Like a Moth to a Flame

by ladihawk

An interpretation of how Vegeta might have struggled with his feelings when possessed by Babidi during the World MA Tournament, up to his sacrifice to protect Earth from Majin Buu, in his perspective. First he recalls his life up until this point, hints at how it might have changed him a little, & returns his thoughts to the present, taking on Goku & then Majin Buu. One-Shot.

Author's Note - This is my first DB Fanfiction. It's been a while since I've done any writing, so forgive me if something seems a little jumbled or off.

My husband mentioned something about being curious what a fanfiction would be like about Vegeta's thoughts leading up to his sacrifice in the Majin Buu Saga, so with a little of his help here and there, we came up with this. It is all from Vegeta's direct perspective, and I did my best to try and keep him in character as well as I could. This is my interpretation of his thought process beyond what canon shows. It's open to interpretation, but I hope that someone enjoys it. I find Vegeta to be a very fascinating character with some immense character development throughout the DB series. This was fun to write.

Disclaimer- Dragonball characters and saga do not belong to me. I think I'd probably be a little more rich by now if they did.

**Flashback**

I've always been drawn to power like a moth drawn to a flame, ever since I was a boy. Perhaps it was because I was never given a choice to be drawn to anything else during my youth. Trials and hardships have their own twisted ways of morphing into much more, hatred, deceit, anger….it takes many forms, some all at the same time, and sometimes never all at once, but separate in their own regard. I am the Prince of all Saiyans, I was born to be the pride of my race, to become a strong and worthy king, to fulfill my destiny of becoming the Super Saiyan of Legend. Tch, Prince of a race that fell at the hands of a tyrannical monster, my planet was destroyed, taking nearly every single Saiyan soul remaining. Talk about a fucking blow.

Oh, but first, I watched as my father, the Saiyan King Vegeta, my namesake, was utterly humiliated at the slimy hands of that purple bastard Frieza. I was only a young child at the time. I then spent the better part of my childhood and young adult life purging planets and working the Planet Trade Organization, under Frieza as his little "monkey", as he liked to call me. I was a brutal warrior, trained to kill, trained to eliminate threats and neutralize opponents. That was my job. We succeeded at our tasks, Frieza was happy and we lived to see another day. I spent the better part of my life thus far cruising the galaxy taking thousands of lives, hell, probably more than that, to turn planets for a profit. I learned to fight, and I learned to fight well. It is in my blood. It is what I do. I don't shy away from fights and I sure as hell don't turn down the opportunity to get stronger.

Then Namek happened. And things changed, a little. I met Kakarot for the first time. Raditz' younger brother. A lower class Saiyan, but he had figured out the Super Saiyan Transformation. You. Have. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Me. That third class dog beat me to it, beat me to my birthright. At that point, I vowed I would destroy him. But, with Namek's destruction, so too was Goku destroyed. Shenron couldn't bring him back, not this time. But….we all knew he'd be back. Somehow. He never gave up that easily. Someday I would avenge my pride and avenge my right. Someday. You better believe it.

And, damn, that blue haired harpy that kept running her stupid mouth and who had the audacity to call me cute; it all went downhill from offered for me to come live on the planet Earth, where Kakarot lived with his family as well. She offered me residence at her home in a place called Capsule Corporation. She was the heiress of her father's multi-million dollar company, and a hot headed, prideful, and stubborn earthling, and I will fully admit I thoroughly enjoyed verbally sparring with her and ordering her around. Nothing was quite as satisfying as watching her stomp around, enraged and red as a disgusting flavored earth fruit called a tomato, after I demanded something from her. Payback is a bitch, she was the one that put me in a pink shirt that said Badman, and thought I'd just let it slide? HA! Beyond that, our living arrangement was beneficial in the fact that the woman was a literal genius in damn near everything she did, and same with her father. They had constructed some device, a room capable of simulating different gravity levels, much like many other planets I had been on in the past. Perfect for training to catch up to that dog Kakarot and claim the Super Saiyan transformation for myself.

