Time is a funny only thing isn't it? When you are younger, you want to be older just you can try out all the things that people say are bad for you and when you are older, you want to claw every second of youth back because you have made mistake after mistake, learned from some, none from others. It is so strange when you actually sit down and think about it. But as I say,to me time doesn't really mean much except maybe one thing. For me, time means healing. Like say when you have a broken arm or a leg or in my case my heart, it takes time to heal, doesn't it? They say time heals all wounds, well I hope mine heals soon.
You see, a few weeks ago, my boyfriend, well that is how everyone saw him. To me, he was the meaning of life, all I could see was him, all I could breathe was him, my heart beat for him and I was his. His name was Edward Cullen, and as far as I was concerned, be was put on this earth for me and me alone. I thought we were forever, I was wrong.
So anyways, little bit of information about Edward, well he is a vampire, no I am not kidding. He is a bloodsucking good for nothing vampire. Him and his whole, let's go to school and try to fit in with the humans and make them look plain and disgusting because we are so perfect and beautiful, family. Their leader or "dad" as they called him was Carlisle, get this, he was a doctor of all things, dealing with blood every day, go figure? Then came the form of mommy dearest in Esme, then the brother's and sister's come into play with Alice or pixie bitch as she is now known and the ice queen Rosalie, the brother's were overbearing I've got to hug you but accidentally might crush you to death Emmet and then comes the emotional, I want to suck you dry but I won't do it because you make my pretend sister who is really my wife by the way, happy. If you asked me a few weeks ago, I would still be defending them. But now, I know they are all kinds of fucked up.
They had claimed to be vegetarians, how in the ever loving fuck do you get a veggie vamp? It just doesn't make sense. Anyway, because they killed only animals, that made them veggies. I know your probably thinking that finding the information out about them being vampires and also being dangerous and all, should have sent alarm bells off in me, but it didn't.
You see, vampires have this thing they can do called dazzling, and that is exactly what they did to me. They dazzled me with their grace and beauty, thing's that I don't have because I am plain, clumsy and rather boring. But that is what they did. They sucked me in and spat me out literally. It is kind of ridiculous looking back on what happened.
Pixie bitch decided that it would be great to throw me a party for my eighteenth birthday, a party which I never wanted might I add. As I was opening one of my presents, clumsy little me gets a papercut, one of those tiny little cuts that bleed profusely, yeah a papercut in a house full of blood craving vampires is seriously not a good thing. It all erupted from that moment, Jasper, the emotional car crash,lunged at me, trying to suck me dry, I was a walking blood bank after all, So I do not blame him. Then once things calmed down, Edward took me home and the next day he dumped my ass, saying he was tired of pretending of being human for me and that I was nothing but a distraction for him and his family.
It's been three week's since then, I have had enough of wallowing in self pity. I am turning my life around and it is for the better. You see, I never realized about them dazzling me till last week and that's when I got Cullen and his family had well and truly fucked me over, well not anymore.
My name is Bella Swan and I am an ex Cullen addict.
This is my life, my story and for once, I'm in fucking charge.