyone. Yuuri wasn't the only one late today. As he was about to take off his guards, Yakov turned on him, "YUURI! ARE YOU REALLY COMING TO THE ICE WITH OUT STRETCHING? WE DON'T NEED AN INJURY. NOW GO STRETCH." Yuuri's face blanched at being singled out by Viktor's coach in front of every one. This was a huge difference from skating alone with Viktor in Hasetsu. Viktor was about to skate over to him when again Yakov yelled that his time as a skater was NOT done yet so get moving. Viktor rolled his eyes for Yuuri, knowing his coach could not see him, then proceeded to do as he was told and skated away. Yuuri's stomach was in knots but he stretched which helped calm him down a little. After that he took off his guards, got on the ice to warm up, trying to be invisible.
Maybe things would have turned out differently had practice gone well. It didn't. Between his impaired eyesight, being yelled at, late, missing his stop, it just wasn't Yuuri's day. His foot work while still good was not flowing like it normally did. As for the jumps, well, the ice came up to meet his falling body more times than he wanted to count. It was getting old, to slam into the unforgiving ice so often in one day. He was frustrated, irritated and overall having a "Monday, Monday." To him, when you have a Monday on a different day of the week, especially a bad Monday, it was called a "Monday, Monday." He and Pitchit made that up in Detroit. To help deflect the bad mood, they would sing, off key, at the top of their lungs that song by the Mamas and the Papas as they skated around the rink. Coach Calestino wanted to knock their heads together sometimes, but he found it helped one or the other refocus. Yuuri wished his friend was here. He kind of felt alone and a bit overwhelmed.
"Yuuri" Viktor called as he skated towards his distracted student. "I don't know where your head is, but this is not working. Go down to the gym and finish with a work out there. Weights and cardio before you go home. Don't forget to stretch."
"Ok. Sorry Viktor" Yuuri said with his head bowed in defeat. "Will you be heading home with me when I'm done?" He asked kind of hopefully.
"No, not today. Yakov and I have to be in an online coach's meeting then look at the competition standings to see where and when everyone is competing. I will be late tonight." With that, he gave Yuuri a slight pec on the forehead and skated for edge of the ice where they could already hear Yakov yelling for Viktor to hurry up. Yuuri went to the locker room alone to change from skates to sneakers so he could follow his coach's instructions.
There were several people already working out when he arrived at the onsite gym. In the front of the room were treadmills, ellipticals and even a Nordic track for cardio; the rest of the space was filled with weights, and mats. He waved to the few skaters who acknowledged his appearance amongst their midst. Music was playing pretty loud, though there was a friendly banter going on at the same time. Yuuri decided to go for a run on a treadmill to try and settle his racing mind. Within minutes, sweat was dripping and his legs were aching but he ignored the physical discomfort as he ran for several more miles. It's all part of being an elite athlete. By the time he finished weights, most of the other skaters were gone with a few on the treadmill themselves. He stretched out to finish his work out but it did little to make him feel better about his day. Usually stretching helped but not today. As he got up to leave, Yurio was just walking in. The two skater's eyes met, but Yuuri was too dispirited to attempt conversation. He just fist bumped the younger skater and kept walking. He didn't notice Yurio watching him leave with a confused and slightly worried look on his face. He shrugged his shoulders, pulling blond hair into a sloppy pony tail. Pork cutlet bowl was Viktor's problem. He would handle it.
Paying close attention, Yuuri got off the bus at the right stop and walked the five blocks to the apartment. After climbing all three flights of stairs, he was met with an enthusiastic Makkachin who needed to go out. He set down his bag with a sigh, flipped on lights then turned up the heat a little. It was getting dark and the temperature was dropping. Turning back around he walked down the three flights of stairs with Makkachin on her leash so they could go to the nearby park.
While there his phone rang. It was his parents. Keeping an eye on Makkachin, he answered, happy to hear from home. He felt a little homesick especially after the day he was having. "Hi Mom" he started, perking up a bit. Before he could say much else, he heard the tone of her voice and instead asked "What's wrong?"
"Your father slipped today by the hot springs, spraining his bad ankle again. He is on bed rest with it elevated which you know how cranky that makes him when he can't be up and working. Mari and I are covering for him but ugh, what a day. How are you doing dear? How is our Viktor?"
He just stopped in his tracks, causing poor Makkachin to be jerked to a stop as she was still moving along at the pace they had set. She turned to look back at him before being distracted by something only she could smell. He felt so bad. He wished he could be there to lighten the load. Instead he was half way around the world again, skating. He felt a bit guilty. "I'm sorry Mom. I know what a bad patient he is." That made his mother laugh in agreement. "Is there anything I can do?" He asked uselessly. He knew there wasn't.
