A random little thing that came to me while trying to work on another story. I couldn't get the idea out of my head, so here it is now. Tell me what you think!
Detective Elliot Stabler was having a bit of a problem. For you see, Detective Elliot Stabler was tired. Not just a regular tired, like someone who spent a full day working hard and was now in need of a night's sleep. No, this was a special tired, that of an over worked detective whose captain had just told him that, after two nights working straight of work on a case, he was going to get some sleep. Now, this wasn't all bad. The Captain had told Elliot he didn't have to leave the precinct. He could just bunk in the break room for a few hours until he was rested enough to continue work with a clear mind.
The problem was that Captain Cragen had told not only Elliot, but also Olivia, Fin, and Munch that they too needed to get some rest. Which made for a slightly awkward situation when one took into account the fact that, due to an accident involving an overly tired Junior Detective and a gas lamp, the break room was lacking in its usual smattering of twin beds. Instead the room contained one large bed that had been donated by a helpful Detective's wife (a bed that, according to the laws of physics, shouldn't have been able to get through the break room door).
And this was what lead to four half conscious Detectives lying crammed together in a California King bed, all keeping stiff as they tried to not intrude on their fellows' personal space.
'This sucks,' Elliot thought to himself, straightening his legs out slightly only to pull them together again so as to not dislodge Olivia from her perch on the edge of the bed, where she lay back to back with her partner. Fin's thoughts followed along the same lines as he and Munch lay the same way as Olivia and Elliot, figuring that lying sideways might give the group a little more room.
Of course, this lead to Elliot and Fin lying face to face, both keeping eyes carefully avoided and hands tucked in close so as to avoid making the situation any more uncomfortable.
"This sucks," Munch said after the quartet had been lying together for close to twenty minutes. He could tell from how tense the muscles in Fin's back were that his younger partner felt the same way.
"Maybe if we just lay here long enough, we'll be able to convince Cragen we got some sleep," Olivia suggested half heartedly as she clung to the edge of the mattress.
"And maybe Fin will come to work tomorrow in a dress," Elliot said, feeling Olivia shake slightly with suppressed laughter at the thought, and then grinning when Fin glared at him while reaching around to swat at Munch when the older man gave his own snort of laughter.
"It's worth a shot," Fin said, rolling his eyes when Munch muttered some comment in response that Elliot and Olivia couldn't hear. "Hey, it's better than waking up with the lot of you snoring around me."
"I don't snore," Olivia said, turning to try and peer over Elliot's shoulder.
"I do," Munch said from behind Fin, who rolled his eyes again.
"Okay, that settles it," Elliot said, yawning despite of himself. "We stay awake. After a few hours we'll get up and leave, tell Cragen we slept the whole time."
"And what do we say when he asks why we still look like the living dead?" Munch asked, earning a snort from Fin.
"We lie through our teeth, and then guzzle coffee like its oxygen."
The other three Detectives considered Fin's words, and unanimously agreed that it would be their best course of action.
"Alright," Olivia said, checking her watch. "So now we wait."
"Yes. You're sure? Alright, I'll get a Detective right on it." Cragen finished scribbling down the message as he dropped the phone back into its cradle. Once done the Captain tore the paper from his note pad and stood, stepping around his desk and into the main office to find himself a Detective to pass his latest lead on to. But looking around the office, Cragen found himself lacking in something he needed to get that done. His Detectives.
"Would anyone happen to know where my Detectives are?" he asked to the few people bustling around the office. One young man, who was picking up something from a printer, waved to get the Captain's attention. Once he had it he pointed to the break room's door, and then scurried out of the room with his paper.
"Oh, right. I thought they would have been up by now," the Captain muttered. Turning to the break room, Cragen marched his way over to the door, grabbing the knob and pushing it open as he began to speak.
"Stabler, Benson, I need you…to…" Cragen trailed off, eyebrows rising and jaw dropping as he took in the sight that met him.
Sprawled across the break room's new bed were his missing Detectives, all fast asleep and, Cragen assumed, all oblivious to the positions they were in. Scrunched up on one side of the bed were the three male members of Cragen's team. Munch, who had at some point rolled over in his sleep, was now sleeping with his chest against Fin's back, an arm wrapped loosely around his partner's waist. On Fin's other side was Elliot, who was snuggled up to Fin, his face pressed against the man's chest. Covering the half of the bed the three men weren't crowded together on was Olivia, arms and legs sprawled out to take advantage of every inch of space she had available.
Now, as much as it hurt Cragen to disrupt the group's rather pleasant looking nap, Cragen needed a Detective to check on his lead (and he lacked a camera to document the moment anyway). So, with a sigh, Cragen walked the rest of the way into the room, grabbing the door and swinging it shut with a bang.
"Up and at 'um!" Cragen called as the Detectives all jumped awake at the bang. Olivia shot upright, hair sticking up at odd angles and an unfocused deer in headlights look across her face. Beside her the males in the bed also woke. It didn't take Elliot and Fin long to realize their awkward position, both men shouting at the other and pushing one another away, resulting in Elliot bumping into Olivia while Fin's shift knocked Munch off the edge of the bed and to the floor below.
After a little more shouting and confusion, the Detectives finally got themselves together enough to turn their collective focus from one another and to the man standing at the door.
"I'm glad I have your attention," Cragen said, looking over the four tousle haired, puffy eyed adults glaring at him. Olivia was sitting upright, still looking a little lost and not all with it; Elliot and Fin were propped up on their elbows, both with a hand out to hold each other back, even as they stared at their Captain; and Munch glaring up from his position on the floor.
"Can we help you?" Elliot groused, glaring unhappily at the interrupter of his nap.
"Yes," Cragen said, walking over and dropping the note at Elliot's feet and hitting Fin on the leg as the tired man collapsed back on the bed with a huff. "You've had your nap kids, now get back to work."