Chapter 1: What Happened the Day Moony became Loony
Remus forced down a mad chuckle as he stole down the corridor. Oh this was going to be so much fun! Why hadn't Sirius mentioned that potions accidents could be so fun?! Another mad giggle tried to force it's way out his mouth but he clamped down on it. Giggles would give his position away to the enemy, and he couldn't have that now could he? No. He most certainly could not. "Because, deep down, you like danger. And who could deny that I am dangerous?" he heard Sirius say and couldn't help putting in his two cents.
"No-one?" he chimed with a cheeky grin. Sirius looked at him as if he had never seen anything like him before. Remus fought down another mad giggle. Oh such fun!
"How the heck did you get over here when you have class with the Gryffindors on the other side of the castle?!" Sirius asked, eyes wide. Remus smirked in a way eerily like a mix of James' 'I have something planned' smirk and Sirius' own feral grin. It sent chills down the other two Marauder's spines. Remus let out a near inaudible chuckle, he had to allow himself that much for being such a good boy... right?
"Magic."The other Slytherins, and quite a few of the Hufflepuffs, turned in surprise and curiosity when a meaty thud resounded in the hallway. "Hum, face-wall. Something tells me you're doing it wrong," Remus said, creepy smirk still firmly in place. Sirius pried his face from the wall and leveled Remus with a similar, trouble heralding, smirk. Oh yes, this was going to be a wonderful day!
"You're right. This is how it's done!" and with that, Sirius grabbed the back of Remus' head and introduced his face to the wall. Peter snorted, then helped Remus pry himself off the stone of Hogwarts.
"Class?" he asked, voice slightly sarcastic and with a quirked eyebrow. Remus nodded.
"Too right. Well, I'll see you gentlemen later I suppose. Try not to get lynched Sirius, I don't think even James knows enough about you to give a proper eulogy," he said before dashing toward his class. Sirius shook his head.
"Dictionary Breath," he muttered, causing Peter to chuckle. Remus had heard the plans of the Hufflepuffs to get back at Sirius for 'threatening their Baby Puff,' thought he wasn't too worried. Siri was one of the slipperiest people he knew. It was only fitting. He was a snake after all. Oh! Snaky Snakes! Yes, that was an idea... but should it be a targeted prank, or school wide? And how would he pull off such large scale human transfiguration? No-one would help...hum. Perhaps... MASS POTIONS ACCIDENT! YES! Spread the FUN! Oh yes, a simply marvelous idea! But then... how to get the Gryffindor/Slytherin potions class to have the right potions accident? Hum... planning. Moony loves planning! Quick! To the Plan Room! Onward!
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As Peeves watched Remus streak down the hallway trailing laughter that would be more at home with James or Sirius, he knew he simply had to follow. A loopy Lupin promised chaos and mayhem... Peeves' favorite things. Perhaps he had found a way to pick a favorite Marauder? Oh Peevesie would adore that! Now, to find out what Loony Loopy Lupin was up too... It didn't take long for Peeves to find the cackling werewolf hidden in a nook in the library, pouring over potions texts with a mad gleam in his eye and a particularly cracked looking smile twisting his lips. Oh yes, Peevesie was going to enjoy this! They planned pranks on Slytherin, the Great Hall, Slughorn, half of Gryffindor, all four common rooms, and sixty-seven percent of the halls, corridors, and desks. Not the classrooms, the desks. Very important distinction there, yes. "Come Sir Peeves! Chaos and mayhem and fun await!" Remus cried, jumping on a table before dashing off to lay his parts of the pranks. Peeves cackled as he floated off at top speed to do his part as well. Oh, what a glorious day this was! Not that Peeves wasn't going to mock the poor boy mercilessly once whatever happened got undone, but Peeves did nothing if not 'live' in the moment. Oh yes! Hogwarts would remember this day FOREVER! Unless they forced themselves to believe that Remus would never crack like this. That would be sad. Peevesie must help it live on! Yes, Remus was no longer Remus. He was... Loony Loopy Lupin the Magnificent Prankster King of Ultimate Awesomeness and Genius! But let's just call him Loony Loopy Lupin for short. Yes, Loony Loopy Lupin was much better than that mouthful, but Peevesie would never forget. He would forever remember this day and honor the great King! Even if it was mistaken for malicious teasing. He had an image to maintain after all. Couldn't have the other poltergeists thinking he'd gone soft now could he? No. He could not.
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"POTTER! PETTIGREW! BLACK! He's your friend. You catch him!" screeched McGonagal, pointing after the madly cackling Remus who was trailed by not only an equally mirthful Peeves but also an assortment of paperclips, chap-stick tubes, feather boas, chattering Slytherins, maned Gryffindors, pink Hufflepuffs, purple Gryffindors, singing Seventh Years, grunting Ravenclaws, tooting fire pokers, white elephants, ballerina Slytherins, neon Third Years, a tattooed Slughorn, and Second Years stuck to their chairs. Sirius facepalmed. Peter swore he muttered, 'how could I forget that day?!' James whimpered. Remus tossed his robe in the air yelling,
"You'll never catch me! Know why? CAUSE I'M THE GINGERBREAD MAN!" Sirius sighed.
"Severus... would you be so kind as to see to a certain potion for me? I need a cleanser, something that flushes all the pipes. He was in a potions accident. A bad potions accident," he said. Severus took one look at the now singing Remus and paled... further.
"I'll... get right on that," he said, almost as if he wanted to ask, but didn't dare. Sirius nodded, almost to himself, then took another deep breath and slowly let it out.
"James, I need ropes. Good ones. Peter, distraction. Keep him in one room. Can you do that?" he asked. Peter gave him a Look and he nodded back. "Good man. Okay troops... MOVE OUT!" What followed cannot be properly explained nor comprehended. Please, use your imagination as to what catching a very hyper active Remus would be like, then think of the fussiest baby you know and imagine forcing foul tasting medicine down his throat. Then knock him out and tie his to a bed with chains. That's what happened to Remus. He woke up with a raging head ache and a vague sense of loss. He shook it off and forgot about it... until Peeves came to him in an abandoned corridor and called him by his Prankster Title. He grinned wickedly at Peeves.
"The title goes no farther than this... though even the student body will take up Loony Loopy Lupin if someone starts it. I'll play along. It's what I do best, right?" Peeves left with his signature cackle and Lupin had a predatory gleam in his eye before he shook his head and resumed his 'studious Ravenclaw' persona. Who said the world had to know the real pranking geniuses were Eagles? Oh, and whoever said Ravenclaws don't know how to have fun was lying. Just ask the Hufflepuffs.