A/N: Okay, another story I am working on that has been stuck in my head all day. Hope you guys enjoy, R&R, and stay tuned for more!

Disclaimer: iCarly is not mine. I think we can all agree to that.

Chapter 1: Prologue

My name is Fredward Benson. Don't ask me where that name came from, because I am just as lost as you out there. I guess it's safe to say that my mom wanted to name me Fred and Edward at the same time and decided to transmute them to make a name that is just as original as she says I am. I don't see the originality in me though. I am in a sense a nerd. I love computers, calculators are like my best friends, and I never get tired of watching Galaxy Wars: The Ghostly Avenger. But the one thing I also am is a realist. I know that the Galaxy Wars saga movies aren't real. I know that Korba is just a funny robot that has no way of understanding the proper usage of the English language, and that space ships are something that I will probably not see in my life. At least I can admit to these problems easily, not like those that strap fairy wings to their backs and automatically call themselves fantasy creatures. I don't believe in fairy tales, like my friend Carly does. For one, all that girly crap just gives me a sense of frustration. The princess falling ill and the prince fighting off dragons to rescue her just makes me want to punch a nub. I never understood how guys could get into stuff like that. I can understand the adventurous aspect to it, but it didn't even have that going for it, because the girl was always within reach. And that kissing crap, don't get me started on that.

I would hear these stories of true love since I was a little kid. When I was born, I remember my mom would read me that princess crap because she thought she was going to have a girl. When I came out with boy parts, she was very disappointed but tried. I would hear them all. I would hear the stories of the woodland creatures, the myths of the gods and goddesses, little red riding hood and the wolf that swallowed her up (actually I think that story is the only one that I can stomach, because someone dies). She even went as far as to try to convince me that there were such things as mermaids. Mermaids! Thank God for my allowance so I could go buy comic books worth reading, or at least look at the pictures. I swear If I turned gay I think she would have been proud of me.

It was these types of stories that would bring my newfound friend (and love interest) Carly and her older brother Spencer over. She liked listening to the stories that my mom would want to read to me, but I learned early how to close her out. But that didn't work on Carly. Of course she ate that up. She was a girl, and determined in proving fairy tale creatures as real, and Bigfoot was her main target to prove such a thing. Her brother was no help to that whole thing either, because he believed in something called the Beavcoon. Needless to say, I was surrounded by a bunch of nut jobs. And the only escape I had was my Galaxy Wars comics. And then the movie came out. So my salvation was both in my hands and on the screen by my seventh birthday.

I remember the first time my mom implanted that whole idea of mermaids into Carly's head. It was when I was turning ten, and my mom decided to throw me a party. She invited all of my friends from school, both boys and girls. When the time of the party came around only a handful of the few of my friends infiltrated my home and after the sugarless cookies and cake that was not cake (it didn't look like cake, smell like it, and certainly didn't taste like it), she sat us all down to begin what I like to label as "my most mortifying moment." Pretty alliteration huh?

"Okay everyone settle down." She told my friends, who wished were sugar crazy. Instead they looked a little bit brain dead due to the lack of sugar. Plus Geoffrey looked like he wanted to punch me because of that little setback. "We are going to listen to a story that Freddie has loved since he was just a baby boy! It's one of his favorites and one of my own as well!" she said overenthusiastically as she went into the room where we kept all the books she would read to me as I was growing up. As we plopped down one by one I took my spot next to Carly, who even then I was crushing on like crazy, but she didn't seem to notice how much I really liked her. Nonetheless I liked the way she wouldn't brush me off for being too close to her. When my mom came back inside the living room, my mouth dropped to the floor as she showed them that the story she was going to share was the one about the Little Mermaid that wanted to be a human. You can pretty much guess how it is: wants to be human, falls in love, kiss of true love, mushy mushy, kiss, kiss, freaking kiss!

It was just as worse if not more than when she would show people my naked baby pictures. She explained how I would always ask stupid questions like if they were really real, and if what happened in the story actually has happened in real life. I never did anything like that. I always was entertaining myself with comics while I was being held on her knee, bouncing in the process (she did that until I was around six). It was either that or I was just playing with blocks and just not pay attention to her. I didn't want to know anything about these pointless and false stories that she was trying to put into my head.

All the boys in the party stifled their snorts of laughter, and my mom kept on with her story telling. Between this and the baby pictures, I would honestly have rather had my mom show them naked baby pictures than have them think that my mom read to me cute stories of the forest creatures that could talk to people to help them out. I never heard the end of it. I still get called 'Baby Benson' from time to time in the locker room. Geoffrey started it, and still kept the teasing going, all the way until Carly and me entered school together. I was surprised they never went as far as to call me a fag. It wasn't until after that incident that I told her I wasn't going to listen to her tell me these stories anymore. I didn't want to hear them anymore, and I didn't want to know about them anymore. I wanted to play with my figurines, read my comic books. I wanted to grow up mostly, and these crappy stories of make believe were not being much help in that department.

It may have hurt her feelings to know that I didn't want to listen to it anymore but I was being serious. The last thing I needed was to have this keep going when I would go into high school. So she did, miraculously enough, and put the books away and never mentioned those stories to me ever again. It's hard to say that I missed them when they caused me nothing but trouble all through elementary school. But it needed to be done, so I could live a normal, average life.

That was, until I met a chick by the name of Samantha Puckett.

A/N: Off the bat... does it sound interesting? Lemme know in a Review!