Music tip:
Leona Lewis - Run
youtube: watch?v=jqpAgMxhx30

Bury My Love

Two-Shot:
Run

Just run.

The air was cold and left goosebumps on his skin, as Mitch quietly excited his house in Florida to go on a run. By itself it wasn't unusual for him, he always tried to stay healthy and fit due to his athletic mother and so he went for a run in his calm and beautiful neighborhood quiet often.

The only thing not fitting in was the time though.
3 a.m. on a Saturday night.

His hands were shaking when he closed the door on his way out and when he tried to start the music on his player that he usually ran to. Somehow he must've chosen the wrong playlist, because instead of a numbing and steady beat a completely different song started, but he didn't want to change it. Not now. He just needed to finally get away from here, the house, the memories, the wishes…

And him.
Jerome.

His throat began to contract from just thinking about his best friend and Mitch began to run out of the driveway in a pace that was way too fast for him to keep up. A stupid dream, a stupid, so stupid dream had brought back the feelings in a rush he hadn't been able to escape from.

Despite all his efforts to forget and leave them behind, they had caught up with him again.
He should've known.

After all he would never get rid of the root of all evil.
How could he, when Jerome's laugh opened up his heart and lifted him high up in the sky?
How could he, when his caring words made his chest explode with hope that maybe, maybe…?
How could he, when the soft look in his eyes full of love made him glow and break at the same time, because he never was the reason for it?

Just run.

Mitch fell into a steady rhythm, as the next song began.
When he had woken up from a dream, which had turned into a nightmare, he hadn't hesitated to throw on his sport clothes and his hoodie. It had been the same dream, the one he hadn't had for several weeks, but it was still exactly the same he had so many times before.

At first he always was together with Jerome. Mitch never remembered where exactly they were, but it was more memorable that Jerome was holding his hands every single time.
The soft look in his eyes? For him only.
The smile? Dedicated to him.
The sweet kiss, innocent and full of passion at the same time? Indescribable.

And then it always took a turn, Jerome disappeared and a knife was stabbed through his heart, when he had a vision of what could be.
In front of him, further away now, appeared an older version of Jerome. He held her in his arms with a ring on his hand that lay on her growing stomach. Married and about to be a father, who loved her more than anything else in the world.

It had been Alanna. Always. Then they had broken up and Jerome had been so incredibly happy a few weeks later. He had been practically glowing when he had said to Mitch he wanted to tell him something important…
Mitch had allowed himself to hope, just a little bit, because Jerome had been so happy without her being there. Maybe things could work out. Hope was something good and he had been excited to finally talk to his best friend about it, he had been willing to confess everything and then-
Louise and Jerome had gotten back together.

He had been so cheerful.
Because of her. Not him. Never him.

Mitch had tried to get rid of the feelings. He for sure was just an overprotective best friend, who didn't want to lose Jerome – reasonable, normal, something everyone would understand, right?
Of course it hadn't worked out and the dreams had returned.

Just run!

Some parts of the walkway were completely dark due to missing street lamps, but Mitch enjoyed being invisible for some moments. No one could see him thinking and having a mental break down about things that were unreachable for him.

Unreachable.
He should admit it to himself, shouldn't he?

Jerome would never have feelings for him, not those that stole your breath and could ruin you in the blink of an eye. There would never be more than friendship and some simple hugs, instead of desired kisses and confessions and simply… love.

Mitch didn't remember when exactly he had realized that he actually loved his best friend.
Did it happen when they had streamed on Twitch a few months ago? Or had it rather been the moment in which they had decided to move in together?

Just run… escape for a moment.

The next song began and Mitch finally figured out what had happened to his music.
It was one of Jerome's playlists he had put on his phone for Mitch to listen to.

"So you know I'm always with you," he had said in their small hotel room in London last year. "I know, it's cheesy. Just…" Jerome hadn't finished his sentence back then, because he had blushed an adorable shade of red and avoided his eyes. They had been sitting on the large bed they had to share, so Mitch had just chuckled and hugged him.
And then things had changed. That must've been the beginning of the end. Jerome had started to talk about their friendship and how important Mitch was for him, like a brother, who always was by his side, no matter what…

His heartbeat had increased, when Jerome hadn't backed away from the long hug.
It had been hard to breathe, because his scent had never been this intense and capturing before.
Then the fluttering feeling in his chest had flared up, completely unexpected, and it had never left him ever since. It was a curse, a nightmare and the most beautiful feeling in the world.
Love.

Stop!

