Title: Memoirs Of A Young Genius

Character(s): Dr. Spencer Reid, supported by members of the BAU

Rating: FRM

Challenge: #3 Secret Valentines

Warning: Quotes from various episodes

Disclaimer: I do not nor will I ever own any of the characters on CM or the show itself. Just so you know.

Summary: A brief look into what makes up the man known as Doctor Spencer Reid.

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
-St. Augustine

I am no child but I'm someone's child.

I don't scare easily but I am still afraid of the dark; why you may ask? Because the abhorrent absent of light causes the imagination to run wild wondering what's there when the human eyes cannot adjust well enough to see anything.

I'm a genius but I'm not always smart about what I say, think or do and that's to be expected they tell me.

I'm allowed to enter the minds of different people on a daily basis but I keep my mind close off from others for fear of what they'll find upon entering. Why? "Did you know that schizophrenic is hereditary?" and "Because I know what it's like to be scar of your own mind."

I'm no one's sibling never have been and never felt I could be. That was until I met Agent Jennifer JJ Jareau, she's the only one that calls me Spence you know and she treats me like a younger brother. It's an awesome feeling to be thought of like that.

I have never had a dad growing up because he left when I was very young, which made it hard for my mom to care for me with her illness. But then I met Jason Gideon and without trying he managed to fill that role sufficiently with Aaron Hotchner who happens to be our Unit Chief providing support as an uncle of sort.

One would never guess but ever since I've gotten to know the members of the BAU they've become the family I never had but wished I did. People that care and protect me something that my biological one never did.

I hated jocks in school; they were always daft, obnoxious and liked to bully the little guys, myself included and since all that's happened is me becoming a six foot plus twelve year old to most I didn't think joining the FBI/BAU would change being picked on. But then I hadn't met Derek Morgan, the BAU's jock of the century

He's the guy you want backing you up or going in before when you're about to face down a dangerous Unsub. Derek's not afraid to kick down doors, rough up the guy; he gets in their faces something that I could probably never do.

But Derek's also the most caring and thoughtful guy you'd ever come across. You see it when he talks to a traumatized victim especially women and children. But most surprising of all Derek's my best friend in the whole world something that goes against the laws of nature.

I've been held hostage, asked to choose a member of my team to die, injected with drugs and made to see my life flash before my eyes. I've shot Unsubs, been shot and almost blown up. It's come with the job and I wouldn't trade it for anything in this world; or would I?

I don't think I've ever being in love with anyone, I've met individuals that I was attracted to but being the awkward antisocial geek that I am or was it proved difficult to talk to these persons never mind express a romantic interest in them. On the other hand no one's ever expressed genuine romantic interest in me because of me; Lila clung to me because I provided protection from an unknown threat and Austin was more interested in my job than in me. No one wanted me for me except him, the one person I was sure would never ever be interested in me in a sexual way.

Today I can safely and honestly say that I'm in love, yes in love with the most wonderful, gorgeous and caring individual that some persons can only dream of, that I had only thought existed in my dreams as well; the most sexual individual I've ever come across in my thirty years of existence. I can't get enough of the kisses, the touches and caress that are lavished on me, the way he lays me down and makes love to me so tenderly at times.

We've built a relationship on love, trust and honesty over the years that no amount of flirting with the ladies can break. He's all I hunger for when and I know it's the same with him.

I wasn't easy at first we defied the rule that said no fraternizing with co-workers and then directly disobeyed and order to cease and desist the relationship or suffer the consequences. We would have walked away from our job had it not been for the support of our team members. I recall how then went to bat for us especially our unit chief and Rossi; Garcia threatening to sabotage the entire FBI if they carried through on their threat.

I am thankful that it never came to that, thankful that we were able to keeping working at the BAU and have our relationship and still remain the professionals we always were.

Today Derek and I have been together for almost ten years, we have five beautiful children who we love with all our hearts and soul. They are so much like us that its scares us sometimes but we can lone seek to guide them with as much love and devotion as any parent can give to their children.

I've felt cursed at times because of my gift and because of my mom's illness, I've felt terrified and lonely; I've felt like a disappointment to those that I look up to but through all those ups and downs one things remained constant and that Derek's unwavering, unconditional love and devotion for me. It has kept me through the worst of times and warms on the coldest of days. I love you Derek Morgan, more than words will ever be able to express. Thank you for loving me.

N.B. Excerpts taken from the 'Life of Doctor Spencer Reid'