- The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out
You left me in the dark
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight
In the shadow of your heart -
Cosmic Love by Florence and the Machine
Prologue.
How long Rose Tyler stared at the ocean, she didn't know. She only knew that in this moment she stared into it and it stared back. She felt at peace standing on that jagged edge, storm chasing storm across the horizon. The Doctor had called her to Bad Wolf Bay. To her namesake. Just to say goodbye? No, she didn't think so.
Oh sure, he thought it was impossible. That she could never return to him, could not keep her promise. They would have no forever. However, she would have believed half the things she'd seen were impossible only a short two years ago. She felt her lips quirk in a parody of a smile. That was the problem with 900-year-old aliens. They tended to think they knew it all.
An errant tear slid down her cheek, freezing to her skin. She should go. She felt her mum, Mickey, and her not-father's eyes on her back. But she wanted to stay just a bit longer. To listen to the echo of the words he hadn't said in this cold gray place.
The car door opened behind her. "Rose! Rose! A storm's movin' in." Mickey fought the growing wind to her spot on the bluff. "Rose, we need to go. Your mum's raving about catching the last Zeppelin outta here."
Zeppelin. She frowned. His voice was grating on the shield of this sanctuary she'd found. She wasn't ready to leave. "Tell 'em to go ahead. There was a hotel about an hour up the road, yeah? Wait for me there."
"What do you mean wait for you there? That's ridiculous. The storm they're showin' on the weather is massive. And you want to stay on some deserted beach in the middle of it!" The wind whipped his scarf around his neck. Rose stepped away to avoid a face full of it.
"Yeah Mickey. I do. Tell mum not to worry. I've survived worse than this. I-" she tilted her head towards him, an eye still on the waves. "I just need to be here for a bit. I can make my own way back to the hotel."
"If you think your mother is going to let you stay on this beach then you've really gone mental. You kno-" he was cut off abruptly as the wind completely snatched his scarf from around his neck and, lunging after it too late, it flew over the edge of the cliff face. He turned back to Rose, ready to resume his argument. His eyes met hers, and his features softend, and for a moment he looked her over, almost as if he could sense the storm brewing inside. "Alright then" he said, "Stay. We'll see you at the hotel." His hand squeezed her shoulder. "You're not alone Rose."
She nodded. Her head turning back to the ocean, she answered, "More than you know, Mickey."
He didn't seem to know what to say to that. She listened to him stumble back to the car, the snick of the car door opening and the slam as he closed it harder than necessary. She almost laughed out loud when she heard her mother's shout, from an enclosed vehicle, 50 meters away, over the whipping wind.
The car pulled away slowly, and she was finally, mercifully, alone. The rain began to fall while the gray swirls of cloud were quickly becoming black, and despite what Mickey seemed to think, she wasn't an idiot. She'd checked the weather map on her laptop that morning. An angry looking mass of red pixels thundering towards the bay had been the last image she'd looked at before powering it down and stowing it in the boot.
The oncoming storm. She felt her lower lip tremble. The three months here had been hellish. She was stranded in this world that wasn't hers, with a not-father and a would-be lover. Christ, it wasn't fair. She'd made her choice. She was never gonna leave him. What-ifs? and whys? chased their way around her head, going in circles. Who was she really to say that she, a girl without even her A-levels, could do the impossible? She would never see his smile again, or that stupid pinstriped suit, or watch him lick walls and chase bad guys and save people. She wouldn't be there to help him. He would have to find someone else. She already couldn't stand to see people in Chucks, and there were no doctors, only physicians. Oh God, she couldn't take it.
She screamed into the storm, the full force of it beginning to land. She screamed and raged and demanded that someone, something, tell her why this was happening. Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. Where was it now? Where was this powerful all-seeing creature she'd been?
How was she supposed to live without- after what she'd seen, the things she'd done, the worlds, and the lives she helped save? She felt as though the very thought would swallow her whole. She'd be chewed up and spit out, torn to bits by the gnashing teeth of a world she didn't belong in.
Time moved quickly, and in the blink of an eye the storm was pushing on. The thunder had softened, and Rose found her heart still, and her mind grow quiet. Her throat hurt, and her hands and feet were numbed with cold.
Soaked to the bone, she turned away from the choppy waters, and began to pick her way to the road with newfound determination. It bubbled to the surface; she could feel it bloom in her heart.
If he was the Oncoming Storm, then she was the eye at its center. She would not blink. She would not falter. She was finished being a victim. She was Rose Tyler, she was Bad Wolf.
So my first Doctor Who fic. My thanks to my brilliant and fantastic Beta JayBee Bug. Many thanks for rambling with me, and making sure I remembered to draw the ears.
