Kao-tan: This is being shifted over from my old account. ShardShattered, and as soon as this is posted the old version will be deleted. Gah! I haven't played Another Wonderful Life in FOREVER. This story brought back so many memories...and I wanted to rewrite it to make it better in honor of the wonderful game...-is now stuck on Sunshine Islands- But! You can also view this as being tied in with Harvest Moon: DS for girls because...well, it's similar as well. xD
Oh. This is a Rock/OC fic.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the character name Shard and the plot for this. Hopefully the re-written version is better. XD
Under Appreciated
Cold. That's all I felt. Cold and lonely as I lay, curled up in bed, with the covers drawn up tight around me. What else could I expect though? It was the middle of winter...why wouldn't be be cold? Shifting a bit I felt the cold edges of the sheets that hadn't been warmed by my prone figure. Cold cold cold. I don't even bother to turn around because I know exactly what will happen when I do. I'll see a cold, empty spot right beside me.
You know...I knew he wasn't going to help me around the farm. When the proposal was made he said so himself. So I really did know what to expect on his part. But...I never expected him to act like this.
Of course if I actually stopped to think about it, I remember how he used to act. He wasn't like this when we first got married. No...he was really good about staying by my side. Asking me how my day was. Sometimes he'd even attempt to make me dinner though it always ended up in a burnt up mess. But that was okay because I loved him with all of my heart and looking at that sad, distressed face was enough to make me draw him into a hug and sooth away his sorrows. But I suppose I never should have expected him to stay tied down so easily. It's not that I blame him, really. No...I don't. I guess I just expected too much from him.
I knew I should have just waited to see how he really acted. Before judging him on what little I knew and hoping, praying, that he'd act the way I wanted him to.
Biting my lip in preparation of what I knew was there, I rolled over so I was facing the spot, squirming from the warmth I'd made and into the cool space he always slept in. A sad smile tugged at my lips as I remembered the many times I had fussed at him for going to bed too late and waking up too early. He would always just laugh it off and run a hand softly though my hair and coo in that gentle voice that I shouldn't act stupid over something to trivial. Of course back then I had thought that he was just being sweet. Now I'm not so sure.
I pushed the memory away, knowing there was no use in dwelling on the past. Especially at such late an hour. Three o'clock in the morning was not an ideal time to be awake. Now with all the work I had to do come six. All the work I'd have to do by myself. Without a bit of encouragement. I needed to check on all the animals. To make sure they were all healthy and happy. I needed to feed the horse and the cows, mile and brush them. Gather all the eggs from the chickens and the ducks. Feed them as well. I was slowly starting to run out of fodder so I needed to get out and fertilize the field...and with any luck it wouldn't be raining so I could let all the animals out for a little bit.
Ha...and you know what? That isn't even the tip of the ice berg. That's just the start of a wonderful day in my wonderful life, here in Forget-Me-Not Valley. But do I get a thanks for all my hard work? No. At the end of the day I get a kiss on the forehead and a whispered goodnight.
Well...perhaps the animals appreciate me.
But I'm struggling to make sure we have enough money. Supporting just myself and a few animals was easy. But my farm has grown a bit and now that I have a husband to support as well it seems that my income just isn't enough any more. I've even had to resort to selling a few chickens and their chicks as well. Even my deal little sheep is long gone. If I can't scrap up enough money so I can breed my cows soon, I'll have to sell my horse in place of the milk.
Do I get a 'Honey, let me help you. We'll pull through this...together.'? No. When I actually get the courage to voice my concerns to him all I get is a crooked smile and sparkling blue eyes as he tells me that I'll think of something. Me. I'll do all the work. And oh how hard is it for me to argue when he looks so cute with that look on his face. That goofy, carefree look that he always wore back when we first met. When I used to go down to the beach and watch him as he watched the Ocean. Everything seemed so simple back then. What happened?
I turned my head just enough so I could see the clock before nestling closer to the wall. 4:30 AM. Had an hour and a half really gone by so fast? Just another and I'd have to be up. I usually wouldn't mind if it wasn't for the fact that I haven't been able to sleep a wink since he left. And I can't just blow off work in order to rest. I have responsibilities to take care of. But it's just so hard. It's like this every single night and it just doesn't stop. My crops are going to start suffering for it and their one of my last hopes for this farm. But do I hear him tell me to take it easy and let him help? No.
Maybe it's my own fault for loving him. For falling for someone like him. Maybe it's my fault for falling for his charm. My fault for caring. No. I know it's all my fault. But sometimes...when I'm surrounded by cold and loneliness...I wonder why it can't be his fault just for once. Why can't he be the one having to work himself to death trying to save this farm? Why can't he be the one who's left to lay awake at night, wondering where I am? Why...why can't he be the one who's under appreciated?
The sound of the door opening jars me from my thoughts and I felt my body tense up. I don't dare to relax until I hear the soft click of the lock as it shuts. But I don't move. Nor do I move when the sound of clothes hitting the floor and draws opening fills the once silent air. It's always the same thing. Come home, change clothes, go to bed. I'm thankful for that, because I don't really want to know what's still clinging to the fabric despite the fact that I know his skin always smells faintly of smoke perfume that isn't mine.
But it's not like I haven't grown accustom to this awful routine by now. It happens every night. So why can't I just sleep through it?
The bed shifted on the other side I felt him slip under the covers. It's not but a few moments later that I feel him wrap a slim around around my waist, drawing me nearer to him. The cold sting of the bed is swiftly chased away by the warmth that he wraps around me from the almost tender embrace.
"Why are you so far away?" Rocks voice echos in my ear, sounding sleepy and exhausted. Same thing every night. And just like every night I immediately respond to his voice by turning around and cuddling closer to him. Nuzzling my face into the crook of his neck and hiding myself away in his warmth as he lets out a sigh of contentment.
Contentment? I let out a soft, bitter laugh which he must have mistaken for one of joy because the sound causes him to stroke my back softly. The loving sensation almost has me shuddering, though not because of his tenderness. No. Because of the memories it brings back to me. The thoughts and the feelings. I close my slowly as he wishes me a goodnight, his own sapphire orbs closing as he prepares for his upcoming day of sleeping and resting before another night of partying.
Again I can feel the doubt I'd grown for him start to slip away as I wonder why he can't be like this every day. Why he can't draw me into his arms and hold me. To whisper how much he loves me instead of just wishing me a goodnight. Them my thoughts start to drift to something else.
An upcoming problem that should be a blessing. But the more I dwell on it the more I realize how bad the situation I'm putting us in. I'm putting me in.
I know.
I know I'm being taken for granted. As though I can take care of everything without help or without a thanks. Without any loving encouragement. I know I'm under appreciated.
But I wonder...what I'll be to him.
Once I tell him I'm pregnant?
Kao-tan: I managed to stretch it out a bit longer. Yay for improved writing! XD But eh...I still love it. I hope you will too?