Is it really strange?

My ideas, my life, are they really that strange?

When all you have is yourself

When all you knew was yourself.

It's hard to let others in.

It's hard to ever let anyone in really.

Realizing that, is it really that strange?

Is it strange to already feel dead,

when you haven't really lived.

I've never really understood what it was meant to live.

No one has ever really allowed me to.

I've been told to live, is to love.

I use to try to love when I was younger,

but no one has ever tried to love me back.

I've been feared for so long that it's hard to believe anyone could really feel differently.

Therefore I act dead,

I feel dead,

so in away I'm able to live.

I live day to day without feeling the pain.

I don't let the others effect me as much anymore,

Because in the end how can it effect me,

if I'm dead.

Is it strange when the only thing you truly believe in,

is the fact that the dead really are the lucky ones.

So in a way, when I kill am I really being that cold hearted?

I'm a monster, a demon, but the way I see it,

I'm a savior.

I'm saving one the pain of guilt,

I'm saving those from the pain of loss, from loneliness.

I am the savior for those who feel the pain.

For if your dead how can you feel it?

So is it strange that the reason I kill wasn't ever for the blood,

But maybe it was to protect people?

Is it strange to hate something so much but to desire it even more?

I hate the way I yearn for love.

I hate the way others are given the opportunity to love, but not me.

I hate the way love mocks me everyday of my life by being

tattooed upon my forehead.

But most of all I hate the way I can't really hate love at all.

So, how I feel, is it really that strange?

Maybe my ideas aren't so strange.

Maybe to live isn't to love after all.

Because secretly everyone knows I'm right.

Because in the end living is futile because

The downs will always out number the ups.

Eventually you will feel the way I already feel,

Dead.

Maybe my ideas, my feelings aren't so strange in the end,

Maybe yours are.

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I do not own any of the characters in Naruto, although I wish I did. My story is simply how I feel Gaara feels. It is my opinion therefore one can not judge what I am trying to say in a negative or rude way. I appreciate those that review courteously and offer valuable advice such as grammar and spelling mistakes, for I surely doubt my writing is perfect. I always enjoy when readers review because they like what I write, so please review if you enjoy it. Thank-you

Desired-moonlight