Author's note: I've always disliked the way "Four percent solution" ended (yeah, I have a thing with endings), so this is my fix for it, cuts in right after the doctor leaves Mac's room.
This answers the HBX challenge of September 2009.
Title dedicated to Katrin – following our discussion, I just had to!
Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Not mine, just having some fun, will put them right back, promise.
Berry kiss
He ached to touch her, to caress her face, her hair, to make the anguish in her features melt away to nothingness. But he was too afraid. Afraid to physically hurt her with his touch, afraid she'd shy away and make the vice on his heart tighten even more.
When finally the urge was too strong, he settled for taking her hand in his and squeezing it tightly. The vice's grip eased when she squeezed back and tried to smile at him at the gesture. He took in a deep breath.
"Mac..." Words couldn't possibly explain what he felt at that moment. Wouldn't be able to describe just how his heart had sped when he first received word of her accident, wouldn't do justice to the pounding of blood in his ears, the shutting out of everything and anything except getting to her side as quickly as possible and making sure she was alright. He was still trying to convince himself that she was fine, right there lying on the bed, his emotions just not catching up with what his eyes were telling him.
"You're okay..." He managed, half talking to himself. He heard her sigh softly and raised his gaze from her hand to her face, scrutinizing the bruises.
"I'm glad you're here." She whispered through cracked lips.
"I'll stay the night." He half offered, half stated. He was fully expecting her to fight him on this, but he was ready for it and not about to back down.
She moved around, trying to look at him better, wincing at the new pains simple movements elicited. "Have you been to the wall yet?"
"I'll go another day. I'm sure my dad will understand." He hoped his tone was sufficiently commanding, as he prepared to throw back arguments.
"Thank you."
"It's not-" He was already reacting, when he registered her response and fell silent. "You didn't fight me." He scanned her face in search of an explanation. She looked tired and subdued, and the urge to take her in his arms sent currents through his extremities.
"I'm done fighting, Harm." She took a short breath, ready to take a step forward. "I've been pushing you away..."
He couldn't help his automatic "Yeah, you have.", though he half regretted it at her pained expression.
"I'm sorry." Her fingers were caressing his palm. "No more."
A few minutes were passed with their gazes locked and the room in complete silence. Mac was tired, but happy. Though the way Harm looked at her made her stomach flutter, they were back on familiar ground, they would find their way back to each other, she could be optimistic.
Harm, on his part, was busy arguing with himself, staring at her lips. Finally, a decision was reached. Very slowly, he leaned down towards her, gently moving a strand of hair away from her face. As softly as he could, he pressed his lips to hers, keeping a steel grasp over the need to hold her tightly against him and kiss her thoroughly. For a fleeting moment he was sure he tasted berries. Backing away slowly he looked down to see Mac's eyes closed, a small smile playing on her lips.
When her eyes fluttered open and settled once again on him, he couldn't help the grin that spread his lips. He had just put that look of bliss on her airbag-bruised-but-still-beautiful face. To his dismay, the look of bliss soon gave way to confusion.
"Does this-" Mac cleared her throat. "Does this mean-"
Harm gallantly decided to put her out of her misery. "It means I'm still here, and if you're done pushing me away, I'd like to be closer."
Such simple words, strung together to make such a wonderful, promising sentence. Mac thought she might cry with joy, but then decided it would probably be too painful and settled for a smile. She reached with her other hand in his direction. "Please, come closer."
Hesitating only for a moment, Harm gingerly moved to sit on the edge of her bed, as Mac moved to the side. When he settled, he moved his arm and she happily settled against him, resting her un-bruised temple on his shoulder, her hand flat against his chest. A deep sense of contentment washed over him, finally holding her in his arms; he hadn't known how tense he'd been till he now finally relaxed. Resting his head against hers, he breathed in deeply and dropped a kiss on her crown. "I love you, Mac."
The words just slipped away unnoticed by him, but not by Mac, who was suddenly in great pain, due to the sharp movement said words evoked in an effort to see his face. "Ow! Damn it..."
More careful now, Mac moved away from Harm, her eyes searching his. He was looking at her in amusement, outwardly completely at ease and not one bit startled by this seemingly unexpected reveal. *Her* expression, on the other hand, reflected awe and confusion.
"Well, don't look so surprised," Harm said in mock hurt, "it's not like I've been hiding my feelings these past months." He allowed Mac to process and accept what he was saying. "Mattie made sure of that." He added as an appreciative afterthought. At Mac's furrowed brow he felt compelled to explain. "Our perfected 'there is no us' line didn't work on her, and when she asked me pointblank if I loved you, I couldn't escape the truth anymore."
"When was this?" Mac finally found her voice and concentrated on the small details in their conversation, as she digested the greater meaning behind it.
"Hmmm... last spring?"
A lengthy sigh escaped her. She'd wasted a lot of time. But spilt milk and all, and the fact that it now hurt to cry, she'd just have to make the best of time from now on. "I love you too, Harm, I hope you know that." Mac kissed him briefly, willing herself to wait 3 to 5 days until the bruises were gone and she could kiss him properly and for a far longer while. She moved to rest against him once again, watching her fingers trace the buttons on his uniform top.
Definitely berries, was the only thought going through Harm's mind. "Berries?"
Mac chuckled softly against him. "Yeah... my lips are cracked and dry and the only thing I had in my purse was this berry flavored balm Chloe had sent me." She felt the laughter rumble through his chest.
Harm settled back, arms wrapped around his love, mind full of thoughts and plans. A smile comprised of content, amusement, anticipation and a touch of cockiness adorned his face. His first plan entailed taking Mac home the following morning, nursing her back to full health, then taking the time to fully enjoy and appreciate her berry kiss.
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The End.
