Do you hear me, I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky oh my, baby I'm trying
There were so many books and movies about falling in love with your best friend. Dan had read and watched them all. The things about those books and movies was that they were only stories, they always forgot to mention how scary it was. They forgot to mention how you felt when you realized the person whom you trusted the most was suddenly also the one your heart desired. That's something important to say. To say how hard they tried to not feel anything. No one knew it like Dan, especially when his best friend was not a girl, and when people wrote fanfiction about the both of you on the internet. There was no doubt that that was the weirdest part.
So far, he tried everything his mind could think of to get Phil off his mind, but that seemed simply impossible. Sometimes, when Dan thought he was finally over him, all that it took was a look for all of his feelings to come back. Just one look into those beautiful blue eyes. Now was the time where he made a joke about how gay that was, but wasn't it supposed to be gay? He was now somewhat a homosexual, after all. That was the meaning of it, wasn't it? To like someone who is your own sex, not an insult.
The worst part about being gay and in love with your best friend was not knowing how he would react. In other circumstances, he liked to think Phil would be quite accepting, but not after he knew who the man Dan thought about was. His own best friend. How fucked up was that? But regardless the consequences, he had to tell. It wasn't fair, not to Phil, not to himself.
Of course the fans would be happy about it, but their reaction didn't matter right now. All that mattered was Phil. All that had ever mattered was him.
"Phil!" Dan shouted, knowing his best friend would hear it, "Come here, please."
"Just one minute, I'm making some hot chocolate."
Of course he is. With that London cold, they both regularly had cups of hot beverages.
The air seemed even colder, and every minute waiting for Phil was discouraging. Dan knew he would have to say it eventually, and today felt like the right day. Despite the cold weather, you could see the sun peeking from a cloud. It wasn't as radiant as it is meant to be, but living in England, he was used to it. Clouds were all over the sky, forming pictures. Looking out the window, he lost himself waiting for his best friend.
With the touch of a boiling hot mug on his arm, Dan jumped back.
"You've nearly scared me to death!" He shouted upon seeing the perfect figure of Phil standing in front of him. Skin white as snow, lips red as blood, and hair black as ebony. Well, someone might as well be Snow White.
"Sorry," Phil said, handing him his mug of hot chocolate, "You seemed so distracted. What's up?"
"Philip, my friend, we need to talk." Dan made his fake serious face, even though what they would talk about was of important matter.
"Oooh, I'm scared," He said, sitting down, "Shoot it."
"You know those lame movies where a guy falls in love with his best friend?"
"They're not all lame," Phil stated matter-of-factly. "But what about them?"
"I think they're starting to apply to real life."
"What are you trying to say?"
"Look, Phil... I've been trying to tell you this for a while now..."
"Dan...?"
"Just promise me that regardless of what is said here, we will still be friends." In the end, that was what he wanted. If Phil didn't feel the same way about him, at least he would still have his friendship, and that was enough for him.
"Um. Okay?" Nervous. Dan could sense that he was nervous. Did he know what came next? Should he just shrug it off and say 'I used your tooth brush'? Not after that 'I think those movies are starting to apply to real life' talk. That had been a ridiculous move.
"Philip Michael Lester," Dan started, "I think I'm starting to have feelings for you."
Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel you whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard
When the person you loved for quite a while now said he's starting to have feelings for you, what are you supposed to do? Say the same? Kiss him? Phil had no idea. This he knew; if he stayed silent for too long, Dan would think that meant he felt nothing back. How did you find an answer for that so quickly? Speechless and lost, he saw Dan getting up before him. No. This could not be happening. He would not ruin that moment. Think. Fast. So Phil did all there was to do. No, he did not kiss his friend.
"Dan! Wait!" That was his genius plan. Catching up to his friend, Phil held his shoulders, "I feel the same for you. I mean, whatever you feel for me," He said biting his lips, "You like me, don't you?"
The corner of Phil's lips went up as Dan nodded. This could possibly be the best feeling in the world. When you found out your love wasn't a one-sided thing. That you were not the only one who felt that way. His best friend smiled too, and Phil's heart nearly stopped. He had a beautiful smile. Other people might see it as regular and ordinary, but there was something about the way his whole face lit up, it was as if it made the world a better place. Such a cliché thing to say, right? That someone else's smile lit made the world a better place. But it did. And that's what love was. Love was cliché.
Phil hadn't known for how long he had felt that way about Dan, it was like one day he saw him as a completely different person. One that he wouldn't mind spending the rest of his life with. Not that he would, but if he did, it would not be bad at all. Dating could and might go right for them.
"So... Is this the moment where I kiss you or does that only happen in movies?" Dan asked, making Phil laugh.
"I'm not saying you should, but I wouldn't mind if you did."
"Wouldn't it make things awkward between us?"
"Only if you're a bad kisser. I'm confident that I am an amazing one."
"Says who?" Dan teased. "I'll only believe it if I feel it for myself."
That was more than enough encouragement for Phil. The day was cold, but at the first touch of Dan's body he felt more warmth than he had in ages. Grabbing him by the hand, pulling him closer to Phil, everything was going perfectly. It did still feel a little awkward touching his best friend like that, but their feelings had been secret for too long, and they needed to take it all out. It felt nice to have Dan for himself, and not be jealous of fans so much younger than them. It wasn't exactly jealousy, seeing they shipped the both of them more than anything; but he felt a sense of protection, of property. Their faces were now close together, and he could smell his best friend perfectly. A scent of his own, soap, vanilla, leather... What were they doing? It felt so right, yet so wrong. Without another moment of hesitation, he brought his lips to Dan's. They were soft and warm, nothing like anyone he had ever kissed before. And it wasn't sloppy either, just perfect. At first, it was fast, hungry, to repay for all of the lost time, but then, they slowed down. The both of them had all the time in the world. Now that their feelings were clear, more of those would come.
"I believe you." Dan said, pulling away, almost breathless. "We should do that more often."
Phil snickered and nodded in agreement, "We should."
I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Oooohhhhoohhhhohhooohhooohhooohoooh
They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will
"I should be going now. Some friends of mine invited me over," Dan said, hoping Phil would not think it was an excuse. Some family friends really did invite him over, and he didn't have much choice on whether he wanted to go or not, they were really insistent.
"Oh," Phil said, pretending not to care, but Dan knew him better than that.
"I'll be back soon. I promise."
"Then I'll wait for you," He grinned.
"Great," Dan grinned back.
"Great."
And with one last peck on his lips Dan took off, hoping he really would wait for him. His feelings for Phil were deeper than he thought. Or maybe than I hoped. Was what ran through his mind. Now that he knew how Phil felt, it would be harder to focus on anything until he felt his soft lips on his' again.
Wow, this sucks. But please review and favorite! I would be thankful! (And for someone who never had her first kiss, that kissing scene was pretty decent. I'm a loser, bye.)