The Continuing Story of Mystery Riddle
the 'other' Mary-Sue
Mystery Riddle arrived at Hogwarts,
About five years too late.
But as the befuddled Headmaster said,
"Who's to stop the promptings of fate?"
So Mystery stepped on the Hogwarts Express,
In her wide violet eye formed a tear.
For everyone wished her to sit next to them –
"Hey," spoke Harry, "you can sit here!"
"We can tell you're wicked by that glint in your eye,
And the darkness of your raven black hair,
And what did you say was your surname again?
Aw, heck, we really don't care!"
At the sorting, to hear where our heroine belongs,
Hogwarts students waited with bated breath.
The sorting hat finally cried, "I can't decide!
So I'll make you our first Slyther-Gryff!"
In Potions class that following week,
She amazed them all with her brew.
Snape was amazed, he actually smiled,
"Want a hundred? I'll give Potter one too!"
Draco leapt down onto his knees,
Cried "Mystery, I'm yours forever!"
Mystery just batted her lashes and mused,
"You'd look pretty hot in black leather…"
So Draco's redeemed, and Snape's being nice,
And Mystery keeps bringing them in.
But when Voldemort appeared at Hogwarts for tea,
Mystery pointed her wand straight at him.
"Dastardly deeds, you wicked old man!"
"But Mystery," he wailed, "I'm your father!"
"I know that you fool, but it's time that you paid."
And with that, she Avada Kedavra-ed.
Harry looked on, very impressed,
As Mystery casually sipped at her tea.
"Wow, Myst'ry, you never told us all that!"
He dropped to his knees – "Marry me?"
Mystery merely smiled at him,
And tossed her raven black hair.
"Oh Harry, you know so little of me,
Draco's my true love, so there!"
"Not only am I Voldemort's only child,
Ha! That's far too ordinary –
My mother is Snape, my sister was Lily,
And you are my Godfather Harry!"
Okay, okay… I know that it doesn't flow perfectly, and some of the rhymes aren't the greatest. But I woke up this morning with the Draco verse and the last verse in my head, and needed to get them out. So here it is – my first attempt at poetry. And my first spoof of fan fic *ducks* Hope you enjoyed it! The title was ripped off from the Beatles song "The Continuing Story of Buffalo Bill". Mystery Riddle is mine, and the awful rhymes are mine, but Harry and Co. belong to J. K. Rowling.