Last Stand

Just a little episode tag to Last Stand, the episode where Lantash finally dies in Lieutenant Elliot via symbiote poison. I thought I'd just do a wee ficlet on the effect the mission might have had on Sam. Please review!

Sam sat down heavily on the bed in her quarters. Her stomach was churning, and it had little to do with not having eaten for God knows how long.

She closed her eyes, and angrily fought back tears. No. She wouldn't let this get to her. She wasn't Jolinar. Lantash was nothing but a . . . a friend of a friend. Yeah right.

A knock on the door had Sam bolting upright. "Sam?"

Her father. Great. Just what I need.

"Come in." She called wearily.

The door opened, and Jacob slipped inside. "How are you doing, kid?"

"I'm not a kid." Sam said automatically.

Jacob frowned and looked closely at his daughter's face. No, she wasn't a kid. Far from it. Her youthful complexion held the weary expression of an old soul, with experience of far too much grief for her years. He thought about what had happened earlier. The death of Lantash, Martouf's symbiote, and the Tok'ra's new host, Lt. Elliot. Now there was a kid. He had been too young to die. No doubt Sam's heart was aching with the injustice of that, too.

"How are you doing?" Jacob tried again, moving to sit beside her on the bed.

"I've been better." Sam admitted.

"Elliot will have a hero's funeral." Jacob told her. "Here and with the Tok'ra."

Sam turned to smile grimly at him. "You mean Lantash will have a hero's funeral with the Tok'ra."

Jacob tilted his head. "Yes, but Elliot too. He saved a lot of lives selflessly. That won't be forgotten."

Sam nodded, but said nothing.

"Do you want to come? To Lantash's memorial?" Jacob asked her gently.

Sam flinched almost imperceptibly. "I went to Martouf's. I don't need to do it again."

"Oh?" Jacob raised an eyebrow. He knew what it was to have feelings for two people, within the same body. Selmak's mate, Hyr'oc, had died forty years earlier with his host, Joma. As confusing as that was for the Air Force General, he knew that Sam would be feeling the imprint of Jolinar's love, not just for Martouf, but for Lantash. Losing the latter would be just as significant a blow as the former.

"Sam, it's okay to grieve for Lantash. I know you only thought of him as Martouf, but the two are separate souls, who shared their love for Jolinar. And you. Jolinar loved them both. You must be feeling her grief."

"She's dead. She never grieved for them."

"But she loved them. And you feel the loss of that love now they're both gone. It's okay to let people see that it hurts. They can help."

Sam turned to face him angrily. "Who are you to tell me that? You didn't want to know that it hurt when Mom died! It was all 'suck it up' Sam, 'don't let them see you hurting', and 'Carter's don't cry'."

"I know, but that was a long time ago, and I was wrong. I'm not that person anymore. I've changed. Selmak has changed me."

Sam turned away and tried to blink back the tears, pressing her hands against her face. "I know. I'm sorry."

Jacob stood up, and put a hand on his daughter's shoulder. She turned and gratefully walked into his arms, unable to hold her emotions at bay any longer.

All too soon, Jacob felt her stiffen up, and pull away. "Thanks." She said, wiping her face with the back of her hand, already employing her military borne control to erect her emotional walls again. Jacob was sad to see that. Or at least sad that she didn't feel comfortable letting her own father see her cry. Maybe she'd trust someone else to help her. Maybe Daniel.

"You want some alone time?" He asked gently.

"Yes please." Sam answered, sitting on the bed. She just needed some time to sort her feelings out. Then she'd be fine, just like she always was.

Jacob took a last look at his little girl, all grown up and hurting, and left her. She'd be okay. She was always okay in the end. That's what made her a Carter.

That's it, unless in the months to come I suddenly get an urge to do more. Thanks for reading!

Beka