Destati [ Awaken
Author – under.the.fateless.sky
Rating – PG-13 (tentatively for now)
Email – sakura. – I do not own Roswell, nor anything else I have borrowed fluffy little plot bunnies from. Roswell is owned by Jason Katims and all the others who hold copyrights to it. Please don't sue, I only have a piece of pocket fuzz to my name.

Author's Note – Just as a brief note, I am very, very new to the Roswell world. I have seen a lot of episodes, but I haven't seen all of them. I'm trying to do my research, but please bear with me as some things may not be accurate, plus it may be slightly OOC for a bit, and I've also not written a fanfic in literally years (I know, excuses excuses xD !!). And on one last note, just for disclaimer reasons, I'm also borrowing a couple plot lines from a couple other places (mostly from a game called Xenosaga, which draws from many Earth religions and myths). Enough of my babbling though, thank you very much for reading )

Chapter One – "And miles to go before I sleep…"

'It's funny how the world changes sometimes, how the streets you walked your entire life seem darker, colder. How the silence isn't so quiet anymore. How eyes you've barely even noticed now look at nothing but you. How the walk home every night is no longer routine, but a victory. And then you begin to wonder...maybe it's not the world that's changed. Maybe it's just you. And then, suddenly...you begin to wonder all over again.

My name is Liz Parker…and I've changed.

It's funny. I'd never given a thought to anything but my own routine. I miss that comfort sometimes, the comfort of familiarity. Where the only problems I had were figuring out that last nagging Geometry problem and how Maria and I were going to manage the Crashdown when the massive group of UFO fanatics came tumbling in during the festival as if we were the only restaurant in town.

But now, the carefully woven life I've made for myself is slowly coming apart, becoming more complex. Where there was light and certainty has been replaced by darkness, as if the light bulb has burnt out and I can't find my way out of the room.

It all started when Max Evans healed me. I had been accidentally shot during a fight between two men in the Crashdown. It turned violent as one of them pulled the gun out meaning to shoot the other, but it ended up straying and hitting me instead. Next thing I know, Max is above me, throwing a ketchup bottle on me and begging me not to say anything before he bolted out the door. Before I have a chance to ask what he meant, I looked down and realized my wound was healed. I confronted him about it…and that's when my life as a normal human girl ceased.

And I've never been the same since. Every time I look up at those stars, I wonder about the possibilities. How many worlds are there? Why are we on this one? What's our purpose for being here and why did the royal four end up on Earth out of any planet they could've crashed on? When I see the stars, twinkling off in the distance, I wonder if they're all woven together, intertwined. And now that I know other life exists elsewhere in the Universe I wonder if all of our lives are woven together too, if all life in the Universe shares the same destiny. We all share the same sky, so perhaps our purpose is the same too.

All I know is…I'll never be the same.'

…

Her gaze broke with the stars, and now Liz only blankly stared off into the night, her heart suddenly beginning to ache. She loved Max Evans, deeply, but she had pushed it aside upon learning that he was actually the King of his planet, Antar, and that he'd one day have to return and liberate his people. Not only that, his destiny didn't lie with her- it lie with his Queen, Tess, a girl Liz didn't trust as far as she could throw her. Nor did it help that she had Max's future self telling her that if they were to marry, the world would end. Tears welled up in Liz's eyes, the stars now beginning to look like an elaborate painting someone had smeared with their hands.

Liz wanted to go to him now, but she knew she couldn't. She couldn't stand in the way of what he had to be and couldn't sacrifice the Earth to her own selfish desires. And what was worse, she seemed to be losing all the people she really cared about. Grandma Claudia, Alex, and even Maria seemed to be drifting away. But the deepest wound had been to give up her soulmate. Fitfully, she moved onto her side, lying in the lounge chair she'd had outside her window on the roof. Curling up tightly against the cold air, she could feel sleep taking her, rescuing her from her thoughts.

Her dreams would not be as kind.

…

'In my dreams I'm dying all the time, I never meant to hurt you. In my dreams I'm jealous all the time, then I wake, I'm going out of my mind…'

Frail, bloody, and fading, Liz Parker held on for dear life to the only man she'd ever loved. Her weak hands struggled to put pressure on his injuries and stop the bleeding, but he had been wounded far too badly. "Liz…"

"Your highness…King Zan…I…"

Weakly, Zan managed to smile up at her through the sharp pains tearing through his body. "Liz…my lovely, beautiful Liz, everything is going to be alright."

