Memories, Old and New
Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Battlestar Gallactica.
A/N: Any number of things they'd spoken about; so many they'd left unsaid. For whatever reason, Laura and Bill were now ready to go back into the past, to remember times when they were free to just be themselves.
A/N2: Enjoy! Please leave a review if y'all's feel so inclined. They are ever so lovely to read and much appreciated. #TodayIsLife
~~~~~PT~~~~~
So many events had taken place since Baltar became President and then again when Roslin regained the position. Any number of things they'd spoken about; so many they'd left unsaid. For whatever reason, Laura and Bill were now ready to go back into the past, to remember times when they were free to just be themselves.
The decision wasn't difficult for Laura, former President of the Twelve Colonies, to make. How to tell Bill seemed harder. With so many people going down to the surface to make a life on New Caprica, Laura figured they'd need teachers. She could run the school, teach and live a good enough life for however long their new home allowed. She knew it was a pit stop, not capable of sustaining life for long, and she admitted as much to Bill when she finally told him her plans. Though he understood, his face looked pained at the idea. Explaining that he had to stay on Galactica, he wished her well. Before she left his quarters, they gently kissed and she made him promise to visit her. He managed to get down there a few times before all hell broke lose.
As they sat down, Laura smiled at Bill. They were both nervous and the other could easily tell. Now that the time was at hand, he wasn't sure if he should continue what he'd started a few days before in the conference room.
"So," she prompted with a smile, "our time together on New Caprica."
"You in that red dress." Allowing himself to get lost in the memory, he took her hand in his. "You looked nice."
"Thank you and since I was wearing it when I got a little silly, I suppose you remember that also."
"Yeah, I do," he paused then his voice took on a serious tone, "you weren't silly."
As they were lying on the sand bags discussing the uncertainty of life, whether the Cylons would return or not, and enjoying the here and now, she'd managed to snuggle closer and closer into him. When she asked what he would do right then if he could do anything, he took a few moments to think before answering. Deciding she'd waited long enough for an answer, she softly kissed his neck. Hearing his reaction, she ran her tongue slowly down it only to kiss her way back up. Meeting no resistance, she kissed along his jaw, the corner of his mouth and finally covered his lips with her own. What began as a chaste, lingering kiss quickly became more passionate when he opened his mouth as soon as she requested entrance. Their moans escaped as their tongues danced and their hands roamed freely. He was settled between her legs, his hand running along her thigh when he realized they were grinding into one another.
He didn't know where the strength came from when he heard himself say they should probably stop. Reminding him she was just a teacher, she pulled him into another passionate kiss. When they stopped this time, her legs were wrapped around his waist. Lost in the moment, he replicated her previous actions along her neck. Locked in another passionate kiss afterwards, she arched into him as he began pushing her shirt up. It wasn't until then that he realized where their actions were leading and told her they needed to stop.
His marriage had taught him that he needed to be present for a relationship to work. They'd be separated until he could visit her. To him, that was unacceptable. Though she assured him she was fine with the arrangement, he couldn't get passed what it would mean. She was more than a frak and he wouldn't make her feel as if that's all she was to him. With a soft, lingering kiss to his closed mouth, she suggested they get some sleep; Baltar would surely have more things planned for the next day.
"I practically threw myself at you," she sighed.
"I responded," he reminded her.
"You did but you stopped." Though she smiled, her eyes didn't shine. "Always."
Moving closer to her, their hands still joined, "You're more than a frak, Laura." His voice was low, gentle and she knew he meant it. There had been an underlying tension between them for some time. Those visits of his to New Caprica just brought it temporarily to the surface.
Many weeks had gone by before he was able to visit her again. She took him up the mountain to the lake she'd told him about the last time. She saw the surprise on his face and desire in his eyes as she stripped down to her undergarments then suggested swimming or maybe racing if he felt competitive. Despite being meant as a thought, he muttered aloud that he was glad she hadn't suggested skinny dipping. Her laugh moved within him and he smiled the entire time as he stripped down to his boxers. Taking his hand, she led him to the water's edge to test the temperature. Deciding it was warm enough, they made their way in and began swimming lazily. At one point, he stood up, asking her to join him. Their lips were locked in a passionate kiss within seconds. Her legs wrapped around his waist as they became lost in each other.
To any passerby, they looked like lovers. Tom Zarek, for the most part, felt embarrassed for coming upon the scene but that small part of him that would always be on the lookout for the upper hand decided to keep the image in the back of his mind in case he ever needed it.
They raced after that until they were exhausted. Too exhausted, they hoped, to want anything more than to lie in the grass and rest in each other's arms. As it happened, their small pecks turned to lingering kisses and those always turned into passionate ones. The heat spread throughout their bodies and, without thinking, he moved her bra out of the way. When she arched up into him, his tongue swirled her nipple before he mouthed her breast, the same one that was once taking her from him. Repeating his actions on the other had her legs wrapped around his waist as she breathlessly asked him not to stop. Her words had the opposite effect, however, as his ability for rational thought kicked in. They lay down and held each other until they dried off enough to get redressed.
"I wanted you," he softly admitted.
Caressing his cheek with the back of her fingers, she made it very clear where she stood on the subject. "You could've had me."
"When I visited," he said in a tone tinged with sadness and regret though he had often said he regretted nothing.
Assuming he was thinking of his marriage and the lessons it taught him, she didn't pursue the topic.
The next time he visited, she took him through the market they had set up and showed him around the one-room school where she taught. Her excitement was catching and he found himself laughing with her often. That night, as they kissed on her mattress, he told her she was the only one aside from Tigh who made him laugh that much. When their kisses heated up again and she wanted more, she stopped him. The idea was to save him from having to do it himself yet again.
"It was getting more difficult," he admitted.
"I tried to make it easier for you to spend time with me. I didn't want you to worry about that."
His hand moved into her hair as he kissed her cheek. "I didn't want to stop."
"You didn't have to," she reminded him, "I was more than willing."
"I had to." He thought of adding more but didn't.
The last time he visited her before the Cylons came back, they greeted each other with a kiss that had them both glad they were already in her tent. They had a late dinner and went to sleep. He had to return to Galactica early the next day for one emergency or another. The girl was old; she needed any number of repairs.
"I knew it was more," she murmured as she moved closer.
His eyes held hers and he gave her the truth she'd never asked for in all that time out of respect for his sense of privacy. "You made me want to stay."
"I didn't ask you to do that," she stated softly yet firmly.
"No, you didn't." He trailed his hand along her arm. "I wanted to share your tent." He pecked her lips. "I wanted to build your cabin."
Moving even closer to him, she gave him a soft, lingering kiss. "I understood why you couldn't leave Galactica. There was no pressure." Before he could respond, she added, "I'm glad you wanted to stay. I don't feel silly now."
"That was never my intention, Laura." He kissed her softly. "You were more than a frak." He wasn't quite ready to admit anything more to her or to himself even but he was aware he had deeper feelings than friendship for her lurking beneath the surface.
"I knew that, Bill," she murmured before kissing him again. This time she sought and received entrance and it was as if time hadn't passed at all.
"I left," he sighed.
"I always knew you'd come back. I never doubted that." Her voice held a confidence of which he didn't feel worthy.
"My first reaction was to leave." He sounded miserable.
"Lee's first reaction was to leave. You followed his advice after you thought of the consequences to the fleet if you stayed." She'd heard the stories by then. She knew who thought what, who fought who and that Adama had decided on his own he had to go back. The crew that remained with him on that mission were loyal and brave and would follow the Admiral into battle any day.
"Most of humanity was down on New Caprica." He was still dealing with his decision to leave. Going back was the right thing to do.
"We made that choice. We never asked you to support it, not really." She shrugged. "I know you didn't want me down there." Her finger traced his jaw then trailed over his lips. "You never said that to me but I knew."
"The kids needed you to teach them." He knew that; knew how much teaching meant to her. He saw the passion in her eyes when she spoke of their lessons and how they were all so intelligent in their own ways, all so eager to learn. He wondered if she realized how much she spoke of that part of her life back then; if she knew how her face lit up when she was just a teacher.
"It was where I needed to be then." She thought of her next words before speaking them. "I would've shared it all with you."
"I know," he rasped before kissing her again. By the time they moved apart, she was straddling him. Discussing the past was bringing back feelings long since buried. Now they were bubbling to the surface. If they really thought about it, those feelings seemed even stronger than before because, since her return, they had continued to get closer.
His fingers moved along her thighs and up her back as hers moved through his hair, traced the shell of his ear or rested on his shoulders.
"We would've made love," she whispered before claiming his mouth again. Untucking her blouse quickly, he slid his hands under, covering her breasts. He had missed her, had missed this part of their relationship, more than he realized. They both had.
As she moved on him, he felt his ability to resist her begin to fade. Lying them both down, settling between her legs which quickly wrapped around his waist, he unbuttoned her blouse. Between kisses, he tried to bring them back to reality. "You're the President," he breathed out before sucking on her pulse point.
Moaning from the sensations, her body on fire, she husked, "With you, I'm just Laura." Moaning, arching into him as his tongue swirled and he fully mouthed her breast, she repeated, "I'm just Laura and you're just Bill."
Suddenly he moved away from her, an odd look in his eyes. "You need to see Cottle," he advised, his voice full of concern.
"Why?" She hadn't checked herself in a while but she had gone to see the doctor upon her return from New Caprica and she was fine.
Rather than speak, he took her hand and placed it on her breast. She felt it and immediately moved away from him. Standing up, her back to him, she buttoned her blouse and tucked it in as she paced small circles.
"Not again," she murmured, then finally turned to face him. Unsure what to do while she dealt with this new development, he had remained seated on the couch. "Not again," she repeated as she held her hand out to him.
Standing up, he wrapped his arms around her. Regardless of their titles, they were friends; friends who only a few minutes ago were completely lost in their growing passion. "You'll see Cottle?" He was sure she would but needed to hear it.
"I will," she instantly reassured him.
"You'll let him treat you? With more than that damn Kamala?" He wondered if he was pushing his luck but he didn't care. He didn't want her to die. If he was more honest with himself, he'd be able to admit he didn't want to lose her.
After thinking about it, she agreed. "I'll let Dr Cottle treat me." Looking up, she held his gaze firmly. "But, Bill, do you know what you're asking?"
"I'm asking you to fight, Laura, to live." His voice was low; it held a sadness he didn't want her to hear.
"The cure is worse than the cancer," she sighed.
"If you have it again," he soothed. Pulling her back into his embrace, he quietly asked, "You'll tell me?"
"You'll be the first one to know this time," she promised. The look on his face, the sadness in his eyes was too much for her. She kissed him hard, passionately, and let the heat build up again. They knew they had to stop. She was the President but in that moment, their connection was more important.
"I'll be there for you, Laura," he promised in a voice lower than she'd ever heard. "Every step of it, through it all."
"I know, Bill," she smiled. Moving away from him, she sat back down on the couch. Sighing, she rubbed the bridge of her nose. "I'm the President." She didn't say anything more.
"We'll figure it out once we know." The idea of we came so easily to him.
Neither wanted it to be true but both believed it was. She'd have a battle ahead of her but, if she let him in, she wouldn't have to fight it alone. This time he'd be a part of her journey. Because, if he was more honest with himself, he'd admit he didn't want to lose her or their ever-growing relationship. Titles be damned if she was sick again. The idea of her dying hurt him down deep in his core.
"We'll figure it all out," she repeated, her head resting in the palm of her hand. Moving over to snuggle with him again, she promised, "I'll fight, Bill, for as long as I can."
The end of her statement concerned rather than reassured him. It was more than she'd done the first time around so he would take it. There was always a chance the cancer wasn't back, he consoled himself.
"Stop thinking, Bill," she attempted to tease, "I have."
"Don't wait too long, Laura." Seeing her eyebrow quirk, he kissed her forehead. "I'm done," he promised her, "for now," he whispered to himself.
[The End]