Mitch's heart was pounding painfully in his chest and his legs nearly gave out, as he stopped at the boundary wall of one of their neighbors' houses and leaned against it. He was gasping for air and ripped his headphones out, because the song was too painful to listen to. "Shut up," he whispered to no one in particular, because he was still all alone. "Just shut up," he breathed and then slid down the wall, when his lower lip began to tremble.

Not once had he allowed himself to cry over Jerome.
He had tried to tell himself again and again that love was something beautiful, no matter if the other person felt the same way or not. But to see him together with Louise again, to hear him rave about how she was the perfect one, the one he could actually imagine to marry one day-

"Stop, stop thinking about it, please!"
His voice was barely audible, as the tears appeared in his brown eyes and spilled faster than he could brush them away. "Why can't you fucking stop thinking about him for just a second?!" he sobbed, buried his wet face in his arms and clutched his hoodie with his shaking hands to hold on to something.

Love.
It hurt endlessly, the pain was overwhelming and ripped his chest open, because he wasn't able to bury the feelings inside of him any longer. Didn't he see?! Jerome was his best friend and supposed to know, when Mitch's world fell apart and when he couldn't go on, wasn't he? Jerome had always been aware of how he felt, even when Mitch had tried to hide his thoughts and feelings about the fight with Adam and the mess with Team Crafted. Jerome had known and been by his side to comfort him without a single word.

So when did it stop?
When had they stopped being there for each other and when had it started to be Mitch running after Jerome like a desperate fool?

-they had stopped being best friends. The realization hit him hard and the sobs intensified, as he tried to deny the obvious fact that they weren't as close as before Mitch had foolishly fallen in love with Jerome. But even the fans noticed, didn't they? Various comments, the lack of videos together, because Jerome was together with Louise all the time, enjoying her presence and his life back in New York.

Had it been the right decision to move in together in Florida?
It had been back then, as they just were best friends and nothing more.

Now it seemed to have done more harm than good.
Mitch was a broken and crying mess, his usual optimistic self was buried under the heartache, the pain and the longing for the confident American by his side. And Jerome self? He had moved on and grown up in a direction Mitch couldn't follow.

The painful pressure on his heart and the feeling to suffocate didn't disappear, but the tears finally began to subside because he had no energy left to cry his heart out. People always said that it was relieving to let the tension out and just allow the tears, but Mitch felt even worse than before. The only thing that had actually disappeared was the desire to just run far, far away from Jerome and everything burdening him.

Now he just wanted to really be invisible, to curl up and let Jerome go.
It would help him to move on, wouldn't it?

…who was he kidding? Of course he would never be able to, because this was not about a random person – it was about Jerome. He needed him by his side, now more than ever before. As a lover, yes, even though as a best friend would be enough as well for now. Jerome would listen to him, he would be silent together with Mitch and he would comfort him until the tears had subsided.

But he wasn't here.
Instead Mitch sat at the side of a road at 3.30 a.m., while crying about a hopeless love and the loss of his best friend. They had been friends for so long and now everything was over.

…wasn't it?
They've known each other since 4th grade.
Should he really throw everything they had away? Maybe Jerome needed to be reminded of what they had and what their close friendship had been about. Maybe he didn't even realize that they were drifting apart.
Maybe Mitch should be honest with him.

It took him a while, but Mitch managed to raise himself up from the pavement. Step by step he began to walk back the way he had come from, slowly and uncertain, but not once did he stop again. Not even when the sky opened up above him and drenched him in cold rain. He began to pick up his pace, faster and faster, until he was running with a steady rhythm again.

And then the thoughts and especially the doubts returned to his exhausted mind.

So he was going to confess to Jerome?
Was it even worth it? It for sure would only make things worse, so what was he trying to achieve with it? To make Jerome feel guilty for being himself and loving Louise? He was happy with her, so Mitch shouldn't even think about breaking them up. Not that it would work to begin with. Jerome wasn't in love with Mitch and would never be.

All the talk about Merome made Mitch hope that maybe, maybe it could work out for them and that he was mistaken about Jerome's feelings. What about those little moments the fans were able to catch? They had to mean something, because maybe, maybe things could work out, no matter if there was someone else involved or not.

Despite the tears streaming down his face again and mixing with the raindrops, Mitch had to laugh. It was dry and without any humor. Jerome had been his best friend for a long time, Mitch knew him better than anybody else. He wasn't in love with Mitch and would never be.

He couldn't tell Jerome the truth.
If he did, he would destroy all he had left.

He passed the gate to his house and kept running in the opposite direction through the drenching rain.

Just run.

Due to the darkness and the heavy rain Mitch wasn't able to see the figure standing in front of one of the windows upstairs, watching him with a worried and pained expression on his face.

Run.