It wasn't as if I had planned to tell Artie. As a rule, I kept that I was faking a secret. I had never told anyone, and he was no exception. Still, I liked him. I really liked him. It shocked me how much I liked him. He was so not my type. He's geeky, and he's in a…wheelchair. He was sweet though, so I overlooked all that other stuff. I took him as he was, and gave him a chance.
When we went on our quasi-date that one time (I would hardly even call it that, it was in school halls after Glee club), I had such a good time. I think he did too.
I also had never intended to kiss Artie. It was sort of a spur-of-the-moment decision. I felt so happy, and he looked so adorable: puppy-dog eyes and a smile that felt personal, like it was just for you. It was my first kiss. It only lasted a few seconds, but it felt so completely right.
The only problem was that he kept bringing up the stutter. I didn't understand why, at the time. It made me feel guilty that he didn't know, and if we were going to start a relationship, I wanted to have a clean slate. I figured I'd just tell him and be over with it.
I couldn't have predicted his reaction. I froze up inside as he said what he said, and when he wheeled away I wanted nothing more than to run after him.
However, something stopped me. I realized something. It didn't matter if I ran to the ends of the earth for Artie. The truth of it was: I could run, if I wanted, but Artie never could, not if he wanted to with all his heart. We were just too different.
Even if I hadn't told Artie, I'm sure it wouldn't have worked out anyway.