SUMMARY: Following a tragic accident that ended with the loss of her life, Kaiya Tsuki is reincarnated by the manifestation of her combined twin blade zanpakuto. Once an arrancar, Kaiya finds herself in a new life where she was saved by shinigami and became one herself. Kaiya must adjust to life as a shinigami, knowing of her loss, and seeing the love of her life who hardly knows her, all the while keeping her true identity and past a secret.
"We have t-!"
"There's no time! We have to do this right now!"
I could barely hear the panicked argument over my cries of agony. The flower I had plucked only minutes before was crushed in my grip as I writhed in pain. The stem nothing more than green juice in my palm. The petals were beginning to curl in their death. I would have been upset if I hadn't been in unbearable pain in that instance. After all, it was one of my favorite things about the world of the living.
"We can't, she needs help, we have to take her back! We can do it!"
"I'm telling you, there's no time, she's hemorrhaging, we need to do this now before it's too late!"
Before I could scold them on their bickering, another powerful wave of the worst agony I'd ever experienced rolled through every inch of my body. It felt as though I was being ripped apart from the inside. My scream filled the meadow. Tears spilled down my cheeks at the sharp increase of pain. My love, awash with concern, pulled my tense body to his chest.
"Kaiya!" He cried in alarm. His voice was distant in my ears as blood rushed through them. "Look at her, she's dying, we have to do this right here!"
"A-alright, fine, fine! Quickly!"
Everything after that was a blur of motion and pain. My dizziness eventually caused most of my memories to be blurs of colors. Strikes of silver when my love switched from comforting me and helping with my baby. Splashes of red that always followed pain. These blurred events seemed endless until one sound made all the hectic motion cease.
My baby was crying.
Tears that were already flowing down my cheeks began to sparkle in joy. The bottom portion of my body was completely numb, but it didn't matter. It was the most blessed music I had ever heard. The cries of what could only be my perfect child. I could hear the sobs of my love as I made out a blurred form of him cradling it.
"Kaiya, look, look at our beautiful son," Came his shaking, love filled voice. My face was alight with a beam as I reached my arms toward the two beings that existed as my entire world. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the spirits of my zanpakuto; they looked horrified. I couldn't figure out why they wore such expressions, I was the happiest I could have ever been. They were talking rapidly to each other, but I couldn't hear their voices. My baby was placed into my arms.
As I gazed at my son, my eyes glazed with more tears that shed. He was nothing short of a miracle. I couldn't control my joyful sobbing as his crying slowly began to cease. Peace overtook his tiny features. Finally, he relaxed and slowly fell asleep in my arms. Gently, I placed a loving kiss against his forehead. Soft red hair brushed against my cheeks as I did so.
"He's beautiful," I sighed blissfully. I could feel the grip of sleep pulling me away too. There was a firm grip on my shoulders, but I was far too exhausted to react. "Akai…" my near silent whisper.
"Kaiya!" The frantic cries of my name grew more and more distant as I faded away into my slumber. The pain faded away too.
"Huh?!" I gasped awake, bolting upright. Red hair fell over my face with the sudden motion. Falling over my shoulders were two long white braids. Without a moment's thought, my hands clutched to my stomach. To my horror, it was flat. As I frantically grabbed at myself, I heard an unfamiliar voice.
"'Bout time you woke up, Kaiya," the male voice grumbled. In shock, I slowly turned my attention to the direction I had heard it. In front of me stood a red haired shinigami man who had his hand outstretched toward me. My instincts kicked in the moment I realized it was a soul reaper and not the two people who had been with me only moments before—or so I thought. I quickly slapped his hand away from me and jumped to my feet. I reached toward my hips, but my swords weren't there. I could only gasp. They were on the ground several feet from me.
"What's gotten into you?" He asked in astonishment, shaking his now red hand. "I know I knocked you out, but shit, ya' hothead. Don't be mad at me because you failed to block," he groaned. My hands were shaking. I couldn't figure out why he talked to me as though we'd known each other for years. While he was whining at me, I managed to take in my surroundings.
