Title:My Dysfunctional Family
Chapter 1: Dysfunctional Stapler
Summary: Not very good at summary's. But, my friends and me are in it. So enjoy. Oh! This story is mostly just for fun, it doesn't have much for a plot, might be some pairings but I'm still not sure.
Story: Ok. Welcome to the story. My name is Kai, and when I say dysfunctional family, I don't mean, mom, dad, brother, sister, grandma, etc. I mean me and my friends…and the boys. And no. We're not married or dating, this was our parent's idea. You see, my mom and her friends and my dad and his friends lived in the same house that me and my friends are currently living in, you know what happened? They ended up married. My mom and dad met here, and so did everyone else's parents.
There are five of us, me and four of my friends, then five boys. We live in a split house. The main floor is the girl's floor, which has the kitchen, dinning room, three bedrooms, about two bathrooms and a small study. The next floor usually would be considered a basement, but not in one of these houses. The boys have that floor. It has a TV room, three bedrooms, about two bathrooms, the laundry room and a small library. There's more but I can't think of it.
Now, my parent's as well as their friends, decided to put their daughters and sons in one house, which would be us. For example, my dad's friend is Inutashio; one of his sons was chosen to live here with us. I already know both since my parents were often busy and Suzuki (Inutashio's wife) would watch me and her sons. Anyway, back to explaining the story.
I'll introduce the boys first. Since I mentioned Intashio's sons, I might as well tell you which one is living here first. It's the older one, Sesshomaru. In his demon form he has long silver hair and golden eyes. A blue crescent moon on his forehead, two maroon stripes on his cheeks and wrists. Yes, I said demon, we both have human forms and demon forms. Oopps, did I say we, oh well, I'll explain that part later. Now, he also has a human form, which he uses when he leaves the house. All our families know about him and me.
Now, Sesshomaru can be very cold at times. Him and me are constantly at each other's throats; we fight who knows how many times a day. He's been nice a few times, but those are very rare times. And he pretty much keeps to himself, not always, but usually. From what my friends say, him and me are opposites, and apparently, from what Neko keeps telling me. Opposites attract. Every time she says that, I chase her around the house. Anyways, on with the next person.
Miroku. He has short black hair that he keeps in a small ponytail, his eyes are blue. He's human, but he's a very perverted human. He'll grope any beautiful girl and ask them to bare his child. But, he's really flirty around my friend Kiko. I've even seen her blush a few times. He can be smart at times, and he knows a lot, but not much about girls.
Next we have Sasuke. He has black hair, it looks dark blue though and dark eyes, I can't tell if they're black or blue, sometimes they look black, others they look blue. I think it's the lighting. Now, he's really mysterious. And tends to keep to himself. He and Sesshomaru are very competitive. With me and Sesshomaru we fight, and sometimes can get physical. Sasuke and Sesshy usually get competitive when they're playing sports or something like that. Oh, and my friend Neko has a huge crush on him, and we all know about it even Sasuke does. Neko doesn't know that we all know though.
I'll give you a really short version of how it happened. Ok, Neko was in the dinning room doing homework when apparently she fell asleep. Now, Sasuke walked into the kitchen to get something to eat when he heard snoring noises. He went into the dinning room and saw Neko fast asleep, mumbling something in her sleep. Then she said it. She said, "I love you Sasuke. I've always liked you, and now I know that you like me to." Those were her exact words. So we all eventually found out.
Who else is there..? Oh yeah, Shikamaru. He has brown hair pulled into a high messy ponytail. His eyes are a dark brown, I think…that's how they look, and it could be the lights. Anyway. He can be negative sometimes, but he's not a bad guy. In fact, he was actually one of the smartest kids in school; he's just not very motivated. And he's lazy to. You'll usually see him hanging out with Miroku, talking to him you know. He tends to keep out of any arguments that are going on. He'll just get up and leave. Shikamaru's pretty easy to talk to sometimes. Usually around Naru, he's pretty positive. Quite funny actually. Oh, and one more thing. Never call him Shika-chan. He hates it. It bugs him to know end, that's why it's fun to call him that.
Lastly is Garra. He's just creepy. He has short red hair and teal eyes with black eyeliner I guess it is. He also has a tattoo that symbols love, which I find odd, but his name also means death or blood or something like that. We all pretty much keep our distance from him. He's out a lot. And he has these glares that…I can't even think about them. The only one that you'll see around him is my friend Usagi. Garra's almost always in a bad mood, but then again, so is Usagi. The have some things in common to.