Until I blew it up. Pushed my limits a little too hard. I knocked myself out damn near cold for at least a day or two and landed myself in the Capsule Corp infirmary, hooked up to who knows what sort of human rifraff medical crap and bandaged to the hilt. Thankfully my Saiyan genes drastically speed up the healing process, so I could get back at it in no time, and I didn't give a crap what the woman said. But… it was then I noticed that the woman seemed to be a little more than interested in me, and I let my needs get the best of me. We had our moment, and although she was a fascinating creature and quite attractive, she was a damned distraction and I couldn't have it. There was no way I'd ever achieve the transformation if she kept alluring me with her looks and superior abilities in the bedroom, well, for a human, that is. So back to space I went.

I needed that transformation for me. But I also needed it if we wanted to beat those Androids that strange purple haired teen warned us about. He seemed strangely familiar at the time, but I just couldn't place it. I worked and worked for it, and eventually it happened in a fit of rage. I finally had what I had been waiting for, and it felt like nothing I'd ever felt before. Raw power in its fullest. At that point, I kept training to hone my abilities, and eventually set a course back to Earth, to return to defeat the Androids.

I was not ready for what I found when I arrived back on Earth.

The blue haired earth woman had birthed me an heir. A half blood Saiyan heir. Part of me just wanted to pack that space ship right back up and take off again, but…Androids. I didn't know how to be a father. At that point, I didn't WANT to be a father. All I'd wanted was a romp in the sheets with a pretty lady and to call it good right there. But this boy…Trunks, well, come to find out, he was that purple haired teen that warned us about the Androids, he traveled to our time from the future and a different timeline. In a way, it was at least somewhat comforting to know that his ki was strong, and he was partially of my blood. But still, me…a father? I just couldn't figure it out.

The whole Android thing though, let's just not talk about that. Mistakes were made. At least on my part. I let the woman and her infant son down, but then again, it was her fault for putting herself in danger. If it wasn't for the older version of Trunks, they would have died. But, for a moment, there was a brief part of me that felt something. Felt something that I'm not sure I felt before. Was it fear? Fear of losing them? I'm not really sure. It may have been my first moments of feeling anything like that in my life. I pushed it away and we moved on.

And then there was Cell. At that point, Kakarot was back and we had come to some sort of agreement that I wasn't going to pummel his face into the ground. For this fight, we needed all of us. Sometimes I wonder if my life is destined to be full of failures and setbacks, despite my pride and determination. For this fight, we needed all of us. Either way, I think another part of me changed ever so slightly when I watched my teen son from the future get struck down by that green…thing.I felt…something like rage, and I launched a counterattack on Cell that essentially ended with me utterly humiliated in front of the z fighters in an attempt to avenge my son.

Kakarot sacrificed himself in an attempt to defeat him, but it just wasn't enough and that blob regenerated itself and came back to earth, but to add insult on top of injury in my case, Kakarot's brat Gohan was the one who exhibited a literally stupid amount of power and eventually annihilated Cell. Thanks to Shenron, the older Trunks was revived, and eventually able to return to his own timeline in the future.

And that's just the fighting side of my life thus far, because most of my life has only ever been fighting. But after Cell, things settled down a little, and…I guess you could say I've grown somewhat fond of living on Earth. There's something to be said about having a place to go when you're battle weary, and a pillow to lay your head on, with the warmth of another being beside you. Tch, I haven't grown soft. No, I've just learned to appreciate the finer things in life. Especially the food. Oh, the food. For a Saiyan, food is almost as much life as fighting is life. And you better believe that Earth's food is well worth not destroying the mudball. Because really, you can't do Friday night without pizza, or sneak the woman's last instant ramen bowl when you know she's not looking. Really, it's the finer things in life. Training after a bowl of ramen is just that much better.

In an oddly satisfying way, it has been relatively fascinating to watch my own brat grow. I never thought I'd live long enough to find a woman, let alone procreate. And yet, here I am. Earth culture is such a far cry from Saiyan culture. Adjusting to the oddities here has been, well, an adjustment. A little screaming here, a little demanding there, and I think the woman and I have come to an understanding. Somehow she convinced me to take part in the earth culture of "marriage", which I eventually discovered is much like the Saiyan ritual of bonding and taking a mate. So, alas, I stand before you a married man with a child. With a family. A word that has been so foreign to me my whole life. Family. My, my, things most certainly have changed. Not the turn of events I had expected by any means. There is definitely a fondness for that blue haired beauty, Bulma is her name, I don't use it much, it's mostly easier to just call her woman and I admit that I still take much pleasure in getting a rise out of her, even though we are married. No, I wouldn't say that I've grown soft. I've just found things I can appreciate a little.