Reishi composed buildings. Large, organized barracks. Sokyoku hill; the one I had heard so much of from countless nights of stories with the father of my baby. The one they had made their escape during their treachery. Even the building that housed the central 46. There was no doubt about it.
I was in the Seireitei.
"What is going on?!" I called out, throwing him off guard. My fists were clenched defensively; I held them up to guard myself. "Who are you?! Why am I here?!" I continued, backing away from him in my defensive position.
"What?" He asked in shock. "What are you talking about? It's me, Renji! Your brother you idiot. We were sparring! You had to have hit your head harder than I thought… Maybe I should take you to the fourth company barracks to have you checked out," he pondered. I growled.
"I said why am I here, Shini-!" My enraged roar was interrupted by a voice in my head.
Kaiya stop.
Slowly, I unclenched one of my fists and pressed it against my head as I groaned.
Relax.
Both of my hands were on my head. A sudden, splitting headache had taken over. The pain was horrific, sending me slowly sinking onto my knees. I squeezed my eyes shut.
"Kaiya?" The soul reaper's voice was filled with concern then. "Alright, I don't know what happened, but you're acting insane! Come on I'll take you to fourth company to get checked out," he said urgently. I could barely hear him. The headache brought the rushing of blood through my ears. My energy was fading quickly. One hand fell from my head and into the ground as a support as I fell forward. My other hand moved to rest over one of my eyes. Then, I was lifted by the red-haired soul reaper man.
It must have been flash step. I didn't even have a single second to protest him grabbing me. In mere moments we were just outside the squad four barracks. The gate had the squad four insignia above the doors. He pushed open the doors and called inside. Then, he took a few steps in, looking for someone to help.
"Is Captain Unohana available?" He asked. I was horrified to meet a captain, but my vague memories told me a healer could do some good. Not that I could fight against anything. The pain in my head was blinding. By that point I wasn't even able to find my voice. Suddenly there was a rather tall woman in front of the two of us.
"Oh, Lieutenant Kotetsu," the red head breathed in relief. "I hope you aren't busy, but I have a bit of an emergency. She's gone crazy, acting like she doesn't know who I am and then she dropped onto the ground holding her head," he explained, holding me out to her. She nodded respectfully.
"I'll have available members see to her Lieutenant Abarai, and I'll let you know what we find. If it's serious I ensure captain with see to her personally. She does look quite ill. How long has she been like this?" She inquired, taking me from his arms. I watched as he rubbed the back of his neck.
"Uh, well, she's actually been acting strangely all day," he started, "she insisted she was fine and that we spar, even though I didn't think it was a good idea. Her reflexes were off too, and I may have hit her a bit too hard. She was out for a couple of hours, and when she came to, she freaked. I don't think she even knows where she is, honestly. Then she dropped back to the ground and her head is bleeding quite a bit," The woman who held me looked beyond concerned. Renji wasn't wrong, of course; I knew less than the bare minimum about the soul society, and one thing was certain. I should not have been there.
"That is very strange, okay I'll take care of her right away!" She assured before quickly running with me inside the barracks. I watched with blurred vision as the doors closed. I must have fallen unconscious just after that, because the next thing I knew I was waking up in a small bed.
The splitting pain in my head was gone, I could see clearly. Sitting up, I noticed I was in thin, white robes. I rubbed my face with my hands as I groaned. As I was about to comment on what a strange dream it was, I realized I was still in it. For some reason I still couldn't fathom what was going on. The reishi composition screamed soul reaper, even my own. There was no way it could actually be some kind of dream, could it?
"What is going on? Why am I in the soul society?" I breathed to myself. Standing, I made my way to the small window in the room. Looking outside, I had quite a view of the squad four barracks. I was gazing at the outside for several minutes before I heard the voice again.
Kaiya.
I snapped my attention to the voice. The moment I felt the presence behind me, I flipped around to face it.
"... Seikatsu…?" I slowly breathed in astonishment.
Before me stood the being of my twin blades as one. Her arms were open to me, a gesture of friendliness and protection. Hair billowed from her head and haloed her. It seemed to move as though there were a gentle breeze in the room. She was beyond beautiful. Her eyes, however, looked hollow and sad.