Now that you've met the boys, it's time for my friends and me. Since I said something earlier. Might as well do me. Ok, so as I've said, my name is Kai. I'm about 5'7". I'm also a half-demon, my mother's an Inu demon and my dad's a human. Yes, demons are still around, we just have disguises. Anyway, my half-demon form looks like this. I have long wavy black hair down to my waist with night sky blue ends, and is kept in a braid. My eyes are a violet mixed with silver color. And yes, I do have little black ears on my head, and I don't want no body touching them, I get enough of that from Neko. Anywho, I have a black crescent moon on my forehead, and a dark blue stripe with a jagged end on my right cheek and another blue stripe on my left eye. It starts at the middle of my eyebrow and goes down to my cheekbone. My human form, I'll tell you later when I'm in that form. As I've said. Everyone in the house knows so there's no need to hide it.
I'm quiet, but stubborn as hell. Well, that's what my friends say anyway. And when someone makes me mad, watch out. I don't tend to say bad things or swear, but when I'm mad, my mouth takes over and leaves my head in the dust.
Next is my friend Naru. She's 5'9". She has dark brown hair with some black added in it, it's a little more than shoulder length and she has light brown eyes. She's a good friend but can be protective sometimes, especially of her friends. She can get mad when she doesn't have enough sleep to. And is very loud and out spoken. Naru can also get a little violent sometimes to, but only when someone pisses her off which is not hard to do.
My next friend is Kiko. She's 5'6". She has straight mid-back brown hair with blond streaks. Her eyes are green. She's the mature one of us. She's smart and knows a lot. She's nice to, but can be a little scary every now and then. She's the one that Miroku acts really flirty around. And she's got a great punch. Kiko's really good with kids and has a big family. She's the one that pretty much keeps this place from being destroyed. You'll see. She's defiantly the mature one of the group.
My third friend is Usagi. She is 5'4". She has blonde hair of different blondes, with light blue eyes. She's often moody and has many mood swings, so it's hard to keep track of her. She loves to draw and is very good at it. She's the hyper one and can sometimes be a ditz. Usagi usually gets mad at everyone else for her problems, but, when she's not in a bad mood, she's pretty nice. She spends most of her time drawing or even talking to Garra who actually talks back.
And lastly is Neko. She is 5'6". She has red, blonde, light orange and some pink mixed into her hair. It's long, down to mid back and flips at the ends. Her eyes are normally bluey-green, but sometimes they change color depending on her mood. I remember one time, her eyes went red cause she got mad, I forget why, but boy was she angry. Neko is also a black belt in martial arts, which she has been taking classes since she was seven years old. She's probably the least mature one. Neko's really nice and hyper when she has too much caffeine or sugar. She's the one with the crush on Sasuke. She's really easy to talk to. But, she's not the smartest person in the world. It's not that Neko's dumb, it's just that she does dumb things…like the stapler incident. I'll tell you about that later.
There are a few more things I need to clear up. Sleeping arrangements. For my friends and me. We have three bedrooms and five of us. But, Usagi isn't the best person in the morning, snores like crazy, she's unorganized and not one of us wanted to share a room with her. We decided that she would have her own room. Me and Kiko share the second room, and Naru and Neko share the last one. The boys also have three bedrooms. No one wanted to share with Garra, but he didn't want to share with anyone either, so he got his own room, Miroku and Sesshy shared a room and then Sasuke and Shikamaru.
Now, for school and jobs. Only a few of us go to university, everyone else has a job already. Me, Sesshomaru, Neko, Sasuke and Naru go to the same university. The school day starts at eight thirty in the morning and ends at three thirty in the afternoon. I may have forgotten to mention our ages so I'll just add those in. Neko and Sasuke are in their last year of school, which is the forth year. Neko is now about twenty and Sasuke is twenty turning twenty-one in a few months. Neko wishes to be a professional hairstylist. Sasuke said that he wanted to be some kind of agent, he didn't say anything else. They have a math for everyday life course together and…I think that's the only one. Oh! And they also have a business course together to.
Naru is in her second year of school. She's about seventeen, turning eighteen next year. She does have some friends, but they don't ever come over to our house. For good reason. Naru hasn't told us what she wants to do yet. I don't even know if she knows what she wants to do.
