AN: Hola folks... yes yes I wrote ANOTHER angsty one-shot… but maybe it isn't a one shot… anyway warnings: Language, gore, sodomy, beatings, cutting, suicide. As always please R and R and let me know if you think it's crap or not cause I truly want to get better, also an IMPORTANT AN at the bottom
My personal hell
Why?
Why does everyone have to look at me with those eyes?
Why does everyone have to say those things?
What did I ever do to them?
What did I ever FUCKING do to them?!
"Scum"
"Demon"
"Beast"
They say it all while staring at me with those cold, cruel eyes
They say it and laugh as they beat me with their fists, their feet
Their bottles
There bats
Even the children beat me
Pummel me with their tiny fists and laugh
They always laugh
Laugh as I lay curled in the fetal position
Leaking blood and shit and bile
My bones broken
Bent and broken into angles no human could ever achieve
And then they spit on me
Spit and curse as they throw garbage and bottles at my dieing body
Yet no matter how much I want to give in
Just give up
Give up on hope,
On life
On EVERYTHING
Something starts to heal me
And it burns
It hurts worse then the beatings
Feeling each pulverized bone snapping, shifting, grinding back into position
Feeling my sundered skin cauterize and re-form on my broken and sobbing body
Feel as the organs, hanging on by mere threads outside my body get torn back into my body and reshape themselves into some semblance of normalcy.
I puke blood in that dirty back ally
It reeks of shit and vomit and piss
I just want to DIE but my body won't let me.
And then I hear it
Hear that damned, deep, sadistic animal growling
The demon keeps me alive
Telling me she relishes in my pain for daring to keep HER locked away
Every night she visits me
Making me relive the day's events
Night after night reliving the blades and kicks
The bats and glass that my broken body lived through that day
Some nights are worse though
Some nights she personally sees to my torture
Burning and then freezing
Being skinned alive, feeling every nerve ending burning with pain as the skin is ripped from my body.
Yet never
NEVER
Letting me die…
I scream
I scream and scream and NOBODY hears me
NOBODY cares
After all, I'm just
"Demon"
"Beast"
I don't even know my own name anymore
After the old man dies, no one feeds me
No one even TRYS to stop them
The crowd
The entire damn VILLAGE screaming
Screaming for my blood
The beatings, if possible, get worse
Soon I'm being stripped naked
Metal spikes covered in glass violate every hole that I have
It feels as if I'm being torn in half from the inside out
I bleed
I scream
I cry
And no one stops them
No one cares
That night my demon mistress finds new ways to torture me
She violates me with fire
She uses all nine tails
And I am dieing
Dieing again as I'm torn in two
As my body burns from the inside out
And then it stops
Its morning again…
I don't know how I managed to stay sane this long
I don't know how I manage to always greet each morning and plaster that damn smile on my face.
I don't know what,
Or when
Or how I finally broke
Maybe it was when the teachers decided to strip me naked and whip me with barbed wire
Or maybe, when the children were practicing with their kunai and one "accidentally" tore my eyes out.
All I know is the villager, the one kind man
The town drunk
Gave me a way out
That day, he handed me a razor and told me that
"Thissh villagesh better without a damn dymon here, yoush know whatdda do scum," and mimed pulling the blade across his wrists and throat.
That night I didn't care about the house having been broken into and having shit smeared on my walls.
That night I didn't care that my cloths had been pissed on
Or that my ratty pile of rags that I called a bed had been lit on fire
Or that the house had messages scrawled on the walls wishing for my death
I slowly drew the razor across my wrists, then up the arm, then across my throat
I felt it
I felt the pleasant floating sensation that I assumed was my poor twisted soul leaving my abused body
I started feeling light headed and everything was turning white
Then
Nothing….
AN: Ok… now that you have read it (you HAVE read it right?!) r & r as usual, flame me, praise me, hate me w/e but ALSO vote if you wanna see this one continued as one of three options 1) a two shot alternate perspective on this story (different persons point of view) 2) a nice LOOONG angst filled fic (I'll try and keep y'all entertained) or 3) a Naru/Hina angst/fluff fic…. Up to you, now GO ON… VOTE!!!