Authors Notes: Okay here's something close to your typical Chase angst fic. It takes place two months after the episode The Mistake, although please be aware that it has no correlation to whatever episode would actually be happening then. I am not totally sure what will happen in the end so please review. Your feedback is wanted, and in my case probably needed. Hope you like.

Disclaimer: I don't own House or any of the characters.

Chapter 1: Off to Australia

Chase sat at the polished mahogany table, his hair wet with saltwater was matted down to his face. His friends were crowded around him, flashing friendly smiles towards him. At the other end of the table stood his mom and dad, smiling at each other, smiling at their beautiful son. His mom was holding a camera, "Click," she snapped a picture of Chase and his friends laughing.

Then his dad walked towards the piano, and his mom walked to the wall and dimmed the lights then she stepped into the kitchen and appeared again carrying a cake. His dad started to play on the piano everyone began to sing, they sang "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Robert, happy birthday to you."

Chase smiled at this sight; his friends, his family all singing to him. The song finished his mother set the cake on the table and walked over to her son. She cupped his chin in her hands; she whispered to him, "Happy birthday sweetheart, I'm so proud of you." Chase smiled at his beautiful mother; he kissed her on the cheek. Chase's dad came to him next he looked his son straight in the eyes; Chase stood up to meet his fathers glare. Rowan Chase pulled his son close to his chest and gave him a long powerful hug. Chase wrapped his arms around his father as his father spoke to him. "Happy birthday Robert, look at you, you're growing up so fast. Yesterday it was diapers and now you're ten years old. I love you son, I love you." Chase slowly stepped away from his father, "I love you too dad, I love you too," he said.

Soon all of Chase's friend had left and Chase was sitting on the couch with his parents. They were sitting there just talking to each other. Chase was telling his parents about the day he had, had surfing with his friends. When he told them about how one wave had caught him off balance and he had fell into the water Chase's mom gave a gently laugh and his dad gave him an "it's okay," pat on the back.

Chase soon bid his parents good-night and headed off to his room. He sat on his bed and looked out his window at the beautiful garden he, his mom, and his dad had worked on all summer long. The moon was shining casting a majestic light on the ground. It was hypnotizing to the young Robert Chase, his eyes began to droop and suddenly the entire rest of his life seemed to flash before his eyes. His peaceful dream was becoming a nightmare.

Chase saw himself yelling at his father the day he came home from school to find his dad's stuff packed and his dad all ready to leave. Chase saw himself calling his father a bastard, a sinner, a man of hatred unworthy of being a father. Then Chase saw himself yelling at his father at a place he recognized as Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Chase saw himself push his father away, he saw himself ignore the gentle apologetic look in his fathers eyes.

Then Chase saw himself yelling at his mother calling her a drunk. He saw himself pushing his weak mother to the ground telling her it was her choice to drink herself to death, it was her choice but it had nothing to do with him. He saw himself tell her mother that she was helpless and that it was not his responsibility to care for her. Chase saw himself telling his mother that he was going out to live his life, and if she wanted to drink herself to death it was fine with him. Chase saw himself slam the door in his mother's face and leave.

Then everything started to swirl into blackness and Chase saw himself sitting on the couch with his mother and father, he saw himself laughing with them. He saw his mother's sweet smile and his father's gentle eyes.

Chase's stomach suddenly lurched with guilt and he awoke in his bed with a start. He felt like puking so he ran into his bathroom but nothing happened. He got himself a glass of water from the sink and took slow sips trying to calm down.

He flipped on a light switch and sat on his bed. He rubbed his head wearily as fatigue overcame him. He had been having a similar dream every night for the past two months; the dreams had started when his father died. Each night he had been awaken with images of himself doing these horrid things to his parents, but tonight was the first night that this dream made Chase feel like this.

Chase hated himself, Chase hated himself so much for all of the mean things he had done and said to his parents. He closed his eyes and pictured himself sitting on the couch with his loving parents, he heard their words his mother, "I'm so proud of you," his father, "I love you."

