Title: Nocturne

Author: Shushu

Rating: R (slash =sex between two boys, graphic scenes, don't like, go and get lost!)

Pairing: Draco/Ron

Disclaimers: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

I don't own the poem either.

Author's notes: I hope you like this fic, I'm sorry if I've made some mistakes, but English is not my first language. Thanks to Sara for the "typology" advice, you'll become the most amazing psychologist of the world, honey! This fic is dedicated to little Luca.

"Lay your sleeping head, my love,

Human on my faithless arm;

Time and fevers burn away

Individual beauty from

Thoughtful children, and the grave

Proves the child ephemeral:

But in my arms till break of day

Let the living creature lie,

Mortal, guilty, but to me

The entirely beautiful."

Wystan Hugh Auden, XVIII, Another Time

þ þ þ þ þ þ þ þ

I am wandering along Hogwarts corridors late at night, bare feet. Nobody is around. The moonlight lights slightly my path, but I don't need its pale streams to find my way. I already know it by heart. I could do it with my eyes shut.

I always make the same nightly walk every time I can't sleep. Every time my brain doesn't want to shut up and keeps on tormenting me with my problems, my fears, my feelings. Every time guilt keeps me awake. Every time I feel horny. Every time I want to see him. Every time I need to see him.

Yes, I have to admit it, even though it is hard to. I need him, I need his freckled face, his long strong arms, his sweet chocolate eyes, his warm hands.

Every time I feel insecure, alone, scared, depressed, blue, angry, I run to him. Late at night, so no-one can see us. So no-one can find out our little sinful secret.

I am Ron Weasley's lover.

We started our relationship at the end of our sixth year, when the Wizarding World was upside down because of the Great War. The day we made it for the first time was the last day of the War.

Ron had fought for the Order but he had got seriously injured, so he had to spend the last days of the Battle in the Hospital Wing. He felt frustrated because he couldn't fight with his friends.

I had firstly fought on my father's side, but after a couple of weeks I had understood that Voldemort was just using all of us to destroy the entire world. I was 16 and I did want to live. I decided to betray my parents and spy for the Order. It's the worst thing I have ever done: betray my parents. I did it because I wanted to live, because I wanted to save them too. I thought that if the Order had won, they would have survived like during the First War. My father was a strong man and a powerful wizard. My mother was a very intelligent witch. But it wasn't enough.

My mother got caught and my father died during the fight.

It was all my fault.

The bloody Boy-Who-Lived and his little crew could say everything to console me but I knew the truth. It was my fault.

My father has died to protect me.

He didn't knew I was spying for the Order. But Voldemort had find out and he had decided to kill me. My father saved my life and sacrificed his own. Before the Avada Kedavra curse hit him, he shouted: "Run, Draco, run!"

I ran.

I ran but I didn't know where I was going because my eyes were full of tears and I couldn't see anything. I ran until Severus caught me and gave me a portkey to Hogwarts.

When I arrived Ron was already in the Hospital Wing, sulking and grumbling because he felt useless.

Madame Pomfrey put me in the bed next to his and gave me a couple of potions to heal my bruises and try to calm me down.

He simply stared at me with a worried expression on his freckled face. He didn't know what to do or what to say.

Potter and Granger were there too, they tried to say nice things to me but I told them to fuck off. They went away and called Dumbledore. The old nuisance told me I had done the right thing and thanks to me they had found a way to defeat Voldemort and they could finally face him openly and kill him. I couldn't care less. My father had died because of me.

They all left and prepared for the big fight. The Final Battle.

Night had already fallen.

I was left there with Ron Weasley, who hadn't said a word since I was there.

I had started crying and scratching my arms, trying to hurt myself in order to punish me. He got up, sit on my bed and took me in his arms. I firstly tried to fight against him but then I surrendered to him.

He didn't say anything, he knew words were useless. He just kept on holding me and then, when I calmed down, he started kissing me.

He firstly kissed me slightly on my lips. It was a chaste kiss, but I needed more. I slid my tongue into his mouth because I wanted to taste him, to feel his warmth. I felt cold and frozen inside, I needed his warmth. I kissed him desperately and he didn't stop me. He let me kiss him and kissed me back. And when I started undressing him, he let me do it and undressed me, slowly and shyly, staring at my body with hungry misty eyes.

I needed him and he let me took him even if he was still a virgin and I could have hurt him. He was so clumsy and sheepish that I felt like crying again and again because this fragile boy had decided to trust me and let me take advantage of him.

"I've betrayed my parents. My father has died because of me. How can you trust me?", I had asked him.

He was lying on my bed, on top of me, completely naked with my arms around him. He blushed and shrugged.

"I don't think you'll hurt me. I can see it in your eyes."

"And what else do you see in my eyes?"

