Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Summary: 'She couldn't fall in love with me...I'm not Sasuke.' In which Naruto is naive, and Sakura has the answer to his worries. NaruSaku, oneshot
Yes, I'm back at angst. Aren't you all excited with tear-fest anticipation? But anyway, this is my first attempt at NaruSaku, so I hope you enjoy!
Here ya go!
Not Sasuke
Sakura-chan and I have been dating for about two years now.
Yes, that's right. Uzumaki Naruto finally got the girl after all these years of pining after her. I finally have her. Finally.
But sometimes I wonder, even though we are together, if she really isn't mine.
Sometimes I wonder, late at night, while holding her slim frame to my muscular one, if she really is in love with me like she says she is. If she really would do anything for me like she said she would. If she really is completely...over him like she says she is.
She says things to me that make me really believe she is in love with me, but I have right to ponder where I really do stand with the pink haired woman.
I love Sakura-chan so much. With all my heart. I am free to say that. Not embarrassed. I'm never embarrassed to admit my feelings to her, whether it be when we are all alone or in front of all of Konohagakure. I had even shouted it from the roof of my house, and it had earned me a hard lump on my head from Sakura-chan's fist. Yes, after all these years, she still scolds me. But it's a playful scold, not like the "I hate you" ones of the past.
Despite her joking around with me, her soft glances my way, the way she says my name now...I still don't know if she really truly feels the affection for me that I feel for her.
I still don't know if she feels that same thing she felt for that bastard all those years ago.
Even though he hurt her so many times, she never gave up on him. Never. Until she actually accepted my invitation to the ramen stand one night after he betrayed us. It made me curious. Did she actually forget about the teme and want to go? Or did she want to get her mind off of that man? Hell, maybe she just pitied me. But at the time it didn't matter, because I was too happy that my precious Sakura-chan was coming with me on a date of sorts.
It all went uphill from there. We officially became a couple a few weeks afterward. And I had been the happiest I had been in a very long time. As long as I was with her, I was content. To be around her was like...I don't even have any words to describe it. It's just the feeling I had when I was around her was different than when I was around any other girl. My heart would skip. Palms would become sweaty. Mouth would be dry. My face would flush when she looked at me with that soft, kind, caring look. Like she loved me.
She had admitted it to me, too.
"I love you, Naruto."
It would always send chills up and down my spine. I would say it back, of course, meaning every single syllable of it.
I am a little unsure about whether she means it or not now.
I have my reasons for thinking this way; it is not just out of paranoia.
He had returned. For what reasons, I don't know.
And with the reappearance of him came the results that have been the bane of me for a while - worry, fear, and sleepless nights. On most of those evenings, Sakura-chan would wake from her sleep, sensing something was disturbing me, and ask what was wrong. To this, I would reply with the usual, "Nothing's wrong, Sakura-chan, try and get some sleep, okay?" She would sigh and say she would, but I could tell she was awake as long as I was.
I know I am scared.
I hate to admit I'm afraid, but I am.
I don't want to lose her to him.
No.
Not again.
I saw how he had looked at her when he came back. He looked her up and down with those cold, callous eyes, and a slight smirk played on his lips.
It was as if he knew he could take her from me.
And, maybe a part of me felt like he could steal her away.
That is one of the few things that I won't say out loud.
Part of me says, "I will never let him have Sakura-chan. He doesn't deserve someone as great as she is. If he even looks at her the wrong way, I will beat the life out of him."
The other, more tame, part is more...attentive to her feelings, "If she wants to be with him, then I will let her. As long as she's happy. It'll hurt like hell if I have to let her go, but she deserves happiness..."
Sometimes, I'm just defeated with this whole situation. I end up thinking negatively and putting myself down. Voices come out of nowhere and threaten my state of security at where I stand with her.
Why do you criticize the teme?
You might not be good enough for her, you know.
She might still love him.
It's always a possibility.
Like I don't know that already!
I'm not as dumb as I let on. It is a very likely possibility that she isn't in love with me, although she says she is.
The bastard was her first love, after all. And it is said by many that a first love is hard to forget.
And that makes me think that she couldn't fall in love with me...I'm not Sasuke.
It also makes me think about how hard it's going to be for me if I have to let her go.
I can't...
I don't...
I don't know if I can take that pain.
But I'm a shinobi. Shinobi are supposed to be able to handle any kind of pain.
Obviously the person who came up with that didn't know this particular kind of hurt.
