A/N: Here it is! This is the story you guys voted for.
Pairing: Bensidy
Plot: Hospital reunion scene after Olivia saved herself from Lewis.
I hope you enjoy this story. It was fun to write. It took a slightly different turn than I had expected, but I'm still excited about it. As always, read, review, and enjoy. You can contact me on here or at Hesitant_Writer on Twitter. Thanks!
I own no one.
His legs tingled. They almost shook with excitement and anxiety. We found her. She called from an abandoned house on the North Shore. He almost couldn't hear the whole statement. The words, we found her, was everything he ever needed or wanted to hear.
Now all he wanted was to see her.
Despite his fatigue, his adrenaline dragged him into his car, drove him to the hospital, and forced him into the waiting room. That was where he sat, shaking. The bland white walls of the hospital making his skin crawl. His eyes grew wide with every doctor that walked by. He waited and waited for her name to be called. What was taking them so long? She couldn't be that bad, right? She fought off her attacker and was able to call for back up on her own. How bad could she be? He almost feared the answer. He remembered the last time he sat waiting much like he is now.
He sat in the corridor of her precinct, his face in his hands, his hands on his knees. The image of her face stared back at him when he closed his eyes. He couldn't decide if the visual distressed or comforted him.
The previous hours played back in his mind over and over again. The need for him to stay at work, the call he made to let her know he had to cancel plans. The fact that he hadn't seen her in days because of this monster and now he may never see her again, except when he closed his eyes.
He heard the elevator doors open and looked up. Her Captain, with a stoic look on his face, came towards him. Brian immediately stood up. "Hey Captain, any word?" he finished, walking along with his superior.
Cragen kept his pace quick and his look stern. He continued to keep his gaze at the floor. "They're still searching. Last witness we have saw her alive."
Brian's face shot up, his eyes widened, "Was Liv okay?" he asked hopeful yet fearful.
"Compared to the witness, yeah," he answered.
Brian felt frustration course through him. They had the plate numbers of the car he was using. They had everyone out there looking for her. They had a witness. How was it possible they still didn't know where she was?
He felt that same frustration in his veins again today. It was a different kind of frustration, though. They knew where she was now. They knew she was alive. They all had faith she would make it. They knew all of these things and yet, he still wasn't able to see her.
He wasn't sure how he would react upon their first meeting and he had no idea as to how she'd react. Did she even want to see him? Was she going to push him away? His nerves started to kick in and hands began to shake, matching his legs.
After what felt like an eternity, a slender, young looking male doctor came into the waiting room. "Family of Olivia Benson," he called, his tone never changing. He stood, his legs almost failing him. Somehow, as if the lower half of his body had a mind of it's own, he walked up to the young man and stuck his hand out.
"Brian Cassidy," he said dryly, taking the doctor's hand, "I'm Olivia's boyfriend. How is she?" He hated how his voice seemed to fail him. The last thing he wanted was to appear weak. He needed to be strong for her. He needed to be her superman. She'd been his superwoman for so long, it was time he returned the gesture. She'd been strong for him when he was shot. She was even stronger during his trial. She was practically unbreakable.
Except now, he feared she really was broken.
"Sir?" the doctor called, breaking him from his thoughts.
Brian blinked for a second. His focus was gone; he hadn't heard a single word the doctor said. "Huh? Sorry, I lost you for a second," he spoke embarrassed.
The doctor simply smiled at him, "She's in room 203. We have her on a lot of pain medication for her injuries so she may be sleeping, but she is expected to make a full recovery. We'll release her midday tomorrow."
Brian nodded and proceeded down what seemed like a never-ending hall. Her room was, of course, the second to last one on the left side. He approached her door. Just as he was about to enter he realized he should've gotten her flowers, a teddy bear, a card, something. He stood there awkwardly. He cursed himself for not trying harder: to get in contact with her, to look for her, and now to comfort her. His heart swelled with pain and guilt as his hand pushed her door open quietly.
He entered the room; it was silent except for the beeping of monitors and the faint sound of her breathing. He turned around to close the door behind him. He rested his forehead against the wood. He breathed deeply as he continued to listen to the shrill beeping. Tears pooled in his eyes as he remembered the quick glance he got at her resting form. Her face bruised, her arm in a cast, her forehead bandaged, her sparkle gone. He sighed deeply as he heard a faint sound.
"I'm okay," she whispered, seeing the guilt overtake his body.
Of course she was, wasn't she always?
Brian turned around and looked at her. She lifted her good arm, signaling for him to come to her. Hesitantly, he did as she silently directed. He walked over to the side of her bed, gingerly sat down on the edge, and carefully pulled her to him.