**End Flashback**

**Current Time - World Martial Arts Tournament and Beyond**

I'm standing here, so many thoughts running through my head. Another day, another enemy it seems. Supreme Kai showed up during the World Martial Arts Tournament to tell us that Babidi was planning to bring back some creature called Majin Buu, rumored to be the powerful being in the universe. It seems like the rest of the people around me are squabbling like hens in a henhouse for a chance at meager rations, over who gets to fight who, when all I want right now is to fight Kakarot. But, on the other hand, the more I hear about this Babidi, the more interested I am. The Z-Fighters, Kakarot and I went in search of Babidi's ship, eventually locating it.

Apparently, 3 of us need to defeat 3 of Babidi's henchman to get to him, according to some odd looking creature named Pui Pui, and that he is first on the list.

A moment later, after a stupid earth game of rock paper scissors of who gets to fight first, I'm engaged in battle with him, and suddenly Babidi transports the both of us to Pui Pui's home planet, as it has 10 times the gravity that earth does. Oh, ignorant choice, had he known the conditions I was used to training under. Needless to say, it doesn't take much and I'm able to squash him like a little bug beneath a training sneaker. It's laughable, really. Was he so naïve that he thought the Prince of all Saiyans could be reduced to rubble my a mere….whatever that was? Tch, what a joke.

Soon, I'm teleported back to Babidi's ship. Apparently Kakarot had his own battle with one of Babidi's henchman. Hn, that was supposed to be my fight with Kakarot. Next up is Gohan against some being named Dabura…the brat has gone rusty, there's no way he can beat him. I try to tell Kakarot, who told me to just fight Dabura myself and somehow we ended up at an impasse when I informed him that I was here to fight him, and no one else. Surprise, not really. In a bit of a twist, Dabura calls off his match against Gohan, and he and Babidi take off.

All of a sudden, I can feel this unyielding need to beat Kakarot. It just isn't an option anymore. I've been second to him for far too long. That Saiyan trash needed to be taken out ages ago. I am so tired of him besting me in everything. My pride has taken one too many hits, not anymore. I am the Prince of all Saiyans, I don't deserve to be second to a third class whelp. It is literally infuriating, the anger I'm feeling toward Kakarot right now.

So in that moment, I decided to sell my soul to Babidi, allowing him to take possession of me. Something about me, when I observe others fighting, I watch them closely. Watching some of the fighters in the tournament exhibit stupid amounts of power made something painfully obvious to me after fighting Pui Pui today, and watching Gohan attempt to fight Dabura. It appears that Babidi's magic, used as a form of possession, is an extreme power boost. One that I'm pretty damn sure I want to get my hands on. Who gives a fuck if it's evil? I've been evil the vast majority of my life, so why worry about that now? If it gives me the boost I need to plaster Kakarot's face into the floor of the tournament stage like the loser he is, you bet I want it. It's that whole moth to a flame thing. I could have forced him from my mind and body when he tried to enter, no doubt, it would not have been easy, but I could have done it. Instead, I gave in, knowing the power it could give me.

And damn, does it feel good.

I was going to get my chance to fight Kakarot. Finally. For real.

Ah yes, but first, mouth off to me, circus clown. See where that gets you. My anger fuels me to take out half the stadium as we face off on the tournament stage. Kakarot is clearly not amused, but requests that Babidi transport us somewhere away from people so that we can actually fight. Supreme Kai thinks he can stop us by stepping in, saying that Kakarot would have to go through him if he really wanted to fight me because our meaningless squabble needs to stop. And for a moment, I thought he actually might. But in the end, Babidi transports us elsewhere to continue.

Suddenly, Babidi is in my head, telling me to kill Supreme Kai myself. The internal struggle I feel at that point is something new, as I fall on my knees, fighting the possession in my mind and in my body, the possession that is literally tearing at every fiber of my being. Babidi seems stunned and rather furious as I tell him no, that his business with Supreme Kai is his, and his alone. I will not kill him, it is not what I am here for. My willpower is stronger than his possession, a testament to my own power within myself.

Babidi fumes for a few moments and everyone else seems surprised that I didn't break to his bidding. They assume that I'm some weak excuse of a Saiyan possessed by some psychotic slave driver. No, that would be too cliché. I am Vegeta, Prince of all Saiyans. I don't break so easily.