Something grave has happened, I'm afraid.
Her voice was angelic as it reached my ears. But I could not allow myself to be lost in her grace. The angelic nature was shadowed by a sense of urgency and fear.
Do you remember what happened?
That was quite the question. I felt as though the answer was obvious. I was with in the world of the living with a close friend, and my lover. We were taking a walk. Then, suddenly, I was in excruciating pain. And my baby was crying. Tears were suddenly flowing again.
"Where's my baby?!" I cried, clutching at my stomach. In the next instant, her arms were wrapped around me as she cradled me to her chest. Her touch was gentle and soothing.
Kaiya, I need you to listen carefully.
I could only nod. Seikatsu was stroking my hair as I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself.
On that day…
I heard and felt her sigh heavily. Then, she held me closer; like a mother comforting her child.
That day, you died.
My eyes snapped open as I clutched the sleeves of her elegant kimono. Quickly, she shushed me with the incredibly sorrowful look in her eyes. I could see her own tears forming.
It was horrifying. Everything happened so suddenly, it was just a horrible accident. Chi tried to help, but the injury was just too much too fast. The fact that you were pregnant negated your regeneration as well…
There was only one thing left to do at that point. You were already too far gone. So, in their panic, Chi and Tamashi came together. Then I was able to take things into my own hands. It was too late to save you, but there was one other thing I could and did do.
"Seikatsu…?" Was all I managed as I looked at the pain in her face. She sighed once more and continued running her fingers through my hair.
I brought you to another life.
"What does that mean?" I asked slowly. "Why am I here in Soul Society? If it's another life, shouldn't I be a child?" There were so many other questions I wanted to ask.
It's much more complicated than that. There were mere moments to react. No time to start your life anew; I had to borrow another. You are a shinigami, Kaiya. This is your life.
Her explanation struck. I wasn't with the enemy. I was the enemy. Seikatsu had taken my soul and traded it with the soul of the Kaiya that had become a Shinigami rather than a hollow. Another fate; another life. I covered my head in my hands once more.
"I—there's no memories of this life," I breathed, closing my eyes to concentrate. I no longer felt like the hollow I once was; but all of the memories were clear. Seikatsu leaned further against me.
I didn't want to transfer memories without your permission. It will likely destroy memories of your previous life. If you wish, I can merge them, so you will harbor some of both.
"It won't be painful, will it?" I asked softly, head still in my hands. The gentle shake of her head was reassuring.
I cannot decide what memories stay or go, though. It may be disorienting.
"I can't live in this life without knowing who I am, or anything about myself and the Shinigami around me," I sighed. "We'll just have to accept the risk," Seikatsu nodded her understanding. Then, she stood, lifting me to my feet. Gently, she placed her fingers against my forehead.
Close your eyes, keep your mind clear. This should only take a few moments.
Following her instructions, I slowly closed my eyes. At the same time, I cleared my mind of thoughts. With a soft exhale, I relaxed. Her fingers were warm against my skin. She held a firm arm around my shoulders. It felt as though I was being lulled to sleep. Then, suddenly, it was an explosion of light to my closed eyes.
At first, I was surrounded by white. I could no longer feel Seikatsu's arms around me. It was a floating sensation. Then, images from my own point of view began to flood around me, erasing the white one by one. The sheer amount was overwhelming.
Slowly, I managed to file through them. As I calmed my mind further, they began to organize themselves chronologically. I began to notice patterns in the places I saw, as well as the people around me. The soul reaper that had taken me to be healed had a large part in the memories that lay before me. In the order of my memories, I could see his progress in tandem with my own throughout our lives. The lives we clearly shared.
He really is my brother.
There was so much to take in. The beginning started with my young life in the Rukongai. I spent it with many other people my age, including Renji. He made a friend too, a dark-haired girl named Rukia. Following that was our shared want to join the court guard companies as soul reapers. We entered the soul reaper academy. We'd graduated.
I'd already been a soul reaper for many years. One of the only three to have control over two zanpakuto. Unfortunately, I had yet to hold a seated position. As I continued to go through them, the images of my own memories transmitted themselves to me. Shortly after, it felt as though I really had lived that life, and not just another version of me. The white surrounding me began to fade until I could feel Seikatsu's arms once more.
