A/N: Uh-oh...WE REACHED 300! you all know that that means! A HENRY/YOUREYES1012 FIC!
I hope you guys like it! Co-written with BluestBlood.
For YourEyes1012! All those random shouts of MARRY ME paid off!
REVIEW PLEASE!
Disclaimer: i don't own anything!
Me: Hey guys! Guess what!
Clan: What?
Me: We reached 300 fics! You know what that means!
YourEyes1012: YES!
Clan: *high five*
Me: And here's out newest member! Criminally-insane-girl!Head of secret service!
Criminally-insane-girl: I'm so excited! This is my first day with the Clan! WE'RE SO AWESOME! I'm pretty sure the Clan could take over the world if we were fueled by Floor Sandwiches and various anti-bipolar drugs. Our weapon of choice would be ECT.
Me: Wait a second...
ElianaMargalit: What?
Me: I have...
Futurestar26: Yes?
Me: AN IDEA!
*The Clan huddles together*
***Later***
Agent Ilse Stiefel-Bashoff: So, Natalie...we're planning to take over the world. Any anti-depressants you reccomend?
Natalie: I get Europe if I help you.
Agent Ilse: Uh-Uh *splutters* MADAME PRESIDENT. xD
Me: Well, Nat, you see we already hooked up Dr. Madden with Europe. He gave us our ECT equipment. Henry gets America. You can have Asia!
Natalie: But I don't WANT Asia! I WANT EUROPE!
Me: Wow...you try to be nice and this is what we get? Tsk tsk...
Natalie: I hate you...
BluestBlood: Natalie, Asia has plenty of good things. I would know. I'm a ninja.
Natalie: Yeah, but does it have London? Paris? Rome? Athens? Berlin?
BluestBlood: No, but it has sushi and pretty scenery.
Gabe: *snort*
BluestBlood: ...Really, you wanna mess?
Gabe: No.
Clan: HAHA!
Gabe: I don't want to beat up a girl.
Henry: Gabe's afraid to hit a girl!
Gabe: Yeah, but I'm not afraid to hit you
Henry:..…
Me: boys...no fighting...or I'll send my ninja to attack you in your sleep.
Gabe: FINE! *punches Henry*
Henry: Ow...NO NE MAKES ME BLEED MY OWN BLOOD, BITCH! *punches Gabe*
Me: NINJA!
BluestBlood: HIYA!*knocks Henry and Gabe out* *bows*
Oreoprincess0401: Wow.
Me: Uh...you weren't supposed to knock them out.
Natalie: Oh God...*checks Henry's pulse* Um...i think this is serious.
Me: Oh Pshaw! It's probably just a minor injury!
Henry: *starts internally bleeding*
Me: Oops.
Natalie: *punches me*
BluestBlood: *facepalm* Communication. It is necessary. We need words so I know what you want me to do as a ninja. Bright side: They're not fighting anymore.
Dr Fine: NO WORRIES. I'M A DOCTOR. *pokes Henry*
Henry: What?...HI NAT.
Dr. Fine: What about Gabe?
Natalie: No, we're good now.
ElianaMargalit: Hey, Dr. Fine...has it ever occured to you that your a MENTAL doctor?
Dr. Fine: Oh yeah...
Henry: HOLY SHIT AM I GONNA DIE?
Dr. Fine: Uh, no...
Henry: Well, that's all I care about!
Diana: HOLY FUCK! GABE'S DEAD!
Criminally-insane-girl: No, he's just sleeping. He was busy...um...
Diana: Jazz band before school, class, key club and football! I guess you're right- I'd be tired too!
Agent Ilse: *mutter* Wow, what a pushover.
Gabe: *wakes up* WHAT'D YOU CALL ME?
Agent Ilse: Nothing.
Diana: GABE! You're alive!
Gabe: Well, yeah Im alive...why wouldn't I be?
Me: We thought you died!
Henry: Yeah...but you just HAD to wake up...
Gabe:*punches Henry*
Natalie: WE'RE NOT DOING THIS AGAIN!
Gabe: *punches Natalie*
Natalie: STOP! Can I just have Europe?
Henry: Oooh...Europe. Sounds...romantic. *winks suggestively*
Diana: EEEEEEEWWWW!
Oreprincess0401: ...Gabe, I thought you were afraid to hit girls?
