(Fun fact: Because of a chemical imbalance in his body, Lucent sleeps very little (insomnia) and has no control over when he does (narcolepsy). This same imbalance also causes him to be synesthetic.

Read and review, please.)

Chk chk chk.

Nitrine groaned and pulled his pillow over his head. For a moment, the noise stopped, but then:

Chk chk chk.

"Shironaaa," he whined, slowly rolling out of bed. Rubbing his eyes, he glanced at his clock, which flashed the time: 4:46. He sighed, and shuffled towards the door. Sometimes, that woman could be as bad as... "Lucent!"

Lucent jumped, nearly dropping his Rubik's cube as he cast a bewildered glance towards his brother. "Ah..." He pushed himself into a sitting position from where he lay on the couch, and his expression shifted to one of concern. "I'm sorry; did I wake you?"

"Nn... It's ok..." Nitrine scratched his head and walked over, his gaze on Lucent's hands. "Whuzzat...?"

Lucent tossed the cube from hand to hand. "Oh, nothing. Just a Rubik's cube." He held it up to Nitrine, proffering the toy. "Did you want to try?"

Nitrine accepted, turning it in his hands. He had never seen this before... it seemed pretty old; it was covered in scrapes and gashes from Lucent's careless handling. Some squares were so damaged only a tiny corner indicated what color it was supposed to be. He didn't even try; the puzzle was much too difficult for this time of night. He handed it back. "Lucent, what are you doing here..?"

"Well, I..." Lucent glanced up with a small smirk, turning the returned cube in his hands, "couldn't sleep."

"Why did you come here..?"

He shrugged. "Didn't wanna be home."

"Oh..." Nitrine turned; at this point he just wanted to go back to sleep. "Then... shh... ok?"

"Of course." Lucent smiled. "I'm done anyways." And he put the completed cube down on the table. He swung his legs back up onto the couch and rested his twined fingers upon his belly. His peripherals pulsed a dark green as he heard Nitrine fall back onto his bed, and he closed his eyes and listened. Faintly, he could hear it. He could see it. The palest shades of blue, undulating across his field of vision. Nitrine's breathing. He could see the rate change as his brother slipped away; soon, he recognized that it would slow no more. Nitrine had returned to sleep. Lucent opened his his eyes and swung to his feet, standing up. Tentatively, almost shyly, he entered his brother's room and knelt by the bed. He knew it was clichéd, but he did love to watch others sleep. They always looked so peaceful. Nitrine especially. Smiling faintly, he reached out, but then hesitated and drew back. He didn't want to risk waking him again, so instead, he folded his arms beneath him, and watched the gentle rise and fall of the blankets. He was able to enjoy it, for a while. Less than an hour had passed when he felt the irresistible crush of exhaustion. Like always, he didn't stand a chance. He was asleep in moments.

Nitrine awoke to the startling sight of his brother so close; he nearly fell out of the bed in a bout of spazzy surprise. "Nn..." Lucent buried his face a little deeper into his arms, and Nitrine leaned in a little closer. Was he really...? Eyes closed, slow breath, yes: Lucent was asleep! Carefully, quietly, Nitrine crept out of the room and shut the door behind him, letting his brother sleep. But then the question occurred to him: Why was Lucent kneeling right there? He looked back at the door, then went to the kitchen to prepare his breakfast, worries filling his head. By the time he spooned the bacon and eggs onto the plate, he was a nervous wreck. Lucent wasn't doing lewd things by his bed, was he? He hadn't been touched in his sleep, had he? There was no way a brother could feel that way for another! ...Was there? No, no! Nitrine shook his head, slamming the pan down on the counter. Lucent was a good guy, despite, despite... He stopped the thought there. Lucent was a good guy. With a sigh, Nitrine moved to wash the dishes, trying to clear his mind when the door to his room opened. "Sorry..." mumbled Lucent, walking over, rubbing his eyes. "I didn't mean to fall asleep." Quickly growing alert, he blinked at the food. "You made breakfast?"

Nitrine nodded, looking at Lucent and wondering. "Yeah, help yourself." Could he really..?

"Thank you." Lucent picked up his plate and sat down in a chair where he gingerly began eating. Nitrine hurriedly finished his cleaning so he could join him, and as he ate, glanced repeatedly at his brother. The thoughts wouldn't let him be. There was only one way to end it. As Lucent got up to put his plate away, Nitrine asked.

"Lucent?"

"Hm?" Rising from putting the plate in the dishwasher, Lucent turned back towards him.

Nitrine hesitated, for a moment discouraged, nervous, then blurted, "Do you love me more than you should?"

Lucent stiffened a bit, his pulse picking up, and his forehead creased as he drew his nonexistant brows together and tilted his head. "Wha... What do you mean?"

"W-well, you come around so often... and you were by my bed this morning... and and the way you look at me sometimes..." Anxiously, he met Lucent's gaze. Lucent quickly looked away. "Do you love me more than you should?" he repeated.

Lucent closed his eyes tight for a moment, a shameful blush rising to his cheeks as he opened them again. His answer came in a whisper. "I do... I have for a long time."

Nitrine was right. It was a bit of a relief, but if that was the case... then all his other worries were distinct possibilities. All those hugs... The one time they had shared a bed... Nitrine pulled a face, shifting anxiously in his chair, but he tried, and failed, to keep his voice normal. "S-so, last night, you weren't doing anything... were you?"

Lucent looked over, blinked in surprise, and answered firmly, "No! When I'm with you, my mind is not in a dirty place. I don't... I don't think about those sorts of things when I'm with you, awake or not. Please don't think I do. Please."

Nitrine heaved a sigh of relief, comforted somewhat, though a seed of doubt remained in his mind. Family history made the claim dubious at worst, no more than likely at best. Yet he could see the desperation on his brother's face, in his eyes. "...You know I don't feel the same. I can't. You're my brother! And some of the things you do..." Nitrine squirmed.

Lucent sighed. Yes, he knew, but to hear it spoken somehow hurt a bit more. It reminded him of what a sick fuck he was. "Yes. I know. I'm not asking you to. I just..." He walked over and picked up his brother's hand, barely grasping it in both of his own. "I just don't want our relationship to change."

Nitrine resisted the urge to pull his hand away, and looked down at their hands, then up at Lucent. "...I don't think that's possible. I'm sorry."

Lucent sighed, his expression clenching along with his hold on Nitrine's hand. His hurt shone clear, moisture catching in his lashes, but suddenly his shoulders dropped and his expression cleared. Hurt gave way to resignation. His voice turned listless. "I understand. I... I'll go. Thanks for breakfast, Nitrine. Thanks for listening." The first tear fell before he could disappear.

Nitrine sighed, letting his head drop onto his empty plate. "What a mess."

(To be continued.)