Me and Sesshy are in our third year. We have science, history and a special gym class for those who want to stay in shape, learn how to fight, like martial arts, or for those who want to go into a job that will need this information. You see, Sesshomaru wants to be a bodyguard and/or assassin. I want to work for the CSI or FBI. Either works. I'm about eighteen, turning nineteen in the summer, right now it's fall, the start of a new school year. And Sesshomaru's nineteen. So he shoud be a year ahead of me, but he stayed an extra year in high school for extra credits.
Next for everyone else. Miroku is twenty-three, and works in an antic shop. He's paid well, and works during the day from nine in the morning till four in the afternoon, and on weekends, he doesn't work. Our parents planned it that way. Kiko is twenty-one and works in a daycare center. Where she also helps out kids with speech and/or mental and physical problems. She works on weekdays from eight in the morning till about five, five thirty in the evening. Kiko doesn't work on weekends either.
Shikamaru doesn't have a job. He did at one point, but he just stopped going to it. He's nineteen. He was out of school early because he skipped most of the grades since he's so smart. I don't remember what his job used to be since he hasn't gone to it for…quite a few months. So, he's home all the time and sometimes goes out. Next we have Usagi. She's twenty. She works with computer graphics. Making new video games, almost anything like that. She works from eight in the morning till five in the afternoon. On weekdays of course. Doesn't work on weekends though she's often drawing in her spare time, which she has lots of.
Lastly is Garra. Now, we don't know his age, but I would guess that he's between twenty and twenty-five. We also don't know what he does. He's gone most of the night everyday, even weekends, and is barely seen during the day. So as you can see, he's not one who talks about himself, or reveals anything.
Ok, now that that's done, why don't I tell you about the stapler incident. But I have to be quick; Neko would kill me if she found out. So, let's see what happened through the magic of flashbacks.
FlashbackIt was a beautiful Sunday afternoon. Joy, tomorrow's school. Everyone is off doing their own thing. Kiko is visiting her family. Garra's out somewhere, he didn't say where. Miroku's in his room looking over some job interviews for the antic shop. I haven't seen Usagi, Naru, or Sasuke. Shikimaru's still sleeping, surprise surprise. Neko's in her room doing homework. Sesshomaru… I have no idea. So, there's just me.
Now, for something relaxing. I was busy with a school report all day Saturday. Stupid teacher, stupid project. It was for history, we had to pick a topic and explain its significance. I picked the Shikon No Toma. Sesshomaru's in my class, and he wouldn't help me. Not even a little bit. So, I was working almost all day, yesterday, and most of the night. Now's the time to relax.
I've decided to read a book that I am currently reading. Dragon Rider. It's really good. I'm on the ninth chapter. I walked out of my room, and down the hall.
When you first walk in the house, there's a hall, and a staircase, which leads to the basement or the boy's floor. Down the hall is the kitchen, which has a door that leads to the dinning room. On the other side of the kitchen, is the small study. It has a computer, some couches, a round table and six chairs. There's another door in the study, which leads to another hall with two rooms and a bathroom between them. The rooms are mine and Kiko's and Usagi's. Keep going down the hall and turn left to the last room. Turn right to the bathroom.
The boy's, you go down the stairs and it's set up the same way. Anyway. I walked down the stairs and came to a hall, walked on through and came to the TV room. Light brown walls, a fair sized TV, almost as big as a big screen. A blue love seat in front of it and a brown leather chair beside that. In between the TV and couch is an oak rectangular coffee table.
I walked in and flipped the light switch, turning on the small lights in the ceiling. With the television off, I sat myself down on the love seat; putting my legs up, so that I'm lying on my back, with my head resting on the arm of the chair.
Finally, I can relax. I pulled the book in front of me, flipped to my spot and let the bookmark lay on the table. No one's going to bother me because if anyone does, I'm so going to kill them. Then, I let myself drift into the book, reading through each page.
Suddenly my ears twitched, someone was coming. Oh, I was just beginning to relax too. I didn't lift my eyes from the book, but whoever it was, was coming closer, heading for this room, if I'm hearing right. Still not looking up from my book, I took a quick sniff. No, why now? Now I'll never relax if he comes. Maybe he'll see me and leave. No that wouldn't work; he'd just ignore me.
You know what? I just realized something… I can't feel my legs, and the TV suddenly flipped on. I grumbled and put down the book next to the bookmark and looked at the person currently sitting on my legs.
"Yo! Sesshomaru!" he didn't answer me. "Hello! You're sitting on my legs!"
"I'm watching TV and you wouldn't move." He answered back still staring at the flickering television.
"You could have asked. Besides, I was trying to relax."
"Well, I'm here now. If you don't like it then leave." He said coldly.
Oh no… I'm not giving up that easily. "No you leave. I was here first." I crossed my arms in annoyance. Who does he think he is?
"I will not leave. This room is on my floor." The youkai answered emotionlessly.
"Well guess what. We're supposed to share the rooms. The kitchen is on my floor, does that mean that you can't use that room?"
"You know that I would starve."
"I have no problem with that." I sat up and grabbed the controller out of his hand and pressed the power button turning the TV off. "Now go away and let me read."
"Give me the remote."
"No. I want peace and quite and I intend to get it. Now get off my legs!"
"I don't think I will, unless you give me the remote." He looked towards me and smirked.
Hm, give him the remote so that he'll get off and allow me to feel my legs again? Or, don't give him the remote and fight with him about it? I think we all know where this is going. "No, I think I'll keep it."
"God damnit, give me the remote!" he shouted at me standing up, reaching his hand like I'll hand it right to him if he yells and shouts and gets mad.
Please, this is me we're talking about. I stand up, leaving the remote where I used to be sitting. "I won't give it to you just because you're yelling! So suck it up and if you don't like it, leave!'
"Stubborn hanyou." Sesshomaru seethed.
"Arrogant youkai." I crossed my arms, and we glared at each other. His glares being really cold and icy. My glares being I dare you to….
"Kai! Kai!" suddenly Neko's voice echoed through the halls as she came running up to us and stood beside me.
"What?" I asked not taking my eyes away from the youkai in front of me.
"I need help."
"I'm busy."
"Another fight?"
"Yep."
"How many times a day do you two fight?"
"…"
"Exactly."
"Ok, what do you need?" I asked bordly as I picked up my book from the table and placed the bookmark on my spot.
"The stapler's being mean to me." She whined.
"Neko. The stapler isn't being mean it's-" I was cut off, by Sesshomaru, who had been quiet this whole time and decides to speak.
"You simply don't know how to use it." he finished.
"Hey, I do to!"
"Then prove it." Then he walked away. Then I followed as Neko ran past me and up the stairs heading for the study.
I walked into the kitchen. I didn't even get to relax. Stupid Sesshomaru. He didn't have to get me riled up, he could have been nice but no. He decided to act like he's the king of the world and I'm his lowly servant that's not even worth glaring at. Humph. I guess it's nothing new. I shrugged and lay my head on the table.
"What should we have for dinner?" I asked out loud. I don't want to do something to… I don't know, just something simple. Maybe…. I can't think. I got up and was about to walk to the TV room when I heard someone call my name.
"Kai! I… need help!" it was Neko, oh dear, what happened now?
I walked into the study, surprised at what I saw. "Neko, what the heck happened?" I asked staring at her. She's stapled to the wall, above the ground with the stapler resting below her. How she ended up there, who knows.
"I told you the stapler hates me." Her red long sleeved shirt is pinned to the wall. He black bellbottoms are also pinned to the wall, some of her hair too.
Not this again. She's still convinced that the stapler hates her. Sigh, this is exasting.
"What happened here?" asked Miroku who had just walked in. He's wearing black pants with a black sleeve less shirt.
"Neko got herself stapled to the wall." I replied dryly.
"How'd she manage that?" he asked stepping beside me.
"I don't know. She says that the stapler was being mean to her."
"I see." I noticed Miroku was close to me…. a little to close for comfort and until I felt it. His, hand on my butt.
"Miroku," I said in a cheery innocent voice. "what do you think you're doing! You hentai!" my voice changed to enraged in that instant. Right away I grabbed his wrist, holding it away from me I stepped on his foot, slapped him across the face and then maneuvered him and me so that I ended up throwing him over my shoulder and onto the floor below Neko. "Stupid hentai…." I grumbled then left.
I paced through the door and was going to the library on the boy's floor. On my way down the stares I banged into the person I least wanted to see, Sesshomaru. I tried to get past him, but he kept blocking me. "If you want something then tell me." I stated. Sesshomaru didn't answer me. "If you don't want anything then move."