"Yes. Skate well, practice hard and go get 'em. We will be watching and cheering you on. Say hi to Viktor for us." And with that she had to go as there were late check ins arriving. He sighed and turned for home. Home may be where Viktor is, but Viktor wasn't currently in the apartment and he felt displaced. Back on the third floor, Yuuri was trying to get Makkachin's dinner and water when he felt it begin.
His hands and feet went numb. Oh no. Maybe this isn't happening. Next his lips went numb and his heart began to race. Oh yes, it was happening and from the looks of it, this was going to be a bad one. He hadn't had an anxiety attack in a long time. He hated this feeling but knew he only had moments to find somewhere to ride it out before he was incapacitated. The main living space with its open concept kitchen, eating area and living space was too open and exposed for his needs. His eyes darted frantically around the apartment as his breathing became rapid in time with his increasing heart rate. He raced to their bedroom, sinking down into an unused corner near the foot of the bed. Knees drew up to his chest, hands holding his head. The mental and emotional pain swelled into a tidal wave agony as all the anxiety he had been feeling from the move to such a foreign country set in all at one. His breath came faster and uneven, heart pounding at full speed. An anguished moan escaped his lips as he drew in on himself, eyes squeezing shut, preparing to ride this out.
Meanwhile back at the rink Yakov and Viktor were leaving the office when a surprised Yurio ran into them as he was preparing to go home. He was running his fingers thru his showered wet hair before pulling up his tiger hoodie he bought last year in Hasetsu Japan when he spotted them. "What? You didn't go home with piggy?!" He exclaimed in surprise.
Viktor looked at the younger skater a bit confused by his question but also concerned at the tone in which it was asked. "What? No. I had meetings today. Why?" He asked running his own hand thru his bangs that were in his eyes and promptly fell back into them again by the time he pulled his hand away.
"I saw Yuuri leaving the gym as I entered. He looked awful. I just assumed you two went home together….." Yurio seemed a little lost as he looked back and forth between the two older men.
Viktor turned immediately to his coach and mentor, who had been with him since he was a boy himself. "Yakov. Can you give me a ride home?" He asked even as he was pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialing Yuuri's number. No answer. He tried again. No answer. Now he worried.
"Let's go" Yakov announced as the three of them flew around the building, turning off lights and locking doors. They piled into his car, Viktor riding shot gun, Yuri in the back. Viktor tried to call again but no answer. He drilled Yurio on exactly what he saw. There wasn't much for the boy to add except that he was pale and sort of lost looking. The two Yuri's hadn't spoken and Yurio assumed the other Yuuri was on his way to Viktor to go home together as always, so didn't worry about it anymore. Now he was worried. Yuuri had been alone for hours. Viktor slammed the side of his fist into the car door with a shout of frustration as they hit yet another red light. Between that and the slow drivers who seemed to be on the road that night, he was by then, beyond frustrated.
"Hang on Viktor. We are almost there." Yakov responded gently. He had never seen his star skater quite like this but even he felt the urgency of the moment. Yurio was unusually quiet in the back seat but gave off a sense of a vibrating impatience. The vehicle had hardly stopped in front of the apartment when the two skaters jumped from the car and ran into the building. Viktor had longer legs so took the stairs two at a time. Between his competitive nature and youthful athleticism, Yurio stayed right on his heels the whole way. Yakov waited in the car.
The door was unlocked to the apartment and they were both calling Yuuri's name before crossing the threshold. While they didn't see the young man, they were met by an anxious wining dog which did nothing to dispel their sense of unease. A quick search ensued where they called out Yuuri's name but he was not in the main living area, guest bedroom or the bathroom. Yurio followed Viktor as far as their bedroom door way but stopped short at the sight before him. In the darkened room was a huddled mass in the corner, breathing erratically with the occasional whimper escaping his lips. His eyes were squeezed shut, oblivious to anything going on around him.
Viktor's first impulse was to run to his side but he slowed his powerful stride to a stop for a moment, remembering when this happened once before in Japan. He had walked into an unusually somber onsen only to be met by Mari who informed him in no uncertain terms that Yuuri was in his room having "a moment" as she put it thanks to Viktor yelling at him in practice. Not waiting for more information, Viktor raced to his student's room only to stop short at the sight similar to this one but with Hiroko, Yuuri's Mom, sitting on her knees at her son's side rubbing his back. She had quietly informed Viktor that this was an anxiety attack, not to be alarmed, Yuuri has had them periodically thru out the years. However, before he could help her son, he had to calm himself down first.
