The Great Debate
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis.
One Shot
Leon Maxwell, the red-eyed swordsman powerhouse Crisis, had just changed into some casual clothes after a sword-training simulation. He shook his head, thinking,
That sword program Monica hooked up is great. It's really helping me learn how to use this thing.
Just then, there was a loud crash as something fragile was broken. A familiar female voice shouted,
"CSI is the best!"
Another familiar female voice shot back,
"NCIS is the best!"
"CSI!"
"NCIS!"
"CSI!"
"NCIS!"
Another crash was heard, and a brawl had broken out. Crisis ran as fast as he could.
When he got into the room, he noticed his girlfriend Farrah Willows, the heroine Persiana, attempting to scratch Carol Danvers, the heroine Miss Marvel, with her claws. The blonde Air Force brat threw the feral back and shouted,
"NCIS is the best show on the planet!"
Persiana somersaulted and landed on all fours. She roared,
"CSI is the best show on the planet!"
The two then resumed their cat-fight.
Sam Wilson, the avian hero Falcon, cheered on,
"Go! Go! Go!"
T'challa, the Black Panther, groaned,
"Sam, must you encourage them?"
Hercules, the brown-haired teen god of strength, laughed,
"Let these fair maidens fight! It makes for good entertainment!"
Natasha Romanoff, the teen Avenger Black Widow, sighed angrily,
"Again? Not this early, please? I haven't had my coffee yet."
Leon shook his head,
"What are they fighting about this time?"
He was starting to get sick of the two of these girls fighting.
Farrah looked up and cheered,
"Sweetie!"
She went to pounce her boyfriend when Carol grabbed her tail and yanked hard, causing the teen cat-girl to get slammed to the floor. The blonde then hovered near Leon,
"Hi, handsome."
Farrah looked up; shooting the most venomous glare she could give. She roared,
"DIE, BARBIE!"
She tackled Miss Marvel and the two rolled on the floor, the cat-fight resuming.
Leon rubbed the bridge of his nose,
"That's it. I've had enough of this."
He shouted,
"KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW!"
Both the fighting women stood at attention. Crystal, the Inhuman elementalle princess, came sleepily in,
"What's going on? Who's shouting?"
Crisis rubbed the back of his head,
"Sorry, Crys. Carol and Farrah were fighting…again."
The white-haired cat-girl pouted,
"Leon, are you mad at us? Cuz…it's all Carol's fault! She started it!"
Carol glared,
"Oh, I started it? You were the one that shut off my show when I was watching it!"
Farrah rolled her eyes,
"Oh, please! I was doing the world a favor when I shut off that crap of a show and put on a real show."
Carol shot back,
"NCIS is a great show. It has a lot of action and great plot."
Farrah looked at her arch-nemesis,
"Oh, please. All NCIS has is forty-four minutes of head-slapping."
To prove a point, the cat-like girl slapped Falcon upside the head. Hard. Falcon grumbled,
"Ow! What the hell?"
Farrah shrugged,
"Grow a pair, fly boy."
She then looked back at Carol,
"That's a show. CSI is a show that requires someone of intelligence to watch, something you clearly have NONE of since the aliens decided to experiment on your sorry ass!"
Carol snarled,
"Not all of us get the scientific stuff you do, furball."
Crystal nodded,
"Yeah. I mean, I don't like NCIS that much, but that's easier to understand than CSI!"
Leon shook his head,
"Are we really going to have this discussion again? I thought we settled this last week."
Sam shrugged,
"I like CSI: Miami, but only because of those hot girls that are on there!"
The Wakandan prince rolled his eyes,
"Somehow, I knew you would say that."
Natasha nodded,
"I like NCIS. Ziva actually can kick ass!"
Farrah folded her arms, whining,
"Leon!"
Leon shook his head, slightly flushing,
"Well, I can do a pretty good Horatio Caine impersonation."
The red-eyed hero collected his thoughts for a moment and, clearing his throat, said,
"You can go, but don't go far." (1)
He grinned,
"What do you think?"
T'challa nodded,
"Impressive."
Crisis shrugged,
"You should see me do Jack Bauer."
He cleared his throat, and said,
"Chloe, it's Jack! When's that back up supposed to be here?"
Carol nodded approvingly,
"All right, that's impressive, but I'm still surprised you watched every episode of CSI: Miami?"
Leon shrugged,
"I've watched it for a while. Personally, I think it's a great show. Nothing has given Miami a great look like that since Miami Vice."
Sam laughed,
"Now, THAT was a great show."
Carol stammered,
"But…but…what about NCIS?"
Leon swallowed at that; he had really stepped in it this time. He rubbed the back of his head,
"Well, Carol. The show is good, but…"
Carol began tapping her foot impatiently,
"Well what? I'm waiting."
Farrah grumbled,
"What Leon means is that NCIS is about as good as a frontal lobotomy."
Carol shouted,
"Shut up, hairball! I want to hear what my boyfriend has to say!"
The lioness spun around, screaming,
"WHAT DID YOU SAY? LEON'S MY MAN AND I'M NOT LETTING YOU HAVE HIM!"
With that, she tackled Carol, another cat-fight erupting.
Crystal shook her head,
"If you ask me, the new Melrose Place is the greatest."
All the boys in the room groaned at that. Crystal looked at them,
"What? I bet Quicksilver watches it."
Falcon shook his head,
"And I bet he also watches soap operas and eats chocolate bon-bons all day, too."
The Inhuman princess scowled,
"What's wrong with that?"
The avian hero shook his head quickly,
"No, nothing."
Leon shook his head, changing the subject,
"Shouldn't we try and break them up?"
Black Panther asked,
"Do you remember the last time we tried to do that?"
The red-eyed hero shuddered,
"Good point."
End of One shot!
(1): One of my favorite lines from CSI: Miami. I don't know when he said it, but I know he said that.