"Why are you getting mad at me?" he asked darkly.
I stared at him. "Grrr….. Just today, I just wanted to relax. And do you know what I get instead? First, you decide to sit on my legs and disturb me, then you try to order me around, we get into another fight. Then Neko gets herself pinned to the wall and Miroku decides to grope me." I panted…. Not taking my eyes away from him.
"I see." Then he walked past me and up the stares.
Ok, that was weird. Usually he'd defend himself better. Oh well. Library, here I come. I walked into the small book room. It's filled with selves of books, and a rectangular wooden table with six chairs. The walls are maroon with a few black lamps already turned on. Ok, who forgot to turn off the lights again?
Hm, let's see. There's bound to be something… Oh there! I reached up to the third shelf on a four shelved bookcase. One of my favorite manga's. It's called Fruits Basket. This one is volume nine. I took at seat at the table and opened the book to the first page when my ears twitched. Someone had just walked into the room.
I looked up and saw Miroku. Except he had a big bump on his head, and a black eye on his left eye. Now how did that happen? I know I didn't do it? I decided to ask and congratulate whoever did it.
"What happened to you?"
"Hm?" he looked over to me. He must have just noticed that I was here.
"I asked what happened? I know that I stomped on you foot, slapped you and threw you over my shoulder…. But… who did this?"
"Oh. Sesshomaru."
"Sesshomaru?" I asked a bit confused.
"Yeah. He said that if I tried to touch you again then he'd break my hands and possibly every bone in my body." He replied sitting in front of me.
"Why'd he do that?"
"How would I know? But, you two are opposites and they say that-"
I cut him off; I knew what he was going to say. "Opposites attract I know. Why does everyone say that? I know we fight but we're friends." He looked at me, his eyes full of interest, not the good interest either. "No. Friends as in friends…. Not friends as in love." I panicked slightly at the look he gave me.
"Kai, Miroku." Came an annoyed tone of voice, but not cold or dark.
"What?" asked Miroku. We turned and looked at the door to see Sasuke walking into the room. He's wearing a dark blue t-shirt and white shorts.
"Did you know that Neko's pinned to the wall?"
"Yeah why?" I asked.
"She's still there."
"Oopps….. Heheheheh…. I guess I forgot." I stood up, putting the book away, I walked towards the door.
"I'll help you." Said Miroku standing up. Together we walked out of the library and up the stairs. We finally reached the study and true to Sasuke's words….. Neko was still stuck on the wall.
"Well….?" Neko eyed me.
"Well what?" I stood on her left and Miroku on her right.
"What to you so long?"
"….I forgot?" Neko anime sweat dropped. "I'm taking you down now." I began pulling slightly on her shirt and pants, Miroku did the same thing. We managed to loosen the staples until they came out of the wall on their own. Her hair we gently pulled out. We could have just cut Neko's hair out….. but, she wouldn't let me or Miroku come near her with the scissors.
Finally, she was down. And Miroku took the stapler and put it away, away from Neko. "So, Sasuke told me that you were still stuck to the wall. How'd he-" she cut me off and glared.
"He walked into the room. He looked at me. I blushed, I think I saw him blush to… but I can't be sure. But he kept looking at me causing me to blush even more; I couldn't even hide the shade of red. Then he left."
"I see." I then walked away. Neko's so clueless, but then again…. So is Sasuke.
End of Flashback
So there you have it, the stapler incident. And that only happened a few days ago.
"Hey Kai!"
"Uh oh. Here comes Neko."
"What'cha doing?" she asked.
"Nothing."
"Hey I know that face. That's your 'I-didn't-do-anything-it's-not-what-it-looks-like-I-swear' face. What'd you do?"
"I know nothing." I replied.
"You told them the stapler incident didn't you."
"Now why would I do that?"
"I knew it." She advanced on me, glaring daggers.
I anime sweat dropped. "I couldn't help it. It's so funny, I had to tell them…"
"You had better start running."
"Uh…I'll see you guys in the next chapter. Hopefully, I'm still alive. Well, bye." I run away, please don't let her catch me. Wait. I'm a half-demon. I'll just tap into some of my youkai and speed away. "You'll never get me now!"
"That's cheating! You're using your demon powers aren't you?" she asked chasing after me.
"You will never know because you're never going to catch me!"
The end…or is it?