More Than You Think I Am

I hope y'all don't mind reading a one-shot I wrote from 12:30 to 1:30 a.m. :D

This actually turned out pretty good, thank God.

Backstory: I found this new song that I am absolutely in love with. I listened to it over and over again, and somewhere along the line, I decided to write a song-fic about it. I think this story will relate to a lot of people - at least, I hope it will. This is a Christian story...it's about time I had one of those :) I had an experience like this in February, as some of you may know. I know I'm not alone...none of us are.

I hope you enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ninjago or the song used in this story (of course).

The song is More Than You Think I Am by Danny Gokey. I highly recommend listening to it...it's seriously one of the best songs ever, in my opinion :)

...

Lloyd stared up at the sky. Tears started to form in his green eyes.

"Where are you, father?" He asked sadly.

He missed his dad so much. Ever since the Cursed Realm had been destroyed, he couldn't stop thinking about where Garmadon was now, and if they would ever see each other again.

The green ninja reflected on his memories of his father - all the way back when Lloyd was only a kid, trying to follow in his footsteps. No matter how evil Garmadon had been, he never brought himself to harm his son. When his dark spell had been broken, he hadn't left Lloyd's side. He'd done everything to protect him, even banishing himself to the Cursed Realm.

Lloyd buried his face in his knees and started crying. He was wearing his father's robe, as he had done for several days since the incident. As he continued recalling his memories, anger bubbled inside him.

"Why?" He yelled between sobs. He threw his head back. "Why did you take him?"

The cloudy sky didn't show any sign of hearing his cry. He felt as though God were ignoring him.

"Answer me!" He sobbed. He kept his gaze fixed on the sky for a few more moments before crying into the robe again.

It seemed like hours passed. The green ninja hadn't moved from his seat on the deck. Suddenly, he was startled by a voice coming from behind him.

"Lloyd?"

He slowly lifted his head to see Kai standing at the entrance to the Bounty's deck. The fire ninja's eyes were concerned.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

When Lloyd didn't answer, Kai walked over to sit next to his friend. "What's wrong?"

Lloyd leaned on the brunet and started sobbing again. Kai instantly understood what was going through his mind. He hugged the smaller boy, trying to comfort him.

"Why did God let this happen?" Lloyd wondered quietly. He sighed. "He doesn't care about me."

Kai shook his head. "That's not true, Lloyd," he said. "I...I don't know what he's doing, but I know it's all part of his plan."

Lloyd looked into Kai's brown eyes. "How? How could any decent plan involve me losing my dad?"

The red ninja thought for a minute. "Only God knows," he told him. "But in the end, he'll work everything out. I promise."

"No," he argued. "No, he won't! There's no way he could work this out. He just felt like taking my dad. Maybe because I did something bad, I don't know. He doesn't have a plan. He just hates me, Kai! Why does he hate me?" He cried again.

"He doesn't hate you," Kai tried to reassure him. An idea crept into his mind. "Wait here. I'll be right back." He stood up and ran inside, returning a few moments later with a guitar.

"You can't cheer me up with a song," Lloyd mumbled.

Kai started playing his guitar. "Just listen to this."

"You always think I'm somewhere on a mountain top,
But never think, behind bars.
You'd be amazed the places that I go
To be with you, where you are."

Lloyd sniffed, listening to Kai sing the song. He didn't protest or argue, but he doubted it would help. Still, the red ninja kept playing.

"So forget what you've heard,
What you think that you know.
There's a lot about me
That's never been told."

"I don't wanna hear a song about God right now, Kai," Lloyd complained. "I mean, I love him, but he made me lose my dad! He doesn't love me..." He trailed off.

Kai put his hand on Lloyd's shoulder. "Lloyd, he will never stop loving you." The blonde looked uncertain, so Kai went back to his song.

"I'm more than you dream,
More than you understand.
Your days and your times
Were destined for our dance.
I catch all your tears,
Burn your name on my heart.
Be still and trust my plan...
I'm more than you think I am."

Lloyd listened to the music, still unsure that God really loved him and wasn't just punishing him for doing something wrong. Regardless, he kept quiet as Kai continued.

"Rumor has it there's a gavel in my hand,
I'm only here to condemn.
But let me tell you secrets you have never known:
I think of you as my best friend."

A tear fell from the green ninja's eye as he heard the lyrics. Is that true? He wondered. Does God really care about me, no matter what?

"So much has been said,
Even done in my name.
But I'm showing you now
Who I really am...

I'm more than you dream,
More than you understand.
Your days and your times
Were destined for our dance.
I catch all your tears,
Burn your name on my heart.
Be still and trust my plan...
I'm more than you think I am."

Kai smiled at Lloyd. The green ninja was staring at him, still teary-eyed, but he had stopped sobbing like he had been before.

I'm getting through to him, he thought, relieved. I hope he believes this, and never forgets it.

"Let me open your eyes to see
The heart of me differently, oh.
Come closer than you've ever been,
Let me in like never before.
Bring me every broken part,
The wounds and scars of who you are,
And hide in me,
And you will see..."

The setting sun was beginning to peek out from behind the clouds, casting its light on the two ninja.

"I'm more than you dream,
Oh oooh!
Your days and your times
Were destined for our dance.
I catch all your tears,
Burn your name on my heart.
Be still and trust my plan...

I'm more than you think I am!"

Lloyd thought back, reflecting on his life, and how he'd spent so much of it thinking that God was there to reward those who obeyed him and punish those who didn't. It hadn't really occurred to him that maybe, just maybe, there was more to him than that.

"More than you think I am..."

The red and green ninjas lifted their eyes to the perfect sky as Kai sung the last line.

"I'm more than you think I am."

...

I hope that was uplifting :) One of my favorite songs ever. I know it wasn't that long, but that's ok. Please review, and let me know if you want me to write more like this.

Remember that if you are ever going through a hard time, you are not alone. Jesus is always there for you, whether or not you know it. Sometimes it may seem like he doesn't love you, because he allows you to go through hard things. But he's just putting you through the fire so you can come out twice as strong and beautiful. And he will walk with you every step of the way. No matter how you imagine him, he is more than you think he is.

Stay strong, friends!

- Cinder :)

(God's not dead!)