Natalie: it's ok. He hits like a girl. Can I have Europe?
Me: Maybe you and Dr. Madden can switch?
Dr. Madden: No.
Henry: Natalie- I just flirted with you. Didn't you pick that up?
Natalie: Your point?
Gabe: Re-ject-ed.
Henry: WAAAAHH! NATALIE DOESNT LOVE ME ANYMORE!
Clan: Dont worry, Henry! we love you!
Henry: WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Natalie: Oh, that's enough! *Kisses Henry passionately*
Henry: *kisses back*
Natalie: *now making out*
Gabe: *With water hose* GET OFF MY SISTER!
Henry: AAAAHHHH! I'm wet!
Futurestar26: OHHH WATER HOSE. I can have it?
Gabe: No.
Futurestar26: I'll trade you my Summer homework!
Gabe: Oh, wow. No.
Futurestar26: Please?
Gabe: *is still directing hose and Henry* Nah.
Henry: I don't have a bathing suit on right now.
Gabe: Well, yeah. That's the point.
Henry: EEEEP!
Gabe: *Sprays him.* Hahahahahahaha!
Me: *facepalm*
Natalie: I still want Europe.
BluestBlood: *starts dancing in the water* I'm singingggg in the rain, just singingggg in the rain!
Gabe: *turns off hose*
BluestBlood: ...
Henry: *stops* Phew! Nat, wanna hug?
Natalie: No, I want Europe.
Me: Ok, Nat. We'll make a deal. You get Europe, YourEyes1012 gets to marry Henry.
Natalie: Deal.
Henry: WHAT?
Natalie: Im sorry Henry...but it's fucking Europe!
YourEyes1012: YESSSSS!
Henry: *weeps*
ElianaMargalit: Ya'll should probably shake on that before Natalie changes her mind.
Henry: Nat! Don't! I'm perfect for you!
Natalie: So is Europe...
Criminally-insane-girl: I feel like I'm watching Moulin Rouge. Which will Natalie choose...? Hm.
Dan: *sits down with popcorn* This is gonna be good.
Me: HAHAHAHAHA!
Dan: Why are you laughing?
Me: You made a pun!
Dan: Ok...
Henry: *on the floor begging* PLEASE DONT LET HER MARRY ME!
Natalie: Hmmmm...boyfriend...Europe. Boyfriend? Europe? I pick Europe. See ya! *darts off happily*
Henry: *whimper*
Dr. Fine: Good thing I also double as a minister! Ahem...Dearly beloved, we gather here today to bond these two in holy matrimony.
Henry: *silently cries*
Me: This is so beautiful!
Agent Ilse: *grabs some popcorn* This is my favorite part.
Gabe: Mine, too! The part where he doesn't marry my sister!
Oreprincess0401: *whispers* Natalie made a good choice- European guys...
Henry: *is sniffling*
Diana: WAIT. I OBJECT.
Dr. Fine: Anyone besides the crazy lady have an objection?
Diana: At least I have a spouse!
Dr. Fine: *sniffle* You didn't have to rub that in.
Dan: Yeah, Di. Too soon.
YourEyes1012: JUST MARRY US ALREADY!
Dr. Fine: Ok! Ok! Do you?
YourEyes1012: HELL YEAH!
Dr. Fine: Do you?
Henry: Um...uh...
Gabe: HE DOES!
Henry: I...uh...
Dr. Fine: Yay! You're married!
Henry:...
Gabe: YES!
Diana and Dan: *chuck birdseed and rice at couple*
Gabe: *chucking tennis balls at Henry*
Henry: Ow! Really, Gabe?
Gabe: Bowling balls are too heavy, plus these bounce back. Unlimited ammo, kid. Learn.
Diana: They grow up so fast. *sniffle*
Dan: *pats Diana's back*
Me: That was so cute! Ok, you two lovebirds! Go have a honeymoon!
Henry: NOOOO! I'M NOT HAVING SEX WITH HER! I'M NOT!
YourEyes1012: Who said anything about that?
Henry: Well, it's implied...
Gabe: This day keeps getting better and better!
Henry: *weeps frantically*
Gabe: *laughs hysterically*
Henry: YOURE GONNA DIE GABRIEL!