"Naruto..." I'm snapped out of my reverie by her soft voice.
I turn, looking for her face in the dark of my room. The only light is that of the moon streaming in from the large window, it cascades in, illuminating everything with it's silver light. I don't say anything, just smile at her tenderly, taking in the sight of her. She looks rather tired, having just gotten in from her training with Tsunade-baachan, but she gives me a smile despite that. Her eyes glint in the moonlight and she runs a hand through her hair.
"Welcome back, Sakura-chan." I smile, closing my eyes in my usual grin, although I don't feel up to putting on this cheerful front at all.
"Glad to be back." She replies, smiling a bit more now that I have one on my face as well.
That's when she walks over to me and plants a soft kiss on my lips. It's nice and tender and...just very Sakura, if that's a way to describe it.
But even now, I'm wondering if she's picturing that Uchiha instead of me.
I place my hand on the back of her head and pull her closer to me.
It's beginning to get heated. She's deepening the kiss even more. I respond. Our hands are grasping, caressing, holding each other, desperately wanting to be closer to one another, although being closer than we already are is not possible. I gently lead her over to the bed, and she doesn't resist, and I'm glad she isn't totally turned off by me nowadays.
Clothes are stripped from one another, thrown on the bed haphazardly. It doesn't matter that there's a mess around us. She doesn't seem to care, and neither do I.
She gives me that look with her eyes and I smirk slightly at her as I arrange myself on top of her. I look at her, as if to ask if she's ready. She gives a short nod and I cover her mouth with my own. I sink myself into her and she arches her back like a cat, moaning into my mouth as she does so.
During this whole process, could she be imagining my hair darkening, lengthening, and becoming raven black? Could she be picturing my eyes becoming cold and dark, with no warmth whatsoever?
Could she want me to be Sasuke instead of Naruto?
She fists one hand in my hair and the other around my waist, beckoning me to come closer, all the while whispering my name over and over.
My name.
Not Sasuke's.
It's so sincere.
"Naruto..." She groans, arching up to meet my ear, her breath tickling my skin.
She climaxes and I follow right after her, grunting her name. And we just lay there, with me on top of her, panting, sweaty, and she's even more tired than when she came home. I kiss her breast and look into her eyes, not saying anything with words, but she knows what I mean and she smiles with a beautiful, serene, upward curve of the lips and puts a hand on my wet hair.
I roll off of her and bring her under the covers of the bed with me. She turns to look at the window and my hands reach and clasp around her slim waist, bringing her closer.
I don't know what came over me, but the next words out of my mouth were, "I'm not Sasuke, you know."
She seems to tense under my touch for a second before saying, "I know that..."
It's quiet for a while.
"...that's why I fell for you."
She turns to face me, our eyes meet. Crystal blue meets forest green. My heart nearly stops in my chest as she gives me the most serene look any one could ever muster, "You're the complete opposite of him, Naruto. You're kind and sweet. You're determined. You have dreams and ambitions that I admire. You wouldn't sell out your values for anything." She blushes, "And you're handsome..." She trails off as she strokes a whisker mark on my cheek, "...and sexy."
My cheeks heat up and turn the bright scarlet red of a tomato.
"And you're just...everything to me, Naruto."
I gulp, "But...you were in love with him, weren't you?"
"For a while, yes. But what I felt for him is totally different than what I feel for you now." She explains, never taking her eyes from mine, "It was puppy love...and now, with you..."
I look at her as she tries to gather her words.
"...with you, to me, it's the real thing."
I dip my head and kiss her collarbone, "Thank you..."
She looks at me quizzically. I only smile at her brightly, feeling as if a weight had been lifted from my chest.
"You feel the same, right?" She asks, quirking an eyebrow in a playful gesture, almost as if she already knows the answer.
"Of course."
She yawns and closes her eyes, "Good..."
I hold her close as she lets sleep claim her, lightly stroking her hair as I do so.
I take in my surroundings. Being close to her, feeling her warmth, knowing she loves me just as much, if not more, than I do...
Everything just feels right.
End.
Alright, there it was. Wow, it was sappy. I'm sorry if you hated it, but I'm not sorry if you loved it! If that makes any sense. I tried to test my little lemon talent, but I didn't do anything graphic, simply because I don't want to risk being kicked off of And I thought anything too like porn-ish would ruin the mood I set for this.
Okay, so please R & R! Kind reviews will be rewarded greatly and flames will be doused with water balloons!
Arigato!