Last name

Authors notes

This came to my mind after listening to 'Last Name' by Carrie Underwood, a song which I know of by heart because of my country music loving mum- Thanks Mum :)

Hermione is a little OOC in this story, but she has reached the end of her tether an she has finally given up on trying to keep her cool :)

Oh and a tip- read everything Declan says in an Irish accent, you'll love him more for it ;D

Dedications

This is to celebrate my eleventh story post, may not sound like a lot for some but it's a major achievement for me :)

This is for all the people who've added me as a favourite author, favourite story, author alert, story alert and anyone who has reviewed- this is for you :)

Enjoy :)

I'd like to thank 'Nyxthewolf' for beta-ing this story and many others :)

Disclaimer

I don't own any of the Harry Potter series, all the glory belongs to the magnificent J. and I am making no profit from this fan fiction, it's for entertainment purposes only.

Chapter One- Only the books

Inside the Three Broomsticks, Hannah Abbot smiled at Hermione as she came to order another round of butterbeers, and a pumpkin juice for the heavily pregnant Ginny. Hermione smiled back as she handed over the money, and after a nod she levitated the drinks back to the table.

She sat down and took a sip of her own butter-beer whilst the others took their drinks, giving chimes of thanks. Harry passed the pumpkin juice to Ginny, who gave him a stern look which plainly said I'm pregnant not paralysed'. Harry smiled sheepishly, pecking her on the cheek and resting his free hand on her stomach.

Hermione smiled as she took another sip, but then snorted and choked on some of the drink when she saw Lavender coo-ing into Ron's ear while twisting a lock of his ginger hair around her pinkie finger. Ron went crimson and Lavender blushed and fiddled with her bracelet, while Harry and Ginny chortled.

Hermione wiped the dribble of drink from her chin just as Ginny's eyes lit up. She gestured for everyone to lean in and whispered, 'I was owling Neville yesterday, and he told me...' she looked up and over to the bar quickly and then leant back down, 'he is planning on proposing to Hannah!' she quietly squealed, Hermione took a glance at the oblivious Hannah, grinning to somebody. Lavender did a cliché girl squeal whilst flapping her hands about in excitement and wailed which caused Hermione to inwardly shudder. Harry was nodding and Ron looked proud, all of them shot looks at an unaware Hannah who was serving various people at the bar.

'Good on him!' Harry said smiling at Ginny and everyone nodded, 'Marrying Gin was the best thing I did.' he said, his green eyes sparkling. Ginny rolled her eyes but her freckled cheeks flushed. Ron made a joke gagging noise whilst Lavender bit her lip, almost crying at the sentiment. Hermione thought she would heave at the un-diluted syrupy cliché of a reaction.

Ron coughed to bring everyone's attention. He licked his lips as Lavender grabbed his hand, while Hermione frowned.

'Speaking of, uhm, engagements...' Ron said, and Hermione's stomach dropped as he lifted Lavender's hand to reveal a disgustingly large and audacious ring. Hermione felt some drink-dribble splutter from her mouth as Ron began to say but was interrupted by Lavenders scream.

'WE'RE ENAGAGED!'

Hermione winced at the pitch of her voice, Harry patted Ron on the back in congratulations and Ginny was admiring the ring, although both of the Potters were really watching Hermione in their peripherals.

Engaged, Hermione thought, everything feeling in slight slow motion as she took it in. It hurt, sure, but it was more of stinging realisation that she was still single. The shock of that hurt more. She quickly regained her composure and threw a smile onto her face, hugging Ron and Lavender and crooned at the gargantuate ring along with Ginny. This seemed to pacify the Potters for now but they both still kept glancing at her.

As they spoke, the looks slowly started to grind away at Hermione's already raw nerve. Why did they keep looking at her? She and Ron had broken up years ago! Did they…pity her?

She could not deal with the looks of pity, and she most certainly didn't want to be that poor sap of a girlwho was the lonely single of the group who envied everyone's happiness. Point one, it wasn't true. She was happy as she was, and point two, both of them looking at her like this meant she'd undoubtedly be the next topic of conversation and be set up on some horrendously awkward blind dates.

Hermione took another sip of her butterbeer, trying to keep her anger on simmer and so along with everyone else started throwing round some ideas into the planning of the wedding. Slowly, despite Hermione's attempts to avoid it, the topic wandered off somewhat to couples.

'I heard Dennis Creevey started going out with a muggle girl.' Harry said adding to the now growing list of people entering relationships, and everyone awh'd.

'Oh,' Hermione said, 'I bumped into Eddie Carmichael the other day,' the others gave her a blank stare so she rolled her eyes and elaborated, 'Eddie Carmichael he was the year above us... Ravenclaw…had the big ears?' she gestured and everyone nodded then so she continued. 'He was talking to me and told me he and his partner,' (she scoffed at their shocked faces) 'were thinking of tying the knot soon themselves!' everyone gasped.