"I can see that you need me now. Take me if you want to…"

I felt a tear fell from my eye and he wiped it away with a tender kiss.

"Make love to me, Draco"

I did as I was told and tried my best not to hurt him.

Then I slept safe in his arms, where I felt I could face all the pain and the guilt.

On the same day, while we were making love on a hospital bed, the Boy-Who-Lived killed Voldemort. My mother was caught and imprisoned. Ron's best friend, Hermione Granger, died in the Battle.

Ron said he had always loved her as a sister. I don't know if he said that to convince himself or to convince me. He was completely broken, devastated by the pain. He couldn't stop crying and screaming and no-one could even touch him.

When everyone left us alone, I sat on his bed, took him in my arms and cuddled him silently, as he had done with me the previous day. He let me touch him and hold him. And he let me make love to him again, in order to soothe his pain.

We started doing it every night, every time people left us alone. It was a cure, it was a way of consoling each other.

I could find peace only in his arms and he felt just the same.

When Madame Pomfrey sent us back to our dormitories, I feared I would have never slept with him again and I felt desperate because I needed him.

But as we left the Hospital Wing, he took me to an empty classroom, closed the door behind our backs and embraced me tightly.

"Please, don't leave me…" he pleaded softly.

"I won't", I whispered to him.

He gave me the password to his Tower and the same night I came to visit him and I slept with him.

þ þ þ þ þ þ þ þ

As I reach his Tower, I think about the reason why I have come here this time. My mother and the other Death Eaters are about to be given the Dementors' kiss. After a very long trial, the Tribunal has finally decided what to do with them. I already knew this was going to happen sooner or later, but I guess I still had a bit of hope in my heart that they could decide not to kill her.

My mother is about to die.

I feel a shiver run along my spine. My head spins and my mouth is dry. I can feel something like a burden on the left side of my chest.

My heart hurts.

My mother is about to die.

She has killed some people during her "career" as a Death Eater. She has tried to destroy the world with Voldemort. She has believed and said a lot of stupid and terrible things about Mudbloods and Muggles.

But, yet, she is my mother.

My mommy.

I still love her, even if she is "evil".

I need Ron.

So I am going to his room, to find peace in his arms.

I always meet him late at night and nobody knows about us, neither does the Boy-Who-Lived, his best friend.

I don't care about the other wizards' opinion, nor if his friend think we are doing something sick or immoral.

I love him and I need him. Nothing else matters to me.

But maybe he doesn't feel the same. Maybe he is ashamed of me and our relationship. I don't know, I haven't had the guts to ask him a thing like this.

I don't even know if he loves me or if he just likes shagging me.

"Funeral Blues", I whisper to the portrait of the Fat Lady and it opens softly. I go into the empty common room, reach the door of his dorms and enter quietly. All the boys are asleep, snoring or muttering something in their sleep.

I climb Ron's bed, close the curtains around us and cast a locking spell and a couple of silencing ones.

He is sleeping sound. I can only see his red head peeping out of the covers. He is so beautiful and peaceful. I stare at him silently, gently stroking his hair and caressing his face. I kiss his closed eyelids and they open slowly. He stares at me for a while before he smiles and hugs me.

"Get under the covers, Draco"

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to awake you, I was just wondering if I could sleep here with you. Just sleep, you know…and tomorrow morning I promise I will leave before your roommates wake up…"

He looks at me with a puzzled face.

"Just sleep?…Why?"

"You were sleeping so peacefully…and I always come here in the middle of the night and wake you up, bothering you…I'm sorry, you must be fed up with me…"

"Fed up with you? Me?!? What are you talking about?"

"…"

"Stop talking nonsense and get under the covers"

I do as he says and I find out he is completely naked.

…

Maybe he has been doing it with someone else before I came here.

"Ron…you are naked…maybe I've come in the wrong moment…"

"What are you babbling about, Draco? I was just waiting for you!"

"You were waiting for me?…Naked?"

"Yes, so I was ready to make love to you"

Oh Merlin…

"And how did you know I was coming?"

"I found out about your mother and the other Death Eaters and so I thought you would have come…"

"I'm sorry…I always disturb you…"

"No! You never disturb me! I was just worried about you. I'm sorry about your mother, Draco…"

Why are his eyes so sad? I can't understand; I should be the desperate one, then why is he crying?

"Why are you crying, Ron?", I ask softly as I embrace him tightly and put a butterfly kiss on his forehead.

"I don't know, I guess it's because I feel sad for you. I looked into your eyes and I suddenly felt like crying…"

"Thanks, honey"

"Why have you thanked me?"

"Because you are so sweet and tender to me. I don't deserve that. I don't deserve you, you're too good for a traitor like me…"

"Oh, stop saying all those mean things about the boy I'm in love with!"

