Life's Little Lessons (A Christmas Story)
By: Katalina Ginn
Warnings: Lime scented, Yaoi-full, kinda Fluffish, can cause Tooth decay from excessive sweetness, extreme HUMOR alert!, blushing Heero! (dun ask, just read)
At the Gundam safe house
Quatre slipped quietly into the living room, careful to make sure no one saw him. To his relief, he could see no one. Good. He headed cheerfully toward the fireplace, where the five stockings hung, already partially filled.
The whole thing had been Duo's idea. Each Gundam pilot had a stocking, and a mission. They had to find something to fill the stockings with before Christmas day. But there was one catch.
The stocking stuffers had to be as close to the same as possible. As in, if you put it one stocking, you had to put it in all of them. He said it was so no one would feel left out, but Quatre suspected it was actually a ploy to force Heero to actually buy him a gift, and not just stick a little treat in a stocking.
Still, it was a cute idea. And it had been more than a challenge to find something that would be both special to his love, and appropriate for the other three pilots.
Unable to stop himself from smiling, Quatre placed a small slip of paper in each of the stockings. When he came to his own stocking, he paused. Duo had made it quite clear that there was to be no peeking but who would know if he just took a quick peek...
"When I said no peeking, it meant don't peek, Quatre."
Quatre jumped a good foot into the air. "Duo! I... I didn't see you in here... I was just, um..." he stuttered, embarrassed.
The American grinned from across the room. "And that surprises you? No one ever sees me if I don't want them to."
"Obviously," Quatre murmured under his breath. Aloud, he said, "So, uh... Who's yet to accomplish their mission? That can't be all of us." He shot a look to the still partially unfilled stockings.
Duo frowned. "Me. I never thought it could be so difficult to find stupid stocking stuffers when I started this. I only wanted Heero to-" he blinked, and Quatre hid a smile. "Err... I mean, I only wanted to make sure everyone go something." Duo laughed nervously, watching Quatre's reaction.
Quatre decided to leave it alone. Better to let him have his fun. "Ah. I see. But surely you're not the only one. They look so... empty. And tomorrow's Christmas, too."
As if on cue, Trowa walked in with a paper bag in one arm. When he noticed he was not alone, he stopped. "Oh, I'm sorry. Am I interrupting anything?" He casually slid the bag out of view, despite the fact that both Quatre and Duo had seen it clearly.
Quatre smiled warmly. "Not at all. We were just..." Quatre paused, suddenly realizing he had no available excuse.
Thankfully, Duo did. "We were just discussing what I should get for the mission. Got any good ideas, Trowa?" Duo winked at Quatre, who sighed a silent thanks.
"Sorry, Duo. The only idea I could think of is taken now." Trowa risked a glance at the stockings, then fixed his gaze back on Quatre.
Quatre smiled warmly, taking the hint. "Hmm. Well, I guess we could go to the mall, Duo. Surely you can find something there. But we'd better go now. The last minute rush is bound to be pretty bad."
"Ok. But if we do find anything, you're not allowed to tell. Not even your lover boy over there." Duo shot Quatre a sly look as the blonde turned bright red. Trowa, as usual, showed no reaction, but the corners of his mouth did twitch a bit (much to Quatre's delight).
"Be careful. The traffic will be pretty bad. It would probably put a damper on Christmas if you got hurt out there today." Trowa picked his bag back up, purposely turning away while his angel tried hopelessly not to smile or blush further in his presence.
Somehow Quatre managed to squeak out an "Ok," through his embarrassment, and went hurriedly for the car. Duo watched silently as the Arabian boy disappeared out the door, his smiling falling just a bit. He instantly scolded himself for doing so. Jealousy was not meant for the holiday season...
At a nearby mall
The mall was a madhouse. Literally. People rushed everywhere, desperate to finish their shopping before the stores closed and it was too late. It made the many battles the Gundams had fought in look sane and organized.
It took all of one minute for Duo to get separated from Quatre. But that was no big deal. They had expected as much, and agreed to meet back at the car when they were finished.
Duo wandered from store to store, finding nothing of interest. With only 30 minutes left before the mall closed, he was beginning to get discouraged. This had been his idea. What would Heero think of him if he were the only one to fail the mission? When it was his idea to begin with?!
Now depressed, Duo noticed a smallish store in a corner that seemed to be less crowded than the others. Wanting out of the frantic crowd, he made his way over to it.
The store was one of the many little 'everything's-a-dollar' stores that no one ever bothered to look in. Just the place a depressed Gundam could use to get some breathing room. With no real goal in mind, Duo began browsing the isles.
He was halfway down his third isle when he saw a small display, virtually untouched. Curious, he walked over. The sign read "The How To Collection: Life's Little Lessons for the inexperienced, clueless, and/or lonely."
Duo couldn't help but laugh. Clueless and lonely; you couldn't find a better description for him right now. Absently, he picked one up and read the title.
How To Book #7: The First Kiss. Duo blinked, a smile beginning to grow on his lips. Was this some sort of joke? Surely this couldn't be real...
Opening it, he flipped through the pages, scanning the contents. With each page, his smile grew wider. Someone up there was looking out for him. These books were made for the Gundams.
He browsed through the pile of books and found that there were many interesting titles among them. In a matter of moments, he had five selected that were perfect for his cause. Whistling to himself, he headed for the checkout counter.
Quatre was already in the car when Duo arrived. He put his bag in the trunk, and flopped happily in the passengers seat.
Quatre smiled. "I take it you found something?"
"Yeah." He grinned. "As Heero would say, Ninmu kanryou."
Back at the safe house
"Wufei, come on! You can't leave yet! Aren't you gonna even look in your stocking?!" Duo planted himself between the slightly annoyed Asian and the door.
"I can do that later, Maxwell. Right now I have an important appointment to keep. Get out of my way." Wufei glared at the braided wonder in an attempt to intimidate him, but Duo only grinned.
"An important appointment? As in, a date?" Duo teased. Wufei fumed, reaching for his dagger, but Duo continued. "Is it with Sally?"
"NO!" The dagger was instantly implanted in the wall next to Duo's head, but Duo was unaffected. "I would never go anywhere with that onna!"
"Then it's not important enough to miss Christmas morning here." Duo said firmly. "Go sit down. And stop glaring at me like that. You know it doesn't work. Go." Wufei glared daggers at the American, ready to kill him.
"Wufei, please at least stay until we can open the stockings. Then you can go to your... appointment. Gifts don't require everyone to be here, so if you want to leave then, I'm sure Duo won't mind, will you, Duo?" Quatre took his place on the couch, giving the two fuming Gundams his best smile.
Duo frowned, but nodded. "Yeah, I guess." Casually pulling Wufei's dagger out of the wall and tossing it to him, Duo made his way towards Heero. Seeing this, Heero sat in one of the armchairs so Duo could not get next to him.
Wufei smirked, and for a moment Quatre feared that Duo would do more than just fix a death glare on the Asian. But he shrugged it off, instead gathering the now full stockings from the mantle. Wufei sat on the floor, as far from Duo's spot by the fireplace as he could manage. Trowa casually sat on the other end of the couch, bringing a slight tint to Quatre's cheeks.
Sporting his infamous grin, Duo passed out the stockings and took his seat as well. For a rather comical moment, everyone waited, no one wanting to be the first to open his. Finally, Heero broke the silence by glaring at Duo. "This was your idea. You go first."
"Whatever you say, Heero." Duo said with a grin, which only earned him a meaner glare. Pouting slightly, Duo reached in and pulled out the first thing he touched.
It was a small piece of paper, shaped like a coupon. Reading it, Duo suddenly grinned full force, shooting Quatre a look. Quatre laughed softly, acknowledging Duo's thanks, and held up another identical slip, letting his gaze fall sheepishly on Trowa.
Everyone else watched in complete confusion. Trowa was probably the most confused of all. Why would Duo smile at Quatre like that? And what was on that paper that could make Quatre blush like that?
Heero voiced this apparently popular question. "What are you so happy about, baka?"
Duo stopped laughing and planted an absolutely seductive grin on his love. "Why don't you see for yourself, Heero? I believe the rule was 'if one person gets it, everyone does'."
Heero shifted under Duo's gaze, feeling suddenly warm. He reached in his own stocking, but before he found the slip of paper, he encountered a small book. He pulled it out, and his eyes abruptly grew twice the normal size.
How To Book #10: Loving Your Lover. Duo suddenly blushed, looking anywhere but in his crush's eyes. Heero allowed himself a small smile, and opened the little book.
Wufei, unable to see the title of the book from his position, reached in his own stocking. But he touched neither book nor paper first. Instead, he pulled out a small picture frame.
Trowa noticed his puzzled expression. "Wufei, I'm sorry, but I was not sure what to put in yours, so I left it blank. I hope you can find something to put in it." Wufei nodded, thinking actually of two certain someone's he could put in it... But then he couldn't let anyone see it, or they'd cry treason...
"What did you put in mine?" Quatre asked, reaching for his own. When he pulled it out, though, idle curiosity melted into adoration. Trowa smiled, and reached for his own so he could show Quatre, but instead found a small figurine.
He realized a moment later it was a replica of Heavyarms. Wufei smiled proudly from his spot, holding up his own figurine of Altron. "Wufei, I didn't know you were so creative. These are cool!" Duo fingered the fake scythe on his figurine, nodding in approval.
Noticing that something had been discovered from each pilot except Heero, Trowa carefully dumped the contents of his stocking onto the table in front of him. Before he found Heero's gift, though, he noticed his own little book. Picking it up, his one visible eye widened slightly.
About the same time Quatre found his. Glancing at the title, he found himself staring in disbelief at Duo, who grinned. Trowa peered over Quatre's shoulder to see if his was the same, and was mildly surprised at the title. How To #7: The First Kiss.
"I would suggest you read that soon, little one," he whispered softly to Quatre, who blushed terribly.
"Is yours the same, Trowa?" He asked carefully, daring to meet his gaze.
"No, but just as useful I think." He smiled, and handed his to Quatre.
Quatre blinked in complete disbelief. How To #23: For Yaoi Supporters.
While Quatre recovered from his shock, Trowa looked again for Heero's gift. His eyes fell a slip of paper, like the one's Duo and Quatre had had earlier. Unfolding it, Trowa felt himself smile despite all his guards against such things.
The paper, or rather, coupon, read: "This coupon is good for one FREE KISS from the person of your choice. Valid only for eternity; No refunds or exchanges."
Meanwhile, Duo had also realized that he'd seen nothing from Heero in anyone's stocking. He dumped his stocking out as well, but found nothing that someone hadn't already uncovered. He did, however, find his picture frame.
Turning it over, he blinked in pure amazement. Staring back at him was a picture of Heero. And he was actually smiling. But even more amazing than the fact that Heero Yuy was smiling, was the rest of the picture. He was smiling at Duo, asleep on the couch.
Heero glanced away from Quatre and Trowa's little love fest just in time to see the tears well up in Duo's eyes. But he was not sad; no, he was holding a little picture frame to his chest, smiling blissfully as tears ran from his tightly closed eyes.
Heero rose, fully intent on discovering what could cause that sort of reaction, when another idea occurred to him. Dumping his stoking, his picked up his picture frame...
...And sat back down rather hard as his legs gave beneath him. In his picture, he had fallen asleep at his computer, and Duo was admiring him lovingly from his perch on the couch. The look in Duo's eyes there... He'd wanted it for so long...
Thoroughly sick of the increasingly lovey-dovey atmosphere, Wufei stood to leave. As he stood, however, he dumped his own stocking, revealing his little book. Mildly curious after catching a glimpse of Quatre's, Wufei turned it over to read the title.
How To #43: Defeating Shyness in the Bedroom. Wufei practically choked when he read it. "Maxwell? How...?!"
Duo shook himself out of his trance, and gave Wufei a surprisingly evil grin. "How did I know? I am Shinigami, Chang Wufei. I make it my business to know." He brightened a bit then. "Oh, you can go on to your little appointment now. I hope that," he nodded at the book, "comes in handy for you."
Wufei shot him a dirty look, but he was smiling. "Perhaps your not an idiot after all, Maxwell." With that, he left, taking the little book with him.
"Do I even want to know what his said?" Quatre toned, curling deeper into Trowa's arms.
Duo laughed. "No, I doubt it. Besides, I don't think you'll need that one." He allowed his gaze to drift to the arms around the Arab's waist, then deliberately to Heero.
Heero quickly hid his picture from Duo's curious gaze, resuming his uncaring expression. Masking disappointment, Duo reached for his own little book. "You might use mine, though. I've already read it. Nothing I didn't already know. Besides, I don't think I'll need it anyway." On the last his smile fell clearly, gaining Heero's full attention.
Turning around, Duo began gathering his things together. He tossed the book in Quatre's general direction, not bothering to look in his obvious disappointment. So he didn't see that Heero had risen and snatched the book neatly out of the air before it reached Quatre. Glancing at the title, though, Heero tossed it to the blonde.
A firm hand stopped Duo from rising with his things. He looked up, but did not smile at Heero. "You didn't get anything." He said softly, looking down again.
"You didn't look hard enough. It would have died in the stocking." Heero replied flatly, gently forcing Duo's gaze to the ceiling.
Duo blinked, not at all believing what he saw. Quatre and Trowa looked as well, then grinned to one another.
Positioned exactly above Duo was a small piece of mistletoe. Not the fake kind either; genuine live mistletoe. Somehow Heero had managed to predict exactly where Duo would sit, and had hung the mistletoe right above that spot.
Duo swallowed rather hard, quivering despite his best efforts. "But Heero... The rule was..."
"He didn't break the rule, Duo." Trowa said softly from the couch. Duo frowned at him, ready to object, when Trowa held up a similar piece of mistletoe. So did Quatre. "He simply insured that yours would remain alive. Our are plastic, so there was no danger in putting them in the stocking."
"But when you dumped it out, that wasn't-" !?!?! He stopped in mid sentence when Heero settled in next to him, slipping his arms tightly around the American's waist. He looked, still unbelieving, from Heero's arms, to his face, and back again.
Leaning forward, Heero rested his head against his love's, delighted when Duo quivered nervously. "They're very light, and the leaves are pointed. It would stick to the inside of a stocking easily."
"So you planned this all along, didn't you Heero? I should've known." Duo laughed softly, finally relaxing into Heero's embrace. "I guess you think you can predict my every move, don't you?"
"Probably."
"Well, then, did you predict this?" He suddenly slipped free from Heero's grasp, surprising everyone. Reaching into his pocket, he withdrew a small slip of paper. Quatre and Trowa laughed as Heero blinked in confusion. Heero had never looked at his own coupon. He had no idea what Duo was up to.
Heero took the coupon with a mild frown. He was not exactly happy that Duo would pull away from him like that, no matter what the reason...
Shock numbed Heero's body as he read the paper. Duo stood and waited, albeit somewhat anxiously, for Heero to regain the ability to think clearly. He had caught Heero Yuy completely off guard. That alone was an accomplishment.
A few moments passed, but Heero did not move. Curious, and somewhat hurt, Duo leaned down to see if his love was OK, and was shocked to find tears in the cobalt gems he treasured so much.
"Heero? Ogenki desu ka?" He cautiously reached out and touched Heero's face, tilting it up so their eyes met. Heero's expression was a mix of fear, doubt, and failure; a surprising change from his normally stoic behavior.
Quatre, seeing this, silently motioned to Trowa that they should leave the two alone. Trowa nodded, both grateful that he could escape the increasingly tense situation and that he would have the chance to be alone with Quatre at last...
Duo did not notice their departure. A thousand questions filled his mind. Had not only a moment ago Heero pinned him under the mistletoe? So why did asking for what Heero had apparently wanted cause his love to fall into despair? It was almost as if...
The truth hit Duo so suddenly he could not stop a small laugh from escaping. Heero instantly looked back up, confused and hurt by Duo's sudden amusement. How could he laugh? There was no humor here. And how could he ever tell Duo... without hurting his feelings?
"Heero, will you answer a question for me?" Duo's tone was almost conversational, a warm smile on his face that seemed to extend into his pretty violet eyes.
"Nani?" Heero almost growled back. He just dropped it, just like that! Didn't he want it, too?
"Have you ever kissed anyone before?" When shock and slight embarrassment rippled across Heero's face, Duo knew he had found his answer. He closed his eyes, smiling. So the "perfect soldier" was perfect after all. He almost felt guilty for knowing he would be the one to corrupt Heero's purity.
Almost.
"Well now, there is a surprise. Something the perfect soldier doesn't know how to do." Heero glared daggers at Duo, but that only made him smile seductively. Heero's glare faltered. "That is simply unacceptable." Duo continued, mocking disapproval. "What do you have to say for yourself, Heero Yuy?"
"Suki da, Shinigami." Duo's mouth dropped open with amazement. He... Likes me?! He likes me!
Heero carefully leaned forward, pulling Duo to him and pressing their lips together. Although the kiss was unskilled and light, Duo still shivered in pleasure.
"Well?" Heero said softly, gauging Duo's reaction.
The latter grinned devilishly. "Not bad for a beginner, but..."
"But?"
Duo's grin widened. "You're going to have to do better than that if you want to keep your reputation as perfect. This is how to do it, Hee-chan." With that he pulled a slightly surprised Heero to him, gently caressing his face before allowing their lips to meet once more.
Heero's eyes widened when he felt Duo's tongue slip past his lips and into his mouth. His kiss was passionate, yet gentle enough that Heero was not overwhelmed by it. At least, not entirely.
"Heero?"
"Nani?"
"I like you, too."
Heero stared for a moment. Then, much to Duo's amazement, he blushed. "Ai... Ai shiteru, Shinigami."
Duo smiled sweetly. "Ai shiteru, Heero. Merry Christmas."
And so that night Heero Yuy finally learned how to kiss... as well as many other things.
-end-
Author's note: I simply couldn't resist! Having Heero be the clueless one just made it that much sweeter! Merry Christmas everybody!