A/N: Is it just me or was that finale AWESOME? This scene really gave me a heart attack and I HAD to write Neal's thoughts. This is my first posted White Collar fic, so if you see anything I'm doing wrong or not well enough, please let me know. Also special thanks to my White Collar beta Sparky Dorian! Enjoy!
Warning: Major Spoilers for Free Fall, Out of the Box and Point Blank.
Disclaimer: If you think that my work even compares to amazing Jeff Eastin, then you have problems.
Word Count: 399
Happy Reading!
This is not right. Kate wouldn't want me to do this, ruin my life, to avenge her death.
He grips the gun more carefully, and tries to ignore his common sense, but Neal knows that it's right. The realization of his actions hits him full speed, and he lowers the weapon. But then he hears Garret Fowler—the man who murdered the love of his life—breathe out a sigh of relief. This man is the reason that Kate is no longer breathing. The man who stole her life. He raises the gun again.
Peter bursts through the doors. Neal can hear the desperation in his friend's voice. He does not want Neal to do it.
Neal, put the gun down. Neal don't do this.
Deep down, he knows that the agent is speaking the truth. Suddenly, it is like his mind has been split into two people. One is reminding him that the man before him framed Neal, got Peter suspended, and took Kate away forever. The other is shouting at him to stop. Consider the outcome. Rethink the whole situation. The gun wavers.
Neal, do not do this. Listen to me. If you pull that trigger you will regret it for the rest of your life.
Neal understands the hidden meaning in that statement. If he fires the gun in his hand, he will go to jail, no matter what. Everyone around him will be disappointed, astounded at what he is capable of.
Neal, you're not a killer.
Despite all the "alleged" crimes he has committed, Neal prides himself with the fact that he has never physically hurt anyone. Not once. It is amazing at how one person can change all of that. This makes him want to pull the trigger even more. But Peter's words echo though his head. The two people become one again, saying simply, don't. He has to decide what to do.
This isn't who you are.
Neal puts down his arm. He hands the gun to Peter, and prepares himself for whatever will happen next. But he doesn't regret his decision. If Peter Burke is correct about one thing, it is that Neal Caffrey is not a killer.
A/N #2: