By: Oldach's Dream

Summary: Shawn gets bored and types up Psych's very first office memo.

Disclaimer: Not mine.

A/N: No offence intended to anyone who reads the bible. It was all done in good fun. Also, I read something similar to this in another genre. If they're reading this, they know who they are. I'm not copying you, I promise:-D

10 Commandments

1. I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.

1. I am Shawn your God who brought you out of the land of supreme boredom. Don't forget to send postcards.

2. Thou shall have no other gods before me.

2. Thou shall put no faith in any other psychic detective. Miss Cleo doesn't count.

3. Thou shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not acquit anyone who misuses his name.

3. Thou shall not call me Mr. Spencer. That's my father. Any variation of any other nickname is fine. 'Your Majesty' wouldn't be too bad, either. (I'm talking to you, Lassie.)

4. Thou will remember the sabbath day, and keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work. But the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God; you shall not do any work—you, your son or your daughter, your male or female slave, your livestock, or the alien resident in your towns.

4. Thou shall not expect me to rise before noon on Sunday. Or any other day of the week, for that matter. Thou shall not expect me to do work unless I am supremely interested and anytime that American Duos is on, well, we just can't be interrupted. (That one's for you, Gus)

5. Honor your father and your mother, so that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.

5. Don't compare me to my father. Don't ask me about my mother. Don't expect me to care that your brother's uncle's sister's nephew's daughter's son is the Prince of Iceland because I know the Prince of Iceland, so I know you're lying anyway. Plus, I'm psychic. And families suck in general.

6. Thou shall not murder.

6. Thou shall not murder and expect to get away with it when me and Gus are working the case. Duh.

7. Thou shall not commit adultery.

7. Thou shall not commit adultery and get caught.

8. Thou shall not steal.

8. Thou shall not steal. We borrow. Really, borrow. As long as it's your intension to give it back, it's all good.

9. Thou shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

9. Thou shall not even try to lie to me. I'm a psychic, you silly-goose.

10. Thou shall not covet your neighbor's wife you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or male or female slave, or ox, or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.

10. Thou shall not covet my pineapples, my plasma TV, My Tivo, my best friend Gus, or anything else I own. Stay away from Jules, too. Not that I care. Really. I don't.