It wasn't easy but Viktor did as she said, listening as she explained how anxiety, stress or feeling overwhelmed can set it off. In answer to his question, all she knew was that the last few practices had not gone well and the pressure finally pushed him over the edge. Viktor felt horrible knowing he as part of the problem. Hiroko saw his stricken face. Yakov yelled all the time. He just supposed that was coaching. He told her as much, assuming responsibility, guilt pressing him down. "Well, I would think coaching like parenting requires a variety of techniques depending on the child or student one is dealing with. It's ok Viktor. You two will figure it out. Try to slow your breathing now." Once Viktor had calmed down himself, Hiroko encouraged him to come along side Yuuri and hug him. Viktor gently reached for the stricken man and much to his relief, Yuuri simply collapsed into his chest. Together they helped his breathing come back under control. So focused was he on helping his special skater breath that neither man noticed when Hiroko slipped out of the room, leaving them to get to know each other better thru adversity.
In the seconds it took to see that memory, Viktor was already calming his breathing down and settling his nerves. He heard Yurio behind him ask in a worried, small voice "What is happening to him Viktor?"
"It is an anxiety attack. It's ok. He will be ok in a bit but I have to help him calm down." Yurio never had much problems with anxiety, preferring a direct attack to any perceived threat. This was completely foreign to him and more than unsettling. He could see Yuuri shaking from there. "You can go ahead and go home. I've got this. Tell Yakov we found him." Then more to himself he continued "it's going to be ok."
With that Viktor crossed the dark room, stopping to turn on a small lamp next to the bed. "Yuuuuri" he called soothingly. He approached his shaking lover slowly and dropped to his side. Like before he opened his arms to pull the younger man to him. And like before, Yuuri collapsed bonelessly into his chest.
"I'msorryi'msorry" Viktor heard faintly but couldn't make out the words.
"Yuuri, it's ok. I'm right here."
Again, only a little louder "I'msorry,I'msorry,I'msorry" he seemed to be saying over and over into Viktor's chest.
"You have nothing to be sorry about moya lyubov." He tightened his hold to try to still the shaking in the other man before continuing gently "Let's work on our breathing. Can you do that Yuuri? Come on. Breath with me. In- and out-in-and out. Nice and slow. Come on, you've got this." Viktor continued to coax and encourage until he got a response out of Yuuri.
Meanwhile, a pensive Yurio had returned to the car. Yakov began to drive when Yurio suggested they pick up some soup from a nearby café they had frequented when he had visited last week. Yakov was surprised but pleased at his young protégé's thoughtfulness. He turned in that direction. "Yakov. Have you ever seen someone have an anxiety attack" Yuri asked quietly? Yakov looked over, realizing how upset the teen was.
"Yes. More than once. It isn't pretty that's for sure. And it leaves the person very tired and drained."
Yuri processed this information as they both walked into the café, ordered soup, fresh baked bread with sweet cream butter to go. Yurio was subdued. When they returned he didn't question why Yakov had a key to the building. He jumped out of the car to run the food up to the 3rd floor where he left it on the kitchen counter along with a note. The younger skater locked the apartment door on the way out so no one could enter as undetected as he did. As he jogged down the stairs, he hoped Odabek would be available to Skype. He needed his stoic friend right now. Together, he and Yakov drove off into the night to go home after what felt like a very long day to both men.
Meanwhile, back on the 3rd floor, Yuuri's breathing was gradually changing from jagged and shallow to slowly match what Viktor was doing. "Good job. Perfect Yuuri. Keep breathing with me." Viktor was focused, staying with Yuuri on the floor holding him close until finally the brunet limp with exhaustion, curled up to his chest, fist tangled in the front of Viktor's shirt, face nuzzled in the crook of his neck. He was breathing normally and his heart had stopped its frantic gallop. Yuuri took a deep breath then dared to look up at Viktor.
Viktor smiled, blue eyes filled with love and concern. "Better now?" Yuuri could only nod as speaking was still impossible. "Good" he said then cupped the younger man's head and brought it back to his neck, kissing his sweaty forehead on the way. There was no rush. Viktor heard his phone beep in response to an incoming text. He didn't care. He just leaned back into the foot of the bed with an exhausted Yuuri in his arms. Finally, the younger man shifted positions and of course his first words were concern for the other.
"Viktor, you must be uncomfortable down here on the floor. I think I can get up now." Together they stood, Yuuri a bit unstable on his feet. His voice nothing but a hoarse whisper.