Everyone else takes off, knowing that our inevitable battle is not going to be non-Super Saiyan friendly. Can't play with the big boys, run home to mommy. It's probably better off that way, so they don't have to see their precious Kakarot get humiliated by his superior.

But, alas, things never seem to go quite as I plan them. I'm not exactly sure where I went wrong this time around, I was really thinking I had the upper hand in our fight as I pummeled Kakarot and eventually pinned him against a rock face using my energy as restraints. I scream at him, unleashing feelings I've withheld for many years, 'It is time to take back what is mine. I will not live my life as your second…that time is over. Every breath you take is an assault on my honor. But no more, Kakarot. By my hands, you will be cut down inch by inch…THE WAY YOU HAVE CUT DOWN MY PRIDE!"I am sorely mistaken as he breaks free, tearing chunks of rock out and immediately smashing me with them. First pride hit in this battle, taken. We keep fighting, back and forth, and conversing back and forth about who knows what. He keeps trying to convince me that this isn't the real me. That I don't really want to do this. But what does he know? He hasn't lived my life. He doesn't know about me. Shut up, Kakarot. You enfuriate me beyond words.

The fighting continues, and we of course are not making any headway beyond establishing the fact that, indeed, Kakarot is the stronger fighter. It literally kills me somewhere inside to admit that, but it just means that I have to do more to surpass him and kick his ass. I'm not sure how he manages it, but he talks me down from fighting him. I blame it on the fact that I want to fight him in top shape, and that he's too distracted by Majin Boo's rising power across the desert. At some point he says something about having a reason to fight. To stand for something, friends, family. I'm not sure if that's why I end up stopping, or if it was something else. When Kakarot said that Buu would destroy everything we know, he had to mention Bulma and Trunks. I quickly stomp out his words by vehemently saying that wasn't any of my concern, but deep down, I'm not sure what the feeling is that is suddenly rising up in my chest. It isn't pride. I know pride. It isn't anger. I know anger. This was….different. I can't describe it, because it is not something I'm familiar with. I quickly try to push it back down and ignore it. The earth woman likes to throw around the word love sometimes, says it's when you feel like you care about something or someone, enough to care for them and protect them. The word gives me the shivers, and I'm not sure whether it's good or bad. It's not one I've ever used and it's not one I probably will use. But is it the closest to describe the way I'm feeling? I don't know. Maybe. Probably not, because I really don't like that word.

At this point, my emotions are so jumbled, and I really don't like that feeling. But, I agree to fight Majin Buu with Kakarot to protect Earth from imminent destruction. Sounds familiar, hn? Again, I ponder where I went wrong in my original plan to annihilate Kakarot like the worthless folly he is, and now, here I am, having been worked over by his words like some piece of molded clay or something stupid. Tch. What a joke. Maybe I really have gone soft. No, I'm not soft. I just can't let him take all the glory on this one. He wants us to fight together. Not this time, Kakarot. You're so easily distracted, you and your senzu beans. I step in and knock him out, quickly. My pride briefly swells for a moment, but I made an agreement. I leave Kakarot, as I hone in on Majin Buu's energy signal and make my way to him.

This is my turn. My turn to fight. I don't know why Kakarot always weighs on me so much, but I always find myself thinking of him. Thinking of why I can never be as good as he is. Why he is always the one who succeeds while I often fail, and fail miserably at that. You'd think as the Saiyan Prince, I'd be more apt to succeed. But no. Kakarot beat me to Super Saiyan. He was more than willing to lay down his life for his friends and family to remove Cell as a threat to Earth. He is always the one everyone looks to in times of need. Why not me? I feel like I have spent my entire life as second best. Second best in every single thing that I have done. Now, this is my moment. I refuse to let anyone take it from me. I will show Majin Buu who the superior being is, and that goes for Babidi too. His possession failed, that should be proof enough that I am a worthy enough power in this universe. He was no match for me, and I refuse to let Buu be any match for me either. I am Saiyan, and I firmly believe that Saiyan directly translates to stubborn till the end. I won't be here once this is all said and done, but at least everyone, including Kakarot, will be safe. This is the choice I have made.