She rested her head in the crook of his neck and sighed. Feeling her relax, he wrapped both arms around her and held her securely to him. His nose in her hair, he breathed her in. The familiar scent reassured him that she was really here, she was safe, and she wasn't going anywhere. He placed a few gentle kisses to the side of her head and softly rubbed her back.
They held their embrace for a substantial length of time, neither wanting to let go. After four days of wondering and worrying about where she was and what was happening, he had no intention of ever letting her go anytime soon. He'd stay just like this forever if it meant she was safe.
Eventually, her body growing sore and tired, she needed to unwrap herself from him. He reluctantly opened his arms, allowing her to lie back down. He then moved to sit in the chair next to her bed. She reached for his hand, not wanting to completely break contact. He took it gratefully; happy she wasn't shying away from him or his touch, in fact she yearned for it.
His thumb rubbed small circles over her knuckles as he watched her close her eyes. He knew she was tired, but he also knew she didn't want to sleep. He could see the fear in her face. She knew nightmares would come; she just wasn't prepared for them. How can she be prepared for them?
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed each of her fingers. She slowly opened her eyes and stared at him. After kissing her pinky knuckle, she moved her hand to caress his face. He kissed her palm. "That actually feels kind of nice," she chuckled. She was so sore all over any movement usually caused her discomfort, but Brian's gentle touch soothed her.
"Something about a woman in a hospital bed," he winked, holding her hand against his face. She smiled sleepily at him. Watching her eyes close again, he rested their intertwined hands in his lap. He began to rub small circles with his thumb again.
He watched her as she began to drift off. Her eyes fluttered as her head fell to one side. She was beautiful. Even with her injuries and somewhat gloomy expression, she never failed to take his breath away. He held her hand in his left and used his right to gently rub and massage her forearm. He just wanted to touch her. He wanted to make sure she was really in front of him and that she wasn't going anywhere.
She didn't expect him to change his movements and her eyes shot open. She gasped quietly, embarrassed and somewhat frustrated at her reaction. He stopped moving.
"Liv," he said quietly. She looked over at him, tears threatening to fall. She was upset about her reaction, exhausted, and doped up on pain medication. Her mind was full of too many things to think and focus on. He knew this; he just wanted her to sleep.
"It's okay," he said soothingly. "It's just me. Relax and try to sleep."
"I don't want to sleep," she said tiredly, "I haven't seen you in four days."
He chuckled. Olivia had always been so concerned about how much time they spent together. Mostly because with her crazy hours she could rarely spend the whole night with him, sometimes they wouldn't even make it through dinner. She always felt guilty, but he always understood. He had been there, too. He couldn't say he missed it. But he would admit he did miss her when she would get wrapped up in cases. Her famous line was always, "Baby, I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise." He will say, she did always come through on her promises.
"Well, start thinking of ways to make it up to me," he smiled.
"Who said I didn't already have some ideas?" she said playfully. He laughed at the combination of sass and exhaustion in her voice and kissed her hand.
She had surprised him with how much emphasis she put on their relationship. She wasn't kidding when she said she had changed. She made sure to call him when he would start his shift, whether or not she was at work was irrelevant. If she was home when she called, she typically stayed on the line with him for a while, usually until he had to hang up. Those were the nights he loved, aside from the ones he actually got to spend with her. He could tell how important those nights were to her, as well. It gave her the opportunity to deflate, let off some steam from the day. Sometimes she'd fall asleep on the line. He typically waited a few minutes to see if she'd wake up again and properly say goodnight, but most of the time she didn't. He always laughed, hung up, and shot her a quick goodnight text. Her reply and apology usually coming within the hour.
He loved her, and there was no way he could ever deny it.
He wondered if she loved him, too. He thinks she does. She stuck it out with him this long and through her display when he walked in the room he obviously meant something to her. Yet they had never said those three words to each other. Sometimes he would say things like, "I love that about you," or "I adore when you do that," but never, "I love you."
It almost seemed like one of those things they each knew and just didn't feel the need to say. She knew he loved her, and if she had any doubt about it before, she definitely didn't now.
He meant every word he said to Munch the first night she had been taken. He really couldn't imagine his life without her. He didn't want to think about anyone else calling him at the start of his shift, or leaving work to go to anyone else's apartment besides hers.
He saw her eyes start to close and he figured it would be best to let her sleep. He continued to hold her hand as he thought about when would be the right time to tell her how he felt.
"I can hear you thinking," she said quietly.
"Just sleep," he demanded gently. She needed to rest. The doctors could decide to make her stay an extra day if she was still too weak. He wanted nothing more than for her to come home with him. She would be safe there; he would make sure of it. He would also make sure she felt it, too.
"Talk to me," she whispered.
"Later," he insisted.
