Prologue

Jacob POV

I stared at the envelope in front of me, anger and heartbreak flowing rapidly through my veins. I hadn't even realized I had been gripping the table until my dad said something. "Son, we only have the one table."

I looked at my hands and quickly let go when I saw that my fingers had splintered the wood.

How could she do this? How could she just throw her life away to live forever? Who wanted to live forever, anyway? That family of bloodsuckers she called hers didn't even want to live forever—they hadn't been given a choice. If they had, they would've all said no. Each and every one of them made that very clear. Yet here she was, choosing to live forever. To see everything, to watch her loved ones grow old and die while she remained eighteen. Never changing. Never growing. Never actually living.

I had to get out of here. I had to think. I know that Bella would be devastated if I didn't go to her wedding, but why should I care? After all the pain and suffering she'd put me through? And then I get this fancy stationary from her husband-to-be, telling me the exact date that she would be lost to me forever. How would I be able to show up there and stay in control?

Anger finally took over as the predominant emotion and I stormed out of the house, throwing the envelope in the mud just outside my door, leaving my dad behind, calling for me through the rain. I would talk to him later. I needed to figure some things out right now.

In the blink of an eye, I was in wolf form, sprinting through the forests of the Olympic Peninsula. One thing that I absolutely loved about running in wolf form—it was always so freeing. The wind rushing past, the animals going about their lives, all the different smells of nature… It was peaceful.

I didn't understand how Bella could do any of this so quickly. I understood love—believe me, if I could marry Bella right now, I would—but I didn't understand love to the point of throwing your life away. Yes, she would get Edward forever, along with the rest of the Cullens. But what would she lose? She would never be able to have children, never be able to see her human friends, never be able to see her mother or Phil…. She would never be able to see or be around Charlie again. That old man loved her more than anything in the world. Her "death" would kill him. Charlie had always been a good man, a great father, and a great surrogate uncle to me—he didn't deserve this.

She would also lose me. The pack was allowing her to change and keep the treaty intact because it was her decision, but that didn't mean that we were going to be all buddy-buddy with the vamps. If she became a newborn and did anything to put the humans around us in jeopardy, we would have to get rid of her. I would have to kill her. We could never be friends after this.

Did she even care?

I hadn't even realized that I had stopped until I found myself sitting in front of a small lake with a waterfall running into it. I looked around.

Nothing looked familiar. Where was I?

Jake? Are you okay? Sam phased and asked. He was still in La Push.

I sighed. Sam, can I just be alone for a while, please?

Sam let out a small whimper. If you want. But I do have some things to say to you before I let you wallow in your own self-pity.

I growled at him. What do you want?

Jacob. Watch your tone. I don't want to have to make you come back, but I will if I feel the need.

Fine. What?

Bella's made her choice. She's going to marry the leech and she's going to become one. You need to accept it and move on. So, instead of running away from your problems—problems of your past—why not move on to a future?

I was confused. What future? What are you talking about, Sam?

Sam sighed. Your education, Jake. You want to be a mechanic, right? Why not take that one step up and become a mechanical engineer? Get your GED, go to college. I'm willing to let you go wherever you want, even if it's across the country. We have enough wolves phased now to hold down the fort and I don't see any impending wars on the forefront. If anything comes up, I'll let you know.

Still confused. Why was he suddenly concerned about my future outside of wolf business? What brought this on?

You can't run around as a wolf for the rest of your life, Jake. I mean, I guess you could, but think about everything you'd be missing out on. All the things and people you love that you'd be giving up. And you'd be giving it all up for some girl who wasn't even meant to be yours.

I love her, I snarled.

And I understand that. But Jacob, think about it. If she had chosen you and you two got together, got married, maybe had a kid or two, and then you imprinted—what then? Would you really want to do that to her? Trust me, Jake. That is not something anyone should ever have to experience. From either end. Just look at Leah and me. Would you want that to be Bella and you someday?

No… I sighed, defeated. You're right. He had a valid point. Bella may have ended up bitter and bitchy like Leah if she'd chosen me, and if I were to run away and be a wolf for the rest of my life, would I be any different than her? Yes, I would still be alive, but I'd be leaving my friends and family behind, never to hear from me again. I could not—would not—do that.

I stood up and started heading back to La Push from the direction I'd come. What do you suggest, then, Sam?

First thing's first. Get your GED and apply to schools everywhere and anywhere you would want to go. Oh, and Quil and Embry want to do this, too. I could hear the smile in his voice.

Quil and Em? Shouldn't they stay with the pack? If we all leave, then you're down three of your strongest wolves, I pointed out.