I step forward to fight Majin Buu, and we go head to head. Buu is an imbecile, but he's the strongest foe I've faced so far. Even so than Kakarot. It is an ultimate test of my willpower, and my strength. And perhaps my resolve, because Buu is a disgustingly odd, ridiculously strange creature. We've parried attacks back and forth, bringing each other seemingly to our ends, but not before we take a step further and keep fighting. For a brief moment, Buu gets the upper hand when he rips some part of himself off in some oddly grotesque fashion, and then somehow manages to wrap me up in it. No, no no, this can't be happening. Why do I always fail? As I lay there wrapped up, Buu poises himself to slam me. The pain is agonizing as he crushes down on my body. At some point, I black out from the pain, my last thought falling on how much of a failure I had truly become.

At some point later, I imagine not long, I awake to the voices of Trunks and Goten.

At that moment, something stirs in me when I see my son. Not my brat, I correct myself, but my son. I realized that in all the years he has been alive, I have not once shown him any affection. None. I have never condoned coddling him, like the woman seems to do, because I am confident it will make him soft. However, something in me at this very moment tells me that I need to show him that I care. He may be half human and half Saiyan, but that doesn't stop me from being proud of him. I've made a decision now that I know will make it so that I likely will never have the chance to tell him, so it's now or never. I call him over to me, and at first he's confused, understandably so. I pull him in for a one armed hug, and another pang of that strange feeling rises in my chest. This time, I don't push it back down. I tell him, "Trunks, you are my only son, and yet I haven't held you once since you were a baby, have I? There's something you must know, you've made me proud, my son." And my heart really does swell with pride for my boy. Because, after all, pride is something I know, and I know well. Why shouldn't I have some pride in my son? Because of him, I am not a failure.

He steps back, not sure what to say or do. As much as I don't want to, I quickly, but safely knock him out. He cannot be awake or here for what I do next. It isn't fair, to him, or to me. I don't want him to see. Goten starts screaming at me, telling me I'm a bad father, in some sort of random words. Part of me wants to scream at him, and tell him to look at his own father. Has he been any better? I don't think either one of us is anywhere near the front of the line for the father of the year award. I step to quickly and safely knock him out as well. Unfortunately it seems to anger a few others around, but they'll be thanking me here soon enough, if all goes the way I intend it to. This time, I can't fuck it up. I just can't.

That weird green Namekian approaches me. He seems to know what I intend to do. I tell him to take the boys to safety, that he must hurry. But first, I wanted to know… I asked him if he thought I might find the clown in the otherworld. As such, I should have expected his response. Kakarot was afforded the chance to stay within his body and stay with King Kai after he died. For me, I won't be so lucky.

So fucking be it.

I've made up my mind, and I already pretty much knew what the result would be when I first hatched this hairbrained idea. But if it means Earth stays safe and my wife and son can live a happy (cringe) life, then so be it.

I'm going to hold my head high. I am the Prince of all Saiyans, my pride is my honor. Like a moth to a flame, the power drew me in. And that power filled flame will snuff me out. There is nothing I can do to stop it.

The pink, childish tub of lard bounces and lumbers his way toward me, and I, me being me, can't help myself and have to throw some below the belt insults at him. After all, he is pretty ridiculous looking. Like a piece of bubblegum or an over inflated balloon that someone discarded, that sprouted legs. Oh, hell, let's get this over with. Buu threatens me and challenges me to another fight, and it becomes the beginning of the end.

I say to myself….Trunks, Bulma, I do this for you. And even you, Kakarot.

And that's when I start pushing a terrifying amount of energy out of myself. The power from Babidi makes this possible, but it is not something I will walk away from. I can feel the energy grow, but my body begins to break as it turns into a literal and existential bomb. So many feelings flowing through my mind. Memories. Thoughts. Conversations. Ten years ago I would never have dreamed of doing something like this. It was my life I cared about then. No one else's. But now….but now, here I stand, about to give up my life for those who I could, dare I say it, call my family. And, perhaps, my friends? I don't know that I'd go so far as to call them friends, but they certainly weren't enemies. Because you better bet I wouldn't be doing this for my enemies. This hurts. It hurts like hell, but at least I know Bulma and Trunks will be able to go on with their lives. In that regard, it makes it worth it. So if this is what you call love, then I guess it is. My thoughts slow as the power grows so immense that I can't focus any longer.

I pass the point of being able to feel, as the brightness surrounds me, the light of power overtaking me. The moth becoming the flame that will snuff it out, in exchange for the earth and the lives within it. And as quickly as it began, it is over. My sacrifice.