Chase's stomach lurched again as he realized he had never returned this love to his parents, he had yelled at them, and screamed, and pushed them away. And now they were both dead.

Chase's heart seemed to tear apart in pain greater then he had ever imagined and he began to cry. He was awful, he was the unloving bastard, and he was unworthy of being a son. He had to go and apologize to his parents or he would feel like this forever and he knew it.

The bleary-eyed Chase stumbled over to his closet, pulled out a suitcase and began to pile things into it. He looked over at his clock; 6:54, he would have just enough time to make the phone call which he needed to make and get to work.

When Chase stepped into the office, half an hour late because the phone call had taken longer then expected, Foreman, Cameron, and even House were waiting for him with worried yet determined looks on their faces. Chase groaned and rubbed his head not wanting to explain to them.

Cameron first, then Foreman, followed by House and even Cuddy and Wilson had started to worry greatly about Chase ever since his father died. Chase had not taken his father's death too well and everyone had noticed how huge bags had started to form under the young intensivist's eyes, and how he began to seem so exhausted and distraught all of the time. This had caused them all to worry and they had been giving Chase an especially hard time lately. And as Chase stepped into the office late, incredibly tired looking and preoccupied he knew that a round of questions from Cameron, House, and Foreman was waiting.

Not at all wanting to be questioned, but not wanting to talk Chase just groaned and slumped into his chair when he got into the office. To his delight though neither House nor Foreman were in the room. Only Cameron, who immediately approached Chase with a concerned look on her face, "What's wrong?" she questioned.

"I'm just tired," was Chase's muffled reply.

"I can see you're tired," said Cameron, "but there is something else wrong, I can tell," she said gently.

"There's nothing else," Chase protested half-heartedly knowing very well himself that that was not the truth.

"Chase," Cameron pleaded, "you have to tell me, before it takes you over. I want to help you….."

"You can't help me," Chase interrupted. "Only I can help me. I have to talk to my parents, we have to help each other," Chase stopped suddenly realizing that he had opened up to Cameron.

"Chase," Cameron was wide-eyed.

Chase began to speak, "For the past two months I have been having these… dreams, about my parents and I. I keep on seeing myself… I see all of the bad things I did to them I… But my parents are not mean, they loved me… th… They… they love me," Chase corrected himself. "I did not return that love and now I feel terrible I…..I cannot live with myself if I don't return that love to them. I have to go apologize to them; I have to tell them that I'm sorry."

Chase continued to speak finally taking his eyes off of the floor and looking at Cameron, "I have to talk to them in person so I will leave for Australia tomorrow… Morning," Chase said hesitantly remembering all of the details he had worked out with the travel agent over the phone that morning. "I will come back a week later, I have to do this," he strongly. He got up and headed towards the door of the office, "I am going to go home and finish packing I will come back when I'm done," he said.

Just as Chase was leaving Cameron spoke, "Chase, I'm so sorry, I never………"

"I have to do this," Chase said to her. "You can't help me anymore. But talking to you helped a lot," Chase added, "thank you."

Cameron nodded, trying to hold back her emotions, as Chase exited the office.

When Chase arrived back at work two hours later he entered the office where he found Cameron, House and Foreman.

"Chase, a minute," House said as soon as he saw him.

Chase groaned as he took off his coat and hung it up, and then he followed House out into the hallway.

"Well," said House, "Cameron told me everything." Chase closed his eyes and put his hand over his forehead.

"Just go home and get some rest before your plane ride tomorrow," House finished.

Chase looked up at him in surprise, "umm, okay," he said.

Chase went back into the office to get his coat and as he turned around to put it on Cameron looked up from the papers she was reading. Chase looked at her and mouthed, "thank you." Cameron smiled at him. Before Chase left the office, he gave Cameron a smile back.

Authors Notes: Don't think this is a setup for Chase Cameron because it's not, if know one thing about this fic it is that there will be no Chase Cameron what so ever. Also Chase Cameron would be very difficult considering Chase will be in Australia :) he-he

Oh and don't expect other chapter to be this long because they probably won't be, I tend to write short chapters I don't know what got into me.

Now review……..