A/N: First ever fanfiction! so, here goes nothing i guess.

please review if you like the story so far, it would be REALLY appreciated.

PS: Italics are thoughts, the past, or the future.

I woke up to the filtered light inside of the church and the warmth of a person lying with me. Looking around my vaguely familiar surroundings, I felt only two things :

Fear. Where was Johnny? Did he go elsewhere? If he did runaway (more than we already had), then why didn't he take Pony and me with him? Had he abandoned us? Did the fuzz catch him?

Before my insides could completely lock in ice, the other feeling took over me completely.

Flustered. I was curled around Ponyboy, my arms around his neck and my legs tangled in his. His arm was draped over my shoulder, his pink lips just inches from mine. I was blushing madly, the heat from embarrassment clouding my head. The most awkward thing in all of this was that I liked the closeness the situation brought. I wanted him to stay twisted with me. My heart pumped furiously as I thought of what other people might think. I also realized that a part of me didn't care.

Trying to relax my breathing, I gently laid my head back on the cobblestone floor, and fell asleep once more.

(KPOV)

It started out like any normal day of the week. I woke up, took a shower, got dressed and ready for school, and snuck out of my house with my brother, Johnny. I stood in my bra and underwear, looking at myself angrily in my cracked bedroom mirror that Monday morning. The bruises covered my ribs and arms, and my cheek had swollen into a mottled bump on my face.

I walked silently to the kitchen on my tiptoes, careful to avoid the creaky step on the stairs. My mom had told me earlier that whores who hang out with gang members don't deserve food and had ordered me to stay upstairs in my room. 'I'm not letting myself starve in this hellhole no matter what she says,' I murmured to myself. I managed to open the fridge without making that annoying click it usually does. Pulling out a sandwich slowly, I fell backwards, hitting the cold linoleum tiles. But my head hit something too soon. I know I'm not laying on the floor. I looked up slowly at my dad. The stench of beer wafted down off his breath, burning my nose. He looked crazy.

"What're you sneakin' inta tha kitshen for?" he asks slowly, slurring his words.

I answered quickly, because he's never more dangerous than when he's drunk.

"I was hungry, so I came to get something…" I didn't know what else to say.

There wasn't much time to get anything out. He kicked me suddenly in the ribs, laughing when I gasped in shock.

'You thunk jus' because I let you stay in my house, that you kin jus' eat my food?' he yelled questioningly at me. He kicked me again, but it hit my arm instead. He got down on his knees and punched me in the arms and ribs some more. He took off his belt and started hitting me with that too. It burned, it felt like the fire was spreading quickly as the blood vessels broke in my skin.

'This'll teash ya not to eat my food,' he yelled again before slugging me in the face. I cried out in pain. My hand flew up to my face, and I felt moisture threatening to leave my eyes. He left, but not until he ate the sandwich in front of me and ordered me to go upstairs.

I ran willingly up the wooden stairs into Johnny's room and buried my face in his arms.

My face hurt like crazy. And not just the bruise, but my eyes. I had cried in Johnny's arms for a good two hours before we decided to sneak out his giant bedroom window, and even when we reached the lot, I just held onto my older brother again and sobbed. Johnny just sat with me and stroked my hair, letting me stain his only jacket with salt water. It was freezing, so we had to go back, but he had to lead me there since my eyes were dried out. It didn't make sense why I cried so much when I've been hit by my dad before. Was it because neither of my parents cared if I was killed, even if it was by their own hand? I don't love them. I don't even go out of my way to win their affection like Johnny tries to. I think he knows its a lost cause, but he tries anyway. I think he's okay with the idea that me and the gang might be the only ones who care about him.

A quiet knock on my bedroom door snapped me out of the rage.

"Kittie?" I barely heard Johnny's muffled questions. "Kittie, you ready yet?"

"Just a minute, Johnnycake," I called to him in a hushed way. I hoped I didn't sound too angry.

I quickly threw on my black shirt and jeans. They used to be Johnny's, but since we're not exactly rolling in the dough on the east side of town, they're just fine. The shirt fits a little tight and the jeans have big holes in the knees, but that doesn't bother me so much. I slipped on my black sneakers and quickly grabbed my small switchblade off my dresser. I stashed it in the side of my bra, just below my armpit. Ever since Johnny got jumped by those Socs, we both started carrying one.

I harshly pulled a brush through my long black hair. It was semi wet, but I didn't care. I opened the door soundlessly and Johnny gave me a small smile as I let him in my room so we could sneak out. Neither of us wanted to deal with our parents, so we came up with this solution a year ago. Johnny sat down on my old bed, his big black eyes watching me as I pulled the mirror and powder out of my old wooden dresser. I tried my best to cover up the huge bruise on my face with makeup.

The guys'll know anyways, I thought. They always do. I sighed internally.

When the bruies was hidden as much as I could hide it, I threw them back in my dresser. Johnny ran a comb through his hair, touched the scar on his tan face, and kissed me swiftly on the forehead. We then climbed out of my bedroom window into the cold morning, headed for Pony's house. The cold morning air stung my skin as I walked down the street with Johnny. The sun hadn't rose yet, but I could see light lining the horizon, painting the trees and streets with pinks and yellows. I didn't have a jacket, so I rubbed my arms for warmth. I stared jealously at my brother's denim jacket.

"Hey, Kittie?" Johnny asked suddenly. "Ya know you talk in your sleep, right?"

The blood drained from my face. I did? If I had said anything about that dream last night...it would be awkward if Johnny heard.

"Um...no, I didn't," I said softly.

He looked at me for the first time, and knew what I was dreaming must've been bad. It really wasn't, not at all, but it was about a friend of ours. Even if I did like the dream, it was really uncomfortable when I was around him and Johnny at the same time.

"You didn't say anything bad. You just kept sayin, 'I can't live without you, but this would be weird for Johnny'...I understand if you don't wanna tell me, but what were ya dreaming about?" Johnny stared at me, his eyes searching for an answer.

We walked in silence for a block before I started talking. I stared at the shadows on the houses and pavement before I looked into Johnny's eyes seriously.

"You can't tell anyone, and I mean it. It'd be really awful if any of the guys knew..." I glanced away and took a deep breath before I lost my nerve. It's Johnny, your brother, I thought. You can tell him anything.

"I have the same dream almost every night, but where I am is never the same..." I began. Johnny nodded with a strange look on his face.

"We-"

I was cut off when a bandana wrapped around my eyes and a hand cupped around my mouth. I tried to remove the arms, but they locked tighter around me, one at my waist, the other on my face. They were pushing on my unhealed bruises, making me squirm and scream, but the screams stayed trapped in my throat, forming odd screeches. I could hear Johnny mumbling yells and struggling somewhere nearby. Knowing hope was lost there, I started thrashing blindly, kicking out my legs and arms.

Fuck! I'm gonna die! I screamed in my head. The red of the bandana grew brighter as I struggled, so I knew the sun was rising. I hit my attacker in the stomach and they let me go. Running with the blindfold intact, I tripped on broken, raised cement sections. I kept getting up after I fell, but I tripped once more and hit my temple.

Red faded in my mind as I passed out.

A/N: Cliffhanger here. :)

This was edited from earlier chapters. I decided since the "beginning filler chapters" were a little long, that i'm going to condense them.

soo yeah.