BluestBlood: This is better than a soap opera. *grabs more popcorn*
Diana: I agree- does anyone have any soda? I need to wash down some pills.
Gabe: Open bar for the wedding- right over there.
Henry: Wait- I don't remember...*looks to YourEyes1012 who shrugs* *looks back to Gabe* You KNEW?
Gabe: It's all on me, Not-my-new-brother-in-law!
Dan: But Gabe's dead- he has no money- that means...I...wait, GABE. YOU ARE GROU-!
Gabe: Bye! *darts off*
Dan: THAT LITTLE SHIT!
Henry: You tell him off, Mr. Goodman!
Me: Oh look! A postcard from Natalie! 'Just landed in London. I met Daniel Radcliffe on the plane. Ok! Gotta go! And sorry i missed the wedding'
Henry: MY LIFE IS RUINED!
Dr. Fine: Youre telling me...
Criminally-insane-girl: I just got a postcard from Gabe! "In Vegas. Spending whatever money our family has left. LOL. Bye!" Wow, he is a little shit.
Dan: *grumbles*
Diana: It's just a phase, dear. *pats Dan on the head.*
Henry: *sniffle* *lightbulb* Hey, let's go to Europe for our honeymoon!
YourEyes1012: No.
Henry: Please?
Dr. Fine: *singing "it sucks to be me"*
YourEyes1012: You just wanna go to Europe to get Natalie back!
Henry: *scoffs* No...I PROMISE I WILL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT BUT PLEASE LET ME GO TO EUROPE!
YourEyes1012: Ok!
Henry: YES!
Me: Wow...this has been a long day, huh?
Dan: *grumbles angrily*
Agent Ilse: Bye, Henry! Hope you find your Dad!
Henry: Wait, Mr. Narwhal?
Agent Ilse: No, you know- the code. *wink*
Henry: Oh. Yeah! I hope I find my "Dad", too! *runs off to the plane.*
Dan: Diana, we're gonna need a second job or something.
Diana: Ohh! I'll be a counsilor!
Dan: Diana, of all the jobs you shouldn't take, that's one of them.
Diana: Or I can be a school nurse! Or a secretary! Or one of those people who put caps on toothpaste! I always heard that was fun...
Dan: *facepalm*
Dr. Fine: Why don't you come and work with us? Dr. Madden'll love it!
Dr. Madden: Shut up!
Dr. Fine: You like her! You like her, like her!
Dr. Madden: I WILL STRANGLE YOU!
ElianaMargalit: When does the madness end?
Diana: Ohhh! What about a telemarketer?
Me: The last thing we need is a bipolar woman as a telemarketer.
***begin dream sequence.***
Woman: Hello?
Diana: Hi there! Would you like to buy...
Woman: Not interested, I'm sorry.
Diana: Well, fuck you.
Woman: Excuse me?
Diana: Nothing.
***end dream sequence***
Diana: Oh well! There'll be something out there for me! GASP! How about a court reporter?
***Dream sequence***
Judge: Well, Mr. Murderer...is it true that you killed Mrs. Jenkins than went outside and flaunted it around?
Murderer: Yes...
Diana: SICK FREAK!
Judge: Um...be quiet now...
Diana: Oh! I'm sorry! Do forgive me...YOU SICK BASTARD!
***real life***
Dr. Madden: Oh God no...
Dan: Why not...um...jockey?
**dream**
Diana: RUN YOU DAMN HORSE! Pretty please, horse...please go!
Announcer: Diana's yelling something, but we have no idea what!
***real***
Dan: That could work.
Dr. Madden: Dont you think that's a bit dangerous?
Dan: Of course not!
Dr. Madden:...
Dan: Besides, it'll help clear her mind!
Dr. Madden: Alrighty.
Diana: HORSIES!
Gabe: I'm back, and rich!
Dan: *lunges towards Gabe and takes all his earnings* You're grounded.
Gabe: Shit...
Oreoprincess0401: I got a text from Henry!
Futurestar26: What does it say?
Oreoprincess0401: Just found "my Dad." Thanks guys!
ElianaMargalit: Aww! How cute!
Gabe: I'm gonna go throw up now.
Me: Well, this sure has been an interesting day!
Dan: You're telling me...
Me: Happy 300 fics, everyone!
A/N: hahaha! Wow...that was long...lol
Reviews?