Author's Note: This is part of the DAYDverse. DAYD stands for Dumbledore's Army and the Year of Darkness by thanfiction (his ff dot net penname). It is a truly amazing work that follows Neville through his seventh year at Hogwarts. While you can read this not having read Year of Darkness, I would highly suggest reading it as well as all the other works by thanfiction.
Disclaimer: JKR gave them being and names. Andy (thanfiction) gave them personalities and histories. As for me? I'm just giving them this scene.
"Terry," Mike's voice sounded from across the room. The sixteen year old boy with long blonde hair looked up from his volume on fundamental components of charms, "Have we done anything new this year?"
"Of course we have," Terry answered, "We took our OWLs, joined an illegal study group, learned several new spells and potions-"
"No," Mike interjected, "I mean, outside of class. Like, that we tried every muggle treat we could find or when we attempted to make up our own language so McGonagall couldn't read our notes or when we learned Legilimencyso that McGonagall couldn't catch us passing notes in any language. You know, real life feats."
"Like having your first girlfriend and break up? Or getting addicted to calming potions?"
Mike gave him a severe look, "You are being purposely daft and difficult." Terry shrugged and smirked.
"Did you have something new in mind? Or were you simply being introspective?"
"Well," Michael started enthusiastically, "You've been weaned off potions, so that doesn't stand in our way. And my parents won't be home from their weekend in France until tomorrow, so that doesn't stand in our way. And we've got enough alcohol that my parents would never know any was missing, so that doesn't stand in our way."
"Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?" Terry asked skeptically.
"Why not? We finished our OWLs and school doesn't start up again for nearly two months. We're sixteen, so we're not children anymore. It'd be a learning experience. And better to test your tolerance and learn your limit at home with a trusted friend than at some crazy party thrown by careless-to-the-point-of-stupidity-Gryffindors."
"You put up a rational and well thought out argument," Terry said, a grin spreading across his face.
"Excellent," Mike smiled and walked across his living room into the dining room where Mr. and Mrs. Corner kept their alcohol. Not even a minute passed before he returned holding two glasses and a bottle of firewhiskey.
"Does this seem like an adequate amount for us to start with?" Mike asked, holding up the two half-full glasses?
"I think each of those has about four drinks in it, Mike."
"Then I saved us a bit of pouring later." The boys lifted their glasses and each took a large drink.
"Much… stronger… than butterbeer," Terry spluttered and coughed after swallowing half his glass. Mike smirked. Yes, it was a lot stronger than butterbeer. But, then again, wasn't that the point?
***
"What I think is astounding," Mike said, several hours (and several drinks) later, "is that such a seemingly innocent beverage can incapacitate one so effectively that he can no longer walk properly or converse in a coherent manner."
"You're practically a potions master in training, Mike," Terry responded bit louder than was strictly necessary, "You should know what power a liquid can hold."
"Yes, well, I suppose the rationale I offered outweighed any previous knowledge I may have had."
"You make absolutely no sense."
"I'll drink to that!" Michael exclaimed, taking another drink.
"'I'll' is a contraction of the pronoun 'I' and the verb 'will.' However, 'will drink' is the verb of the sentence and 'I' is the subject. 'To that' would be an indirect object," Terry rambled. Mike stared at him.
"What, in Merlin's name, are you doing?" he asked in drunken bemusement.
"Parsing," Terry answered.
"Why the bloody hell are you parsing?"
"Because I can," Terry sat in thought for a moment, "Though, 'because I can' isn't really a sentence. It's a phrase. Were it part of a sentence, it'd be a dependent clause. Of the clause, 'I' is the subject and-"
"Terry, mate," Mike said slowly, "I love you. I really do. And I know you're smart. But, could you please stop parsing, as I really could care less?"
"Si tu veux," Terry consented. He paused for a moment before starting up again, "je veux, tu veux, elle veut, nous voulons, elles veulent, j'ai voulu tu as voulu elle a voulu nous avons-"
"In d'name of'll things holy," Michael slurred, "Stop conjugating!"
"Okay," was Terry's response. The two boys sat in silence for a long while, not talking or drinking, just being.
"Y'know, drinking isn't as fun as I thought it would be," Michael stated after several minutes, "People always talk about it like it's fun to drink."
"I think that's because they usually do it when there are girls," Terry said pensively, "I believe it would be much more enjoyable were girls in the equation."
"You're probably right."
"Of course I am," Terry laughed, "But I guess we'll just have to settle for what we've got right now."
"Indeed," Michael agreed, "And, as long as you don't start parsing again, I'm completely okay with it."