'Bloody 'ell!' Ron said 'Never thought Eddie'd be gay, not that there's a problem with that or anything...' he added.

'I know,' Harry and Ginny said together, 'It's nice for him though.' Ginny added smiling and everyone smiled.

'It seems like everyone is settling down...' Lavender said mushily, and Hermione froze praying to Merlin no one would bring her into the conversation...

'What about you Hermione? Is anybody on the scene yet?' Ginny asked with a playful wink, before she took a sip of her pumpkin juice.

Damn you Ginevra Molly Weasley, damn you to the fiery pits of Azkaban.

Hermione thought and sent mental daggers in Ginny's general direction as she took a deep breath.

She noticed they were all staring at her, she was pretty sure Ron even dribbled a bit.

'Sure, now I have their undivided attention,' she thought.

'No, there's nobody as of yet.' Hermione said, adding an unintentional sigh that must have seemed to the others as sadness at her current relationship status or indeed lack thereof, when really it was of utter boredom at what her answer was sure to trigger.

'I'm sure you'll find someone Hermione.' Harry said with a smile, and Ginny nodded and Hermione wanted to slam her face down on the table.

'I bet you're just playing hard to get, I bet you've got offers from left right and centre!' Ginny suggested with a raised eyebrow. Ron snorted which not only gained him a under that table from Ginny but a burning look from Hermione who felt her anger bubbling.

'I do have offers, though nothing spectacular.' Hermione said, hoping they'd stop this monotonous drivel soon before her temper exploded.

'What about that guy…Cai, was his name?' Ginny asked, moving her hand in a circular gesture for elaboration.

'Caleb. Two dates, he was ok, filled to the brink with arrogance and not an ounce of intelligence is his abnormally shaped head.' Hermione nodded to finish her statement quite pleased with, in her opinion, a very accurate description. Besides he'd not looked in her eyes once one either of that dates - apparently her boobs had been more appealing.

'Maybe you're too picky?' Harry offered, and Hermione bit her lip.

'Maybe you need to change your look?' Lavender said. 'Get some nice girly dresses, do your hair, get some make up, you'll look alright and then get out a bit!' she smiled, but couldn't help but let her jaw slacken a little, her breath knocked out of her. Harry's eyes went wide, Ginny's mouth was agape and Lavender slapped her hand over her mouth as soon as she realised what she'd said. She looked apologetic and bit her bottom lip, but Hermione struggled to keep her anger under reign. She bit down hard on her tongue to hold back a vicious retort.

'I fine with how I look now, thanks...' Hermione almost snarled but retained her composure, though each word was punctuated with a full stop.

'I get out enough too.' she added, mentally creating a list of places she'd been this week, and added a few fake ones to bulk it out in case they asked. She took another sip of her drink, finishing it.

'You don't really though 'mione, when we were together you just read.' Ron said lightly.

'Just because the only book you've ever read was Babbity Rabbity and her cackling stump.' she retorted. She could feel her tether fraying; she knew she'd crack soon.

They weren't even just haphazardly trying to help this time! It was getting plain mean, she thought to herself as her nerves started to fry. Harry's eyebrows vanished beneath his messy hair line and he decided to concentrate on his mug. Ginny looked slightly taken aback, Lavender looked plain horrified and Ron's face had flushed in anger.

'Okay, but who is engaged Hermione? I obviously haven't done too badly for myself have I? He said, his face growing redder. He ignored Ginny's not-so-subtle kick from under the table and stood up.

'Yes Ronald, you are engaged, but at least I have more brain cells than a wrackspurt! I don't mind being single, I could be in a relationship if I wanted!' Hermione said standing too, her jaw jutting out, and she tried to hold back the tears and the lump in her throat. She clutched her wand, resisting the burning need to hex the angry ginger.

'I may not be smart Hermione but at least I have a life! You never do anything but read! You're not spontaneous! You just read, and that because you know if you did really try to be with someone you'd realise it's only your books that will ever love you!' He yelled.

The pub had gone quiet. Everyone's mouth was agape at the table and the whole pub was looking at Hermione.

Hermione's heart panged with pain and rage. Her face burned with rage and humiliation, so she turned to the rest of the table, her throat and chest feeling tight. Her eyes were watery but she held them back. She would not cry. Ron's face was still red but even his eyes were wide.

'Harry, Ginny, Lavender, it was great seeing you, but I have to go.' She said grabbing her coat off the chair, she pulled out of Ginny's grip on her wrist and kept walking towards the door despite their desperate protests and pleas. She heard Ginny furiously screaming at Ron fade out as the thick wooden door shut behind her.