Blinking several times, I tried to regain my bearings. My vision adjusted to the far less bright atmosphere. Seikatsu loosened her hold on me. Thankfully, I had no dizzy or ill sensations. Everything melded together as best it could.
Now that you have memories of this life, what do you remember of your previous one?
"It's scattered, but I remember a lot of what had happened close to my death, and some things here and there about living in Las Noches and the things I learned from him," I spoke quietly. She nodded.
Take time to collect them, you have less than half left. Keep those that are dear and let the rest be overwritten by this life.
I nodded at her instruction. She had a point; there was no way I could go back. I would have to live with the memories I treasure and that would be the end of it. When I looked at her, she had a mix of a stern and fearful expression. I couldn't help but feel worry renew itself.
Listen carefully. You must not tell a single soul what has happened to you. I don't think they would believe you. Whatever knowledge you have that concerns the future of anybody, or the soul society in general, you must keep to yourself.
She sounded so serious I knew I had to obey with everything I had. I found myself nodding again.
Promise me.
"I promise, Seikatsu, I won't tell anyone," I told her firmly. I meant every word.
Another thing, I want you to be careful. I am only able to do this once, and the three of us don't want to lose you. Please, if you must be defeated by death, make sure it's meaningful at the very least, because I won't be able to bring you back a second time.
This time her eyes were filled with tears. I understood her pain. Again, I was nodding. Then, she embraced me tightly. I returned the action.
Then, I'll be going now. Call on me whenever you need me, but remember, I am defensive only.
"Thank you," I whispered softly as she faded from my arms. In her place, my faithful twin blades appeared. Gently, I stroked my hand over the both of them. "Hi, girls," I murmured with a smile.
The door at my left opened up.
"Oh good, you're awake," came the relieved voice. Unlike before, I could recognize it this time. I turned my attention to her.
"Lieutenant Kotetsu," I greeted with a polite nod. She waved her hand.
"I told you you could call me Isane, we are friends! Are you feeling better? A few people mentioned you were acting strange," she explained. I couldn't recall who all were my friends, it was definitely something to work on.
"Uh, yeah, actually! I feel much better now, thanks for your help," I told her gratefully. She nodded, pleased.
"I'm glad. Well, you're free to go then! I suggest taking the rest of the day to rest, just to be sure," she suggested. I nodded as I stood.
"Thank you Lieu—Isane," I spoke with sincerity. Thankfully, I'd been in the squad four barracks before and could remember the way out, as well as the way to where I stayed. Not that I made it there without interruption. Immediately after stepping out of the squad four barracks, Renji was there, waiting for me.
"Oi, Kaiya, are you alright?" He asked as he turned toward me. Rubbing the back of my head, I shuffled through my jumbled memories as quickly as I could.
"I guess so, I don't feel bad or anything," I started. Then, I grasped a hold of what I had been doing before I was transferred to this body. "You didn't have to hit me that fucking hard," I jeered, punching his shoulder.
"Ow! Well maybe you should've blocked like you were supposed to, dumbass!" He grumbled. Giving him a sneer, I yanked on a piece of his ponytail.
"That's not how you talk to your big sister," I warned playfully. Then, I stretched. "I'm gonna go rest for awhile longer," Renji cocked his head to the side.
"What, did Isane tell you that?"
I paused. Of course, I'm still the same. He knows me just like I do. No matter what life I'm in, I am still the same Kaiya. One of the things I rarely do or have done is rest if I don't feel like I need to. I certainly didn't need to rest. But there were things I needed to think about.
"Yeah, I know, I never do that. But, I don't know, I think I should play it safe today. Both of you said I've been acting weird, so I'm gonna rest," I explained. He watched me closely for awhile before nodding.
"Alright then, go ahead. There's not much going on today anyway," he shrugged. I nodded. Before I could do anything stupid, I went through my memories to see how we displayed our affection for each other. With a smile, I held my hand up, and he clasped it tightly like we had always done.
"Catcha' later," I told him, waving as I walked off.