Summary: What happens at Hogwarts when a few familiar faces return as "House Parents"? Different students' perspectives; mainly Gryffindor oriented. Not book compatible. "House Parents" are people that act as guardians to children living in a dorm at boarding school. It is under this premise I bring you this story, which will hopefully be funny and light hearted.
Disclaimer: I do not own.
"Merlin, Katie! I said I was sorry!" Fred Weasley shouted as he ran full-force through the Great Hall, not caring to notice the curious looks and laughter that followed him. His only concern was the angry teenage girl chasing him, and she was gaining ground.
"YES FRED, BUT THAT HARDLY MAKES UP FOR THE THREE MONTH'S DETENTION I GOT BECAUSE OF YOU! YO-YOU GET BACK HERE, YOU INSUFFERABLE GIT!" shouted aforementioned girl, who was unsuccessfully trying to grab her wand out of her pocket while chasing down the redhead. Unfortunately for her, she didn't notice as Fred stopped short a few feet ahead of her, and so she collided into the back of him – sending both of them sprawling.
"Merlin, Fred, why do you have to be such an-" Katie groaned, as she tried to untangle herself from her now least-favourite twin. She stopped herself short though, as she gazed up at the reason for Fred's sudden abandonment of the chase – their head of House.
"Miss Bell, if you wish remain on the favourable side of your housemate's I should warn you that if you finish that sentence I will be forced to deduct a further 20 points from Gryffindor, on top of the 50 I am taking for your incorrigible conduct. Mr Weasley, please abstain from provoking your housemates and peers so openly, it does nothing for your reputation – which, I might add, is already in tatters," Minerva McGonagall decreed, with just a hint of a glint in her eye, at the two youth's in front of her "now sit yourself down at your table, the Headmaster has an announcement for the school."
"Yes Professor," the two teenagers replied before re-assuming the chase – Katie shrieking as Fred chased her to their usual spot at Gryffindor table. McGonagall allowed herself a small smile before returning to her previous task of ushering all the students into the Hall so they could get started. Today was going to be a different day for the Hogwarts students.
The Great Hall was filled to the brim with all the occupants of the Castle; students and teachers alike, as well as Peeves, all the resident ghosts, Filch and Mrs. Norris. It fell into silence as Albus Dumbledore took to the podium at the front of the Hall to commence his announcement.
"It is with my great pleasure that I announce the returning of some old friends to Hogwarts. It has come to my attention that lately inter-house spirit has started to dwindle and that you, as students, are becoming more discouraged with the notion that your house is your family during your time at Hogwarts. So it is my pleasure to announce that from now on, each house is going to have a set of 'House Parents' whom have been picked from a selection of volunteers made up of past students. They are going to act, essentially, as your parents – organising inter-house bonding events, assigning chores and punishments, providing guidance, advice and assistance for those who seek it and they will also seek to assist your Head's of Houses in minimising their duties – allowing them to focus more on their teaching responsibilities. I find it imperative that I stress upon you the fact that your house parents will not be able to take house points, so anything you wish to tell them is confidential. Any problems they may have with what you tell them they may direct upon to the House Head, but I stress that it is important that you trust them. They are here to help you feel more at home. Any questions can be directed towards the "parents" themselves or your head of house. Now, please enjoy a special treat on behalf of the newcomer's, and our faithful elves, a late-night feast. I'm sure all of you are very eager to return to your dorm's where await your House Parents."
And with a clap and flourish of his hands, dessert to rival that which would be found in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory appeared on the four House tables in the Great Hall. A great buzz filled the hall as everyone digested the news and threw suggestions into the air as to who exactly these "House Parents" would be, and whether they were a good idea or not.
Ron Weasley was certainly not a fan of the idea, as he expressed to his two best-friends through a mouthful of food. Hermione, with a disgusted look on her face, simply turned to Harry and said "What I think Ronald is trying to say, is that these two "parents" as we are to call them are just going to be stuffy old witches and wizards who won't be able to tell the difference between the wizarding rules and teenage problems of now, and those of the last millennium."
Ron simply looked at Hermione and then nodded his assent to Harry, with a surprised expression on his face the whole time. "Blimey Hermione, that's exactly what I meant." Harry, meanwhile, looked between the two with a small smirk on his face – "So then, this whole thing is just another way to make us miserable? What if we get some old toad like Umbridge or, Merlin forbid, Fudge himself?" The Golden Trio all shuddered, and continued their conversation, each submitting an even more severe name until they had thoroughly ridded themselves of any inital joy at the announcement.
Further up the table, Katie Bell, Angelina Johnson, Alicia Spinnet, Lee Jordan and Fred and George Weasley sat discussing the exact same topic. They, too, had the same hesitations about having another authority figure overseeing the goings on of their house – especially one that would be permanently in the Common Room and whom had 24/7 access to their dormitories. The twins were not as worried as the others, merely enjoying that they would soon have two more unknowing bodies upon which to test their products.
"You see George, it won't take much. Why-"
"I can see it now Fred, the beauty of it really does-"
"Bring a tear to my, well I should say our, eyes."
With this, they both faked wiping away a tear as their circle of friends turned to look at them. Katie was the first to speak "Are you mad? These poor people are probably going to be retired Aurors or something who're at their wits end. The moment you try anything they'll probably collapse of a heart attack. I, for one, am not having a death on my conscience."
"Ah, Kates." sighed Fred, with just a hint of humor "If only you knew what we had in store for you. Now, love, don't take this the wrong way but you always think we're going to kill someone! Frankly, I'm getting tired of your pessimistic routine." Angelina, George and Alicia all shot Fred a 'Oh-no-you-didn't' glance before Katie shot up out of her seat with an indignant look on her face, visibly shaking with rage "Well, Fred, it might pain you to know this but not everybody in the world is as careless as you are. Some people might have real problems – just because you're ignorant of them, doesn't mean everyone is!"
Fred's smirk dropped from his face as Katie threw her napkin onto her plate and stormed out of the Great Hall. "What'samatterwithKatie?" asked Lee, who'd only just surfaced from behind a pile of food. Angelina and Alicia shot Fred a look before Alicia turned to Lee – "Well, your buddy over there has decided to send my best-friend into another rotten mood. If you hadn't noticed, Fred, Katie hasn't been having the best time of late. Sharpen up will you, or you'll end up in the infirmary." And with that, the two girls remaining at the table stood up and chased after Katie.
Fred looked over to Lee and his brother to see the former still with a confused on his face and the latter with silent tears of laughter running down his cheeks. "Oh Freddy, my dear, dear, brother. You have messed up royally, again."
Author's note: Thoughts? :)