Yeah, but when I talked to them about this for you, they both wanted to be in on it, too. They know that once they settle down and stop phasing, they're going to need something to fall back on, and an advanced education opens a lot of doors that would otherwise be closed. It's something they really want to do. I couldn't tell them no. But they do want to go with you. Sam explained.

Going to college with Quil and Embry? That was a very dangerous thought. An even more dangerous reality. But it would be great.

I arrived back in La Push and Sam and I phased back, pulled on our shorts, and stood directly in front of each other. "Okay. Let's do it. I guess I'm going back to school," I smiled. Sam grinned at me.

It took a lot of time and hard work, but I had finally managed to get my GED, along with Quil and Embry. The day before the wedding, we also all got our acceptances from Michigan State University. It was far enough away that we would have a nice break from pack business, but close enough that we could be back within a couple hours if we ran. Since we were Native American and we passed our GED test with flying colors, the university gave us all full-ride scholarships for a four-year program, as long as we kept our cumulative GPA above a 3.0. Shouldn't be too hard. Right?

"Jacob Black, you are wearing this suit, whether you like it or not!" Alice Cullen growled at me. If it weren't for the fire in her eyes, I would have laughed at her attempt to intimidate me. However, it just so happened that it was working—just a little bit.

"Pixie, I am not wearing that monkey suit."

"Jake, this is your best friend's wedding. It means a lot to her that you're here. The least you can do is make an effort to look nice and clean-cut." Her eyes suddenly turned to puppy-dog eyes.

I sighed, "Fine. But I'm only wearing the jacket and tie until the reception. Then they're gone."

Alice beamed at me. "That's good enough for me!"

I had to admit, the pixie did a great job with the ceremony and reception. Everything looked flawless. And true to my word, the suit jacket and tie were long gone. Seth was sitting next to me at our table as the happy couple made their rounds to visit with all of their guests.

"So. School soon, huh?" Seth asked, his eyes glued to the tablecloth.

I looked at him. "Yeah. Just a few more weeks. You okay, man?"

He sighed and nodded. "I'm fine." He looked up at me. "It's just going to be weird, you know? You, Quil, and Em are all going to be gone and the pack will mainly be a group of pups."

I laughed and shoved his shoulder lightly. "You're still a pup, yourself, Seth. Don't forget that." He smiled. "But I know what you mean. It'll be weird being so far away for so long. Sam's right, though. I need to do something for my future—for when I'm not doing the wolf thing anymore." Sometime while we were talking, the dances had started. Bella and Edward were currently twirling around the dance floor. Well—Edward was twirling and Bella was standing on his feet.

Once they had finished their dance, they came over to our table. Bella beamed at me. "Jake, will you dance with me?"

I laughed at her, "Promise not to step on my feet or knock me over?"

She looked down and blushed. "… You know I can't promise that." I smiled and took her hand to lead her out to the dance floor.

"Yeah, well… I can't promise that I won't do those to you, either," I chuckled. Our dance was nice. We basically just stood in one place and swayed side to side, but it was nice. Bella was resting her head on my shoulder and I rested my chin against her head. This would be the last time I would hold her like this.

"Congratulations, Bells," I murmured half-heartedly.

"Thanks, Jake," she whispered.

"So… tonight's a big night, huh?" I tried to make light of it by laughing, but I failed miserably, and I'm pretty sure I sounded like a dying dog.

"No, not yet," she answered and looked up at me. "We're having our honeymoon first."

I stared blankly at her. "What?"

She nodded meekly. "It's the last human experience I wanted."

I started to tremble. "Bella, are you crazy?! He'll kill you!"

"No he won't." she was very adamant about this. "He won't. His self-control is remarkable. Trust me," she muttered and looked away.

My shaking intensified as I let go of her and stepped away. She looked like she was going to try and come to comfort me, but Edward was there before I could blink, holding her back. My glare was suddenly trained on him. I wanted to kill him. "You know you're going to kill her by doing that. How can you claim to love her if you're so eager to risk her life just so you can get laid?!" I snarled at him. If Sam, Quil, and Embry hadn't shown up to help Seth hold me back, I'm pretty sure there would be a lot of Edward parts scattered around the dance floor.

"Jacob, calm down," Sam ordered. Alpha-ordered. I didn't have a choice. My body quit trembling, but my mind was still racing. Bella had silent tears streaming down her face and Edward was glaring at me. I gave him one last growl before I turned and stormed off into the woods and phased to run home.

I had to finish packing. I was going to school a bit early this year. Quil and Embry could meet me there.