"No," she said, "I won't be able to fall asleep unless you talk to me." She sounded defeated, almost embarrassed by her confession. Of course, there was nothing for her to be embarrassed about, but that was Olivia. She was a lioness, and admitting weakness would bring her down to a cub, or so she thought.
"What do you want me to talk about?" he asked still caressing her knuckles with his thumb.
"Anything you want," she said. "Tell me a story."
Brian smiled; he had the perfect story in mind. "Okay," he said. He cleared his throat, earning a small laugh from his girlfriend, and began, "There once was this beautiful lion. She had a heart of gold and was the protector of many." Olivia chuckled a little. Brian could be such a child sometimes. But as expected, her eyes began to close again and her body relaxed.
He continued, "Her and her pack actually protected the entire jungle. They were good lions who were loved by many. One day, the lioness was walking around the jungle and stumbled upon a lamb. She had no idea where the lamb had come from or how he got there, but there was something about him that calmed her. She feared he wouldn't last long out in the middle of the jungle and so she brought the lamb back to the lion's den. They, of course, all wanted to eat him, not trusting where he came from. But the lioness-" he paused looking at her, a small smile graced her sleeping form. He contemplated finishing the story or not, but decide to continue.
"The lioness, made the rest of the pack promise they would protect the lamb like how they protect the whole jungle. Reluctantly, they agreed." He watched her sleep a little longer, thinking of how he wanted to finish this silly story he had "written" on the fly.
He then thought of the perfect ending.
"One day," he started, "One of the lions from her pack ran into a gorilla. This gorilla had something bad about him. You could tell he was up to no good. When the lion brought him to the den to show the lioness, the gorilla tried to conquer the den so he could take over the jungle. Well-" he paused. He ran his thumb over her fingers a little faster.
"The lioness," he paused again, "wouldn't let that happen. She fought hard to protect her pack and her jungle." His throat became thick with emotion as he finished his story. "The lioness and the gorilla fought a hard battle, but eventually the lioness won. The gorilla was kicked out of the jungle and everyone was safe once again. The lioness, of course, having fought so hard, got a little injured."
She moved ever so slightly and he knew she was awake.
"So, the lamb came to her rescue. Her nursed her wounds and helped her heal so she could continue to protect the jungle. He took care of her, much like how she had taken care of him." Tears shown in his eyes as he said the last lines of the story. "She got better, as they both did. They got stronger, and in the process, the lion fell in love with the lamb." He finished the last line kind of quickly, not wanting her to hear the emotion in his voice. He stayed quiet, hoping she had fallen back to sleep.
After a few moments, she realized the story was over. She stirred, "That's it?" she asked, "Do the lion and the lamb get married? Do they live happily ever after?"
Brian rolled his eyes at her stubbornness. "I don't know," he laughed, "I'll write the sequel when I get home."
She chuckled, her eyes still closed. "I guess I did like that ending," she said, "I did fall in love with my lamb." She began to move her fingers against his palm.
He sat up a little higher in his chair and leaned closer to her. "Really?" he said, his heart's pace quickening, "Because, I fell in love with my lioness. And she'll always be a lioness to me."
A small tear slipped down her cheek, "Brian, what are we doing right now?"
"Look at me," he said gently, wiping the tear from her face. She opened her eyes and looked into his. He smiled. "Olivia," he started, "I love you. So much. These last four days absolutely terrified me. You mean so much to me and I really thought I was never going to be able to tell you." His eyes started to water, "I love you, all of you," he said.
Tears streamed down her face as he reached over to the wipe them away. "I love you, too, Brian," she said with a happy cry, "I really do," she said. She felt bad for not saying as much as he had, but she was exhausted and he was well aware of it.
"It's okay," he whispered softly, brushing his thumb along her cheek, "go to sleep."
She grabbed his hand and pulled gently, "Come," she whispered, "I know you're tired, too."
"The chair is fine for me," he said.
"Well, it's not for me," she said. She needed him close. She needed to feel his warmth. She had missed him and his touch.
He leaned over and placed a soft kiss on her forehead and then lightly dropped one to her lips. "Don't worry," she whispered.
He looked at her confused, "Worry about what, Baby?"
"I think you're a much cooler animal than a lamb," she smiled sleepily. He laughed and kissed her forehead again.
She carefully moved over and onto her less injured side. Brian quietly discarded his shoes and jacket and climbed in behind her, gently pulling her into his arms. He brushed some of the hair out of her face and felt her sigh into him. He kissed the back of her head and closed his eyes.
Sleep came easy for both the lion and the lamb.
There it is! I hope you enjoyed reading. I also hope you liked where the story went. It was MUCH different than what I expected, but I'm happy with it.
I may do another story like this. I liked you guys picking the pairing and the plot. It's a challenge for me. PLEASE review either on here or on Twitter at Hesitant_Writer.
Thank you!