Peter Pan 2: The Reckoning

Author's Note: This is a sequel to the movie. There are some differences that I think they're pretty minor, but just consider that the movie got it wrong, not me. Please support the official release of Peter Pan, copyright of Disney Movies.

Chapter 1: What happened first

Peter Pan was sitting in his house playing a game with his hands. It was Rock, Paper, Scissors. He was also playing against Wendy and he was winning because Tinkerbell was helping him cheat by saying what move she was going to play. Then, all of a sudden, he lost because Tinkerbell decided cheating was bad.

"What's wrong, Tink?" he asked Tink, confident that the answer was something. She didn't respond in words but she made a dinging noise instead. That's how she talks. Luckily he could understand her, so she told him why she stopped cheating. Wendy didn't know how to understand her so she didn't know that Peter was cheating and also that Tinkerbell was cheating even though she wasn't anymore.

They were all so distracted that they didn't notice Captain Hook sneak in and then he kidnapped Wendy when they weren't looking. Nobody found out until Peter tried to keep playing Rock, Paper, Scissors and he didn't have an opponent. "Aww, shit," thought Peter thoughtfully, "Now I'm gonna have to rescue Wendy." Then out loud he said "Tink, ya wanna help? We're gonna rescue Wendy!"

Tinkerbell did that thing where she puts her hands on her hips, and stuck out her tongue. She obviously didn't want to help. It was a secret to everyone that she had a private crush on Peter Pan, therefore Wendy was the competition. Tinkerbell was selfish enough so that she didn't care if Wendy died. It's a good thing Wendy doesn't die in this story.

Later that day, Peter finished gathering all the lost boys together for an important meeting. "It has come to my attention that Captain Hook has kidnapped Wendy. He is a son of a bitch."

"Oh no," said most of them.

"Also, I forgot that he left a note behind. Here it is."

It turned out that the note said:

Dear Peter Pan:

I stole Wendy from your house. If you do not agree to my demands, you won't get her back and I will feed her to the alligator. Then we will see who is the better person.

I require a ransom of $1 million dollars in unmarked bills. You can leave it at the mermaid pool. If you ever want to see her again you better need to do this, or else. Come alone.

Sincerely,

Capt. James Tiberius Hook, Esq.

P.S. Thanks

That's why Peter read it, and then he read it to the lost boys. "We can't afford that, because kids don't have jobs or money" responded Peter Pan. None of the lost boys were democrats so they didn't say "yes we can," but one of them, I guess maybe Nibs, said a question that went "What if we just save her without the money?"

Peter was shocked by that suggestion, because it didn't occur to any of them, not even him (except the one who thought of it, obviously). But he was so shocked that he decided it was the right idea to do, so he said they were gonna do that. "Fuck yeah," he said, "Good job, Nibs. We can have a secret spy rescue mission! We don't need any silly gadgets!"

Author's note: They don't have fancy cars and spy goggles in Never Land, the only technology is pirate technology like binoculars and swords and compasses because sometimes they get them from Captain Hook and Mr. Smee, no digital watches with poison gas or anything.

Since Tinkerbell wasn't helping, the lost boys couldn't fly, so they had to walk. Fortunately, they didn't have to walk because they had a boat with wheels. It was attached with pedals on it so they all rode it like a bike, except Peter because he was flying, and Wendy because she wasn't there. That worked awfully well and they didn't have to get tired like they would when walking. Walking is hard if you have to go all the way to the mermaid pool.

So onward and farther they pressed until they got to about a hundred yards away from the mermaid pool. Then they hid next to some trees and behind a rock. This was so that they would not be seen. Peter used a periscope (it's basically just binoculars and mirrors, both of which pirates have, so it can be in this story, okay!?) to see over the rock he was behind to see the pirates, and the pirates couldn't see him back unless they looked really close. But there was a tree in the way, so he had to move to the side a little bit...

Author's note: To be continued