Not a Moment to Soon

Disclaimer: I don't own Card captors Sakura or any of the people mentioned below :sigh:

Summary: Sakura secretly loves her pen pal but when he ignores her for another and suddenly disappears she feels she will break beyond repair. A bit angst but ends happily.

A/N: This story wasn't originally written for any purpose and the characters looked different and went by different names but when I found this again I decided to put it up on this website. I apologize for the out of character-ness and the fact that Sakura's family is not the same as in the series but bear with me please. Also just to warn you I touch on suicide and angst so yea…but it all ends happily and that's all that matters, right? Also the ending is weak as is this whole story and I am in no way proud of it but meh…enjoy I suppose, R and R please

Ages:

Sakura and her friends – 18
Syaoran – 20-ish

Sakura placed the phone down after her brief conversation with her friend on the latest chemistry project. She raised her head till her gaze fell on her reflection in the mirror; she saw her face relax till the smile was gone. She had short auburn hair and piercing green eyes. She had pale skin although she had once possessed rosy cheeks. She had bags under her eyes from her extreme lack of sleep and her eye lids permanently drooped. She studied her appearance for five more seconds before turning around and walking to her room and collapsing on her bed searching for her out dated CD player (walkman). She turned it on, already knowing the CD she had listened to for the past fortnight was still in there. She knew that her song choice at the moment wasn't helping her mood but she couldn't imagine listening to anything up beat or cheery.

Sakura heard her parents alarm sound and immediately removed her headphones and ducked under the covers pretending to sleep.
"Sakura dear, breakfast will be ready in 20 minutes"
Sakura nodded before reluctantly rising and preparing for a quick shower. Sakura avoided the mirror as usual and did her hair up in the usual, plain pony tail before going downstairs to join the family for breakfast. Her Dad was reading the newspaper, her mother was drinking her coffee and her two younger siblings were fighting. She took her place next to her mother and began to pick at her food not possessing an appetite at this hour. She felt her mother's gaze on her and when she raised her head her mom had the same disapproving look she had at every meal lately. Sakura quickly rose and excused herself before feeding the dog her bacon.

Sakura greeted the people on her bus before sitting in the usual spot. Everyday was the same, that was modern society and anything that happened that was unexpected was rarely a good thing but rather a bad surprise, one we could do with out. Fate toyed with our lives giving us a brief glimpse of happiness only so it could be taken from us, fate laughed in our faces everyday. Sakura was brought out of her thoughts as the bus door slammed open, she sighed preparing herself for another day at school.
"Sakura!!"
Sakura raised her head from the table making sure she hadn't drooled in her brief slumber. As soon as she was able to focus she saw it was her three friends, Chiharu, Naoko and Rika.
"Oh, hey guys"
"Sakura are you alright?"
"Have you been staying up late to speak to him again?"
Sakura shook her head and decided to change the topic, not wanting to worry her friends.
"How was your weekend?"
"Oh I went out with Takashi on Sunday and he was an absolute gentleman!"
"Sakura why won't you let us set you up?"
"She probably likes that guy"
"You guys know I'm not ready to date yet, so please don't set me up or anything"
Her friend's gaze softened as she pleaded, they wanted her to be happy and she was eighteen, way past the dating age in their opinion but she refused. They weren't sure why and she never said. She was close to many boys at their school and out of, probably more than the local sluts but she refused to take it further than friendship.
"Alright Sakura have it your way but you're going to have to start sometime"
Sakura nodded and went back her dreams.