"Come on Yuuri. Let's go out to the living room. It is late and I think if we both ate something, we would feel better." Blue eyes met brown questionably. There was a quick nod of consent so together, they made their way to the living room. Viktor deposited his exhausted lover on the couch then went to the kitchen to scrounge dinner only to be surprised at the bag on the counter. He read the note first, a bit confused.
Viktor,
Yakov and I picked up some
dinner for you two.
Take care of him.
~Y
He gratefully poured 2 serving of soup into coffee mugs, grabbed spoons and returned to Yuuri. "Here" he said as he approached. "Start with this." He handed him the mug and put his on the coffee table before returning to the kitchen for a plate and knife to slice the fresh baked bread. It was still warm, so he slathered a little butter on a few pieces and brought it all back to the living room to set it on the table next to his soup. Yuuri was taking slow measured bites of the hearty soup. After going back one more time for water and paper towels, he needed to add napkins on the shopping list, Viktor finally sat down to enjoy his own supper.
When they were full, Viktor retrieved his lap top and opened his server. Yuuri looked on with interest but still didn't said anything. There, he found what he was looking for. It was a Japanese sitcom Yuuri favored. They watched it every week in Japan as Viktor learned their language. It seemed so long ago, that precious time in Japan when it was just the two of them, Yuuri's parents, Mari, Minako and the Nishigori family. So different than it was now. "We have missed a few episodes of your show since returning to my country. Want to catch up?"
Yuuri's eyes misted a bit as he simply nodded his head yes. Viktor hit play then checked his phone for that text he heard earlier. It was Yakov, giving both of them Saturday off so they would have off two days in a row. Yuuri settled comfortably into Viktor's arms to watch his show and simply commented "Thank him for me. Do you mind though cuz you know we will make up for it on Monday?"
Viktor laughed "no I don't mind and yes he will make us pay for it Monday. But we will worry about it then. Instead, let's just enjoy this time for us." Yuuri snuggled contently to watch his show. It felt sooooo good to hear a familiar language again. Viktor kept one eye on the show and the other on the man in his arms, making sure he was resting and comfortable.
After a few episodes, Yuuri announced he needed a shower and headed off to the bathroom. While the water was running, Viktor cleaned up dinner then turned off the laptop. He poked his head into the bathroom to inform Yuuri that he was taking Makkachin out and would be right back. It was cold so Makkachin was quick to finish her business. She wanted in. So did Viktor.
Back upstairs, Viktor turned off lights on his way to the bedroom, changed and crawled into bed with Yuuri. He opened his arms and the brunet simply laid his head on Viktor's chest with a contented sigh. They knew they would need to talk tomorrow, but for tonight, this was enough. It took only moments for the younger man to fall asleep. Viktor started at the ceiling, amazed at how fearless and fragile Yuuri could be all wrapped into one. It never ceased to surprise the older man at how protective he felt towards the younger skater. It had been a long day, so Viktor kissed his love's forehead as he too drifted off to sleep.
Sunlight was just started to pour into the bedroom causing Yuuri to wake up. He was still snuggled into Viktor which always made him happy. Then he remembered last night and sobered at the thought. Here he was trying to make things easier for his coach / lover and instead had an anxiety attack. He tried not to berate himself, instead focusing on how grateful he was. If he had to suffer thru one, to do so with Viktor instead of alone was something he didn't take for granted. He always felt safe wrapped up in those strong arms. He sighed in contentment wondering how he could show Viktor his love though he knew the older man was totally aware how much he loved him.
The day was brisk so they layered up and took a happy Makkachin out for a long walk on the beach. On the way home, they stopped in their favorite café for a bite to eat then returned to the apartment where they could finally talk about everything leading up to last night.
By Sunday night when they went to bed early so they could both be to training on time, they had worked out some changes and agreed to communicate honestly and better. Yuuri needed to tell Viktor when he was overwhelmed, but then Viktor needed to return the favor as he was really stretched thin. They could handle this, as long as they approached their problems together. Yuuri's last thought as sleep came to claim him was to thank Yurio for being a good friend. He knew the kid would blow it off, but secretly appreciate it. Viktor had told him how much his anxiety attack had scared the teen ager. They decided to have him over to dinner and video games next week. He always loved that.
Yuuri was pulled from his thoughts by a light kiss on his forehead. "Good night watashi no ai." Viktor whispered sleepily in Japanese.
Yuuri reached up for a proper kiss before replying in Russian "Good night moya lyubov".
At that, Yuuri rolled over and was content to be the little spoon as the world-famous skaters fell asleep snuggled together in a little 3rd floor apartment in St. Petersburg Russia.