Liz's face contorted with confusion, among the innocence and sadness that smeared it. "What're you talking about? You're dying…" Her eyes shut tightly in defiance when his breaths became more ragged and strained. "Please no…you can't…I need you." Frantically, she put more pressure on the wound, but the blood only pooled under her hand.

Reaching up, Zan gently placed his hand on her cheek, wiping away the tears. "I'm so glad…that I got to know you, and love you."

"Stop talking like that! You just said everything would be alright! Why?! Why did you sacrifice yourself for me?!", Liz screamed in panic more than anger.

"It was you. And I would gladly do it again. I would rather die here knowing you're safe than to know that I was living in a world without you in it."

"I don't even know who I am. I'm nobody…all I know is you and this world…please don't leave me…" She pleaded again, the desperation growing in her voice.

With his last strength, he pulled her shaking form down to him and kissed her softly. "Even if I die here now, and when I die again in the next life, and the one after that, my destiny will always be the same. You. I love…you." Zan managed before falling away and giving into the abyss.

Liz's eyes went wide with horror, her small frame clinging to him as if she could make this all go away by closing her eyes and praying really hard. But when she opened her eyes again, she finally knew and the denial she'd been clinging to ceased. He was gone.

A girl with straight pink hair emerged from the shadows, knelt down next to Liz and wrapped her arms around her shoulders in comfort. "It's okay. This is not the end. Always at the end of war is the opportunity to begin again. There will always be a future so long as there is hope."

…

Taking her gently in his arms, Max pulled Liz gently away from the side of the balcony and sat down on her makeshift bed, trying to console her still sleeping form. He rocked her softly, the sight of her crying breaking his heart. He was on his way over to try and talk to her about the fissure that seemed to be forming between them, when he'd heard her sobbing. Worried, he'd been up the wall faster than humanly possible to pull her back from the edge of her terror. Suddenly Max felt a sharp pang of guilt, fearing that maybe her nightmare was his fault. He knew from watching her over the past few days her dreams were anything but pleasant. He could see the silent misery in her eyes, and the dark circles that surrounded them. She hadn't taken the news of Tess and his heritage very well, even pushing him aside so she wouldn't get in his way. Even when he'd seen her in bed with Kyle, he couldn't bring himself to hate her. He wasn't even sure he believed that she'd slept with him.

No matter what she did, he couldn't get her iron grip off of his heart.

"Liz…please wake up. You're scaring me." He spoke softly as he cradled her against him.

"Please…don't leave me Zan…I don't wanna be alone…", she moaned fitfully.

Max froze. Liz had never called him by his former name.

His alien name.

Alarmed, he began to shake her more firmly. "Wake up! You're here, you're home. You're Liz Parker…it's Max…I'm right here…"

Liz's eyes snapped open, tears streaming down her face as her panic stricken eyes met Max's. "Max…I…you're…"

"It's okay baby, please calm down." Placing his hand on her cheek he wiped away her tears while she looked around, trying to make reality fall back into place.

She looked around at the brick walls of her house, the soft lights and candles that lit her blurry vision. Max, whose arms were wrapped around her, as if keeping her safe from all harm. She knew he shouldn't have been there, but right then, more than anything, she was glad he was. "But you died Max…in my arms…I watched you go."

"Liz, you're still dreaming." A knot of worry began to form in his stomach. He knew they were strained right now, but he also knew her well enough to know a dream like that would tear at her. Her use of his alien name worried him even further.

"But…I…" She watched as the bright lights of a car passed by down the street. "Wow. I guess I was.", she let her voice trail off.

Max stood up and wrapped the blanket she'd discarded in her sleep around her shoulders. "Let's get you inside. It's freezing out here."

She didn't argue and took Max's hand as he led her to her bed. Laying her head down, she let Max pull the blanket over her. He moved to kiss her instinctively, but stopped when he remembered the strained road their relationship was taking. Max began to move for the window before he lost himself in his worry for her when she grabbed his hand.

"Max, I know that we're…sorta off balance now…but that dream is really under my skin. And I know I shouldn't be asking you but…please stay? Until I fall asleep?" The plea in her eyes was clear, that for once Liz Parker was letting her heart take control instead of her head.

Unable to refuse her, Max nodded quietly and sat down on the floor next to her bed, his voice barely above a whisper. "Yeah, I'll be here. Sleep well, Liz."