Sakura stared out the bus window trying to stop the flow of tears, although she often cried, she hated it because it made her feel weak. She saw her stop approaching and her dad waiting with her dog; she wiped the stray tears and attempted to return her breathing to normal with little success.
"Hey Sakura…Are you alright?"
Sakura nodded not trusting her voice at the moment.
"We're having Chinese for dinner tonight your favorite"
"I…I'm not hungry tonight, but thank you for the thought"
Sakura ran upstairs to her room as soon as she arrived home, she checked her email and felt the stream of tears begin again when she saw he inbox still remained empty. She crawled under her blanket and decided to just cry, too tired to hold it in. She thought about the past few weeks, remembering her friend's constant attempts at hooking her up with a boyfriend. She smiled sadly, reflecting the real reason she wouldn't accept their offers.
'I've been hurt by friends and peers so much in my past; I felt…I feel hated by everyone. I'm extremely self conscious…paranoid, how could I ever handle a relationship I'd fall apart if he ever hurt me, after watching my friend get cheated on, broken up with and betrayed so many times…I can't do it, I wouldn't be able to trust them.'
Sakura picked up the picture frame beside her bed and traced the outline of the man in the photo. It was a photo of her in Hong Kong, two years prior and she was standing next to her best friend, Syaoran. He had messy brown hair, brown eyes and was half a foot taller than her.
'Yet I find myself trusting him with everything, even my heart…no matter how many times I attempted to stop myself I fell for him, and badly…but he's not here any more'
Syaoran and Sakura had been pen pals since she was 13 and Syaoran had decided to come to Japan for his gap year which had ended just over a month ago and he had returned to Hong Kong. Sakura had discovered her feelings for him when she was 15, a year before she first met him face to face.
'You'd think after three years I'd have confessed but no I'm to much of an idiot to do something that logical'
After he'd arrived in Hong Kong he spoke of meeting up with old friends and it upset Sakura that he spoke of his old friend Meiling who he had always seemed fond of, he'd even asked advice on how to ask her out but that was before he stopped speaking to her.
Just over a fortnight ago Syaoran had ceased contact with Sakura and she felt her self becoming like her old self, the one before she met him, depressed, shy, weak and heading down the road to suicide. She hated the fact that he was her happiness, when he wasn't there she cried more, she lost more battles but when he was around she was happy and confident, but what she hated most that he was gone for good now, the one guy she was willing to risk everything for. Sakura hugged her knees and felt herself completely break apart.

Sakura gulped as she stepped up and tried not to look down knowing that if she did she'd back out of it. She was ashamed to admit she finally gave up, she was being selfish, choosing her happiness over her family and friends feelings but she couldn't help it. She watched the sun beginning to sink, she was born at sunrise, she'd die at sunset it only seemed right. She decided as soon as the sun was completely gone she'd jump. She counted down, closing her eyes and placing one foot forward.

"4…3…Ahhhh!"
Sakura tried to get out of the tight hold around her waist, someone had grabbed her and pulled her down. She felt that someone rest their head on her back and start to cry, soaking her top slightly.
"Sakura…why?!"
Sakura gasped, the voice was soft and sad but she recognized it, it belonged to Syaoran. She felt herself beginning to cry.
"I thought…you were gone…why are you here?"
"I missed you"
"Then why did you stop talking to me, why'd you carry on about Meiling?!"
"I was…"
Sakura pulled away and turned to face Syaoran and noticed the bunch of flowers in his hand, she raised her eyebrow.
"Who are they for?"
"You"
Sakura blushed but continued to look at him curiously.
"Well this wasn't how I planned it but…"
Syaoran let out a nervous chuckle before Sakura signaled for him to continue.
"Sakura, what I said about Meiling…I was trying to get you jealous…the truth is I love you and I can't stand being apart from you"
Sakura smiled and felt the flow of tears she'd jut managed to stop start again. She hugged him, shaking from her crying.
"I…I love you too"
"Really?"
"Yea, for a long time now"
Syaoran pulled away from Sakura in shock.
"How long?"
"About three or four years, how about you?"
"Since the year I met you"
Sakura's smile grew and she stood on tip toes allowing her lips to meet his.
"So I take it you'll be my girlfriend?"
Sakura glanced behind her at the ledge thinking about what could have been before leading Syaoran away.
"Yup"