What?

…

Have I heard correctly?

He said: " the boy I'm in love with"

Meaning me????

…

"Draco, why are you so surprised? I thought you had already understood it."

"…"

"I'm in love with you"

"…"

"You don't have to tell me how you feel right now, but I hope you will tell me sooner or later…"

"…"

"Draco?"

"…"

"Say something, please!"

"…"

"Are you mad at me? Do you want to stop seeing me because I've fallen in love with you? Was it just sex for you?"

"…"

"…"

He starts sobbing in my arms and I finally realize I haven't said anything. I was so paralyzed with happiness that I went completely speechless. And Ron keeps on crying because he thinks I don't love him.

I am an idiot.

"Ron, I'm so sorry…"

He hiccups and stares at me with wide eyes

"You mean that you are sorry because you don't love me…?"

"NO, no no! You have misunderstood, Ron"

"Then what?"

"I'm sorry because I've made you cry. I love you too"

He stops crying and opens his mouth.

"You-you-you…"

"Yes, I love you…"

"Really?"

"Yes"

"And it wasn't just sex for you?"

"No, it was love from the first time, honey."

"Thanks…"

"You're welcome!"

We look at each other and start laughing for no reason. Maybe we laugh because we are happy.

He loves me…

The world seems suddenly so beautiful and this bed is the most special place of the universe for me because I am sharing it with my love.

"Draco…"

"Yes, honey?"

"Well, you know, you said you just wanted to sleep, but…I mean…"

"Do you want to make love?"

"Yes…", he blushes.

" Ok, and besides, you are already naked and I'm in your fluffy bed, it would be a pity not to do it "

He chuckles and I start taking my clothes off, but he stops me.

"Draco, please let me do it!"

"Do you want to undress me?"

"Yes, I want to take care of you tonight, just relax and let me do everything"

"…love you…". He smiles at me and starts kissing me passionately, slowly unbuttoning my shirt. He kisses my mouth, my cheeks, my eyes, my earlobes, sucking them slightly and then he kisses his way down my neck until he reaches my nipples. While he sucks and bites them slightly, he unzips my trousers and takes them off.

"I've told Harry about us"

The statement startles me.

"What?!"

"I've told Harry that I love you and that we have an affair…" he says, getting rid of my boxers. I am completely naked and he stares at my nudity with lustful eyes.

Merlin…

"And what did he say?"

He touches my erected member and starts stroking it so slowly that I think he wants to drive me literally crazy.

"He was very surprised and a bit horrified too, but he said that even if he doesn't like you, he will accept our relationship because we are friends and I'm like a brother to him."

Too slowly…

"Ron, please…"

His strokes become a little faster, but not enough…

"Ron…you didn't like me either, before I jumped you in the Hospital Wing…"

He chuckles and stops touching me.

"That's true, but I've understood that sometimes people are different from what they seem."

He takes me into his mouth and starts sucking.

"Ron, I…I'm almost…"

I come into his mouth and he swallows all my cum. Then he asks me to spread my legs and mutters: "lubricus".

The lubricant spell makes me feel ready to take him into myself. I stare into his eyes and kiss him tenderly.

"Take me…"

He enters me slowly and when he is all inside of me, he doesn't move and gazes at me.

"Draco…last year I would have never thought I could have fallen in love with you and now I can't even imagine a life without you. Have you bewitched me?"

"What if I did?"

"Please, tell me that a counter-curse doesn't exist"

We smile and he starts moving a bit.

"Draco…"

"Ron…"

He moves and strokes me at the same time and I think I won't last long…

"Draco, next week…I want…ah…I want to go back home for…for Christmas holidays…and then…oh, please…"

"And then?"

"And then…I want to tell my parents about…about us…"

His thrusts become more and more rapid and I am really about to come into his hands.

Oh my God…

"Draco…"

"Yes…ah…"

"Will you…will you come home with me?"

"Ron, I…Oh Merlin…I'm coming…"

"Then…you agree and you'll come with me?"

"Yeeeeesssssss…………."

And I come, followed by my sweet love, who shouts my name and collapses into my arms panting.

þ þ þ þ þ þ þ þ

We are lying peacefully in each other's arms on his bed and I am kissing his forehead when I suddenly have a doubt.

"Ron, did you ask me something while we were making love before?"

"Hmm?"

"I mean, I just remember you saying something about your parents and Christmas holidays…but you know that I can't understand anything at all while I'm making it, don't you?"

"Right…"

"Did I say something?"

"Yes, but it's nothing important…we will talk about it tomorrow morning, ok?"

"Ok"

"Now sleep, love"

"Goodnight, honey"

"Nighty night, love"

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The End

Did you like it? If you think it doesn't suck too much, please review!