She let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding, relishing in the cool breeze against her face. She for a moment turned to go back into the pub, picturing Ron's face as she punched him straight in the nose. No, she was bigger than that. She relaxed her tensed fists but continued to let herself imagine the feeling of Ron's nose breaking under her fists as she stormily walked forwards.

How dare he say those things to her!

She mentally raged as she stormed through Hogsmeade thinking of every curse and hex she could think of. I'll hex that red headed imbecile to Nurmengard! She thought as she wiped a treacherous tear angrily from her cheek with her coat sleeve.

Hermione didn't even know where she was going, knowing if she stopped she'd just apparate straight back to the three broom sticks. She kept walking long out of Hogsmeade and ended up walking down a deserted country path.

'Only your books will ever love you' Ron's voice sneered in her mind and without hesitating she snarled 'bombarda maxima,' at a haystack. It exploded magnificently, the needles of hay rocketing into the air then twirling back to the floor like confetti. She stood there watching the spindles fall to the ground and when the last piece had fallen she began walking again, slowly plucking the strands from her hair.

Then she carefully put her wand in her pocket, and patted it. That was very irrational Hermione, she thought as she walked, but she couldn't help but feel slightly less livid. Then she mentally reprimanded herself, she would not calm down. Not this time, she thought. She was not going to let this just blow over like the thousands of arguments before. She continued walking, silently remembering all of their arguments. By the time she'd thought of the last few feuds she was livid again and she decided she definitely deserved another drink or two and apparated straight to an alley close to the Leaky Cauldron.

Hermione shook herself down; double checking she'd removed all the straws of hay before exiting the alley and heading straight to the pub.

She'd found the pub after the war, after her and Ron had broken up and she just needed to get away. She had brought the others here too, but they preferred the ones in Hogsmeade. She couldn't explain why she liked the pub; there was just something about it that she liked. It was cosy, it had snug corners where people could sit and read undisturbed.

She closed the sturdy door behind herself, and went to the bar. She sat down and ordered herself a bottle of firewhiskey. The barman raised his eyebrows a little but still smiled politely. She poured the liquid into the tumbler and downed it, focusing hard on the burning sensation in her throat instead of the anger burning in her chest.

After her fourth glass Hermione had calmed down considerably and just watched the other people in the pub go about their lives with content. The pub began to liven up as the sun began to set, so she'd ordered some chips and a bottle of wine and watched as people came and left as she ate and drank.

She continued drinking, feeling the alcohol soothe her frayed nerves, content to sit and watch the other people in the pub. It had livened up a bit, then as the night grew on the population of the pub shrank to a few small groups and one larger group.

They were celebrating something she gathered, their cheerful voices carried over to her and she caught bits and pieces of their conversation, she took another gulp of wine and became lost in a photograph and a hilly countryside with a young couple in front of them.

She didn't hear a majority of the larger group leave until a person placed a glass down right next to her, making her jump suddenly out of her reverie.

'Oh, sorry, didn't mean to make yeh jump there.' the man said in a soft but masculine Irish accent, which made Hermione swoon.

'It's no problem.' she smiled and looked up to see the man and she froze.

She ogled shamelessly.

Taking in every inch of the man as he obliviously ordered another drink, the man was tall and slim, but through his simple shirt Hermione could defiantly see he had enough muscles to make a woman drool. He had chocolate brown curls that were more messy than styled but still looked utterly adorable. She raked over the rest of his body admiring the way his dark jeans showed of his rather appealing behind. She looked back up to see his face, his skin was tanned enough to show he'd travelled, and from this angle his face was angular and statuesque. He had a straight nose, a perfectly straight and defined jaw and prominent cheekbones. As he spoke she couldn't help but watch his lips reveal his lovely white teeth and absently she wondered what it'd be like to kiss him…

A warm chuckle made her realise he was watching her ogling at him. She blushed and bit her lip, he laughed again and she couldn't help but laugh a little with him despite her burning embarrassment. She looked up to his face and made contact with his eyes and instantly noticed something strange and beautiful. One pupil was fully dilated and the other was narrowed. Anisocoria. Hermione remembered vaguely reading about it once, then she noticed the warm brandy coloured iris that looked almost liquid has he smiled at her.

Merlin he is handsome.

He slid over a shot glass of fire whiskey into her hand and she said thanks as she downed it. He raised his eyebrows and returned the gesture by raising a single eyebrow with a slight smirk on her face.

'A woman who can down shots, I like that.' he said as he ordered two more shots with the raise of his hand, and Hermione smiled. 'It's a lovely night don't you think?' he said after he downed a shot of his own, Hermione shrugged with a small smile.

'You don't talk much do yeh curly?' he mused, trying to make eye contact with Hermione, and this, as he'd intended, prodded her into conversion.

I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Vent, Ogle and Review :)

Read long and prosper,

RandomReggie

:)